Surrogate
by elsac2
Summary: A man she had not met more than ten minutes in her entire life was now standing at her door begging for her help and she did not know what to do. When she had agreed to take the money and give them what they wanted, she had never thought she will see them again. She was only supposed to be a surrogate mother. full summary inside , give it a try.
1. Chapter 1

_**Okay my muse is hateful, just started my classes back and that when she decide to manifest herself with this little one. So please read, review and show love, I hope you will like it.**_

 _ **Surrogate**_

 _ **Summary: A man she hadn't met more than ten minutes in her all life was standing at her door begging for her help and she did not know what to do. When she had agreed to take the money and give them what they wanted, she had never thought she will see them again. She was only supposed to be a surrogate mother**_. _**Complicated situation leaded bonnie to agree to be a surrogate mother in Italy and she hoped to never hear about it but destiny and faith have plan of they own. Will she be capable to walk away from her blood and flesh once again?**_

 _ **This chapter was beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma and thank you so much. lovelies please do check her story because she is just the superhero that saved you from unbearable mistakes**_

* * *

A knock at her door disturbed her peaceful nap and she awakened abruptly. Bonnie looked at the clock and it was four in the afternoon. She pulled her jersey and quickly checked that proof of her little nap had disappeared from her face. : She marked the page she left off on in the book she was reading just before she fell asleep when the knock became insistent. She snorted and yelled, "a moment please" and she started running to the door almost knocking the little lamp on the table near the entrance.

She stood on her toes to look through the peephole that was a bit high and she did not recognize who was at the door. Therefore she got a bit suspicious but only screamed through the door "I don't want anything that you are selling," and she was on her way back to the table and pursued her studying from the page she was on before her nap interrupted it.

"Bonnie Bennett, is there a Bonnie Bennett there?" the man asked a bit hesitantly, she came back to check at the mention of the name and became intrigued he knew her name but he had never met her, she was sure of it. So she assumed it was a university representative or maybe someone from the bank. She had been in debt for a long time and with her grams sick the finance were drowning.

She sighed and opened the door slightly, she looked fully at the man and he seemed like he had been having a rough day. She looked at him and found him somehow really familiar but she doubted she had seen him before because he was one of those Apollo's with unforgettable sculpted features.

The man had amazing azure eyes that revealed the blue of the most beautiful ocean, his skin was alabaster almost transparent , he had jet black hair that were as dark as a crow feather and his jaw line was a view. He was painfully beautiful she would have said if someone had asked her. But his entire traits were tense and he seemed really anxious, he was shaking his leg impatiently. If he was not so formally dressed and his suit did not look so expensive she would have locked the door and called the police.

* * *

"I am Bonnie Bennett may I help you?" she asked with a hint of hesitation and still maintaining the door half closed. She saw a little frown on the man face and then surprise appeared on his feature

"She is younger than I thought " he mumbles a bit taken, she did not look like she was more than twenty three, he must have had the wrong woman but his secretary had confirmed the address and the agency too.

Bonnie heard what he said and it alerted her. What does being young have to do with anything? She observed the man again and he really looked tense, _something was fishy_ she thought _. What was all of this about?_

"Well hey mister what does my age to do with you being at my door "she asked a bit irritated, she wanted to go back to her studying and he was wasting her time. She had little free time, when her college schedule did not crowd her life; her time was spent taking care of grams in the absence of her dad.

"Sorry you heard that "he said. He really thought he had said that little thing in his mind; but he seemed he had said that aloud. He really did not know why he was even standing there but he really had very few options. She looked so much like her. He looked back at his car for a second; he hoped she was fine waiting by herself.

"Nothing actually. Can I come in Miss Bennett? "He said and Bonnie notice he had a bit of a foreign accent if she had to make assumptions she would say Italian, but it was really a faint accent.

She looked at him and became more suspicious _. What did this man want_ and for a second she hesitated before replying "is that really necessary? Can you just say whatever you came here to say from the door?"She was being a little bit rude but she was not inclined to let a stranger in her house and the neighborhood was not known to be the safest place in the city. And even a man who looked like a roman god in a fancy suit would have to discuss whatever he came to discuss at the door,

"I would prefer if we can do it seated, what I have to say his really not a matter I would like to discuss on your porch." He argued but she did not give an inch and even pushed the door a bit, closing it more. That aggravated Damon; he looked at his watch and saw he might be late for one of his business meeting if he kept this up but this woman seemed like the stubborn type.

"I'll take my chances and have this conversation where we are standing right now" Bonnie countered glaring at him

"I doubt you would like to talk about your daughter standing on the porch of your door. But that is just a guess." He said with irritation this was not going like he was expecting.

* * *

Bonnie looked at Damon like he had lost his mind, she stared at him to make sure everything was fine with this man before bursting into a laugher. Damon on his part was annoyed maybe he had the wrong woman, he looked at her and she was really not matching up with the age the file was saying. If she did look like the woman on the picture she was younger, she could be the woman's daughter.

But if he looked at his daughter this woman was definitely the mother. His daughter Leila had that very distinctive crooked jaw, the cupid bow mouth and her eyes shape but his eyes color and her hair was slightly less dark than his. And seeing how his little angel was growing she might just be a carbon copy of the woman standing behind the door.

"Well is this a joke, because I don't have a daughter." Bonnie said still laughing she could not believe what was happening at her door, someone really thought this would be a funny joke which one of her friends had come up with the idea, if she find out she would probably end his life.

"Bonnie Sheila Bennett , daughter of Ruby Hopkins and Abigail Bennett " he asked waiting for her answer and she just nodded wondering where he was going with that but he pursued answering her unspoken question " well if that is you then you definitely have a daughter to whom I happen to be the father."

"Okay you sir need help, you might be insane I would remember if I had sex with you and ended knocked up. A pregnancy is a thing hard to forget" she said raising her voice a bit and starting to close the door but he was quick and stopped it with his legs.

"Italy 2009, how much was it again twenty thousand euro, a child and an assured discretion that was what the agency guaranteed. Correct me if I am wrong "he told her with exasperation and he saw how her eyes widen and her overall expression became tense. Her mouth fall agape for second and it seemed as if all lights in her brain had gone off.

"Kill me now" was the first thing that came into Bonnie mind, then she felt like her heart stopped beating , she looked at her stair hoping Grams was not awake and she could not hear the conversation going downstairs. Then her heart started racing and her mind also, tons of questions came in a fraction of seconds. Her year abroad came back to her and the secret she had buried deep and memories she had forced herself to forget threaten to resurface. She mentally cursed and she felt out of breath and bile rose making her mouth bitter. She was at loss for words.

She thought she had left this entire story in Italy and the cash for it was long gone. Nothing could prove that it even happened. She thought about negating everything in her file, she had used a picture of her mom when she was younger but one look at the focused man in front of her told her that it would not work. She started sweating; she had to do something no one knew about this, no one in her family knew and not one of her friends had heard about it. She was getting stressed and she forgot the man at the door until he spoke to her.

" Earth to Miss Bennett , I see that rings a bell" he pursued with a smirk and if she was not step away from a cardiac arrest she might have drooled over that smirk but right now her mind was racing and she was scared her grams would come out.

Bonnie stepped out of the house and made sure to close the door. When she came out he noticed how petite the young woman was. She barely reached his shoulder and the way she was looking at him, he felt the fire in her eyes. She grabbed his arm and pulled him a bit to the side, away from her porch and started talking through gritted teeth like she was hiding something

"What are you doing here; it was supposed to be anonymous. You were not supposed to come at my door with this crap" she said inflamed, she wanted to burn something at this point. This all story was a mistake motivated by other youthful mistake. She needed quick money at the time and it was quick money. She had not considered the consequences; she never even thought there will be consequences.

"Well I know it was supposed to be anonymous, and obviously I would not be standing here if it was not necessary for Leila sake. That is the name of your daughter and..." he could not finish. He was interrupted by Bonnie cutting him. The brunette vehemently interrupted to mention her rebuttal to having the girl labeled as her daughter.

"Don't call her that, she is not my daughter and I don't want to hear anything you have to say about her or about anything mister." She almost shouted but held it because her grandmother must be on the verge of waking up and she needed this to end before that happened.

"Anyway she needs your help and you are my last hope, she is in a complicate situation and that is why I am here." He pursued not losing his purpose even her angry green eyes could not stop him. He had to do this and he was not taking any pleasure doing it. He would have been happy if he never had to contact her for anything during his entire life but circumstances had decided otherwise.

"Are you freaking deaf or I am not clear enough, I don't want to know anything about this, about her. That shit happen seven year ago. I took my money and you took your daughter. So leave me alone." She shouted this time and Damon put his hand over her mouth to stop her. Leila was in the car and he did not need her to listen anything that was being said between him and the Bennett young woman.

"Don't touch me."She pushed his hand aside and slapped it away. She was angry everything related to her year in Italy was filled with bad memories and a darker place of her life. So she did not need them to come creeping back in her life one more time. She had erased everything from that time and this was guaranteed to pull her back.

* * *

Damon took back his hand and pointed toward the car where a little girl was sitting "she is the car and she does not need to hear what you were about to say. So please keep it low." When he said that Bonnie looked at the sports car parked in front of her house and she could make a little girl with curly hair, she stopped breathing and became emotional. Tears came to her eyes and everything became too real.

 _That is Leila, my daughter_ she thought and she was about to cry before her mind brought her back to reason _she is the little girl you sold get it together Bennett. You know better now. She is not your daughter. You made that decision six years ago._ She looked at Damon her eyes filled with pain and tears. Why did this man have to bring this crap at her door? She was done with that past and she had buried it.

"Let me be clear with you, whatever you want forget about it. I don't want to see her or you again, stay away from me and my house." She finished and entered her home not leaving him any time to explain. He knocked on her door again but she only threatened him to call the police if he persisted. So he walked toward his car. Bonnie peeped through the door and saw him open the car's door. He was adjusting the little girl seatbelt and she stole a glance at her daughter. But she only saw her hair. Beautiful cascade of black curls and then he turned to give a last look at the house before entering his car.

"She must be beautiful" she said aloud and her grams entered the room asking with a bit of confusion

"Who baby, I heard you talking was there anyone at the door?"

"No one Grams I was just thinking, there was no one." She said trying to rush to her room, she needed a good cry and she was barely holding the tears back and was sure her grandmother would see her glossy eyes soon enough.

"But whoever it was got you shook. You look like you have seen a ghost. You know you can talk to me baby girl." The elder Bennett could not be fooled when he came to her granddaughter; she had raised the girl and could tell when something was deeply wrong. And whatever it was this time it was big. She hoped Bonnie would come around and would tell her whatever it was soon.

"I know Grams but it is nothing. Don't worry yourself about it. Did you take your medicine" she said to distract the old woman. Sheila could read to her attempt but let it pass there was no point of pushing for more when it came to her granddaughter. She nodded yes and Bonnie walked to her room. Something was definitely wrong.

* * *

Damon was driving silently his mind was racing and he was pissed. He had travel all the way to this small town and he could not even tell the woman a word about Leila situation.

"That bitch" he cursed and his little girl behind giggled then started coughing which worried him.

"Are you ok back there principessa?"He inquired and looked to see if everything was fine

"I am okay but no bad word paparino, you owe a dollar now" the six year old girl said with a smile.

Damon looked at his daughter to confirm everything was fine; he would make sure of it when he dropped her off at her oncologist in an hour. She looked okay today but he wanted to be careful with her and make sure nothing disturbed her.

"Okay I will give it to you and even buy you an ice cream if you promise to never repeat that word" he told with a wide smile

"Okay but can we go now, I want a gelato" She answered with a smile of her own

"You know we can't now, you are late for your doctor's appointment." Damon said

"I hate going to the doctor, it is painful can we not go just today." The little girl said almost crying to the memory of the previous day.

"I know principessa but we have to but I promise you soon enough it will end." He said with conviction, he just had to convince bonnie to help. His daughter would not be victim to leukemia.

* * *

 _ **Okay so this is the first chapter if you like it please follow, review and fav. So I know if it worth to continue. Tip the writer to keep her motivated. Kisses my lovelies until another time.**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Well thanks for the review and follow, I felt inspire to write more so here it is. Hopefully you will like this chapter also. Review fav, follow and don't judge Bonnie too harshly because well she is only human**_

 _ **I disclaim everything, tvd is not mine or by now Bamon will be having baby number three.**_

 _ **This chapter was beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma and thank you so much. Lovelies please do check her story because she is just the superhero that saved you from unbearable mistakes**_

* * *

Damon and Leila arrived at the office of her oncologist and as usual the overall ambiance was gloomy. They had been coming to this hospital since he moved from Florence to Atlanta after he started his hunt for her biologic mother. Today was no different from the other visits; in a normal situation it was never exciting to go to the hospital, but when it was cancer related it was even more depressing.

Leila was usually tense and normally tightened her grip on his hand, but today she seemed even more tense than usual which made him make no attempt to look his daughter in the eye, but he forced himself to smile so he could offer her a bit of strength. He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb and she smiled at him or more like she tried. He missed her happy and full smile so much, but he understood why she had lost her spark.

He hated coming to this hospital as much as his daughter did, but he had no other choice. His ex-wife had decided she could not cope with it, so she had stepped out for his biggest hardship. Luckily Leila never asked about her.

The smell of bleach, chloride made him feel uneasy; everything looked so clean and lifeless. The white corridor had an accent of death and the bright lights didn't help with the other things that made him deeply uncomfortable.

Looking back at how this all turned out, it all seemed ^so surreal because only ^just months ago the doctors and him were all convinced that his daughter's affliction was nothing more than a severe cough or at worse a pulmonary infection. She was only coughing and wheezing and had a headache. They all thought she would be fine within a week.

But a few blood vials and an incredible amount of medical tests later, the bad news came. He had never seen so many types of needles in his life and when they told him his little angel had acute lymphocytic leukemia he laughed and told then they had the wrong results. Her cough was just getting worse. But the doctors insisted and he broke down. He cried in the doctor's office forgetting all about his pride and Rose, his ex-wife, stormed out of the room. It was the last time she set foot in a hospital when it came to Leila. She called often and spent time with their daughter but Damon was resentful. After that day visits to the hospital became an everyday routine.

Damon walked Leila inside doctor Fell's office; she was his daughter's pediatric oncologist. The woman was gentle and it helped that she was friendly with Leila.

They sat the beautiful little girl on the bed. Today was the day that they had to control the progression of the disease and those were the worst day. His princess would be poked by umpteenth needle and an incredible amount of blood would be taken from her.

When Leila saw the biopsy needle, a monstrous metallic syringe that had been the main instrument of torture in this terrifying nightmare of her constant visits to the hospital, her grip on her father became unbreakable ^and she latched on ^to him. She took cover behind him and tears of fear started falling. She wanted to run out of the room but her legs would not cooperate because her chemical treatment made her extremely weak

* * *

"Everything will be fine; I am here right next to you principessa mia" Damon says picking her up and settling her on his hip. She was crying endlessly and her tears were becoming heavy on her skin and her eyes had taken a redness that strongly contrasted with their normal blue and she started choking on her own words, fighting to emit her protest.

"Can we just go papa, I promise I'll try to be better. Please don't make me do this" she begged, and Damon's heart broke when he met her big pleading eyes. His little girl did not deserve this, ending up with a rare disease. Leukemia was so rare in children, but his angel had to be the one. She looked deep into his eyes and broke his conviction.

Damon turned to doctor Fell and asked, "Do we have to do this today? Please, she has been having a rough day. Her state couldn't have changed that much."

"Damon, I am sorry, but you know how precarious Leila's situation is. She's in an intermediary stage and we really need to control the evolution, I'm sorry." Doctor Fell said perfectly understanding the dilemma Damon was in, but like every time, she had to remind him this was not a stage one cancer. The situation was cause for concern.

Damon gave her a cross smile and picked ^up the face that was softly sobbing on his jacket and wiped her tears trying to offer some kind of comfort. He sighed and readied himself to give her the same speech on bravery which he had stopped believing in, but she needed that little bit of hope and support.

"Hey bambina look up here, what does a Salvatore never do?" he asked with a very solemn tone staring into tearful blue eyes that looked so much like his own.

"A Salvatore never cowers in the face of danger. We're heroes that can defeat anything." She replied with a little trembling voice but with certitude and pride.

"Then here another hardship we will both face and at the end we will be proud. I know it's painful but I will be here the whole time. I just need you to do this for a second, Doctor Fell will be careful. She has done it before and you told me it was okay or did you lie because you didn't want me to worry." He said feeling guilty for using that on her, but tricking her was the only way.

She tapped on his shoulder to ask to be put down. She wiped her tears away and tried to portray a false bravado. Leila was a very delicate little girl and a bit frail but had very dignified posture for her age. She looked up at her dad reassuringly, never wanting to hurt his feelings. She always cried before the biopsy, but in the end she would always try to reassure him. She was too considerate for her age; Damon always thought she must have gotten that from his brother who was Leila's best friend. That was another side effect of her disease, making friends was hard.

"I didn't lie, papa" she said and then looked at her pediatrician before asking "will you be gentle like the other day, so it won't hurt me?" her eyes were begging the woman for a positive answer.

"I will be; I always am with brave little girls like you" Doctor Fell said extending her hand to her. She took it with the encouragement of her dad. The rest happened like it always did; they took a bit of her blood while she held Damon hand with so much strength that her knuckles became white. She tried to hold in her tears, but the pain was excruciating, later she received a drug cocktail that removed all ounce of life from little girl as her tears were not enough to tire her. They finished hours later until it was late at night.

It was too late for the ice cream he had promised her, but she could not even manage to keep her eyes opened. She was dead asleep, giving in to the pain, taking a well-deserved rest in her dad's arms. He cuddled her in her bed and tried to focus on what doctor Fell had told him. The situation was really not getting any better nor in his favor. The odds were against them and he really did not know what to do.

* * *

Bonnie had not left her room since she had taken refuge in it. She felt angry and consternate by her bad luck. Everything was going sideways this year. Grams had been going in and out of the hospital and she had to comeback to the stupid little town of Mystic Falls for months putting her year of college on hold because her father did not have time to take care of her grams. She was the only possible option seeing as her other relatives were roaming somewhere around the globe.

Lucy never stayed in one city. Even thinking about Lucy made everything worse; she was the one that came up with the whole Italy trip. And here she was hiding from her family the existence of a child she had mothered. She angrily stared at the wall feeling her blood boil. This was insane. She stood and went through her old stuff looking for the agency card. She was sure she had kept it somewhere, they had promised her anonymity and seven years later a man with a pompous suit came knocking on her door.

She needed to talk to them ^and give them her piece of mind. _And what will it change;_ _he's already here and knows where you live_ she thought. She wanted to scream. She had always been a good girl, but always hung out with the bad entourage and that's what had led her into that mess seven years ago. She always had this silly idea to play savior and now she was the only one to have her life almost broken.

 _But she is so pretty and that beautiful hair. You should have looked. I should have just taken a look at her_ she thought, that's what went through her head when her guilt replaced her anger. She had seen her daughter for the second time in her life. The first time she saw her she was just a small fragile little being with amazingly blue eyes. And thinking back on it, she should have recognized that distinctive blue as soon as her eyes met that man's. She could have avoided all of this if she had closed the door early enough.

 _You would've never seen her_. The weaker part of her thought sorrowfully. _But I'd be fine_ _never seeing her again_. Her mind countered vehemently and then she started crying again. She wished she had never seen those pretty blackish curls with the ethereal undulation. They looked like a halo and she wondered how her face looked. She knows the little girl has her crooked jaw. That was the first thing the nurse told her. She hated herself for remembering all those little details now. That special day should be erased from her memory but instead at this exact moment she was a crying mess feeling half dead.

If she thought about it, today was no different from the days she spent after giving her away. They told her it would be easy, once she signed the papers and got the money, everything would end. And it did ended for six years, but now she was back.

She grabbed her bed sheet and hid below it. She thought about calling Caroline, her best friend, but where would she start, "hi I forgot to tell you that I have a child, but it is not my child. She's just someone carrying half of my DNA and the twenty thousand euro I received seemed like it was enough at that time."

She felt restless again, the whole afternoon and night had been a back and forth between her thoughts. She could not stop thinking about the little girl. She was called Leila, he told her and she had repeated that name for hours.

She was drowning in her thoughts. She was scolding herself for even thinking about it. The past was the past; she had left everything related to that time in her life where it deserved to be, in the trash and whatever happened she would never reopen. As she fell asleep, she decided to make sure that part of her past never resurfaced again.

* * *

Bonnie awakened tired with puffy eyes. She had to find a way to hide the physical expression of her turmoil if she wanted to avoid her grams suspicions. She ran into her bathroom and after a warm shower, during which she cleared her mind, she attempted to conceal the proof of her sleepless night and with a bit of makeup she succeeded. Now she just had to fake her usual jovial mood and she would make it through the door peacefully.

Sheila was waiting for her granddaughter at the bottom of the stairs; she knew something was deeply wrong since Bonnie had run into her room yesterday afternoon and didn't come out. She did not even come to remind her about her nightly pills and that was abnormal.

Bonnie came out of her room and she drew in a deep breath. She could do this. She ran down the staircase kissing her grams in an exaggerated way that did not escape the Bennett matriarch, but she kept her cool. Sheila offered to make breakfast, but Bonnie was already running out of the house shouting that she would be late to catch her bus. Checking the clock confirmed that was false and with that, the few doubts Sheila had been confirmed. Her granddaughter was avoiding her and that meant she was in some type of trouble. She would give her time to come around before she made it a personal matter

Bonnie rushed out of the house reaching her bus stop an hour early. She sighed and felt the tension leaving her shoulders. She needed time before returning to her normal routine, but hopefully work would help get her head out of this nightmare. She never thought the day would come where she would bless the waitress job she had taken to help with the growing list of bills piling at home.

Having time on her hands, she could not stop thinking about what happened yesterday. She pulled her phone out and started texting the only person on this side of the world involved.

"I need the name of the agency you hooked me up with. They messed up." she did not have to wait for an answer.

"Three years without even acknowledging my existence and that is what you want to talk about."

"You know what forget about it and please don't take this as a sign to call me back. You and I still have nothing to talk about" she replies pissed and regretting even hitting send on the first text.

"Bon you can't be like this forever, it was not my fault and you need to accept that" she received as reply.

"You know what, I have something to tell you and I think I haven't said it enough: FUCK YOU and GO TO HELL." she wrote irritated, but deleted the message not seeing the point in entertaining her interlocutor any longer. She was done, many things had happened in Italy and she might have made reckless decisions, but they were all motivated by her big heart and now she was regretting it. She was done helping people. People were ungrateful; she'd learned the hard way.

Her bus arrived and she hopped in. She was furious, but there was a positive side to her fury, her mind was too busy to think about other things

* * *

Damon was standing in front of a small coffee shop observing the woman he met yesterday. He could not believe he had to go through such lengths, but after what Doctor Fell had told him he had really no choice, Bonnie Bennett had to see reason. If he could not appeal to her heart, he would persuade her differently. He had done some research about her last night. He had asked his secretary to find someone who could look into her life.

He really did not want to antagonize her, but if he had to go through such extents, he would sans hesitation. It was up to her to decide how this could go. He looked at the café where she was supposed to be a waitress. He had discovered that in his research last night, but he was still waiting on more and he hoped he would not have to bend her will. He took a deep breath and entered the café.

The space was pretty cozy and small, not really crowded but still had a decent amount of patrons. There was a fair amount of waitresses, but it was easy to find her. She stood out immediately and caught Damon's attention. She was way too beautiful for the small café that she worked in and had a dancer grace. The way she moved through the tables was extremely fluid. He observed her for a decent amount of time, she was smiling with some of the patrons and he noticed she had the same exact smile as his daughter. After few minutes he came out of his trance and called for a waiter and as luck would have it, minutes later, he saw her coming toward him.

Bonnie did not notice Damon at all, she was way too busy with the other patrons and when she came to his table, she was looking at her little carnet. So she engaged him with a bright smile that confirmed what he thought, her smile was as beautiful as Leila's. But somehow it looked different on her, he did not notice it the other day, but she was extremely beautiful, even more than the woman she chose to put in her agency file.

"Can I help, have you decided what you want sir?" she asked with a joyful tone and Damon was taken by the difference. He hoped this time she would be more amenable.

"A glass of bourbon" he said and a little frown formed on her face, but she wrote down his order anyway still not raising her head.

Absent mindedly she said aloud what she thought, "Ain't it a bit early for alcohol" and when she noticed what she said, she rose her head to apologize. Her entire expression changed and fury distorted her features causing her complexion to blemish; changing her entire demeanor.

"What are you doing now, stalking me?" she asked offended and a bit abrasively. She looked at the man and felt anger, why couldn't he leave her alone?

"Well you left me no choice when I tried to talk to you yesterday." Damon simply replied before smirking. She looked at him and rolled her eyes. _What was he trying to do_ _throwing a flirty smile at a time like this?_ She thought.

"You must be deaf, dumb or something in the middle. I thought I made myself clear I don't want you near me" Bonnie said irritated. This was becoming infuriating, why did he have to be this stubborn?

"Actually I really don't care about what you want because I need your help with a problem bigger than what you want." He answered also getting exasperated. He wished to have a civil conversation, but she had the impeccable ability to irritate him.

"Good that makes two of us with problems. Why the fuck would I want to help you fix yours when I have a decent amount of my own. Look, you seem rich enough to fix anything wrong in your life. So get your kid and leave me alone. I won't repeat myself." She said holding off shouting because she still needed to conserve her job.

"Wow you are some selfish bitch, your daughter needs you and you don't even want to know why." Damon said consternate, he could not believe this woman. Did she not have any maternal instinct? She barely cared to ask about Leila yesterday even after he showed her sitting in the car. "You did not even attempt to meet her, she was five meters from you and you just turned your back on her."

Bonnie looked around the room to see if the little girl was there, but she could not find her. Panic invaded her and she became furious with Damon "did you bring her here hoping I might be convinced, let me tell you something I really don't care" she spat another lie hoping it would be enough to get him to leave her alone, but it only infuriated Damon who was now standing very close to her almost stealing all the air from her. He was completely in her personal space, eyes burning with an azure fire.

"Luckily no, she is at home with my brother. I don't even want her to meet you; she already has a crappy mother, she does not need another one. "

"So why you are here then? No don't tell me because like I said have problems of my own and I don't really care about yours." She said on the verge of tears, what was the point if he was not planning a reunion. Why was he messing with her life?

"Even if you don't care, you will listen because no one is asking you to play mommy dearest. All I am asking is for you to save the life of your child." He furiously said while staring at her with an anger she had never experienced directed at her, but her mind caught up.

"What about her life?" she asked finding concern filling her voice and she really did not know why she was asking. But she could not stop the worry slowly crawling through her.

"She has a progressive form of leukemia" he said with pain in his voice before pursuing, but he was stopped by Bonnie's timid voice.

"She has leukemia?" she asked to literally no one, but she felt the need to repeat that little part to process the information. "She is so young" she whispered to herself. She felt an unknown weight descend upon her and for the first time in six year she thought about the ten minutes she spent with her child and her little smile. The big blue eyes that looked like the ones staring at her now with concern as she was taking a seat and she felt the teardrops hit her hand. She was transported back to six years ago when they were taking a nameless baby from her room in exchange for a check.

"How bad is it?" she proceeded to ask.

* * *

 _ **Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter.**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thanks for the review and follow, here is chap 3. Hopefully you will like this chapter also. Review fav, follow and don't judge Bonnie too harshly because well she is only human and she had a hard time. She is holding grudges that she does not even know are there.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything, tvd is not mine or by now Bamon will be having baby number three.**_

 _ **This chapter was beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma and thank you so much. Lovelies please do check her story because she is just the superhero that saved you from unbearable mistakes**_

* * *

The pain killers were wearing off and her lower body felt like it had been torn apart. If she had to define the pain, she would say it was excruciating, but it was all worth it when she saw that little angel. She was so small in her little pink baby clothes. She was sleeping soundlessly when the nurse came and picked her up. Bonnie waved to the little creature and pain invaded her. The pain had nothing physical to it; it was pure and raw emotion.

She could not do it; she could not give her up. There was probably a way to fix this entire mess. She would just give back the ten thousand Euros they already gave her. She could not give up her baby. That was the only thing she knew, it was a certainty as soon as the nurse brought her to her room. It was a mistake, she was not supposed to meet the little girl, but no one seemed to have told the nurses or maybe they felt bad for her.

She was a teenaged girl freshly entering her seventeenth year; they probably thought she was giving her child up for adoption after an unwarranted pregnancy. But the truth was miles away; she was a teenager that had resolved to lie and subterfuge and now it was coming to bite her in her ass.

She regretted signing those papers, but at the time she agreed to this, it did not seem like a big deal. But it was a big deal, she was lost in another part of the world isolated from her family and the only support she had was the reason she was in trouble.

She had clung on to the wrong person because of her thirst for affection. She was a child so deprived of familial affection that it was sans difficulty she was induced to naive beliefs and felt compelled to love without a thought of reason.

Nine months ago she was getting inseminated by a fishy doctor in the back of a way fishier clinic and well, she hadn't really given it any thought. But she was assured that there was a way bigger agency behind it, but her case could not be managed through the normal routes.

The reasons behind the atypical way were: she was minor and she was not only selling her womb but she was also selling her ovule. At the time she did not care at all because whatever, she was getting the money; she needed to get him out of trouble. She needed to save him, her hero complex would be the death of her and this had proven itself to be true.

But now that she had seen the fruit of her womb, she did care and she was not capable of going through it, she would tell him they could not take her baby from her. She tried to make sense of everything. She turned in every direction on her bed and still felt uncomfortable.

She wished she could walk so she could pace until the content of her heart. But she was lying on a hospital bed and the morphine was losing its potency and her legs felt like gum, she doubted she could support herself.

* * *

Giving birth had been painful, but it anchored her to reality washing away her little fantasy. What at seemed like a practical plan was now inconsistent because some blue eyes had met her green ones.

Maybe it was the pain making her emotional and that was why she was incapable of letting go, but she knew better. She was about to tear up and she needed to talk to someone who could understand. Her mom, she had birthed someone, she could understand.

She called her not caring about the time difference and hoping she would pick up the call. But in typical Abby Bennett style she sent the call to voicemail. Once again her mother failed her in a critical time. She felt lost and alone. Seventeen in a troubled situation and no one to turn to except another teenager.

Bonnie became nervous, but she never lost her resolve. She would go home with her little girl. A knock at her door let her know there was someone there. She signaled that they could come in. She hoped it was the nurse coming back with her baby girl, but it was only him.

The reason she was even laying in this bed to start with. He had a boyish grin and seemed happy. She looked at him and frowned. He walked toward her and kissed her, but she shrugged away. She wanted to push that asshole. She had to come to the hospital alone and went into labor without anyone by her side.

"You don't seem happy to see me" he said with a tone where vexation installed itself. He looked at her questioning her attitude.

"Why should I be happy, where were you? I called a thousand times." She said furiously, she was left alone pregnant in a crappy apartment and his ass was probably hanging with the wrong people again. When would he learn? Why was she insisting in staying with him? Maybe because he was the only piece of home left after Lucy took off to France leaving her behind in Italy.

"Hey I could not know you would be giving birth. I needed a fix and you know how it is." He said nonchalantly. He looked at her like she was wrong for even asking. She knew he was not the dad so why did he have to stick around or even be there when she gave birth.

"I know how it is _real_ well. That is how I ended up in this mess." She said harshly showing her body with her hands. He couldn't be serious. She wanted to shout at him or even throw the closest object she could find, but she had no energy.

"You want start with this again. Anyway it is done, we can move on with our lives. They will get the money we owe them and with the rest we will finally leave this shitty country. So cheer up babe." He said exasperated, she could not keep up with this story. What if he messed up? No one had asked her to help, could she blame him for the way she loved him. No! So what if he took advantage of her naivety and convinced her to go through this little scheme.

She looked at him hesitantly. He had told her she could do it and it was an easy way to make money. They could afford a place and fix shit up if she did this. What would nine months mean in a life time. And she could just give a child away. She looked at him, she should have known.

* * *

He was a liar, but she was seventeen and she loved his lying self as only the youth knew how, stupidly with fantasies of eternal and epic love. He loved her, she could feel it, but they were foolish to believe she would be immune to maternal feelings. He was a man, why did she listen to him about maternity?

"I won't give her away" she said timid and so low that he did not hear to what she said or he acted like he did not at least.

"Hun, did you say something?" he asked calmly

"I am not giving my daughter to anyone, give the money back. I won't take the money left." She stuttered, her tongue faltering on every word that she said unsurely, but this time he heard clearly and paused whatever he was doing. And when he paused she sat up trying to look imposing, to show how much she was not about to be coerced into doing anything.

He laughed and looked at her like she was insane. He grabbed her IV. "Are you high on morphine babe, you can't be serious. You know we need this money. We can't play with those people."

" _You_ need that money, not me, this is your mess. I don't have anything to do with that shit." she shouted and could not believe the words coming out of her mouth. She was being selfish making a choice conformed to her needs. And she was not the only one surprised, he was also in shock.

"Oh you made it your mess when you vouched for me, and what? You would just let them kill me for a child you did not want at all before today. You would throw our entire plan away. They will come for us both. Bon you can do this. How are you planning to even take care of the kid?" He argued with her reminding her of the mess she had landed in.

"I don't care; I won't give my child up. I am going to talk to my parents. Shit I will figure it out." She responded unconfident, but she had her mind set and focused.

"Your parents, they can't even take care of you, a year and their daughter ain't given them a good reason as to why she is gone and they're still not bothered enough to come look for you. You are too broke to leave Florence, but you want to be dramatic. She is not your child get that into your head and get what is left because we don't have enough money to deal with more issues. The father of that thing is rich and will give her what she deserves. You can't offer her shit." He said harshly

* * *

She listened to his harsh words and did not know where to start. He had told her the truth; he had thrown her own complaints about her family in her face. Used her words against her and her resolve faltered, but she still did not want to give her little angel up.

She did not care how, but she would figure this thing out. She was about to say that when a knock at her door broke their argument. The nurse that had brought the baby earlier came in her room.

"Would you want to say bye to your baby. I know I am not supposed to, but I thought you might want to. Her parents came to pick her up, but I can sneak you in for few minutes." She said with a smile filled with pity.

Bonnie just nodded, her words dying in her throat. She had to stop them and tell them she changed her mind. The nurse helped her into a wheel chair, leading her toward the nursery and he followed behind them. She arrived and they were standing in front of her; a young brunette couple. She looked at them and he was right, they were rich.

She did not have a full view of the woman, but the man was handsome, like classic handsome. He had dark hair and when he looked towards her direction, her heart stopped; his eyes were so blue, they were her daughter's eyes. She swallowed a sob and he gave her a little encouraging smile thinking she was a patient recovering from something. He was miles away from to thinking she was the woman that had given birth to his daughter.

The woman next to him laughed and he moved his attention back to his family. She wanted to go get her daughter, but her boyfriend put a hand on her shoulder and whispered "that is what she deserves. We deserved other things. You will be fine I promise." Another lie, she should have known.

She looked at the little family and that day her daughter became another woman's daughter. Ten minutes observing strangers from a corner and seeing her child becoming a stranger too. She waved at her baby and went back to her hospital room. She was still living in Italy a week later and erasing anything related to her nameless baby.

* * *

Mystic falls 2016

"She has leukemia?" she asked to literally no one, but she felt the need to repeat that little part to process the information. "She is so young" she whispered to herself. She felt an unknown weight descend upon her and for the first time in six years, she thought about the ten minutes she spent with her child and her little smile. The big blue eyes that looked like the ones staring at her now with concern as she took a seat and she felt teardrops hit her hand. And she was transported six years ago when they were taking a nameless baby from her room in exchange of a check.

"How bad is it?" she succeeded in asking. She passed her hand through her hair and her breathing became a bit heavy, but she wanted to focus and listen to what was going on with her baby.

He took a chaise opposition to her and saw it as his opportunity to say everything. She was finally open to what he had to say. He took a deep breath and asked another waiter to bring the glass of bourbon then asked her what she wanted. She absent mindedly asked for a cup of coffee, black; she needed the bitter taste and something to wake her up from whatever state this was.

When the drinks were brought, she took a big gulp of the hot drink burning her tongue, but it was enough to get her to focus. She sat straight and he drank a sip of his bourbon eventually answering her question.

"It is bad enough that have to cross an ocean to find a stranger. Yesterday her oncologist told me they found teardrop cells in her blood sample. Teardrop cells, isn't that ironic." He said taking another sip of his drink. Talking about Leila's state was not the easiest thing for him however many timed he did it. He smirked, but when he raised his eyes out of his glass he met her eyes.

She sighed. "I am paid by the hour and I'm on the clock, so if you could get straight to the point" She said irritated. She did not want to make small talk with him. Her boss would probably cut this hour from her paycheck and now more than ever every dollar counted. But she needed to know what was going on with the little girl with the beautiful hair; that was how she referred to Leila refusing to even put a name on the being.

"Sorry, well she used to have the lymphocytic type which meant she could be treated by chemotherapy, but they found cells looking like teardrops which indicated that she had progressed to another stage. The myelocytic leukemia type which means her disease has spread to her bone marrow." He explained before finishing his bourbon with a one last swig.

* * *

He was saying a ton of words, but he really did not know half the meanings behind them and however many times Doctor Fell explained everything, he just wondered what it meant concretely when it applied to his daughter's health. She seemed to be having the exact same problem.

"Concretely what does that mean?" She asked exasperated by the way he used his words. The way he was stirring the entire conversation was annoying her. She did not know why she was listening to him anyway. She had killed all of her humanity and kindness, she had learned her lesson.

"That she will be in a great deal pain before dying if we don't find her a bone marrow match, I'm not compatible and you are her other parent so you are the one I have to turn to." He finished and looked at her waiting for her answer.

She looked at him and compared to when she had learned the news of the child's disease, she was composed. She cleaned her face, wiped her tears and put her impassible mask back. Saying that she was touched internally was a euphemism, but at the point she was in her life, her priorities were elsewhere. Bonnie Bennett the superhero captain saves everyone was long dead.

She thought about everything that mattered to her that had been on the back burner for things that mattered for everyone else in her life. And now she was taking care of her grams while her dad was leaving selfishly and her mother was on some random island with a new husband, she had lost count after number four. People were selfish around her. They all had a piece of the cake and she ended up with the crumbs.

She had to abandon her dream for a year with Grams' disease and what would she have left to give for a stranger. She had no daughter in her eyes; she had been a mom ten minutes, no more, no less. Would you give bone marrow to a stranger risking everything? No! Helping everyone just ruined her life. She was twenty four years old, in debt and struggling in life.

She needed a stable job and having to go through a surgery wasn't one of her priorities. Was she picking the wrong time to be selfish? Well maybe, but did she need to be selfish? Undoubtedly yes, but probably not now.

* * *

"There is donor list and if you could pay to get her the first time. You can do it a second time and nothing guarantees I am compatible. So stop wasting your time on me. I told you I have problems of my own." She said fighting her stronger instinct. She stood, walking toward him, putting her hand on his cheek stroking softly. She kissed his cheek gently as her way of apologizing.

"Take care of her. She is your daughter not mine. I can't give up my life for anyone. I have dreams of my own and people to take care of " she walked away not looking back, her heart was racing and begging her to go back and just give up a bit more. It was her daughter and she was conflicted, talking to herself about what was right.

But her mind made sure to align and shed light on the trouble she was in. She had to take a year off from Juilliard after she killed herself trying to enter to the school; she recently lost her scholarship because of the mess going on in her life. And she had to take a break from her dance courses, the only reason she has been pushing through life.

She did not know if she could afford her dream. Bonnie Bennett forever sacrificing her for others' profit and her never gained anything. She did not know how to do it anymore. She did not have it in her anymore.

A surgical operation might just be another year away from her dream, another little death and she needed to work to pay the mortgage on the house, and the student loan she had to inevitably take. She had given up her daughter long ago, sacrifice upon sacrifice, not this time. She walked back to the bar and pulled her hair up. She put her smile back on and avoided the table where Damon was sitting. She had to go through her shift still.

Damon looked back at her, his hand lingered on his cheek. What was wrong with this woman? How could she just switch off whatever she felt as a mother? He knew she could not be that cold and cruel, he had seen her break down when he said Leila had a cancer.

But somehow she just closed herself off again. Maybe he should do what she asked and abandon this whole plan. She was set on not participating. She did not care. He should have known that she was selfish. Who had the strength to give a kid away, but again he always saw her as a savior before.

But somehow she looked so broken and the green of her eyes had faltered. Doctor Fell had said a year that was how long they could maintain Leila's treatment before a transplant became unavoidable. They could put her on the donor list, but it might take years. Of course she was a priority because she was a child but still bone marrow was not easy to come across.

* * *

He threw one last defeated look at the room; he had no idea how to get past this obstacle. He left the cafe and drove to the hotel were Stefan and Leila where waiting for him. Bonnie was happy to see that he had left. She released the breath she was holding and did her best to make it through her shift.

On his way to the hotel Damon received a call from his secretary; she had the file the detective had compiled on Bonnie but at this point he did not know if he really needed it. The woman was set on being unhelpful, but he still asked to have it delivered in his hotel room.

He still wanted to understand how a woman could be so sensitive one second and turn cold the next second. She feigned her coldness, he was sure of it. When he was talking with her he felt that she wanted to comfort him and had to fight her natural instinct to not do so, her hands would move toward him and she would forcefully pull them back.

And the kiss she gave him, he really did not understand why, but he felt kindness at that moment. She did it so sweetly letting her soft lips caress his cheek. She had pressed on his shoulder as to comfort him and apologize. When she said "take care of her", her tone seemed apologetic, even her eyes were, but maybe he just wanted to humanize her.

He finally arrived to his hotel room where he found Leila asleep curled on the sofa with the TV on cartoon network; she must have fallen asleep recently. In the other part of the room Stefan was nursing a glass of bourbon. He walked toward him and took a tumbler from the mini bar and poured himself a bit of bourbon draining it in one gulp.

"It went that bad" Stefan said sipping his drink calmly knowing his niece's biological mother had probably once again said no.

"That woman is colder than I thought." he said and walked toward the sofa where Leila was laying. He sat near her and put her head on his lap. He was relieved to notice that this was at least still a highlight of the day. /

He looked at Stefan wondering why she was sleeping so early, but he did not ask having a little bit of an idea of why. She probably was tired after her drug cocktails and would be up soon to get more pills. He sighed in frustration and tried to change her position to a more comfortable one.

"She is napping because she has been running around. So she got tired, well even I am tired." Stefan said trying to reassure his elder brother who since his daughter had been diagnosed had turned into the family brooder.

"Ah, I am glad she had a good day at least" Damon said really appreciative of the days his daughter could act like other kids and play. She was exhausted for a good reason, he was glad.

"Was it that bad meeting with her biologic mother, what happened?" The youngest Salvatore asked curious about this woman. They had talked a bit about her yesterday, but not much.

"Well the woman told me on different occasions that she did not give a damn about what happen to Leila. She claimed to have problems of her own." He said bitter and nursing a second glass of bourbon feeling his anger built again. What could be more important than a child?

"So what are you going to do? You can't just let it slide." Stefan asked worried, Leila was as much his daughter as she was Damon and more since Rose had reduced her presence in the little girl's life. Therefore knowing they might lose her weighed heavily on him too.

"Well she told me to fuck off, what I am supposed to do? Be more persistent or wait until she's solved her own problems" he said completely frustrated and getting angry with the wrong person.

"She told you, she had her own problems, maybe you should consider the matter with a distant approach and fix what really needs to be fixed." The green eyed man said not backing away because Damon had raised his voice a bit.

He grabbed a big envelope from the table and threw it at Damon "your office sent this and I have taken a look, maybe you could use it. If she won't voluntary give it, then take it. Salvatore's never play nice and we won't start today."

* * *

Bonnie hated her bus ride; it took too much time and gave her a large amount of time to think. Thinking never did anything good for her. She left the bus feeling guilty and she wanted to burry herself in her bed sheets.

It looked like she would spend another night locked in her room crying about the past and present situation in her life. On the bus she had changed her mind a bunch of times. She was so uncertain about what to do. She had looked in her bag for Damon's card, but remembered she did not even give him time to say his name.

She had wanted to call him and ask what he needed her to do. Her old self would not let her walk away like her baby girl was not in need of her, but then she felt anger; she had no right to call herself her mom. So the further she stayed from this mess the better for everyone.

Guilt was oozing from every pore of her skin; she could not reconcile the reason of her mind with her conscious. From whatever point she stood, her selfishness was killing her. This was her daughter not just a little girl. What kind of human was she? She spent an hour asking herself that question.

She tried to see a way of compromising. What would it cost if she took another year away from her studies? And the little selfish voice in her head was telling her that was another year close to the end of her dream. No more dance company, soon old enough to be replaced by a newbie. She needed to learn and understand from her previous mistakes. She swallowed hard and walked with her head down, kicking rocks to express her anger and frustration.

She passed a sports car and barely noticed, too taken by her own thoughts filled with doubt and confusion. His voice startled her and she jumped screaming with the whole capacity of her lungs. She calmed down and looked at the man sitting on her porch. She looked at him angrily and walked past him. She tried to look inside her house to see if her grams was there. She hoped he did not meet her because that would lead to a series of questions.

* * *

She grabbed his hand and to his biggest surprised she pulled him away from her house. She looked at him and she had to appreciate his tenacity, but if it was her daughter she would do the same. She barely understood how it was possible, but she felt a distance from Leila. For mixed reasons she did not have the strength to associate her with this Bonnie.

Leila was her daughter, but the daughter of the young innocent seventeen year old girl that went to explore the world, but ended up swallowed by it. Thinking about Leila, she looked in the car and saw no one. She relaxed a bit. She could not fathom the idea seeing her. The little girl meant too much.

Leila marked the end of her innocence and she regretted it. When she judged that she was at a safe distance, she released his hand and almost shouted at him in the middle of the street, but she knew better, a fair amount of people knew her grams and gossip ran fast.

She took a deep breath; she would not do this again with him. She was about to walk away, but Damon boldly stopped her. He had to do this, Stefan was right. He had hoped she would have a heart, but he still could use other techniques.

"If I fixed all your problems would you do it?" He asked; he intended to go back with her agreeing on doing anything to save his daughter.

"And how would you do that? You want to play fairy god mother." She asked making a mockery of his attempt. She had been in this mess for a couple years and he wanted to fix things he did not know anything about. How? By just snapping his fingers.

"Your mortgage, the hospital bills piling up and your student loan; I can clear anything, money has never been an issue for me." He said confidently and stood taller than he was. He hoped this time she would give in.

"And what part of my soul I would have to sell this time, the last time with twenty thousand Euros you took the most valuable piece of it and made a child grow out of her innocence. No thanks." She said focusing on getting away. She did not need this in her life and from what he was telling her; the man was stalking her and had looked into her life, so she better run.

"If that was true, you would have rushed at the opportunity to save her. You were happy to take the twenty thousand. Why would money repulse you now? Then what do you want? I will give it to you because I won't take no for answer and if you keep insisting, I won't be generous while bending you to my will. So choose while I am still in a caring enough mood." He said sounding desperate at the beginning but remembering he could tear her whole world apart.

She could read conviction in his voice and after all, what was the point in resisting. If she had his phone number on the bus, she would have called him anyway.

"I have terms and conditions if I have to get into this." She said looking at him and waiting for Damon's reaction, she needed to make something clear from start

"I'll meet them, just say the word."

"I don't want to be her mother; I don't deserve to be her mother. Promise me you won't let it happen." She said solemnly looking at him oddly. He extended his hand and she took it.

* * *

 _ **Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thanks for the review and follow, here is chap 4. Hopefully you will like this chapter also. Review fav, follow and maybe some will understand bonnie and her way to deal with the situation because a lot of you are saying that Leila is just a child therefore Bonnie should be more caring. She is holding grudges that she does not even know are there and feeling that need to be dealt with.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything, tvd is not mine or by now Bamon will be having baby number three.**_

 _ **This chapter was beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma and thank you so much. Lovelies please do check her story because she is just the superhero that saved you from unbearable mistakes**_

* * *

 _Breathe Bonnie, just breathe don't stop. You have to_ run she was telling herself. They were in a really bad situation. She looked behind and finally there was no sign of them. They might have finally escaped. She felt all her stamina vanish and she stopped running. She was tired and her heart was still beating erratically. She put her hand on her chest and started coughing. It was hard to breath. She felt his hands on her shoulder and she lost it. She angrily glanced at him and violently slapped them away.

"What was that all about?" she painfully yelled, she was still having difficulties to fully draw air into her lungs. She had just run miles in her pajama trying to escape a group of men she did not know.

"Just calm down Bon. I need to think" He said with heavy breathing sounds escaping his throat overtaking the sound of his voice. He eventually tried to regulate his breathing, but he failed, still too scared to get his heart to slow down.

"Don't tell me to calm down after that, I have just been forced to escape from my hotel room at freaking 4 o'clock in the morning." She yelled once more and dropped on the floor. Her legs were in pain and tired from their early sprint. "What was that all about?" she repeated her question.

For a second he looked at her and kept quiet. He needed to think, he was in a lot of trouble and having Bonnie yelling at him was not helping. He once more looked at her, sat in the spot next to her and leaned on the white wall behind them. They were in a small dark alley trying to hide from whoever was after them.

"I messed up Bon, like big time messed up" he said and put his head on her shoulder. She looked at him consternate and also blasé. This was his line I messed up _, when are you not_ _messing_ _up_ she wondered, but said nothing. She kept quiet and waited for him to continue.

"I am sorry, I told you I would stop but I lied. I was running short and shit this time it was big." He pursued disoriented. He started tearing up and she squeezed his hand showing her support. She breathed deeply and inhaled the early morning's fresh air; it could not be that bad. Was he back to gambling or was he back to using heroine. She really did not know but it could not be worse than the other times. She grabbed his face and made him face her.

"What is it this time and how can we fix it?" She asked always willing to help. So young but always there to carry the world's burden, she was always fighting others' battles. She had been enabling his antics for far too long to know where and when to stop. In the beginning she was covering his drug addiction, later she was helping him every time he went to rehab then it became him betting his money and hers. He had promise to quit and she had believed him. And now they were sitting on the ground and still she was willing to help.

* * *

Let's go on a trip and use it as a new start. She was mad at him but it could wait, now he needed her help.

"I owe some shady and dangerous people a bunch of money. And they are the kind to get their money back" he continued still crying on her shoulder.

"How much?" she simply asked

"Twenty five thousand dollars!" He replied. His voice was barely distinctive and he was staring at her. She looked around tired and disappointed _so this time it was gambling._

"You know we don't have it, even if we decide to use the money left it won't be enough, but we still can get the fuck out of here. Go back home and we can change the date on the plane tickets." She told him. Their finances were not amazing; they were teenagers on a trip and had spent way too much. Since Lucy had left for Paris it had become worse.

"We can't go back home" he said depicted. She looked at him and she could not understand. So he pursued "I don't have our passports, I used them as a gage" he stuttered the last part.

"Are you a freaking fool? What the fuck goes through your mind when you do things like this." She said before she slapped him and managed to stand. Her head started to spin and she was sweating.

"Sorry, I am really sorry" he muttered and looked at his feet. She looked at his depicted features and the tears he shed undid her, after all, they were in this trouble together. They always have been.

"So what we do now?" she asked taking her spot back on the floor.

"We hide 'til we can find a way to get their money, I don't know."

A noise echoed around and Bonnie turned her focus to it, it was distant but still audible.

"Ring, ring."

* * *

She was pulled out of her dream by her alarm clock. She moved her hand slightly to stop it and stared at her roof. This day was starting awful. She had not dreamt or even remembered anything about the events that had led or were related to her surrogacy since she stepped out of the depression she suffered from.

This is messed up; I am just making another mistake. She thought. She lay on her bed for few more minutes; she was not feeling up for what was coming next. But she had promised she would help and she needed the money. Money in Bonnie's life was definitely the root of all evil. Her life had been for far too long centered on her need for money. _Get some money so your boyfriend is not killed by a group of Italian mobsters_ ; _get some money so you don't have to end up on the streets with your Grams._ If money was the problem Damon Salvatore definitively was the solution it seemed.

She moved her bed sheets away and stood. She grabbed her towel and glanced at the clock, she still had four hours before she had to meet the man. She really did not want to go through with anything related with Damon, but even if money was not involved, there was still little Leila. Thinking about that little girl had become Bonnie's way of tormenting herself. When she did not feel remorse for abandoning her, she felt anger and resentment. It all started with her and the blue eyes she would always remember.

Bonnie grabbed her phone and looked for Damon's number; he had given it to her yesterday after she had agreed on helping in exchange for financial compensation. She was supposed to meet him so they could go to the curly hair princess' oncologist.

She was not pleased with the idea of going in his company, but the oncologist was located in Atlanta. She would have taken a bus, but time was her most precious resource therefore she had no choice. She had a night shift as a waitress in a bar and needed to make sure to be there on time. So he was the safest option.

"Mystic Falls Communal Dance Center, at 10a.m, please don't be late and don't bring her." she sent the message to him, but did not wait for his answer. She walked inside her bathroom, checked the bags settling under her eyes and she sighed. This situation was taking a toll on her life; she jumped in her shower readying herself for the day.

/

Damon and Stefan were arguing about the most balanced breakfast for Leila while the little girl was only laughing at the arguments advanced by each of them. That was how the mornings were for her. Her uncle and her dad taking hours to decide what she should eat, but in the end she barely ate anything. She sat in the middle of both men on the kitchen stool and waited whilst both turned to her so she could break the tie by choosing. She pointed at Stefan, she always chose Stefan.

"You are supposed to choose me, I am your dad little rascal" Damon complained being a sour loser.

"You can't cook and Uncle Stefan can" she answered bluntly, but she was just being logical Damon could not boil an egg without having something go wrong. The young man frowned, feigning vexation. She looked at him and shrugged.

"Ain't you a clever one cara?" Stefan kissed her temple and gave her a bright smile, she smiled back.

"Well this clever girl needs to take her pills right now." Damon took her from the stool and placed her on his waist. She looked at him disappointed and rolled her eyes. She hated those pills they made her feel so bad. She would feel nauseous, dizzy and tired. She wanted to play outside, but with her treatment it was getting impossible.

He seated her on the couch and went to pick up the bag containing all sorts of drugs. The bag was pretty big and by the time they would be done with the morning pills, Stefan would probably be done with her breakfast. But it would probably go to waste. The part of it that she would manage to eat would be regurgitated sometime during the day.

He looked at her and she was facing him as brave as she could be, he sometime found his bravery in her eyes. Mostly now that everything was so complicated, but somehow she managed to see everything so simply. He remembered explaining to her that she was sick and that had been an awful day. He could not have done it alone; Stefan was there to remind him to not cry because it would frighten her. He had told her she was sick and she had told him not to worry because she knew Uncle Stefan and him would fix what was wrong.

So now that was what he was trying to do, fix what was wrong. He started giving her the pills arranging them by color from the brightest to the simple white ones. She liked it that way, the white first because they tasted awfully bad and the colorful one because even though they tasted bad they were pretty.

He was going through the arrangement when his phone rang and it was Bonnie Bennett. She had sent him a text. He read through it and felt anger build and anchor itself into him like a well rooted tree. What has she done to her? He thought. Yet another woman that refused to have any contact with his daughter, as if Rose was not enough. He took note of the place and the hour before throwing his phone on the sofa.

Stefan was finally done with breakfast and Leila was doing her best to eat the maximum portion of the blueberry pancakes on her plate that she could manage to and the fruit salad Damon half convinced his brother to make. The young man with the auburn hair joined his elder brother and, as it had become a habit, the brunette was nursing a glass of bourbon a little too early for his younger brother's taste.

* * *

"You are turning into an alcoholic" Stefan said disapproving of the elder Salvatore.

"Cut me some slack. I have decent reasons to become one." He wiggled his eyebrows and took a sip before raising his glass.

"Yeah me too but here I am." Stefan countered waiting for his brother to drop the glass which he did after draining it completely.

"Well when you have a bitchy ex-wife who thinks that now she has children of her own, she can just forget about your child. We will consider getting more Bourbon or when you have the mother of your child making you pay for a piece of bone marrow. I will pour the glass for you and the cherry on top, having the love of your life dying, believe me alcoholism is mild in the sea of my issues." Damon whispered worried his daughter could hear him and took the bottle of bourbon back to the mini bar.

"Well first you can stop the overall drama queen act because Leila is definitely not going anywhere, so just shut up about it and be glad this miss Bennett at least said yes." He chastised his brother; he could not bear the idea of his niece dying and didn't want to hear anything about it.

"She said yes, but wants nothing to do with Leila, what is wrong with all these women. Don't they know how amazing my daughter is? "

"Well I am glad she wants nothing to do with Leila. Do you want to risk another Rose? Our principessa is fine with the both of us and that should be enough. Imagine if she becomes greedy and wants to take Leila away. For once I am glad we won't have that." Stefan reasoned and finally Damon agreed. He never considered all of those options. He was happy at least his brother could have the lucidity to think ahead.

"Well can you keep an eye on Leila, I have to meet up with Miss Bennett and she asked for her absence." Damon asked mentioning the message.

"No I can't but surely my secretary or yours can manage" Stefan said while leaving the room and grabbing his suit's jacket.

* * *

Bonnie missed the peace that came with every movement she executed perfectly. Dance was her life. A dance stage was the place where she always wanted to be, she wanted the light and the crowd while her body was communicating with the music. But she was stuck in a small town taking care of her Grams. Don't get her wrong, her grandmother was the only person that really mattered in her life, but putting her dream aside was not an easy thing to do.

She adored dancing, feeling her body answering to each change of percussion in the symphony with dexterity. She was grace and fluidity on a stage; she could execute any movement with the fluidity of a raindrop landing on a leaf.

She was always a flutter on a musical note. She wanted to be a prima ballerina and go around the world. But with everything happening in her life, this dream was becoming more of a mirage when only a year ago she had integrated into a corps de ballet.

Bonnie was an excellent dancer and few had her talent, grace and aplomb. But all of that might not be enough if she stayed away from professional ballet longer. She looked around the room with anger. She was stuck and had no other place to practice. The other girls who were competing with her where studying and learning in better conditions. She felt a surge of revolt, but mostly she felt resentment. Right now she was resentful of everyone in her life and she was using dance as a way of channeling her frustration.

Damon arrived at the hour indicated by Bonnie and looked for her outside, but he found no one. He could not believe her, she had insisted on the fact that he could not be late, but she was late. He left his car and entered the training room. She was so absorbed into her choreography that she did not notice him.

She was in the middle of executing a grand jeté when he saw her. He stopped and looked at her in awe. She was as graceful as a swan, her points were perfectly extended and her hands were in perfect alignment. Her midair split was remarkably done and the landing was divine. She directly followed with a fouetté turn and her rotations were just elegant. Her port de tete was wonderful. Seeing her moving was as beautiful as seeing a butterfly step on water. She pursued with an arabesque. Her movements were so fluid and defined.

He had never seen such gracefulness embodied into one person. He had attended few ballet performances and she had nothing to envy from the dancer he had seen. She happened to just be as graceful and beautiful. She was extremely beautiful, that was the first thing he noticed the first day he met her. Now in this context it was just pronounced, she was airily beautiful and delicate. He had his breath taken away.

* * *

And the smile she had during the whole performance was enchanting. She finished and she was so beautiful. It took no time for her to notice him. He was clapping, he could not stop himself. She looked at him and her smile faded. She grabbed a bottle of water, drank it and sat on the floor to rest.

Here comes the devil she thought, she grabbed her towel and wiped herself. She pulled her sweat pants on her body and undid her bun. She eventually stood and checked her watch. She was late, she walked toward him and when she reached his level she stopped.

"Sorry" she apologized for being late and passed him; she reached the door and opened it to leave while she was tying her hair up.

"Don't be, it was an impressive performance. And now I know where Leila's passion for ballet comes from." He said remembering how his daughter always used to drag him and Rose to those performance in Florence when she was healthy. She even attended class, _but now well now she had leukemia_. He thought but said nothing.

At the mention of the little girl Bonnie lost all taste for small talk. If the small talks would turn to the curly hair princess, silence would be ideal. She continued walking without saying anything and put order in her backpack. She did not need to know more about a stranger who was already haunting her nights.

He reached her and directed her toward his car. Today he opted for a different car and it was just as fancy as the previous one. She looked at it and rolled her eyes. _Well at least_ _you know you will get your money on_ _time_. She thought and it was a bit of a consolation. She looked at him waiting for him to unlock the car.

When he did, he walked to her side to open the door. Once she attempted to get inside a little silhouette caught her attention and she stopped. She felt her anger grow and she looked at him angrily.

"I was clear about this. I told you didn't I?" she said pointing toward the small body rolled around itself and sleeping. She closed the door and took two steps back.

He looked at her, trying to understand what she was talking about and remembered that he had not left Leila to the secretary. But earlier she had started coughing blood. Therefore he was worried and did not believe it would be wise to leave her with anyone.

"You know she does not bite." He said a bit irritated "nor is she contagious. So why is that you are trying to avoid her like the plague?"

She glanced at him and did not answer. She had to get out of here really fast. Her heart was already pumping. She turned around and started walking away. Fuck it, _Bennett just_ _try_. _She is asleep nothing can happen_. She told herself but she could not. She was already running away from her past and one look at her curls had changed her life and disturbed the little bit of peace she had succeeded to find. In three days she had talked to people she had cut out of her life. She had remembered the dark times of her life and what would be next, another depression.

* * *

Damon saw her leaving and ran after her. He caught up with her and grabbed her arm to stop her. She violently turned to stare at him, but rather than the anger she wanted to convey, it was fragility and distress that appeared.

He looked at her with rage and anger. At the moment she was no different from Rose who ran away at the first difficulties, but somehow she was worse because she was running away from his little angel like she was an infectious disease. He yanked her back, so she was now fully facing him and the space between them was almost nonexistent.

He stared right into her eyes trying to figure out something that was above his understanding. But whatever he could have come up with would have never scrubbed half of the truth behind her actions and feelings. She looked back at him with defiance and she was not backing down from the staring contest. She was in her right to refuse to have any contact with the little girl.

"Is there something wrong with her that she has all of you running away? Is there something that I don't see? Is there something I can't understand, what is wrong with her?" he finally asked with a depicted voice.

He could not simply understand the women linked to his daughter's life. First it had been Rose who was limiting their contact to only phone calls. It seemed like she was doing her best to ignore her own daughter. And now there was this stranger and he knew he might be asking a lot from her, but never on earth had he imagined such reaction from her.

"She is an adorable little girl. She likes ballet like you, but can't practice. She has no friends because she is always tired. She smiles through everything and when I say everything I intend the worst life can throw at her. Her mom leaving, her cancer, when she can't walk out of her bed because she feels like her bones are melting because of the excruciating pain." He stopped to take a deep breath and cleared the lump forming in his throat.

"When 10 inch needles are used to puncture her bones, she smiles. When she is terrified because blood is leaking from her nose, she smiles because that's all she knows how to do. So what is so wrong with her that her supposed mothers can't stand her? Is she broken in your eyes? What has she done to you that she deserves your hatred and your selfishness?" He pursued while his anger was turning into overwhelming fury. He looked deep into her eyes and all he could see was repressed anger and very fragile control. She felt compelled to listen without giving grief of her own. She just had to listen so she did just that.

She stopped and all she could do was have tears freely flowing. She did not know where she could find the answers to his questions because some of those questions were not address to her. At the instant she was the catalyst of his anger and it had an impact on her.

* * *

She felt like she was pushed against the wall. Words were knocking each other over to come out of her mouth. No words seemed right enough to express what she felt and where she was coming from, but silence would not suffice. She steadied herself. She had to tell someone even if it was a stranger.

"Less than half an hour, that was all she needed to destroy my life. Freaking thirty minutes, a smile and my life went from shitty to awful. After you left with her I roamed the hospital corridor for hours, helpless and thousands of questions crossed my mind. Are they good people? Is she hungry? Am I that awful, am I a monster?" she stopped to look at him and to see if he understood half of the hell she went through. If he could feel half of the pain she endured, but how could he, their daughter was there to brighten his life.

"Do you remember the first time you held her? I remember that day like yesterday her heartbeat was so shallow. It took her four seconds to take her first breath; I was so worried until she cried. I spent two years of my life mourning her and she was no one at the time, she had no name. She was a pair of beautiful blue eyes, a giggle, thirty minutes of my life, but thirty minutes with the love of my life and a shadow that I hated for the 6 years that followed because it was easier, because if it was not her I had to hate myself." She was now fighting for every breath, but she was also embarrassed by her tears.

She was doing her best to fight the torrent of tears, but all she was doing was looking more tormented. She stopped and she was wheezing. She took steps away from him when his grip on her loosened up. She glanced at him and stopped her eyes at the length of his. Blue met green, and there was compassion in his blue irises, but she hated compassion, it was never far away from pity.

She drew another deep breath and slowly blew air from her mouth. She undid her bun and ran her shaky fingers through her hair. She was fighting to find countenance and calmed herself. She was not one to go through the process of expressing such feelings.

She had no one to talk to when the subject of Leila was an issue. She went through her depression alone and only mentioned her daughter during séance with difficulty. She had learned to repress herself. But today it seemed she was incapable to do so. Having someone accusing her of hating the little girl had brought up indignation and the need to justify her actions.

"You are asking me what is wrong with her. Nothing is wrong with her! You think I am running away? You think I hate her? She is the only precious thing that I wanted to keep for myself. But lucky for you even then I was stupid, but now I am not that naive. I am not scared of her, I am protecting her. She does not need me because; once again, there will be a time when I will have to leave her. So be better at your job as a father and stop bringing women who might hurt her in the future." She finished exhausted and ready to leave because now it was just hard to face him. She would reach the hospital using a bus.

* * *

He looked at her and did not know what would be the perfect answer to her tirade. He would be lying if he pretended to understand her. But her little idea about how to protect his daughter was not what he needed and he was as reticent as she was to let her be part of Leila's life.

But never had he thought she had to avoid Leila like she was doing right now. He used his thumbs to wipe away her tears. He grabbed her hand and led her toward the car. She made a little effort to stop his motion, but in a few seconds they were in front of the car door and he was opening it.

"Let me worry about the protecting, I did well before you and will continue doing so after you. I don't intended on forcing her on you or to even introduce you as more than a friend of mine to her. Don't worry; a few encounters won't change the fact that the only parent she has known is me. We did not need you before in her life and we won't need you later." That's all he said but his words did not bring the comfort she expected. She wanted a rupture from the little girl, but being near her would never be easy.

He helped her in and all she could do was to look at the backseat where the little girl looked uncomfortable in her sleeping position. She looked at him helpless and started to play with her fingers. She needed to do something because she was once again on the verge of tearing up. She tried to face the road but it was impossible. She turned to get the full view of her and she started worrying about her comfort. She was staring at Leila and when Damon entered the car he followed her eyes.

"She won't wake up right now; her pills knock her out for a bunch of hours, no need to be scared. You probably won't meet her now or even later." He said to her while getting behind the wheel. She got out of the car and he wondered what she was doing. This shit is getting annoying he thought, ready to go after her, but he stopped himself.

He observed as she climbed inside the backseat. She sat and pulled the little girl's head onto her lap. She was feeling uncomfortable touching Leila. It felt so unnatural, but seeing her so uncomfortable while sleeping was even more difficult.

"She looked uncomfortable and the road might make it worse." She said to Damon who was still looking at her with haggard eyes. This woman was just so hard to understand. Bonnie was feeling comfortable now that the possibility of talking to the little girl was removed, but she just contradicted her brain's will and went against all intelligence to steal a moment with her. It could not be that bad considering the past was already haunting her.

* * *

 _ **Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thanks for the reviews, favs and follows I wished I could update sooner but I have crazy schedules because guess what I am two years a way to have my MD and get a full residency but I am still an intern so medicine . Yeah now I have a chapter and this time I am letting look inside Damon's head because well the man is getting no love but he has reason to be like that.**_

 _ **Now I disclaim everything except I am still mad Bamon ain't have no babies in my screen**_

 _ **This chapter was beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma and thank you so much. Lovelies please do check her story because she is just the superhero that saved you from unbearable mistakes**_

* * *

The air was thick with tension and the silence was electrifying in the car. She tried to settle the head on her lap perfectly while she removed the hair covering Leila's face. Her hands stopped moving when the little girl face was revealed, she moved her eyes away and stopped them on Damon who was trying to act as if he was unconcerned by what was happening in the backseat of his car, but he could not help the worry consuming him but also the curiosity.

He tried to focus on the road but failed miserably. He was all ears on what was happening behind him, he was not really certain he wanted her that close of his little angel even if somehow he was begging the heavens that she could have more concern over the state of his daughter's health. But really this arrangement was a bit more complicated that he wished. Did he want another woman entering his daughter's life? No! But was it a firm No? That was the real question.

Guilt had been a big part of his life recently. He did not even know to what extent he was blaming himself, but there was a lot of blame to go around. It was stupid to think that anything happening with Leila was his fault, but somehow he wanted to shelter the blame just to rationalize everything. He needed to explain the mess her life had become. And when Rose decided to step out, he blamed himself even more and the first thing he thought was _**now I am also taking her mom away. How am I going to make up for this?**_

Damon and Rose's relationship had been broken long before Leila's sickness. Damon had been resentful toward his ex-wife so he had done what he did best; he acted vindictively and used his daughter as leverage. He had found a way to appropriate Leila and for a long time it had been a custody battle where his little girl had become nothing more than a tool for them to hurt each other; Damon had put an end to everything when he stopped long enough to see the effects his little vendetta had on his daughter.

At the time Leila was three and at three she needed a form of stability so he had reconsidered and put his pride aside so that Leila could have two parents. _But maybe I_ _had taken too much time and by that point Rose was done being her mother._ He had thought. Following their divorce Rose had remarried and also had a child of her own. Her little miracle child and maybe it was at the time, and then Leila became less her child more of Damon's child.

But really, the man could not tell but now that Leila needed her she had run in the opposite direction to the comfort of her family from which Leila seemed excluded from more and more, but still Damon felt guilty because he was convinced he had created the rift between Rose and Leila.

* * *

She left Damon to carry the burden alone even though the young Italian never saw his daughter as such, but yes he was burdened and yes he judged himself as the reason why Rose was absent from Leila's life. When Rose left the hospital that infamous day, he had taken her burden too, he was now the only one standing with his daughter and however many phone conversations Leila could have with her mother, nothing could replace her presence that started fading throughout the years.

 _You succeeded, she left your little princess, but did you ever consider that Leila_ might need her? That was one of the questions he asked himself a lot if not the most and how do _you make up for taking someone's mother away?_ And consciously he had no answer to that, but he knew he could not blame Rose's absence now on his stubbornness of trying to take her out of the picture three years ago.

But really he just wanted to feel guilt and misplaced guilt was what he had produced. He felt the need to correct his wrongs, so even if it wasn't made consciously maybe he just wanted to give his daughter a mother to make up for the loss of the other and it so happened that she had one who also did not want her again.

But now looking at them with his objective mind he really wanted no one to hurt his daughter, one shitty mother was enough. _No one needs a woman that thinks that her child_ _was only worth twenty thousand euro_ he resonated. But then again he was not innocent in how this story played out seven years ago. He wanted a child and his wife at the time could not have one so he acted how his father and any other Salvatore would act, he made it happened.

Damon looked at Bonnie and she was so tense that he felt a bit of empathy for her. She had her green orbs focused on every movement Leila made. She was biting her lower lip and every time Leila would toss around or just stir she would quickly remove her hand like a child that burned their finger trying to play with a candle flame. He had never seen a woman so uncomfortable with a child. He turned his eyes back to the road; he really did not wanted to think more about what went down in the seven years since that day when he walked into Giuseppe's office to ask him to make his wish come true.

* * *

Bonnie was doing her best to get a grip on the situation, but she was simply scared at this point. It was ridiculous out loud but she was scared of a little girl. She had a deep fear anchored inside of her and tears were coming up; she could feel them crawling to the surface. She used her left fingers to wipe the little pearl already forming on the corner of her eyelids. She took a deep breath and stopped staring at Damon. She saw the tremor shaking her right hand that was holding Leila's head in place.

 _You can do it, just breathe, she won't wake up now_. She told herself and at that moment Leila stirred and turned her head facing Bonnie chest and for a moment Bonnie thought that she had woken up, but the little girl just winced in discomfort. She started coughing endlessly and Bonnie felt her heart speeding up as she looked at Damon helplessly. What was she supposed to do now?

"Is she okay?" she finally asked while Leila was still being shaking from each effort she made to cough.

"Is she bleeding?" Damon asked replying to her question with one of his own and his voice filled with worry.

At the mention of bleeding, Bonnie started a careful inspection of Leila; meticulously checking every spot on her face and she sighed in relief when she noticed there were no sign of blood.

"No there is nothing, she's just coughing, but it seemed like it was painful for her." she replied sounding extremely worried and Leila was still coughing. Her chest was violently rising.

"She's fine then" Damon replied focusing one more time on the road and using one of his hands to search in the glove box of his car. He moved multiple objects and found a little bottle containing pills and a handkerchief. He grabbed both and reached behind to give them to Bonnie. "If she starts bleeding wake her up and give her the pills." he stated calmly being used to the situation, having his daughter randomly bleeding was now so normal.

But Bonnie went in full panicked mode. _Was he kidding, how could she be fine if she_ was _coughing her lungs out?_ _What is wrong with this dude?_ She looked at him with utter surprise, but once again he was focused on the road, she grabbed the pills and the handkerchief and put them to her side a bit irritated. "Are you sure she is okay, like she's still coughing and she looks really, really in pain" she asked still not believing him, but he said nothing completely unconcerned by her worries.

She wanted to ask him again but at that moment Leila let out a little cry of pain and Bonnie stopped focusing on Damon and went back to staring at the little girl. Her face was now covered by her curls and she was wheezing a bit. _Fine my ass_ she thought, she moved the hair that was now a bit wet because the little girl was sweating. Bonnie started aimlessly putting order in Leila's curls by combing through the curls with her fingers. She gently pulled the little girl's hair up and freed her face. She grabbed the little black scrunchy holding her hair together and pulled it out before putting it on Leila's hair to make a ponytail. _At least they won't disturb you now_ she whispered to no one really.

* * *

Leila's face was now fully uncovered and Bonnie just took her in. The little princess with curly hair was beautiful, maybe the most beautiful little girl she has never seen even if she looked a bit too small and fragile, but she was just that perfect. Her oval face, her little nose and her cupid's bow mouth that was exaggeratedly pink in contrasted with the pale color of her skin. Her features were alternating between peaceful and angelic to excruciating pain.

After minutes of her coughing Bonnie was really worried and afraid the little girl might choke or something worse, so she carefully grabbed her and rearranged the little girl's position placing her head full of curls on her chest and sitting Leila on her lap. She started drawing little circles with her hand while she closed her arm around Leila. She was trying to soothe the coughing by slightly tapping on her back in rhythm. She was carefully listening to her breathing and cradling the little frame. She was waiting for it to become effortless and praying for the coughing to stop because her little girl really looked like she was going through a lot of pain.

Absent mindedly she started humming a lullaby very lowly, just for Leila to hear. She was doing it very instinctively. She felt like the child needed to know that someone was with her. She hadn't sung a cradlesong in forever, she was sure she did not know one in Italian thinking the little girl would find her own tongue more comforting, but here she was trying. Therefore she just hummed one of her favorite Italian songs; with time she stopped humming and started singing the lyrics louder than she intended.

"Di quei violini suonati dal vento, L'ultimo bacio mia dolce sul viso come gocce di limone.  
L'eroico coraggio di un feroce sono lacrime mentre piove piove  
Mentre piove piove. Mentre piove piove  
"(Of those violins played by the wind. The last kiss my sweet little girl .Burns on his face like drops of lemon, the heroic courage of a fierce goodbye. But they are tears while it rains it rains it rains.)

And it seemed the song was having the expected effect, the little girl was easing back into her sleep and Bonnie just felt her heart swell with a bit of pride, she had succeeded in making her feel a bit better. She checked to see if there were any traces of blood but nothing. So she continued singing and smoothing Leila's hair back. She stared at the little girl's face for minutes with inquiry and anguish because she liked this way more than she had wished and there was also a bit of adoration. Leila was just beautiful and for a moment she wondered if this really came out of her. She felt her eyes itching, the tears weren't far, she raised her eyes to look away and she found Damon haggard eyes on her.

Damon's attention was caught by her humming, but when she started singing he felt compelled to look back. And when his eyes fell on Bonnie singing to Leila, he felt like he was intruding on a moment so private. He had doubted so much that she any maternal instinct that this moment looked so surreal. At the beginning of their trip she seemed so uncomfortable and out of place with Leila, but now she was fitting in.

The entire picture was kind of idyllic and heavenly; she had a very smooth and beautiful voice. She was pronouncing each word softly like they were a secret for only she and Leila to hear and he had accidently step into their word. If it was not so beautiful and innocent, he would have been jealous and worried that she might want his daughter like Stefan suggested. Her eyes on Leila were soft; the green was lighter, nothing similar to the hardness before. She looked like a completely different woman. She had another light and she looked delicate, even more delicate than what her little frame already suggested, but when Damon's eyes met Bonnie's it entirely stopped. She noticed him and all her defenses went back up and her demeanor changed.

* * *

"I thought it would help" she said a bit confused and really not knowing what to say under his intense scrutiny and the blue of his eyes heavy on her. He smiled at her for the first time with kindness and she took notice of how that little gesture changed him physically. He seemed less scary and a bit more alive and she found it comforting, but at that moment she wasn't really looking for comfort.

"It did the trick, she stopped." he simply replied and looked back at the road; they were maybe ten minutes away from the hospital. He was in the hurry to leave the car at this point; the atmosphere was way too heavy. He turned his back to her because he did not want to pursue another conversation on the road, but also he found himself looking at her inappropriately.

If he was sure about one thing it was that physically Bonnie Bennett was beautiful and god be blessed she was not as beautiful inside, or at least he thought, not that it really mattered for him at the time, but now it did. But there were those moments when he looked at her when she seemed to morph into someone so humane and in those moments she became ethereal. He did not need to be his usual self with her, he needed to keep his focus far away from her skirt. But at times like this it seemed a bit hard.

Her big emerald irises were looking at him with no animosity. He thought he might have seen softness, her lips curved into a smile in response to the one he offered her. And when he told her that she had succeeded in helping Leila, pride had brightened her eyes, the viridian was just amazing. And now she had her hair cascading with uncontrollable curls framing her face beautifully. Objectively speaking, if she was not who she was and he was not in the situation he was god knows he would be running after her. Damon had a taste for beautiful things and when it comes to beauty she was the incarnation of it.

 _Damn it Damon why is your mind_ _even going_ _there._ He scolded himself and tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

"She's so beautiful." Bonnie said not knowing why she felt the need to tell that to Damon but she had to tell it to someone.

"Yes she's stunning" he turned to take a glimpse, but his words seemed to just convey his thoughts toward Bonnie and the way his tone unconsciously dropped was an indication. She looked at him quizzically.

 _Wait, is he? Stop your wishful thinking Bonnie you're the one that's been eyeing him_. She argued with herself and looked at Leila one more time, but listened to Damon who was still talking to her but now his tone was back to normal less low, but still Bonnie had to admit he had a sexy voice. _What's wrong with you?_ She thought, here she was back to acting like a teenager just because he had been nice for five minutes.

"She does look a lot like you" He continued adding that little information absent mindedly because he had been thinking about it since he had met her. Bonnie frowned from her surprise; she took another look at Leila.

"Except from my crooked jaw she has nothing from me. I think she looks like you. She got beautiful blue eyes just like yours. They stand out." She wanted to cover her mouth after that. She was getting too comfortable, but Damon seemed to not notice her compliment and just smirked.

"Well whoever she looks like one thing's for sure; we're both gorgeous people so of course she's beautiful." He finished smirking while he parking the car in front of the hospital. They were both happy this trip was ending and they could step away from the awkward atmosphere.

* * *

Damon stepped out first and took a deep breath, it had been longer than he expected and more complicated that he had wished. Bonnie was still sitting in the car having her hands full with Leila not knowing what do next. She looked around and Damon was putting his suit jacket back on. She felt helpless and uncomfortable once again. She looked around happy they weren't in Mystic Falls, at least no one would go gossiping or even possibly come up with a theory.

Damon opened the car and took Leila from her arms. She thought about asking to have her back for a second, but she knew better than to ask for more than the few hours she got and she did feel lighter now that the little girl was taken away from her. She exhaled and put order back to her hair letting it cascade to one side. She left her seat and looked at Damon waiting for him to indicate what to do at this point. She stood with her eyes fixated on him and when he started walking she waited a bit before following behind him. She was walking slightly behind him while looking at Leila's face which was resting on his shoulder.

She felt irritation rise inside her and she tried to look away but her eyes went back to Leila. She sighed _you had to do it, didn't you? How are you going to sleep tonight?_ She asked herself because she was already missing having her in her arms. She should have known better, she was a greedy person, of course she would want more. She was greedy when it came to affection, thinking that because she was sleeping nothing would happen was stupid and she was finding it out now. Because was already she missing her perfume and the way her little arms surrounded her neck.

Damon brought her out of her thoughts when his phone rang and his first gesture was to look at Bonnie for help because he needed to answer the call, but she simply stood there staring at him acting like she did not understand. But all she wanted was to stop before she fell deep into that emotional hole. Distance was what she needed and she needed to build the wall right back up.

* * *

"Can you just not" she contested in a very pleading voice when Damon carefully tried to give her Leila back. He looked at her a bit confused not understanding why she was regressing, but at this point he could be a bit pushy with her.

"I really need to answer this miss Bennett and you did it before, so go on" He said dropping his daughter in the arms of a very reluctant Bonnie and she carefully took the little girl. But now that there were people around she felt like she was telling the world that she had a daughter and her secret was out in the open for everyone to see. It was not a stolen moment that she would cherish anymore, this was now reality and the part of reality she never wanted to acknowledge.

She started eavesdropping on Damon's phone conversation and even if her Italian was a bit rusty she could grasp a few things and whoever it was, they were getting on his nerves.

"Well you should be thinking about what the most convenient time for her is and it's not now when she's finally sleeping. I can't just wake her up because you're finally free. And you were supposed to call her yesterday, she waited you know , don't you-" she could hear him say before he cursed. She instinctively covered Leila's ears, she did not want him to wake her up and she could see he was seconds away from shouting.

"Oh you were busy with Mateo, so what am I supposed to get from it, that Leila is a second priority behind your son. I won't do this now with you or listen any of your reasons, you can call later today if it is not as important as anything else in your life. She is sleeping now." She heard him finish and she did her best to act like she had heard nothing, but clearly she was failing because her features were very revealing.

When he came back she gave him Leila in such a rush that the little girl stirred because of the little shock that occurred when she hit his chest. He could feel Bonnie's utter discomfort and her eyes were roaming around like she was a bit embarrassed. That was enough cumulated with Damon's initial anger against Rose after the phone call to make him resentful toward her. He looked at her with his eyes filled with disgust and he stared at her for a minute trying to figure out where was the woman that had made an appearance in the car or for a few minutes in the café, but now she was only the coldest person he ever met.

"How does it feel to be so dead inside that your own child disgusts you, enlighten me. How someone becomes so inhuman." He spat his disgust for women he judged like her to her face, but he had given up on understanding and he was angry because he would never fix what he did to Leila and surely not with this woman.

 _What did you really expect from someone who somehow ended up owing something to Giuseppe?_ He had always assumed maybe his father had not used his usual ways, but this woman screamed messed up. So yes unconsciously he might have wanted to fix Leila's broken maternal relation to ease his guilt, but now he would stick to getting the bone marrow and get this bitch out of their life.

"You should have asked me six year ago, I would have known the answer" she answered with wit trying to hide her hurt and pain, with time she had become good at it. Faking was how she survived "so now that you have gotten your anger out can we move on and get done with it" she said now walking at head of him and not giving it a second thought.

* * *

Doctor Fell was expecting Damon and Bonnie for a series of immunologic testing. It was confirmed that Damon was not immunocompatible like Stefan and all the other family members on Damon side, so the best hope was now Bonnie and her family. Damon gave Leila to a nurse who took her inside a room so she could properly rest as a suggestion from Doctor Fell, and Bonnie felt way more comfortable at that moment at least as comfortable as she could be in a hospital room.

Bonnie had different misadventures in hospitals, every time she stepped in one something completely bad would happen in her life. Leaving Leila, Sheila getting diagnose with a neurodegenerative disease so yes Damon was not the only one having someone seriously ill in his life and at this point Bonnie could only care about one, her grams. She was looking around a bit worried and calmly sat when the oncologist offered them a seat.

She looked at Damon and he still looked utterly pissed, so she rolled her eyes. She put her hand on her lap to avoid playing with her fingers because of the stress. Doctor Fell's first question startled her. She looked up a bit surprised and trying to fully catch the sentence.

"So you must be Miss Salvatore?" Doctor Fell asked with a formal tone while grabbing a paper to make Bonnie's medical history. Bonnie looked at Damon before answering and he looked completely disinterested by what was going on.

"No just Miss Bennett we are not married or in any type of relationship" she tried to mumbled and Doctor Fell just took note of her name.

"Oh sorry, I'm glad to finally meet you I was growing quite worried by your absence by Leila's side. In such times I often see the mother more than father. So you'll need to answer a few questions to help me set you medical record."

"Well I am just her biological mother maybe that could explain it" Bonnie said keeping her cool while Doctor Fell reddened with embarrassment and Damon just did not care about what was happening still ruminating over his previous call and anger.

"Oh I just assumed, please I am sorry. Okay miss Bennett do you have any history of hereditary diseases." The woman asked and Bonnie answered. And few more questions were asked about her life, her family, her job and her physical and mental health. As far as those were concerned she was able to withstand the surgery

"Do you have any relatives we could considerate as possible pool of donors if you happen to be not compatible?" she asked Bonnie

"Well I have no sibling, my grandmother would probably be excluded because of her health and my parents are dead." She said. Everything about Sheila was the truth, the rest was a lie, but she was not planning to have her secret revealed to her family. As long as Leila was only known to her and people she had thrown out of her life. She was still capable of moving on and hiding behind a wall, but making her known to her friends and family would change that and anchored her as part of her reality; that was not an option.

Doctor Fell was a bit disappointed that was making Bonnie the only viable option so far and Damon and Bonnie could read her deception, finally for the first time he decided to intervene in the conversation. Trying to calm the anguish that had risen with the possibility that Bonnie could be incompatible. He swallowed hard and tried to calm himself so he could ask the proper questions.

"So if she is not compatible, what are we going to do?" he inquired and for the first time Bonnie was maybe feeling the same panic as him. She needed the money, but now she also wanted Leila to be safe and she wanted to help in that regard.

* * *

"Well she's on the recipient list and we'll try our best so she can be a priority, being a kid shouldn't make it hard, but she's Italian so it would be best to get her listed in Italy. But again donor list can take an incredible amount of time." She said looking at the both depicted parents and continued "then there is something that might take less time but also a bit unethical. Both of you could have another child that will be engineered. It is not common in the US but can be done in Europe, but that is a last resort case."

They both looked at each other and Damon was definitely ready to do anything, but Bonnie wasn't willing to go that far. Nine months and another child, she had no reason on earth go through something as painful as that again. The oncologist could see the silent conversation and the course of each other's thoughts.

"But we are far from that. After all we still have to test you" she stated and grabbed her needles. In a similar way to Leila Bonnie recoiled in view of them. She had such a phobia of needles. She desperately looked at Damon and tears were almost forming in her eyes.

 _For someone refusing to admit her daughter is hers, they have a hell lot of traits in common_. He thought recognizing her reaction in relation with the sight of needles. Doctor Fell prepared the examination bed and looked at Bonnie to indicate she had to lay on it, but the caramel woman just stood there almost petrified. She had a fear of pain and hospital pain seemed to be the worse. She looked at the sacral biopsy needle and a little tear fell from her eye.

In that second Damon had to let go of his anger and put his arm around her. He was so used to dealing with this situation with Leila. He hugged her a bit uncomfortably at the beginning because all her muscles were tensed as she was making an effort to not cry. He started smoothing her head while cradling her. She relaxed and leaned in a bit; letting a little sob escape.

She felt ridiculous because she was breaking down just because of needles. He raised her face so he could see her and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. She was red feeling really ridiculous but Damon seemed to be calm during the entire process, matter of habit.

"Hey look at me it is okay. I get it you are scared, but I'm just right here." He said as affectionately as possible and she just nodded, but did nothing to move. He looked at her and this was way too similar to his habit with his little girl that it was hard to stay angry at someone so scared.

"Okay you want to look at them and see that there are really small." He said to her and even though he sounded really patronizing it was helping her to focus rather than looking every five seconds to those metallic monsters. She shook her head to say no.

"Right that one does not work with Leila either. I guess ice cream won't work with you?" he asked trying to distract her. She chuckled a bit through her tears while she was trying to calm herself and while he was distracting her, he led her to the bed. She just noticed that she had been tricked by that little conversation when she was on the bed

"Can she just hide them, so I don't have to face them" she pleaded feeling a bit calmer after Damon's attempt at comforting her and Doctor Fell did it.

"Damon I'm gonna ask you to leave because I doubt Miss Bennett would be comfortable removing her top with you here."

"No I don't mind really he's helping" she said giving him her hand to hold. He was hesitant, but he grabbed it and took the seat next to her complying with her demand.

"What if I tell you a story to distract you?" He was trying to avert his gaze from lingering on her half naked body, but before he started saying a word, the door slightly opened and Leila let her head slide through the small opening.

"Papa?" she asked and just by listening to her voice Bonnie knew who's it was and her worries about needles disappeared, but now her heart was galloping. _I am screwed, I really am._

* * *

 _ **Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter.**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thanks for the review and follow, here is chap 6, hopefully you will like this chapter also. Review fav, follow and maybe some will understand that well there is a lot of hidden and deep rooted problems between the adults. And sorry it came**_ _**so late. I disclaim everything, tvd is not mine or Bonnie would have picked Damon not Enzo**_

 _ **Beta by the lovely Sc0rpi0-Karma**_

* * *

Bonnie felt extremely exposed and not for the obvious reasons—she was topless in front of a stranger who was holding her hand. She felt exposed because the fragile child in her came creeping out as soon as Leila's voice echoed in that office. She had her head facing the bed so she could not see what was happening, but she could hear it; and what she was hearing had moved her to her core.

Her heart stopped when the little girl repeated herself with a more interrogatory tone. A single word and she was shivering with fear. Her fear of her own daughter eclipsed her fear of needles; she forgot herself and her surroundings. Survivor instincts started fighting her maternal instincts. She was in a fight or flight situation and if she was not having her sacrum punctured she would be miles away.

 _Lord please let her just stop at the door. Please please_! She started begging the heavens and her hand tightened around Damon's pulling him back to reality. The Italian man seemed a bit surprised like in a haze; he too did not expect his daughter to make an appearance. He was a bit too concentrated on the mission of comforting Bonnie that he barely heard the low pitch voice of his daughter. He looked at the door and his little princess was trying to sneak a peek at what was going inside the room.

"Papa" Leila insisted her voice a bit tired and irritated from the lack of response to her call. She made a little step into the room. Her feet hitting the floor felt like a dagger pushing inside Bonnie's heart, a little deeper with each step.

"Si principessa" Damon finally answered and for a split second Leila stopped as a result and the pressure around Bonnie heart decreased. Damon looked at his daughter then looked at the shaky hand of the petite mocha woman that quickly escaped his grip and started communicating with him.

With her hands Bonnie was notified that he needed to go to their daughter before she got the bad idea to come closer. Damon hesitated in what would be the right course of action; he was feeling like maybe putting her in a situation where she was forced to interact with Leila would have made her a more willing participant and bound her to their contract. Therefore he stayed there looking at her with a very conflicted expression.

* * *

 _Maybe she just needs a push before she eases into it_. He tried to rationalize because he needed her involved; having no other choice than to participate and help. If Bonnie's words echoed right in him, he knew Leila was this woman kryptonite. He looks at her and he feels the weight of the choice he has to make. _But are you really willing to walk all_ _over her? Not that it ever stopped me before, but maybe this is not about you_. He thought because really it was not about him and that was another concept he had only recently learned to be familiar with. He was a Salvatore and his name was enough to obtain what he wanted and more where he came from.

Her thirty minute speech echoed in his mind and definitely he knew? He offered a comforting caress to her hand and her tense muscles relaxed. _You have a soft spot for her, I have a soft spot for her or I would not have hesitated. I can hear dad's disapproving tone_ _on that one_. He told himself knowing full well that was the only reason he had been so hesitant – _you used dirty means with her_. Even if he could not see her eyes, he knew she was grateful and he felt his heart swell, he really picked the wrong girl to kind of want. Damon stood from the seat next to Bonnie and started walking toward Leila to get her out of the room.

"Hey principessa, you are finally awake?" he said when he tried to grab her so he could lift her up. She smiled at him, but dodged his hands and offered her cheek for a kiss. Damon looked at her with a smirk and kissed where her forefinger was resting.

"Voila, satisfied?" he asked and she kept an intrigued expression. Leila was trying to see the person on the bed. She caught her father holding her hand and now she was intrigued.

"Is the lady okay?" she pointed toward Bonnie and looked at her father a bit worried. She knew too well what it meant to be on that bed with needles surrounding you. She tried to bypass Damon's shoulder now that he was kneeling in front of her so she could get a better glimpse at the person.

"What lady?" Damon answered to fast but also taken by surprise with her line of questioning. Leila gave him the "really" look; she was way too brilliant to fall for such a diversion. She impatiently rolled her eyes at him like she did every time she felt annoyed or unsatisfied by something. He never knew where that little habit came from until he met Bonnie who often did the same.

"That lady, on the bed" she countered pointing at the bed and forcing Damon to turn to look at Bonnie who now had her hand in a strong fist. Her skin had turned an astonishing shade of pale. Her knuckles were blue from the incommensurable amount of pressure she put in her fist. He couldn't tell if she was trying to withstand the pain of her puncture or if it was out of fear. But seeing her reaction to every word coming from Leila's mouth he assumes fear.

She almost stopped breathing when the conversation between father and daughter started turning around to her. Little pearls of tears were forming at the corner of her eyes, with each word she could feel her sanction coming.

"Oh that lady…" she heard Damon said before he waited to find a way to proceed with his next sentence and then she heard him again " Leila " he called after her with a strong tone like he was trying to stop her. The little girl had decided steps but Damon caught up with her quickly and took her hand.

Bonnie heard some protests escaping the curly hair princess' mouth and feet going away. For few second she madly wanted her to actually reach her, but she was grateful that Damon could stop her. She released air that she was agonizingly holding and relaxed listening to the silence in the room. They eventually were gone.

* * *

 _They are gone, they are gone_. She tried to calm herself while a tear shyly left her eye. _She is gone along with the only occasion you had to ever talk to her_. Now her tears were filled with regret; the relief gone and her fear of needles were coming back with no adrenaline to suppress it. And she definitely felt alone with her hand hanging to the side of the bed, it felt extremely heavy now that Damon was not there to hold it. She wanted everything to just end so she could go home.

"It is okay miss. Doctor Fell will be really, really careful" she heard a little voice saying with a strong Italian accent. She heard heavier footstep comeback into the room

"Leila, what did I tell you about people's privacy" Damon asked authoritatively and it just confirmed what the Bennett girl had thought; not that she needed more than her gut to know the exact moment the little girl had come close to her.

"But Papa, she is your friend and you left her all alone." The little girl answered as if that could justify anything and her voice was filled reproach for the lack of care her father had for his friend. Well she assumed Bonnie was Damon's friend since she saw him holding her hand. She looked at him innocently while she pulled the chair he was sitting on previously aside so she could climb into it and sit closer to the bed.

"Sorry Papa left you alone miss. I am afraid of Doctor Fell's needles sometimes too; so I don't like being alone in here," she finished as she put her hand inside Bonnie's hand and started balancing her hanging legs. She waited for Bonnie to say something but the woman kept quiet but her fingers intertwined with Leila's of their own will. The little girl gave a little squeeze and turned toward her father to ask him to get closer.

Damon was in awe sometimes his little girl was just too empathic. Leila was the kind of little girl to bring home all the hurt birds of the neighborhood, she made Stefan and him adopt two of the oldest dogs in the kennel just because she heard that they were too old to have a family. So her trying to comfort Bonnie was really in character. He felt a bit guilty toward the young woman because he assumed the distress she was going through in this instant.

He walked toward Bonnie and Leila decided to stop everything before he went too far and the mocha woman ended up more broken than she already seemed to be. He knew that this was an opportunity to maybe glue her to their contract, but he felt himself unwilling to cause her pain at that moment. He for once attempted to understand her fragility and it would be pretentious to intend that he did so; but now after seeing her being so fragile in front of those needles. He just felt like she deserved a break.

"Leila lets go, you are making the lady uncomfortable" Damon said with a cutting tone but the little girl refused to back up from her new mission. She knew the woman was scared and she wanted to help.

"But she will be scared if we leave her alone. And I am not disturbing her. Am I disturbing you miss?" the little girl asked Bonnie with a very indecisive tone but with a bit of regret. She really wanted to help someone she thought was in the same situation as her. And she thought at least she had her dad, but this woman was all alone, no one came with her.

* * *

 _Ain't she a sweetheart, but you just have to stop this Bon? This is your way out?_ She resonated with herself. It was best for this little girl to stay really far away from her because at this point she knew her daughter was a little angel that wanted to protect strangers _. And I need to tell her dad to give her a good lesson about strangers_. Her thoughts drifted from the problem ahead but she wouldn't sleep quiet if this little one made it a habit to be extremely familiar with strangers. She knew her maternal instinct always kicked in at the wrong moment. She needed to be cold now, not think about such concerns. _You just have to let Damon get her out of the room, we will be all fine and she will be grateful you walked out really early. Keep quiet that's the plan._

"Damon it is fine she is not disturbing" she heard her voice stupidly say those words while her tone was rasp indicating she was crying. _What the fuck you are doing_? She really did not know, but she would not be the one to tell that little pleading voice that she was doing no good trying to comfort her. The tone she used while asking if she was disturbing was too cute and adorable. She just felt her resolve melt whilst her apprehension grew stronger; what was she supposed to do?

"You see Papa, I am not disturbing. What your name miss, mine is Leila?" she said her voice accusing Damon while softening when she talked to Bonnie. The young man gave his daughter a strict look that he had difficulty maintaining and she shrunk a bit seeing she was getting out of line with her father. She smiled apologetically knowing well it would be enough to escape that one and turned back to Bonnie.

"Bonnie, little princess" she said her voice still oozing with heaviness because of the tears that were now freely falling. The pillow her face was laying on was soaked in it and her heart was just swollen for the first time with something other than regret when it concerned her daughter. Bonnie's greatest cause of pain the year that had followed Leila's birth was the idea that maybe she gave her daughter to people worse than her own parents. It haunted her that maybe just maybe on top of abandoning her, she had also threw her into a possible hell.

But just knowing how humane the little girl was, removed part of that consuming guilt. The room was silent apart from Leila trying to match the right pronunciation of Bonnie. Repeating the name for minutes with a very melodious tone while Damon was looking at the scene with a very apprehensive expression; for him this meant a lot because this maybe could be the only opportunity that his daughter would have to interact with her mom. And he felt what it was costing from Bonnie's side to attempt to participate because in her voice there was a lot of pain and awkwardness.

* * *

Bonnie was swimming in sea of conflicting emotions. Her reasonable conscious was screaming at her the mistake she just made, explaining that now Leila was no more only a fantasy or a figment of her imagination. The little girl was now a voice and a future painful memory, but at the same time she was just so beautiful and right now she was holding her hand.

When finally she found her way of saying Bonnie adequately, she stopped and started playing with the young woman's fingers. She was counting them and looking at the color of her nails that she found beautiful. _Such tiny fingers,_ "you are so tiny" Leila said out of the blue. Well she was thinking compared to the other adults Bonnie was kind of tiny.

"Really, you are not much of a giant yourself" Bonnie replied feigning offense but chuckling a bit, she was losing some of her restrictions with the random thing coming out of Leila's mouth. The little girl had a sense of humor that was useful in such moments when there was tension to diffuse. Damon looked at both girls and took a seat. At this speed they would only leave when Leila felt like Bonnie would be good on her own.

"You can't see me?" Leila asked suspiciously facing Bonnie while the young woman's face was hidden below a pillow. She raised an eyebrow in suspicion and confirmed she could not be seen by shaking her finger

"Yes but you sound tiny" Bonnie countered now that she was getting a good grip of their conversation and what her voice could let out.

"But I am not, I am pretty tall for my age" the little princess said proudly, but Bonnie only laughed because she knew the little curly head was extremely small. She gave a little pinch on Bonnie hand and that surprised Bonnie while Damon decided to intervene.

"Leila, apologize to Bonnie right now that's not right." The man said reprimanding his daughter for her misbehavior.

"Sorry Miss Bonnie, but did you feel it" she asked genuinely

"Feel what?" Bonnie asked.

"Then it worked, you are free Miss Bonnie" She said happily and finally released Bonnie's hand. She moved out of her chair while Doctor Fell was getting the precious liquid into the test tube.

"Well that's done Miss Bennett" Doctor Fell said as she took the tube to give to the nurse for laboratory testing. Eventually Bonnie understood the reason why the little girl pinched her and she smiled into the pillow proudly.

 _Pretty and smart, she distracted me_. But now she has to build the courage to rise from the bed and finally look at the little girl. And now the real anxiety built worse than anything she's ever felt. She felt the emptiness in her hand now that Leila had removed her fingers. She took a deep breath. She was afraid to lose the small and useless protection that the pillow her face was hiding in seemed to represent. She wiped the previous tears that were drying on her cheeks.

* * *

 _One, two ….. Three you can do it. No you can't. She is such a lovely little girl; why does she have to be just this amazing_? She has a conversation with herself now that the choice of burying her head under the sand was removed. She wanted to rise, but she just needed a bit of time to prepare herself.

Damon saw the turmoil the young woman must be going through. He walked toward the bed and carried Leila. The little girl tried to protest, but she was calmly silenced.

"Why don't you give Miss Bonnie a bit of privacy now and you can see her later" Damon said as he looked back at Bonnie who finally looked up. She raised her hand as to tell him she was okay. Twenty minutes, a pinch, a very weird conversation and she knew. She needed to get something worth the heartache to come if she was going to cry _obviously you will cry, you are crying right now_. She chastised herself as she felt a new flow of tears. She tried to clean them away while Damon walked back and offered her a tissue.

"You will be okay, I am right here remember" Damon mouthed to her and gave her another set of tissues. He gave her the top she was wearing and she grabbed it to pull it back on. She tried to clean her face to the bare minimum. She was not using the only day she was allowed to meet her daughter without her guilty conscious eating her from inside looking like a raccoon.

"Okay now Miss Bonnie is decent" Damon said as he put down little Leila and now she is back to her shy self. Now she was not led by the desire to help. She was hiding behind her father's legs looking at the woman a bit strangely with a lot of questions, but she was a bit scarred. She pulled on her father's pants, he bent to listen to her and she whispered something.

"Miss Bonnie, Leila is asking if you are okay" Damon said with his voice trying to hide the lack of enthusiasm he felt at being the middle man, but this also was expected from his daughter. She could come off as an extrovert but she was extremely shy around people and now that Bonnie was facing her, not so tiny anymore. She had lost her bravado.

"Well now I am, she helped a lot with the needles. Like you know I am extremely afraid of those." Bonnie replied a bit disappointed that it might be the only thing she would get from the little girl. The little princess shyly smiled and went behind her father trying to find a way to actually enter the conversation.

Damon looked at Leila with very encouraging eyes and the little girl bit her lip and took a few breaths.

"Me too" she finally said, but so low that it would have been inaudible if Bonnie was not focusing all her attention on her. "Me too I don't like needles mostly the big metallic one." she finished now extremely loud because she was trying her best to be audible to Bonnie. She awkwardly moved a little away from Damon's legs to fully look at Bonnie who was as awkward as her maybe even more.

When she was finally out of Damon shadow, Bonnie wanted to crumble under her emotions. She wanted to run and hug the little frame of the shy girl. She looked at those cyan eyes that she never thought she would see again and they were just as beautiful as she remembered. They kept the vibrant blue and now standing next to Damon, they really had the same eyes. Now looking at him would be hard too. She tried to push all the tears back so she wouldn't stress the little girl out more and she looked for the same courage that Leila was digging from.

"Aww that is another thing we have in common, we are tiny and scared of needles." She said gently. She was as loud as Leila which meant completely inaudible; Damon had difficulties following the entire conversation, but both mother and daughter seemed to understand each other. For him this was a cause of stress because he did not need to bring in another person that could hurt his little baby. From what was happening it would not be hard for Leila to get attached and whatever Bonnie was saying, he could read that she would do the same. This was a troubling situation.

* * *

"I am not tiny, I will get taller when I get better" she said and finally stepped away from her father and stood taller to prove what she was saying. Bonnie bitterly smiled and started wearing that sad expression at the little girl mentioning her situation. Damon gave her a warning look to stop. Leila was easily affected by the way the other perceived her situation.

She might never say it but Damon could see it every time she would comeback from Rose's . She would wear those heavy expressions and Damon tried to tell Rose to hide it better but it seemed she was failing there too. He had forced himself to do it around her; when Leila felt people stress out she grew worried and it was not good for her. So he mouthed for Bonnie to stop.

The brunette did not need much more to put up a little wall for her daughter; that was the least she could do when she thought of this moment as the only one she would agree to steal of her daughter. She plastered the most adorable smile she could and with her eyes she asked him if it was enough. Damon nodded grateful and appreciative that she did care enough about his daughter's feelings. He felt like apologizing for the harsh words he said to her after his argument with Rose. He was just projecting his anger.

"Then it won't take long before you grow as big and strong as a tree," she replied sweetly while softly looking at the little crooked smile brightening the pale features of her curly headed princess while some of the curls she had put in a quick ponytail were now escaping. The little girl was now messily trying to pull them away from her face, but they kept coming back.

Bonnie walked toward her backpack and looked for the cute pink scrunchy she always kept; the one with the cute bow and she pulled it out. She walked and kneeled in front of Leila; she stopped what she wanted to do when those big beautiful blue orbs stopped on her for a second before they shied away. She tearfully smiled; she was torturing herself at this point it felt like grabbing what she had wished for years ago and knowing you had to let it go in few seconds.

She pulled her daughter's hair out and put the black scrunchy she had used previously on her arm. This little thing would probably be the last thing she would have to remember her daughter by. She softly and carefully held Leila's curls up; she started to tie her hair in an elaborate ballerina chignon. This was the third motherly thing she had done for her precious princess. She had carried her for thirty minutes as a baby, she had sang a lullaby in a car and now probably the last one she would do is tying her hair like the ballerina she was supposed to be when she got better.

 _My little girl will get better, I will make sure of that and it will be the last time I put some else above me_. She thought as she put the last touches to the dashing chignon. She had dreamed about doing this for seven years. This simple very maternal thing that was to take care of her daughter's hair was probably the happiest moment she had recently; just like holding her six years ago, carrying baby Leila had been her ray of sun in that dark period.

One thing she had thought about a lot was if a couple of white people could take care of her daughter's African curls, but it seemed they did a good job; another thing to remove from her teenage list of worries. With the years she had found a way to bypass worries until what was left was only indifference and memories of trauma.

She was still angry with anger direct at everyone, even this little one in front of her, but those blue eyes and untamable curls, one look at them and her anger evaporated and for a second she just wanted to be the teenager who wanted to keep her daughter. The one who thought about the ballet classes she would drive her to and the concerts and all the Bantu knots she wanted to do on her head. She really wanted just to be everything but this broken version life had left behind , she wanted to be the girl who had enough courage to leave that son of a bitch behind and his troubles, and stop this Italian man from taking her daughter.

* * *

She finished her ministration on Leila's head and smiled widely at the little girl "here you go darling" the endearing terms were just coming naturally to her. She looked around to get a little make up mirror out to show the little girl how beautiful she was. Leila smiled brighter than Bonnie ever thought was possible and for the first time her eyes stopped on her mother, she carefully touched every side of her ballerina bun. She stopped and gently kissed Bonnie's cheek.

"It is super pretty just like the ballerina on TV, you know Papa, or like the one we saw in Florence," she turned to look at her father who only smiled. Damon felt guilty knowing that those were moments his daughter was missing with her mother; maybe he needed to put his pride aside and try to convince Rose to be more present. He did not know how to do such chignon, looking at how happy Leila was—he did take a lot from her he already knew that much.

"Bonnie is a ballerina maybe that why she is so tiny," Damon added for his daughter feeling like he needed to offer his daughter more information about her biological mother. Leila's eyes brightened, a real ballerina, she was talking to a real ballerina and she became a bit shyer and blushed. She started biting her nails.

 _She is so pretty; I should have known she was a ballerina. Papa's friend is a ballerina but she is here so she must be sick like me_. Her happy thought ended up sadly, now thinking that Miss Bonnie was sick and it hurting her a bit. Damon could see the course of his daughter's thoughts with the little frown forming on her face.

"So you are also tiny because you are sick" Leila asked sadly surprising Bonnie with her interest in her.

"Oh no little princess I am not sick, I am tiny because like your dad said I am a ballerina. All good ballerinas are tiny." She replied with a smile before adding "except you, you will be an amazing super tall ballerina."

"So what are you doing visiting Doctor Fell,I come here because I am sick," Leila continued her inquisition.

"I am here because a friend who is dear to me needs my help to get better." Bonnie said with a smile that reached her ears, showing how genuine it was.

"Oh like Uncle Stefan and Papa with me." Leila asked before shyly adding "you want to be my friend too; you do really pretty bun instead of Uncle Stefan who just puts it everywhere and Papa pfffff," she snorted at the idea of Damon doing her bun.

Bonnie just looked at her daughter with so much kindness–she was ready to offer a comforting lie. She looked at Damon and waited for his opinion because she did not want to overstep and knew her words wouldn't really mean anything.

"Papa, can we keep Miss Bonnie with us?" She said following the silent conversation between the adults. Bonnie laughed at the question.

"Cara, Miss Bonnie is not a lost puppy you can't keep people," Damon answered

"But she's your friend, if you ask her, she might say yes." She said with a beautiful grin and pulled his pants so he could ask.

"Miss Bonnie, can we keep you?" Damon asked with a trademark smirk that would have melted ice and Bonnie was not immune to seeing a grown man so much under the thumb of his shy little girl.

"I will think about it" she said to throw Leila off and picked her back up on her way out ready to leave the hospital with Leila holding Damon's hand just behind her.

* * *

Damon put Leila in the back seat and buckled her up. He closed the car door and went back to talk to Bonnie.

"I can offer you a lift back it won't be any trouble" he said trying to have a light conversation with her before trying a dive into the deep subject.

"Don't worry what happened today won't happen again? I have no intention of settling in her life. She deserves a bunch of good things and bunch of shitty mothers are not part of that list." She calmly said. He looked at her incredulously, yes he had exchange few harsh words with her, but after what he saw today, he knew there was more to that woman than this bitchy persona she always projected.

"Believe me on the scale of shitty mothers, you are far from one. I had one and married one. I'm kind of an expert." He said trying to comfort her one more time. He surprised himself in the way he was always trying to play the white knight for her every time, even when she was being this cold person. Maybe just maybe it was what he was seeing below the surface, but also because he had a feeling he had wronged her somehow.

"They didn't sell you or her, did they? I did just that and being next to her is wonderful, I won't lie, but it's also painful. I get angry, so angry, what if I become resentful of her?" she asked to no one, but simply to herself and now the long awaited tears were about to come out again. She was already crying and she only noticed when he wiped her tears with his thumbs. He looks at her with a very caring manner which happened a lot today.

"You should see the way you look at her. I don't have to tell you that because I don't want you stealing my daughter or feeling entitled. But for once I won't make it about me; you maybe not capable of accepting that she is not the one behind your sorrow and you are probably the martyr type, but you love her and always will." he patronizingly answered her and Bonnie looked past his shoulder to take a look at the girl she refused to accept in her life, and yes, she loves her so much that's why she was being extremely careful.

"You're just wrong, your daughter really hurts me and she will continue to do so. But I will never hurt her if I don't have to . Don't put me in the position where I will please. Please…" she is stupidly pleading with him for no reason. Before she gave away her daughter she thought her mother was the worse type of mother that could exist: the absentee type that had a child she left for better pastures and only remembered when she needed something. But herself, she was another case altogether.

Bonnie understood giving your child away for honorable purposes because you thought life would be better, but she was right to judge herself, abandoning Leila was not the Damocles sword hanging over her head. Her guilt came from a deep rooted hatred that she had took twenty thousand Euros and made a child like it was as simple as making a cookie. Now she knew her daughter never had the mother she wished she had, she threw her in the same type of hands that she was raised by. She was grateful for Damon, but was angry at Rose. But she still thought even Rose was better than her.

"You keep saying that you will hurt her, that you sold her , Bonnie you gave me my child, I'm just as guilty as you are," Damon gently added trying to comfort her and he knew where this was going he just needed her to tell what he suspected. She looked at him wondering what was wrong with him. If he was worried she would not help, he was wrong. She planned to give her daughter another life and this time it will be her apology then she will want nothing to do with all of this and what was left behind...

"You were not the one dating a stupid teenager; foolish enough to bet with both your lives. You were not the fool who agreed to sell your child to a group of Italian mobsters. You know how lucky it was that she ended up with you and not the human trafficking ring. But you know at the time I did not care because a stupid boy needed my help. I was forced to conceive her; I was not a willing participant. She was twenty thousand euros for me until I saw her and chickened out," she started confessing while she was still crying and doing her best to hide everything from Leila.

"It's okay, I am sorry, but she was safe, I promise" he tried to console her, but he was also trying to appease his guilt. He knew all along that asking his father was a bad idea. He knew but he did not care who would suffer because it was always about what Damon wanted. And if it was not for this woman crying right now, he wouldn't have cared that much . It was Salvatore business, as shady as it could get.

"It's not okay. I saw you in the hospital with your wife and I saw you carrying my baby. He told me you were rich and you would be better parents than I could. So I trusted him or more I believed his lies and I did nothing, cowardly knowing everything bad that could happen and the people I was involved with. You were just a lucky draw." She was pouring her heart out revealing truth she never dared to tell herself, but she needed someone else to know her sins, like he could make them less heavy just by listening to her.

"Can we keep you?" that was all Damon could say and he hugged her, she was blaming herself because she had the misadventure of probably being tangled with his family and his father. She didn't need to know that her daughter was the blood of the person that had pushed her to such extremes and unconsciously he did not want her to hate him too. Then she could refuse to help his daughter . They needed to keep her so he repeated the question

"Can she keep you, can we keep you?"

* * *

 _ **Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Thanks for the reviews and follows, here is chap 7, hopefully you will like this chapter also. Review fav, follow to tip the writer. This chapter will help see through things.**_

 _ **This is beta by Sc0rpi0-Karma who was generous enough to take time during her holiday and personal time. she writes so check her stories  
**_

* * *

Her answer to his little plea had surprised him, she had thrown him off his game. Hours later he was still thinking about it and didn't know what to do about it. He was so absorbed by it that he was absentmindedly boring his little princess and when Leila called out his name with her weak and sleepy voice he just ignored her.

"Papa," she repeated herself tilting her head to get a better look at her father, but the man was lost deeply in his thoughts, processing everything that had happened during the complicated day he had spent with Bonnie Bennett.

"Damon she's talking to you, earth to Day," Stefan entered the room and stood by Leila's side grabbing the book she wanted. He finally sat and snapped his fingers at his elder brother in an attempt to get his attention which worked.

"Hmm, when did you get here Stefano?" Damon asked out of surprise by his young brother's proximity. When he had come back from his day at the hospital Stefan was still out on his date. His younger brother only sighed and grabbed the book to start reading his niece a bed time story whilst the other Salvatore was still a bit out of it. Stefan gave him side glances noticing his thoughtful expression. He made a mental note to ask him right after their little princess fell asleep.

In the middle of the bed time story Leila fell fast asleep and Stefan took it as his opportunity to ask more about his brother's mental state. The young man with chestnut hair had a few ideas of his own about the fragility of his brother's psyche in this new situation, he could only imagine what it was like to deal with a potential mother for Leila and the possible trouble she could bring along—the one she already had was a handful.

The entire family which in this case included Damon, Leila and Stefan were still trying to survive through the ripple of hurricane Rose. Stefan was resentful toward the brunette woman, not for personal reasons, but for what she and Damon had put Leila through. He remembered the times he used to catch the little girl crying her eyes out because her selfish parents were playing tug of war with her.

He even had stopped talking to Damon during the divorce period because the man was too blinded by personal interests and the need for revenge than being a good father and in real Damon fashion a lot had to be made to show him the wrong of his ways. And only when Stefan thought everything was back in order with his brother and ex sister-in-law putting their differences aside for Leila's sake, leukemia hit the young girl and true colors were revealed. Rose turned into what he would like to call a selfish bitch with only a maternal instinct for those whom had left her womb.

Damon and he were aware of that, but Leila had, at the beginning, started her usual coping mechanism of hiding inside the closet and crying. He had caught her a few times and from that time he had hated Rose with all his heart, he did his best to explain to the little girl that she did nothing wrong, but all that came from Leila's mouth was "so why is mama punishing me? I didn't break anything precious; I promised I was really good."

Stefan hadn't told Damon, but he had called the disgraceful mother but all she had provided as an answer was "I need to get used to this, it's really hard on me". It was hard on all of them he had wanted to reply but he just hung up, after that Stefan was done with the bitch. So now he was the most skeptical about any contact between Bonnie and Leila if it would lead to other cry in the closet. He could not afford to see their little light in pain over anyone but just looking at his brother he knew it was about that young woman Bonnie Bennett; it seemed recently everything had to do with her.

* * *

"What now?" Stefan asked passing a glass filled with bourbon to his brother waiting for him to snap out of whatever was going on.

"Pardon?" Damon asked completely out of it but grabbed the glass and drank all of it. He looked at his younger brother waiting for him to repeat which Stefan obliged to.

"What is it now? Is she backing out? Does she need more money?" Stefan asked irritated, he knew about the type of woman he suspected Bonnie to be. As soon as she agreed to help for the money he knew. He met a lot of people like her in his line of work.

"She isn't like that. It's not what you think," Damon felt the words stumble out of his mouth. He knew now that Bonnie Bennett was different. He couldn't tell how she was because he had a hard time reading through her, but she wasn't what Stefan implied. He knew Stefan was used to the vermin of this world, the bottom of this earth, Stefan was the one in charge of the family business and there you met the worse of the worse. Damon was a criminal lawyer so he also met the worse of the worse and no, Bonnie Bennett was not part of that category, far from it.

Her laugh echoed in the back of his head. Bonnie Bennett was definitely not like that. He had heard her laugh today; he had never expected to hear her laugh not at that instant, not ever. He thought she would keep that frown forever, but she had laughed at him, she had laughed at what she had called naivety. Can we keep you? He had asked and after few seconds of those viridian eyes staring at him, she had laughed. Something really shy at the beginning like a swallowed chuckle.

It was a laugh birthed from a fight against her inner sadness, she had tried to regain control "I just told you everything and you want to keep me?" she had asked him with haggard eyes. She had stared at him and laughed again whilst her tears were slowly drying. He had looked at her being emblazoned by her newly found fragility. She bit her lip trying to stop her laugh. She knew it wasn't a moment to laugh but that was the only way to express her bafflement.

"I'm sorry" the words had finally left his mouth that was what he needed to say, I am sorry you were forced to have a child by my family, by me he had thought about saying that.

"Don't be, you did nothing wrong, and look what came out of that mess just look at her" she had pointed toward the car where Leila was still passing her hands carefully on her ballerina chignon like there was an after charm to it.

But I am sorry, I really did put you through this he had wanted to insist, but she had stepped up on her toes and softly kissed his cheek. He knew what was coming: the way she had gently rejected his offer before. Her lips had lingered longer this time and she had withdrawn them with such care that they had ghosted longer on his skin. She had dropped back to her normal height no longer on her toes and his blue orbs had followed her to fall on her caring and patronizing eyes.

"I would be lucky if you kept me, so lucky, but we can't have that—can we?" She had placed a comforting hand on his arm and asked the question with hope disguised as pessimism. Hope had been long lost in her perpetual battle with the obstacles she met through her life's path.

"We can" he had whispered, he thought, he was almost sure of it but either she heard him and decided to ignore him or the words never left his mind. Nether less she laughed a last time and bypassed him to go and kissed Leila. They definitely should keep her now and not because they need her bone marrow no! They should keep her because for a fraction of second as her lips dropped on the crown of Leila's head and her nose nestled on the curls to take in the smell of coconut and almond oil. With the utter most care in which her hands surrounded the little frame all Damon could think about was she loves her that fool loves her and she is so blind to it.

What harm could really come of this if all he could see was love. She slowly separated from his daughter, their daughter and she exchanged a few words. They both laughed and it was a real, lively and happy laugh from her. It sounded like what you imagine happiness look like. Her laugh echoed for long time in the little hospital parking lot and she started walking away.

"Where are you going?" that was all he had mustered up to ask, she looked at him surprised but his expression portrayed nothing but seriousness and expectation—maybe too much expectation. He couldn't remember right now but she had simply stated.

"Work, I can't be late and before you suggest it no! I will take the bus it's no place for a child to even stand in front." She was off with a little jog; her frame disappearing in the night that had veiled the city.

The ride back home had been one where his thoughts had roamed back to a laughing Bonnie Bennett from the sad laugh, the hopeful laugh to the pure laugh the one only Leila could get out of her. And Leila talking about her every second didn't help to clean her out his mind. It was "Miss Bonnie is so pretty" here, "we need to see Miss Bonnie dance" there, "Miss Bonnie is so tinny" for hour Miss Bonnie had ringed in his ears thanks to Leila's new fascination toward the woman and yes Miss Bonnie was really pretty that was all he could see right.

* * *

"She's not like that" he had to repeat himself again just to make sure Stefan has caught that.

"And how do you know? She wasn't ready to help without the money and we do know from day one, Leila has always been a pay check for her." Stefan felt his temper rise. If his brother wasn't willing to be careful, he would be for the both of them.

"We pushed her, Giuseppe did," he said and at the mention of their father's name Stefan's stance stiffened, he had expected a lot of things but not that one.

"You're a fool Day, tell me you didn't ask Giuseppe to get you a child?" he said hopeful, waiting for his brother to confirm but Damon stayed silent. He had his answer. Stefan moved fast and tapped on the side of his head. "That just makes her a less trustworthy person if she got tangled with father." The younger Salvatore finished secured into his opinion. They were only few ways to end up tangled into the web created by Giuseppe Salvatore you either worked for him or owed him a favor and both always led to less honorable things.

"She did nothing; she was a freaking kid at the time. She was sixteen years old with the wrong person in her life" Damon defended Bonnie knowing well where this was going. "I put her into that mess, I should have never asked father."

Florence 2009

Waiting in his father's office wasn't really ideal. Damon always ended up feeling like a child waiting for his father's scolding. Giuseppe Salvatore was a man feared in all of Florence, the man owned half the hotels and casinos of the city. But he was also involved in other less legal matters, Damon as the oldest was supposed to inherit it but the boy had no talent for it, so Stefan bypassed him and Damon never had a complaint—the further he was from the business the better for his reputation as a lawyer.

Giuseppe entered the room and stopped a bit surprised by his oldest son's presence, the boy wasn't one to come around too afraid to be mixed up with his daddy. He smiled brightly and hugged his eldest son before giving a vigorous handshake.

"What brings you here bambino, what does a big boy like you need his father for?" the Italian man got straight to the point. The man had learned from experience that Damon's visits meant something wasn't going the way he wanted in his life and if it wasn't to blame him or to ask him to fix it, there was no chance to see his son. His son was a definition of a spoiled brat and that was his deceased wife's fault, she treated them like children too long.

"Is it because of you?" Damon asked irritated, he didn't like when his father called him bambino patronizing him with the title.

"Plenty of things happen because of me in this city figlio" the older Salvatore said with cockiness. The truth was he had really no idea what his son was talking about.

"Rose and I have been on this list for an insemination for a long time but we always end up coming short father, and we moved try to get a surrogate mother but it was impossible, I assumed this is your way to punish me because I refused to work for the family." Damon said tired of playing these games.

Rose had been depressed with everything going on it was their fourth year of marriage and she had put pressure on herself to get a kid. Now that it was revealed that her ovules weren't viable she was getting more somber and somber with time, they had tried everything. Everything was to slow at this rate he didn't know if his wife would get through everything.

"Oh that is why it was taking so long for you to give me my grandchild. But I assure you I have nothing to do with whatever is going on. But if you need your Papa's help don't hesitate I will fix everything like I always do." Giuseppe had said knowing well that this was his way to get his son where he wanted.

"Whatever just stay out of this father" Damon said doubting his father's innocence. He stood and walked out of the office not considering his father proposal but two weeks later he was back begging for his father's help. Rose had been brought to the hospital for an overdose of sleeping pills which Damon suspected to be an attempt to her life. He didn't see a better option and a month later Giuseppe was delivering on his promise assuring Damon everything was made in a very legal way.

All Damon had to do was compromise and start taking case related to his father's business. That was how Damon has signed off his integrity, but also sealed Bonnie's fate. Giuseppe wanted it fast and he had the perfect young man who to clear his debt had already proposed his girlfriend on multiple occasions. That little piece of shit was just that a piece of shit. Giuseppe had never seen someone so worthless, initially the Italian man was against the involvement with people that had no debt to him, but right now she was getting off easy with just having to conceive a child. He already held her passport which the boy had gambled away.

The entire way to convince the girl, Bonnie Bennett she was called, was a plan from her boyfriend. Very inventive boy, few of his men had to threaten the boyfriend's life and he told her from there the girl would do anything they wanted and she did. Nine month later Damon was giving the money to his father thinking he had gone through a normal agency and just moved his name higher in the list.

* * *

"Day please, you really thought father would go through that complicated process, our father?" Stefan asked not believing for one second his brother could be so naïve and the look he saw across his brother's face he knew that at the time Damon didn't care and right now he wouldn't have cared if it was a different situation.

"Does she know? Does that woman know?" Stefan inquired worried it might change everything regarding Leila health.

"No she does not, I am not that stupid. And that's what I am worried about," the elder Salvatore replied passing his hand through his hair with his tired features.

"You better keep it that way and make sure she doesn't find out. We can't have this Damon, she's our last hope." Stefan insisted and his brother just sighed grabbing his jacket ready to leave the room. Damon needed air. "Where are you going?" he heard Stefan ask, but he really did know what to answer him because he didn't know where he was going.

"If anything his wrong with Leila please call me," he said as he crossed the threshold and left into the darkness looking for a reason to clear his head. Damon jumped inside his car and drove in the direction where his mind was stuck too. After what was about a three or four hour ride because he really needed to clear his mind, he was parking in front of a building. She didn't lie it was no place for children.

It was a very hyper Bar, one of those which are overly crowded and right now he really needed anything, but loud music and potential drunk people. But for the entire day he had felt the need to be around her maybe to ease his guilt. Having that laugh of hers creeping through his skin like a reminder that he took that away from her. Everything in that laugh had said repressed, it had become so much like a kiss to freedom, so pure and also scarlet as she has bled it. He had taken her happiness for the profit of someone who today couldn't give a second thought to the child she wanted so much.

He looked around for her really not knowing what he was doing there. His eyes finally found her and he had his answer, he needed to find her because he wanted to say it. He wanted to answer her just ease the guilt, have it go away. He walked toward her and grabbed her by the arm to swing her around. She gasped at his touched and was ready to bite him to defend herself because working in a bar wearing what she was wearing was dangerous; drunk people often lacked control.

She turned and dropped the hand ready to slap him down. She took him in and he looked a bit tormented, his hair was messy clearly combed by his fingers. He had on black sweat pants she had never pictured him as the type to wear those types of clothes and mostly inside this type of bar. He had dark royal blue Henley and on top a leather jacket. He was looking hot, like he looked literally hot in his Italian suit but right now he was giving her bad boy type of vibes.

This is the type of thing you need to stop doing, thinking of him as more than a paycheck. This building crush needs to go. She thought sadly, after today she definitely had a very tiny crush, she was not sure but he had been just a caring "asshole" and she was not used to caring anymore. The only other person who was nice to her was her grams. Since she had run away from the hospital because she literally ran trying to escape, her mind had shared focused between Leila, Leila's curls and smile much more than Damon.

She had not expected him to stop and listen, he never did. She had expected him to throw stones at her one more time, but instead he had asked if they could keep her and she wished she could have but all she knew was that she couldn't because she knew what he was asking for. And that was impossible but to those words—a tremor had run through her, words had disappeared, emotions had mingled before forming a gigantic melted bowl were everything disappeared. She had finally heard it a laugh, she didn't know where it came from but it needed to get out so she had laughed. She had thought about keeping them but she needed to let them go. So she kissed them bye.

* * *

She finally stopped checking him out but felt her mouth dry and she felt her heart speed up with anticipation what had mandated his presence in her working place. Is she okay, oh lord I hope she is okay the fear that overcame her almost made her puke. She put the plate she was holding on the nearest table and she looked at him bracing herself for the bad news.

"We can, we actually can," he simply said looking at her expecting she could guess the meaning behind those words.

"What? Damon what are you talking about." She asked a bit lost but relieved to know it had nothing to do with Leila.

"You asked if we can keep you and the answer is yes we can but only if you understand that I am not asking you to be her mother, she is not asking you to be her mother. All she wants is to be your friend out of Stefan and me she literally as no one. She has a mother, a bad one but still a mother but she has no friends." He looked at her to see if she was still following and all she did was staring at him.

"I won't force you but seriously how long can you go before your break, how long before she breaks. You both need healing and I really think only you can help each other. And don't tell me you don't deserve her because well I don't too, but I don't bother with that. So miss Bennett you can be a fool and beat yourself about it or grow the fuck up and try to heal that broken teenager. So I will ask again can she keep you?" he said it in one breath and she did nothing but hug him.

She quickly moved out of the hug. Right now she was overwhelmed and was standing in the middle of the crowd, but felt transported by his words. She could not guarantee that she had the strength to finish her healing process because she feared her healing might cost a great deal to Leila. Leila was making her way in her priorities and maybe she has never left that place but all she knew was maybe it was worth trying.

"Do you want a beer?" she asked and he looked at her with the uttermost surprise. "That's what I share with my friends or the ones I use to have. And I remember the question was can we keep you?" she finished answering his unsaid question.

"Bourbon, I prefer bourbon" she nodded and called another waitress after few minutes she was sitting next to him at the bar nursing a beer while he was sipping on his bourbon. Both were sitting in a comfortable silence.

* * *

 ** _Hope you like it and if you did tip the writer and review, follow, fav. Nourish the muse so I can update faster. Kisses my lovelies until the next chapter._**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Well I know it has been a long time since I updated this story but finally I succeeded in getting this chapter in the direction I wanted. Then it was too long and not all the parts matched so I had to break it down and all. However, hopefully it will please you and keep you entertained. So if you like this chapter review, follow fav or do all three of them. Tip your writer and don't hesitate to give your opinion.**_

 _I disclaim everything_

 _ **This chapter is beta by sc0rpio- karma, she has a new Bonnie centered story**_ _life happens_ which _ **is amazing you should check it**_

* * *

"Ouch, Grams," she shouted not expecting the pull. She put her hand on the still hot spot and clings on her Grams' knee. She sat back and prepared herself for more pulling, her Grams was untangling her hair and the old lady, as she liked to call her, had a heavy hand but never try to tell her that. She nestled her head more on the knee while the comb passed through her hair. She ground her teeth to fight another cry for mercy.

"Well if you didn't move so much and actually took care of them. I wouldn't have to pull; it'd be easy. Now hush you are too grown to be complaining while I'm combing your hair," she said giving another heartfelt pull while she removed the knot from the abundance of curls with a small smile. This never got old, this little family tradition. She hoped Bonnie would do the same when she had a family of her own even if she didn't believe she would be there to see it, she wished for her little girl to have that.

The lady cherished those moments when she could take care of her granddaughter because Bonnie never let anyone take care of her but she was the one killing herself taking care of everyone, she wished the young woman could be more selfish. For good measure, those were times when Bonnie was willing to talk because she had always been a closed soul, often her worries had to be pried out of her.

Sheila Bennett had been so worried about her little Bon recently; she dreaded the situation she put her granddaughter in. She hated knowing that her sickness had put her dream on hold; she had kept it a secret as long as she could; she knew only Bonnie would be willing to help. When finally, she had her first attack, it had proven itself to be true. Her too generous granddaughter flew over and just stopped her entire life again. Since then guilt had been plaguing the matriarch of the Bennett family and she had been afraid of the resentment that could be built toward her.

Recently Bonnie had taken a turn for the worse much like Sheila's health, she had never seen her granddaughter so guarded and depressed and the two last weeks had been the worse. She knew something was definitely wrong and she was craving to ask but didn't need to hear that her little Bon hated her because she couldn't run around on the biggest stage in the world like she was supposed to be.

It was hard to see the one you loved dying on inside and that was what was happening with Bonnie. She was dying in this small town where she couldn't express her talent and blossom as she deserved, and to Sheila, it was all her fault. The silence, the tears, the broken objects, she could hear them all through the thin walls separating their rooms. Her granddaughter was hurting, she was hurting badly and she was clueless as to the reason why.

Maybe it was all just too much for her; it would have been too much for anyone. The girl from day one had to always given up something for the sake of someone else. Therefore, it must have taken a toll on her. In all honesty, she thought it was time to send her back to New York, she knew that Bonnie staying here with her would not change the inevitable. She absentmindedly parted her granddaughter's hair and another of her little cry drew her attention back.

"Stop moving and you need to oil them more," she said to cover her lack of attention before starting to roll the Bantu knot.

"I am not moving Grams and I oil them every single day…" Bonnie said hesitating to add more. She was afraid that her grandmother might pull even more if she dared to say that she was the one pulling too much. Instead, she followed up with something else. "How do you do it? How did you get so good at it?"

A laugh erupted from Sheila's chest and she softened her movement to look at her little Bonnie. "Doing hair, really Bonnie I have taught you everything about it. How to take care of those split ends I am seeing and flattering me won't ease the process." She chuckled a bit but her hand on Bonnie's hair became lighter. The parting was less painful and Sheila was more interested in what Bonnie had to say.

"No Grams, not doing my hair obviously at that you are terrible!" a pull on Bonnie's hair punctuated that sentence and reminded her who she was talking too. "Ouch, Grams! No I was asking about how you become great at this mother thing, how you did it?" she asked a bit shyly. Sheila was the best maternal figure she knew. The lady had been a good mother to her daughters and an even greater mother to her. If she needed to ask anyone about mothering someone, Sheila was the best person to do so because, in no way, shape or form did she feel capable of being as caring with anyone as her grandmother was. On her first attempt she had failed, Leila had turned out great but it was no thanks to her.

* * *

She calmly waited for her Grams' answer because that was what had been worrying her since her late night conversation with Damon. How were they all amazing when I failed thirty minutes after her birth to be a decent mother? She remembered the little awkward conversation she had shared with the elder Salvatore. Soon it had turned into something warm and it had confused her even more. That night, two weeks ago, it happened, it had really happened. She had felt herself open up, she had never been open with anyone after Florence but he knew everything, there was nothing to hide with him.

She remembered the drunken daze, her eyes looking at him as if he hung the moon. She was crushing hard, she remembering drinking his words in. She remembered the soft kiss on her forehead, which was so vivid in her mind that the sensation still burned on her skin like a hot iron mark. She ghosted her hand on her forehead like she could still feel his lips lingering there or them whispering in her ear you will figure it out, I did pretty well I like to think and I was more of a mess before her.

He had moved the free curls behind her ears and had looked at her with so much intensity that it had burned through her. She had gasped when her eyes had dropped on his lips hungrily before he dived for a kiss on her cheek while telling her goodbye. She had wished for more, stunned by the effect he had on drunk her; she had let her hand roam on her cheek few minutes. She had breathed so slowly and felt the warmth inside her just from a stupid kiss on the cheek. She was worse than a teenager was; even as a teenager, a kiss on her cheek had never twisted her mind like that.

It was safe to say that after he left, she had been a ball of emotions and done nothing good during her shift. It had been so much to take in; he had come and offered her a chance to rekindle with the love of her life. She was willing to do so but she couldn't get a handle on the fear that surrounded her mind. She could barely live with the idea that she had given up on her years ago but now the known pressure of being active in her life was paralyzed her entire being. Even as a friend to the little curly head princess, she would still be capable of inflicting harm, and even in the most unwilling way she could still harm her.

So if it happened what she was supposed to do, if by the cruel hand of fate, she broke that little girl's like her mother did. No one would be there to pick her up like Gram did for her. Leila had a crappy mother, she didn't want to judge the woman but the simple fact that Damon was here on his own dealing with everything; nothing more needed to be added to tarnish the woman portrait. And there was herself and this ambiguous feeling she was developing toward Damon, just another reason to stay the furthest distance away from them. This conflict between what she wanted and what she needed to do was becoming too heavy for her.

At the beginning of this, she was already walking a dark path but right now, she was hiding and avoiding everyone. She was even hiding from her Grams because she wasn't willing to share and she had her secrets. She had been so distant with everyone that she was disconnected from everything; she was practically ghosting in her own life. She needed this situation taken care of and sorted out. When her gram came to check on her tonight she felt like a little girl again, she nestled her head on her chest and said nothing.

She held in the tears but cherished the contact. She appreciated the fact that Sheila asked for nothing and just gave her the love she needed at the time. Now she was sitting on the floor between her Grams legs while her hair was pulled in every direction but she wouldn't have it any other way. So she asked the most amazing woman she knew how she did it. How she fixed the mistakes of her mother?

* * *

"Are you pregnant? Darling are you pregnant?" That was Sheila's answer; she suspected that it was something big that had her baby girl closing herself off like that. She was suspicious with the recent visits she's been receiving and the way she made sure to never converse in the house and now this question. "Baby if that's what got you acting funny, don't worry about anything I am here." She said after putting more coconut oil on Bonnie's head.

"What? Nooooo Grams no! I am definitely not pregnant. I don't even have a boyfriend," she laughed in surprise and only shook her head at her grandmother wild imagination.

"So why are you asking. And who is that boy with the expensive car always pulling you out to talk." Sheila relayed her suspicions while Bonnie's turned to get a better glance at her grandmother. She thought she had done a good job making sure Sheila never noticed Damon but apparently, the old fox was sharp. Sheila could read the surprise on her granddaughter's pretty face. She laughed harder at the expression and continued rolling the hair.

"Oh Chile, you can't fool me, I wasn't born last night. I was young once and I too used to sneak out with boys but I was a lot younger, you passed that age, and they definitely had fewer shiny cars, which helped make everything unnoticeable. So are you pregnant because you have been acting weird lately?" She finally said happy that it was an opportunity to have Bonnie talk to her instead of shying away in that gloomy gray room of hers.

"I am not Grams but I might be one day. And I get so scared that I might be just like Abby. What if that little angel never has someone as amazing as you to fix what wrong I do. And it's true, I've been under the weather recently so I am sorry if I have been acting up but I will try my best to be okay." Bonnie said feeling bad that her emotions had taken over so much that she neglected to protect her grandmother from them.

She had grown quite good at hiding her feeling after Florence; it had taken an entire year for her family to notice that she was depressed but at the time, she was living with her dad, so it was easier to go unnoticed. Living with Rudy Hopkins was like living with a ghost, his presence always was furtive whilst her mother never cared enough and her friends were self-centered so hiding from them was definitely easier than from Sheila.

During that time, she had done her best to conceal her feelings in public. She had done such a good job that she had almost fooled herself until that fatidical day when all hell broke loose. It happened inside a shopping mall when she expected it the less when she thought she was over it. Then she was triggered, a piece of clothing, a pink onesie and a few minutes later after her brain had processed everything and shut down, she found herself in tears in a baby shop holding a baby onesie. It went so fast.

She had cried so much in it that it had been ruined. She had bought and put it inside the box where she kept everything in relation with the daughter she had given up. After that event, she knew she needed help; she couldn't survive that loss alone, so she had sought a psychiatrist and went in every day for a year. She still could feel that weight and the guilt but at least she would survive and she did.

But right now, she was seeking her grandmother's help, even if she didn't really know the reason behind. She was looking at Sheila hopeful that reason would come out of her wisdom.

"Well you are definitely not Abby; I raised you both so I know that and you dear will be an amazing mother. You were a mother to all those parasitic friends of yours until you decide to cut them out. Best decision you ever made and proof that you have common sense, you need that to raise someone." She said kissing her little girl temple before pursuing.

"And well to answer your question: by trying, you try your best and you don't stop trying at your first, second or third mistakes. But also don't let them fool you even with their cute smiles; you set them straight when it's needed. The rest you will pick it along the way." She finished and stood up to take a good look at the final result of her ministration.

"And she says I am bad at doing her hair." She hissed and grabbed the hair products, started walking toward the exit of Bonnie's room before stopping, "if staying here is making you unhappy darling. I want you to leave because I am no child of yours. You should go be a kid because you shouldn't have to deal with this mess. We are asking too much from you. So just tell me if you need to go, alright"

"Unhappy with you? Never," she smiled to her Grams while the lady was closing the door. She stood, went to her cupboard and pushed a lot of things aside until she reached her hidden compartment. She pulled the box out with a lot of effort, finally, she took it to her bed and opened it. She picked the little trinkets dedicated to her daughter. Recently she had added the scrunchy that she had kept after the hospital. She went through the box, there was a little beanie that had cover her head in the first hours of her life, the nurse had been generous enough to give it to her; the hospital tag that was now falling apart and plenty of other little things, her first ultrasound picture. The box was a little mausoleum.

You don't give up at the first, second, third mistakes. You try your best. She wasn't the best version of herself right now and maybe Leila deserved better, she surely deserved better, but she would try even if it meant being a good friend to Leila because she wasn't ready to be her mother and she even felt less than deserving. But she would try and if she could somehow bring back something beautiful out of her she would try, like Damon said she would heal both of them. She picked her phone and not caring about time or etiquette. She called him a bit apprehensively.

It was freaking two o'clock in the morning, who could be so inconsiderate? Damon had no plans on answering that call but when the person called back for the fourth time, it was a bit much. He gave up on the idea of ignoring it since well he was awake now. He picked the phone up and without a glance at the number, he growled and went ballistic on the person on the other side.

"You better have a fucking good reason to disturb me, so let me hear it," he said with a sleepy voice and in Italian. He expected it to be a transatlantic call for anyone to call at this time, nothing came from the other side except small breathing. She was trying to put her Italian knowledge back together it was rusty but she still could speak and understand.

She didn't expect it, she looked at her clock and noticed it was two o'clock. She had let her excitement convince her to call before she sobered up from the feeling that conversing with a Gram had left behind and actually chicken out again. But right now it was getting real and the future of her intent was materializing. Also, she was a bit scared of Damon, not in a frightened way more like I am not ready to deal with the other night, she started to look at him differently and she didn't like one bit where she was going with that.

She had her past and her last relationship hadn't set her on the path to look for more. Why are you even thinking about a relationship? The man barely acknowledges your presence and you have a stupid crush because well he looks like he looks. And now his sleepy voice and the way the Italian rolled on his tongue, definitely a mean crush. She was really doing a pitiful job right now if she wanted to try that thing with Leila; she didn't need to make the matter worse by falling for Damon. She breathed and just blurted it out.

"I want to try, I really want to try even if I am scared and I'll do my best to be a good friend. So I guess you can keep me." She profusely threw words at him in her not so good Italian. She was so stressed that she had answered in Italian, she wasn't sure of the words' order or if they make sense. In his sleepy state, only few words made sense but her voice was enough to wake him up.

"Look who has stopped hiding, I almost thought you lost your phone. You could have just said that you weren't in." He said with a cutting tone and back to English. He was a bit angry at her and she could hear it on the phone. She took a heavy breath and he didn't know why but he could make out the guilty puppy expression she was making behind her phone. But right now he couldn't bring himself to care because if he did, he will let her get away with her dysfunctional behavior.

He thought they had made progress, that she was more invest and willing. On top of that, in a very impossible way, he had slightly missed her, he refused to admit that he had missed someone he barely knew but he did miss her. Having Leila raving about Miss Bonnie this, Miss Bonnie that had not helped his case at all. It seemed the girl had for mission to make Miss Bonnie settle in his thoughts, not that he needed her help. What the daughter was doing the mother had succeeded by herself in simply the matter of one night.

* * *

Two freaking weeks, fourteen days and that impulsive night was still on his mind and it was a record because nothing was extremely memorable except the emotional exchange. The woman was precious when she lost her inhibition, Bonnie Bennett was the embodiment of purity and sadly he was one of the people that had happened to taint her white canvas. She was the single person he knew who was failing at being selfish. When she showed her real self, not the pale copy, the light was so attractive no mere mortal couldn't be undone.

I don't need the money; I will help her regardless. I had said yes to your proposition because I wanted to feel like you weren't using me because that is what the world does to me. They use me, he used me, over used me but for my princess with curly hair, it can't be that bad. So I don't need the money, I don't need to prove that I am, though. She had nodded and had looked at him satisfied. Three glasses of bourbon and she had started going off script; he hadn't needed to see her pouring her true nature but it just came out when the restraint broke.

She had layers and she pretended for the world, he saw her peel some of them while she kept the other fiercely. She had shed light where she wanted him to take a look, she had pulled him right in the center of her mind whilst hiding what was in the corner. She was mysterious, intriguing, alive and painfully human. No one could resist that, looking at that special part made him needy for more. He had wanted to be privy to her. That night out of nowhere she would share something with him.

He had never been on the receiving end of confidence except from his daughter and rarely Stefan. Much like their daughter, she had a tendency to say things and shyly look around. Spending time with her made him discover where some of the mannerisms he found adorable on his daughter came from. But on her they were everything but adorable, they seemed unique and the laugh was magisterial. She would tell him little secrets like she called them while her heavy lashes would charmingly move and drop on him. She would stay calm for a moment before innocently asking for something or blurted something like an epiphany.

Is that weird, I knew it. It is weird that I don't like butterflies. Why were they talking about butterflies? He couldn't remember at the time and now he still couldn't remember but they had talked about butterflies that night. He remembered the blush that had taken over after he agreed that she was weird. It was like looking at a teenager feeling humiliated in front of her crush. Using crush loosely because the one with the crush it was him clearly.

Say it, give me something embarrassing about you? I shared your turn. She had said excited while she had almost clung to his arm. When they had gotten so comfortable after the awkwardness of the first instant, she had moved from her seat that was facing him to the spot next to him onto the comfy leather sofa. Now she was so close that he could feel the heat emanating from her and it was distracting. She had looked at him with puppy-dog eyes and he had given in. How could he resist those eyes? They had melted his entire soul and turned him into something that she could mold easily to her will.

Well, I don't like olive oil, I can't... she had snorted clearly not satisfied cutting his explaining. Her hand had playfully slapped his arm. Then she used him as support to alleviate herself on the sofa, when she was tipsy Bonnie had no respect for personal space and she liked to be touchy. She sat closer than he expected with her legs folded on her side and her hands still holding his forearm and playing around. The contact had been electrifying, he had to remind himself who she was and it had helped a lot that night or he would have done something silly.

You're really not trying, how is not liking olive oil embarrassing? She had looked at him disapprovingly.

I am Italian, BonBon. Wow, he had given her a pet name; he never did that, only Leila had a pet name. His neurons had started firing and his brain had gone through ration and reason. Sorry, Bonnie. He had emphasized, she had come so close to his face just to subtly whisper, oh and then she chuckled like he had told her the most embarrassing thing in the world.

* * *

The night had made him cherish a beautiful stranger and also feel guilty that some shit in life had pushed this vibrant, living and selfless persona to hide behind a layer of complication. He had kissed her forehead protectively and quite the impulse in the moment. He was an impulsive being, had contemplated the idea of kissing her, passionately kissing her and drinking in her laugh. Impulsive like he said. When his eyes had dropped on her lips, the idea had grew strong.

The curls flowing in a cascade on her face because of the motion while she was laughing almost to tears. The curls, the same as his daughter, their daughter alright Leila's mom, the woman with the bone marrow, the woman who you stole her youth from. The same woman you can't even think about going after. His own reasoning had rudely brought him back to reality. He had been there to apologize not complicate the issue.

The alcohol was impairing his judgment later that what he had told himself. But gracefully he had settle for a kiss on her cheek before leaving her, he hadn't wanted to go but for the sake of his daughter and this beautiful soul he needed to go before falling into old Damon patterns. He could only mess someone's life once and he had done that to her life already.

It was a given his night had been plagued with Bonnie Bennett and the day had followed with Leila's never ending praise of the woman. The little girl was fascinated; she was holding dear on her chignon. It took an entire week to convince her to undo her hairstyle and another week to get her to shut up about seeing Miss Bonnie again, she had stopped on her own finally maybe giving up the hope to see her again.

He had tried to see her but Bonnie had ignored his calls and just hid away. Therefore, he was pissed, one day and she was already breaking his and his daughter's heart, maybe Stefan was right. So her calling him at two o'clock wasn't her best move. He would tell her what he thought, she wasn't stable it was a mistake to try to bring her in even if he was willing to right his wrong, she wasn't willing to do so with her. Maybe she was right Leila needed to be protected from her, she was maybe too broken, and his family might have gone too far.

* * *

"I'm sorry, I really I am sorry I have been stupid. Okay, I know it..." she started, she knew that he never imposed on her or anything but she had felt the pressure stronger than everything. So she did what she had done the best this last year: the ostrich. She had bent under pressure almost broke but Sheila. Without knowing, had done what Sheila did best: she had shown her what she needed to do.

"Bonnie sorry won't cut it. I tried to give you a bit of my trust and definitely, maybe I pushed for this too much." Damon said feeling like he couldn't let go of his little grudge but also he knew he had pushed a bit too fast. But he just felt like he could help amend his past mistake and she could be someone he saw behind the baggage she was carrying, behind the overlapping fear. So on one hand, he wanted her in for more than the surgery, blankly he wanted her for his personal interest On the other hand, he was mad that she made him feel like that.

She drew a bit of emotion out of him when he needed all his reason, Damon was a very calculated and emotionless, professional deformation but with her, well he didn't feel like he wanted to use her. He needed her at arm's length but he also wanted her close to Leila and slightly close to him. Two weeks and that was what had been going on in his mind. He needed to put Leila's best interest before his own but somehow he felt like adding Bonnie in that equation would blur the line between his needs and Leila's needs. That night the way he had looked at her, he was glad she wasn't obvious to it or more like she was too drunk to notice but maybe she had noticed and that was the reason she was hiding. That thought helped him calm down.

"First of all it's BonBon to you if I remember right," she said with a lack of confidence but that was what they both decided he should call her and she needed to smooth his edges. He chuckled, damn that little woman. She is playing low and dirty. Damon just knew he was about to let her get away with murder if she started using her cuteness against him just like she did during the little argument that led to the both of them agreeing that Bonbon was the way he would call her.

"And I am sorry, I definitely panicked because I felt like I would not do right by your trust and I'll be an awful friend to her … even to you. I know, you told me that I didn't need to be her mother, just her friends but even that it is really hard because I have been no one's friend recently. But I want to try, I can't promise I'll be super good at it and that is scary. But I promise I'll try my best to be a good friend to her," she said hesitantly and she waited for his answer but she remembered that she wanted to have something, "but also I promise to be a good friend to you because you also need one. Don't you?"

Did she just friend zone me he asked himself in disbelief that his thought would erase most of her words just to focus on that detail. But truthfully, at her first plea and apology she had been forgiven, he had given up. It was weird but that woman just softened him, he had noticed that being angry at her didn't last as much as he wanted. She had that fragility that was affecting him but at the same time, she was strong more than she gave herself credit for. He sighed and answered her

"What am I to make of your promise Bonbon? What are worth your words?" He asked just to play coy, he was already sold to her cause. Forgotten was his frustration, now he was just keeping her on the phone. He even sat straight on his bed and switched the light on.

"My actions should speak louder than my words, Day," she said noticing that he was warming up to her. She sat on her bed and continued talking to him but now he was silent as he was thinking.

"Day? That's already taken how I am to trust you'll be a good friend if you can come up with a decent nickname?" Damon snorted drifting back in the comfort zone they had found with each other. He felt at ease with her the other night and definitely, he was willing to be her friend. He couldn't be more than her friend, he knew it. Even when he was tempted to want more because she had that effect on him. But between them, there was a possible mess and there was Leila. He needed to shut every other idea down; it would be hard just talking to her seemed to influence him wrongfully.

She was laughing right now and he was wondering why her laugh had such effect on him. She would be his hardest friendship but she was also a friend that he needed right now. She was definitely right on that one. In that instant he made two very opposing choices, he was letting her in while locking her out. She was getting a pass to Leila that he had to monitor carefully but he just had this faith that she might be the best thing for his daughter. Also she was to be locked out of his mind and heart, she was trouble for him, definitely if her voice was having that effect on him.

"So we are friends again Damon," she emphasized the Damon offended that her pet name for him was taken.

"Yes Bonbon, we're friends…. only friends," the last part was almost a whisper in which he was letting go of his regrets but it was for the best. End it now before it escalates and becomes another Rose situation. She kept quiet for a second taking his last words in only friends, oh no he found out about her crush. She screamed interiorly, she blushed and she felt like he was clearing the air for her to get the message. She must have said something that night to tip him off, but well, the message was clear.

"Yep, friends …. only," she said agreeing for what she knew was the best but not really feeling satisfied. She didn't want him like that, at least she thought but still, she felt a tiny pang on her burgeoning little crush. It was for Leila, everything was for Leila. She had to try her best, her absolute best. Friends they both made a choice, Leila before anything, their princess, their daughter.

* * *

 _ **Oh, Damon had a crush too, I guess friends it is the way to go. I know I am taking my sweet time with them but everyone in this story need healing. Leila needs her mother, Bonnie needs her daughter and Damon, like Bonnie said, needs a friend. Bonnie more than anything needs to heal from her ex. So please bear with me longer. Now if you like this chapter review, fav, follow. Tip your writer and keep the muse happy. Kisses until the next time.**_


	9. Chapter 9

**_Well, I was a bit hesitant on posting an update for this story because well I really do not know if you are still reading. However, well some of you are super sweet for following, reviewing and giving your opinion so here it is. I hope it is a good read. Fav, follow and review to keep the muse interested._**

 ** _Beta by sc0rpi0 karma. Guy do check her bonnie story life happens_**

 ** _I disclaim everything._**

* * *

"Mama, I miss you. Are you coming to see me?" With the innocence of childhood where hope did not bother with the constraint of reality, she asked the same question she had asked a hundred times. Leila crossed her feet and started swinging them as her hand flew to her mouth. She started nibbling at her nails. She looked at her father—he had a less hopeful expression.

"Cara, I miss you too but mama can't come over there. Michele and Mateo…." Her mother offered a new pretext, if she had asked the question an incommensurable amount of times, rejection had followed each time. She looked at her father, her eyes turned glossy and tears started to take they usual position. She sniffed and took a deep breath, she could not cry, not with her dad in the room.

"You're okay, Principessa," Damon asked with worry coating his voice finally stepping in the room. He knew the answer to his question; she was not okay. All conversations with Rose ended in the same manner. It was an orchestrated routine. Every step fell together in a successive order like dominos. She would ask the question, Rose would offer some invalid reason, and a few minutes of uncomfortable babbling and eventually, his ex-wife would find an exit.

"I did nothing important, Dr. Fell was nice to me today, and she gave me candy. She said I was very brave…" she couldn't this time, her bravery had limits and they were crossed when Rose abruptly stopped the conversation, she had to tend to her younger son Michele. The tears fell and she wiped them as fast as she could. Her father stepped in the room; he swiped her from the bed and hugged her.

"It is okay, your papa is here." Guilt taking over him, Damon felt the need to smooth the blow—he felt the need to reassure his little princess that she always had him. He hated this moment, it happened every week but still, he let it happen repeatedly. He did not know how to tackle the situation, he talked to Rose and the woman, well the woman was one a bitch, two she was selfish. The audacity of all, the matter that pushed him through edges of unknown anger, was how she justified her actions.

" _Leila doesn't need to know how uncomfortable I am with her pain. She needs me to hide it, that's why I don't support those conversations centered on the situation_." How was he supposed to answer that? How could he explain what he already did? How was their daughter, his daughter having leukemia a situation?

Leila just nestled her head in his shoulder; he ran his hand through her coiled hair. He finally took the phone from her, he had to use a bit of force because she was holding it so tightly. It took a minute to get his phone back, angrily he threw the apparel on the couch and sat on her bed with her still clasping on him. In the silence, her sob echoed louder and his anger just grew stronger. This was so vicious; it was an endless cycle of misery. He had no way of stopping it, three months, twelve weeks, twelve calls. She had called twelves times, no she had called ten times. During the last month, she had missed two weeks in the row and he still remembered the cries during those two weeks, they were nearly as bad as when she called.

* * *

"Leila, hey Leila" him calling her name did nothing; she grabbed a fist full of his shirt and sobbed. She cried her eyes out, it was not helping that her breathing mechanism was weak. Only, the coughing regularly interrupted the sobs. She tried to stop it; she tried not to cry around her father. She could not stop it right now. She hugged her father tightly and a kiss fell on her curly mane. She just hugged tighter, her knuckles became white, she could not let go of him, and Damon was the only person she had not to share. He was the one she didn't have offended.

 _Don't say anything about the hospital. Don't talk about Dr. Fell. Don't hurt mama. Mama doesn't like it._ However, she had forgotten. How had she forgotten? She did her best but Rose asked her what she had done today, the next time she would lie. Leila was a bright little girl; she was intuitive and observed a lot. She happened to be too bright for the adult around her. She knew what subject to avoid with her mother, she did her best to avoid them but sometimes like tonight, she could not avoid it. _Papa said don't lie; papa was in the room._ She had to explain her day but her day was repetitive. They were hospital, sleep and when by any miracle she could manage to play for an hour then she would have something to tell.

She cried some more until Damon's voice echoed like despair to her ears. She cried until she started worrying about her father. If she knew that, her mother could not stomach her talking about the hospital. She also knew that her father could not stomach her crying. However, in the way they reacted, there was a difference. Damon would stay through the tears; Rose would run to one of her other children, Michele, Mateo it did not matter.

They always had more attention, if Michele or Mateo had a fever, a cough, her mother would be with them at the hospital. However, when she asked when it was her turn, her mama would say your daddy would go with you. She knew from that moment that she must have done something wrong. She tried to think about all the bad things she did and she became a better girl but still, it did not work. She asked again and her mama said the same thing that her papa would take her. _So maybe Michele and Mateo's papa could not take them_ but she was still jealous of Mateo and Michele because now when they were sick, they had both their parents. Therefore, she concluded she was still doing something wrong, she was hurting her mama and she stopped asking.

She swallowed her tears; she could not also lose her dad because she was not behaving the way he liked. He did not like when she cried, so she had no business in crying. She felt the tears burning her sclera, she felt the weight of sadness circling her heart but she had to stop, and she needed to stop. _You need to stop or you will make papa leave, just like mama does._ So with all her strength and helped by her fear, she stopped, she stopped so her dad would stay with her.

She moved her face away from her father shirt; she fought the remnant of tears and put on a brave face. She would not attempt to smile; she needed her full concentration to keep the tears at bay. She waited maybe two minutes, she waited until her eyes were dry enough to look at her father and she pushed her curls away. She bravely raised her eyes and she met her father's worried ones. She did not release his shirt, she still needed his strength and just a bit, she was trying to keep him with her.

"Sorry, Papa," she said, her voice was low and carried the weight of contrition. Damon broke; he did not know how to do this. He sat her on his lap and looked at her. He had not look at her recently, he was too worried to see what he was seeing right now. He had feared the pallor of her skin; he had feared the weight loss, the random pearls of blood sometimes tainting her skin but the sadness in her eyes, the confusion, and the worry, they were not supposed to be there. They were avoidable, he let that enter, and he let Rose put her in that state. How could he be a good father if he could not protect his child from her own mother?

"Oh, for what Cara, you have nothing to be sorry about." He looked at her deep into her eyes as he spoke; he smoothed his expression and hid the anguish in his voice. She was trembling still fighting the agitation in her but failing miserably.

"But I made you sad, and I don't want you to go because I make you sad," She whispered. She didn't daring look at him. She moved on his lap but she was still holding his shirt and with each minute, she held tighter. Her words nourished Damon's resentment; it fed his guilt also. He was not properly hiding his pain; he was not teaching her what mattered. If he knew Rose's behavior had an impact, he did nothing to correct them or even smoothed them over. He chose to spend his focus on the wrong target Rose; he did not clarify with his daughter that she did not have to expect those behaviors from everyone.

He lifted her chin and took her trembling hands in his. "Of course I am sad when you cry because I am your Papa, but I would be sadder if you don't cry when you need to. You can never make me sad to the point where I feel like leaving you. I would be sadder without you." He put his hand in her hair and started playing with her curl. His voice is warming up and his anger is disappearing, he continued, "did you ever leave me when you felt angry at me, when I made you sad?" she shook her head and he offered her a smile "why?"

"Because I love this much," extending both of her hand the further she could to show her amount of love, she said with a smile as she answered the smile her father was wearing.

"Then how can I leave when I love you like this big." Damon also extended his arms and Leila looked at the bigger space, she compared it with her own. She noticed that it was at least three times bigger than the quantity of love she offered. "Now that you know that your Papa will never, never leave you, do you still want to cry?" she nodded. "Then come, cry just right here and after we will get ice cream." He hugged her and waited for the tears to come back.

* * *

"Is this boy worth all the trouble, Chile?" she eyed the pile of clothes on Bonnie's floor; Sheila asked and sighed. The entire room was a mess, they were clothes everywhere and Bonnie was running from side to side. The old Lady entered the room and started picking clothes up from the floor. Bonnie grabbed a top from her arm and Sheila just rolled her eyes.

"It doesn't need to be a man; can't I just decide to take care of me and the way I dress up?" Bonnie countered, she looked in the mirror and the top she picked flew back to the floor. Sheila snorted and she sat on the bed. She started observing her granddaughter "Grams stop staring at me. You're making me nervous."

"You don't need me for that one, you're doing just fine by yourself. That boy would like you anyway, so just put anything on or better go naked." A small comforting smile formed on her lips as she said her peace, she stood and left the room on queue with Bonnie complaining.

The young Bennett wished it were only a date with a man; this was the most important date she ever had in her life. She was meeting Leila and stress was something she rightfully felt. She had not seen her since their encounter at the hospital and the previous conversation with Damon made her feel guilty. Stressing about what to wear was easier than stressing on what to say, or how to act.

What was the ideal conversation subject to engage in with a daughter that you are trying to befriend? Google hadn't had a range of answers, it seemed ridiculous but she needed answers. She wanted to ask her Grams but that wasn't an option, a clue on her situation was the last thing she wanted to let slip.

She looked at the clock and time was running fast; the last thing she wanted was to be late. She did not want to give Damon the impression that she was not dedicated, she promised she would do this fully. She picked a blouse and just threw it on. She looked around for her bag and just stop in the middle of the room. She was really going to do this, without a second thought _. What if she doesn't like me? What if she instinctively knows that I did something bad to her?_ Her head was so full of what ifs, she never felt so much bravery in acting against her blinding fear. She grabbed her bag and left the room, it was all about trying, learning and being reacquainted to the feeling of caring for others.

She took a deep breath and stepped out of her home, her comfort zone and her worries. _Baby steps and no giving up or running away._ She walked to her bus station and for the few first second, she calmly waited. However, with the time unfolding at a slow pace, the minutes pushing away the seconds, old thoughts settled back disturbing her comfort. Self-preservation fought his way back hard and few times, she glimpsed at the way leading back to her home. Through all of this process of decision, she only had thought about the effect on Leila but what about the effect on her.

With years, she made progress, she moved from the selfless little girl that had lost everything to the woman who could say no without feeling the need to explain it. _But after this would I be able to rebuild this armor and hide behind my wall?_ The nightmares, the emptiness, and the anger she had survived them all, she had outgrown them, the only feeling that had stayed all along was guilt and just maybe, and this could be a selfish act. Maybe, just maybe it was an act of contrition, the way from her to be free of the heavy guilt she had carried for six years with her. Was she using this child one more time or was it mutual help as Damon made it sound?

She looked one more time hesitant to continue, she stood from the bus stop and started walking away. However, the bus had arrived and she chose, she climbed those stairs and took the back seat. She looked at the moving house, her fading neighborhood and her hands were trembling but other than that, she had found some peace in her choice. By the time, she made it to Atlanta she would be fine, she hoped she would be.

* * *

She arrived earlier than she hoped; it was barely nine o'clock in the morning. Excitement and apprehension had pushed her to rush. She stared at the building for a moment and she did not know what to do. Was she supposed to go and come back? However, would she be capable of coming back if she left? She breathed in deeply, questions, and again questions they had stopped her long enough. It had taken too much to pass through them. She could not continue to be the stagnating person she was.

Braced in this new shield of bravery that she found in the desire to outgrow her resentment, she crossed the road and entered the building resolute to do her best. She walked up to the reception and announced that Damon was expecting her. The doorkeeper directed her toward the elevator and she was on her way to his floor. When the elevator beeped to announce the floor, she jumped out of her skin. One more time, she had been lost in her thoughts. She walked up to the door and she could not knock, she could not go away. She looked at the wooden door at a loss of purpose and sat on the corridor ground facing it. She had an hour to kill and it was enough to find the strength to go through to the original plan. She was not ready to go inside but she was not giving up. She huddled up against the wall and hid her head between her knees and her arms.

She could talk herself into it or he could talk her into it, she picked her phone and looked for Damon's number. He had known the right words the first time, he had known those words that had forced her to rethink the entire path she had taken six years ago but she dropped the phone. This time around, she wanted to be the one that found the words, she wanted to be the one that decided to give everything away. She did not want anyone convincing her to do anything, if she would do this, she would do this following some principle that she learned those six years. She made her decision, for her and only for her.

She chose to enter that bus, she chose to enter this building, and she chose to stay facing that door. When she would be ready, she would choose to knock on that door. She stared at the door and spoke softly _this time, there is no pretext to hide behind, I do not want to forget that she hurt me at the time; I don't want to forget the pain she caused. Maybe crossing this door will just mean that forgetting the hours passed remembering giving her up, the dark night were her baby cried brought a cold sweat on my forehead. Those are things and part of my life; I don't want to forget._

She stared at her phone and scrolled through her contact list, it was just a call away, another apology away but it would never end the conflict. Now that she knew her princess with the curly hair, the resentment was still there, the pain and the bit of anger were still there. What made her a stronger person, a person not at the mercy of anyone capable of igniting empathetic feeling in her; it was something she was not willing to lose. It might seem ridiculous to have an attachment to such pejorative sentiments but those sentiments kept her going.

However, she met her and it didn't change, she was still angry with her princess, at that man that caused it all but she had something new, something better. She had love, too much of it and she needed to express it. That was why she was sitting in this corridor; she was waiting for the moment until which she could reconcile her troubled mind and heart. She wasn't moving but she was not giving up. _Will do it on my time but I will do it._ The door opened and maybe she would not have her own time. She did not raise her head; she kept it hidden.

* * *

"Hey, miss are you okay? Do you need any help?" a voice with a very strong Italian accent asked but it was not Damon. She breathed a sigh of relief and finally raised her head. Her curls bounced in every direction, she had not straightened her hair as she often did and like that, she felt as if she had more in common with her daughter.

"I'm okay, you don't have to worry about it," she tried to sound as polite as she could, but she was out of it all. She pushed her curls away from her eyes and stared at the man, she frowned because the man was staring at her intensely.

"You need something?" now she was abrasive, he made her uncomfortable at the wrong time. She looked at him, really looked at him. He had some mannerism that reminded her of Damon. If it wasn't for his complete different appearance, she would have put it together before he spoke.

"The resemblance is striking; it goes up the single last curl." After examining every detail, Stefan said. He stared at her and saw as realization crossed her face that her features became sadder. The relief had left Bonnie, her choice of going in was removed, the time to think through it was removed. She looked at him a bit angry, she was angry and she needs something to canalize her anger but she kept her mouth shut.

"Can I talk to you?" Stefan asked. He was glad he found her, he was not happy with Damon letting someone that could be a threat to Leila in, he was convinced that his brother was being reckless. Leila's crying session last night had come up with Damon, Rose had come up and Bonnie too. Stefan was tired, he was angry. If it were up to him, he would have stopped the contact between Rose and Leila or at least reduced it; it _wasn't like there was much to reduce_. However, with this woman, he could put a stop to it before it even started.

"It seems I can't stop you to do it, so go ahead," Bonnie replied still angry, she stared at him in a very antagonized way. He barely cared; without any hesitation or care for his tailored suit, he sat next to her on the floor.

"You don't deserve your place near her; I don't think someone like you, willing to get paid to offer an organ deserves to have any contact with my niece." Stefan started; those were words, he wanted to say to all the women who were hurting his niece. He wanted to tell Rose that she never deserved her daughter. He knew he was being a bit rude and he had caught her in a confused state. He looked to his side waiting for her reaction but nothing followed. For a good half minute she said nothing, she stared at the door. She stood and knocked at the door. She turned to face Stefan; she looked down to have her eyes matching his.

"Well, it's a good thing I don't care about what you think." She said with a smile, her anger was gone; she had made her own decision. The words Stefan had thrown at her, she had told herself a thousand times, she still thought them but also they were not carved in stone. She came here, sat there because that was what she was trying to change. It was not her, Damon, Stefan whom could decide who deserved their place by Leila's side. It was not about deserving it; it was about earning it. Both Damon and he earned their places when they stayed, so she would earn hers.

"It's not your place to tell me if I deserve to be by her side, it is not Damon place too. I'm on your side on that one. I don't deserve anything from her, and I'm not asking anything from her. I should have said this to your brother but it seems this belief is going around. I'm not Rose, I ain't planning to be. Your anger and grief you take it up to her. Now when I give you material to come and tell me I don't deserve Leila, we can have this conversation." She knocked one more time and left a baffled Stefan.

He did not know what needed to be added, so he changed his approach, "just promise you won't hurt her." She turned to face him again; she extended her arm so he could hold her hand. She helped him up and when he was now standing taller than she was, she stood straighter and her greens irises confronted his green irises.

"I can't promise that and that's my biggest fear because I'm a bit on trial here, but I promise to try my best just like y'all do. By the end, I'd earn the right to claim that I deserve her like the rest of you. Is that enough for you?" her sincerity transcended her words and for the first time, Stefan smiled at her. He knocked on the door for her.

"Then I will keep an eye on you, so you don't make all the mistakes that we did," Stefan solemnly stated but his tone was warmer. He was not different from his brother; he felt the weight that the lack of maternal, feminine presence had on Leila. He was more protective than Damon was, but she was something this woman. He would definitely be more judgmental and careful. The fact that she stood up for herself and she had the honesty to speak some fear, now he had a slight respect for her.

"Thank you, I hope you do so but also thank you for having her back. By the way not that you need to know but I am not taking the money." She smiled and they both knocked at the door. It finally opened on a half-asleep Damon; he was rubbing the sleep away from his eyes. His eyes fell on Bonnie, then on his brother who of his humble opinion was standing too close to the woman.

"Stefano, Bonbon" Damon said, the young woman smiled at him but still there was no change in their stature. Stefan was still standing too close. "Everything is okay here, no one is asking anyone out right?" he asked in a joking tone, but it was a serious inquiry.

Bonnie moved away from Stefan to hug him; she was finally out of her stupor. She really needed to control the effect he had on her. Just his sleeping voice had rendered her speechless. _He isn't hugging back, okay awkward. You're moving too fast. He made it clearly friendship. Okay, but a hug is friendly._ She was now panicking; she was ready to remove her arm around his waist when his, flew around her neck. He pulled her into him; too sleepy to notice the intimacy of the gesture, he dropped a kiss on the crown of her head. She was feeding on the comfort from the hug. The way they felt instant comfort around each other after they drunk night, reflected right in front of Stefan's eyes.

The younger Salvatore coughed his embarrassment away; it drew their attention back and as a reflexive hand movement after contact with heat, they both rushed to drop their hand. Like teens whose parents had caught them doing something naughty, they both turned to face Stefan embarrassed. Bonnie's eyes dropped down, she avoided facing the Salvatore, whilst Damon was being Damon. He was being slightly territorial now that she was closer to him, he instinctively had taken one of Bonnie's curls in his fingers as he was speaking to Stefan.

* * *

"Stefano now that you finally met Bonbon, you can see she's way too small to be as dangerous as you thought," Damon sassed still feeling a bit angry with his Brother after their late night argument. In addition, maybe he was deliberately trying to make him look bad in front of Bonnie because he did not like the proximity he found them in. _So much for being just friends, if Stefan ends up snatching her._ He caught himself thinking and his hand left her hair. Bonnie had to put a hand in front of her mouth to stop the complaint cry that was ready to escape when he stopped playing with her hair.

 _You're lucky you stopped that one. Can he be a friend without tempting me? Sleepy voice, now my hair, I am trying here._ She complained in her head and brought herself back into the conversation.

"Well she is different, your Bonnie is different." With an emphasized on the "your", Stefan said echoing what Damon told him the first time he talked about Bonnie with a pejorative point of view. The "your" was in response to the not so subtle hint that Damon was dropping, he knew the sign of possessiveness display by his brother. He was yielding, and he already had a girl in this town. He walked away and left the pair.

"Can you and your daughter stop with your fascination with my size? Is being tiny a crime" Bonnie said a bit annoyed as she entered the apartment, she looked around excited to find Leila but she was nowhere to be found.

"Well, you are a small cute thing. It is hard not to be obsessed," it was a bit too late when the words became clear in his mind; they were out and luckily she did not notice the double meaning. He was about to correct himself when he noticed she was looking around.

"She is sleeping, yesterday was kind of complicated. Rose called and one thing leading to another, Leila cried maybe two hours. Now I am kind of afraid she might be cranky." Damon answered Bonnie silent question. She stopped a bit disappointed but the last part rather angered her, she could not even stomach the feeling that someone would make that happy little girl cry. She came near Damon and stood purposeless staring at nothing much. She found his presence reassuring and calming when they were not arguing. She did not know that Rose and a sinner wasn't allowed to judge when the sin was the same but she could not stop thinking that the woman was a bitch.

"Sorry, I probably chose the wrong time," Bonnie added and broke the silence. She was afraid she did pick the wrong time. If she was afraid to deal with a happy Leila, now she dreaded to deal with a cranky, sappy one. With Damon, her eyes seemed to have a conversation in which her brain was not privy

"You will be just fine Bonbon, no pressure right and if she gives you a bit of attitude it's nothing personal. I am mean almost three weeks." Damon said as he walked to a cupboard and pulled out a plastic box. "You coming," he said to Bonnie who was standing awkwardly straight. She was still processing Damon's words. She stepped out of her thoughts and followed behind him.

* * *

They stood in front of a door for a second and Damon looked at her. He was thinking that maybe this was a bit early. It might scare her; it had scared her mother. This little bird was already feeling so much pressure; he did not need to scare Bonnie more. However, if in the future he planned to let her spend time alone with Leila, she had to know how to do this. He was about to speak but she took the box from his hand, she has been taking care of grams long enough to know what a drug container was.

Damon opened the door; she timidly followed behind. The room was dark and she could not make out Leila's form under the pile of blankets. She could barely see in front of her, Damon offered his hand and she took it. The warmth of his palm was welcome; she had not noticed she was shivering until the heat of his skin clashed with the cold of her own. She tightened the grip on his hand and that stopped him. A look at her, he knew she understood that it would not be an easy thing. He had been doing it for months and he was still not used to it.

"You don't have to do it; look plenty of people are uncomfortable with sickness," Damon said trying to reassure her, his whispering tone hid a lot of warmth. She came closer to him and he could not really see her expression but it was all over the place. He took the container back from her.

"I googled the pills, their effect and now I feel like we are poisoning her. I know we are not doing it. But I can't say that the idea that even the process of stopping the pain is too painful to sit well with me. I am not uncomfortable with her sickness or I am but not in the way you mean it." Her words just echoed the feeling that he had every time he gave Leila those drugs' cocktails. It was instinctive, a search for comfort but he found himself hugging her one more time. He was thankful that someone could get his feeling. Chemotherapy drugs, the fact of choosing to give his daughter something as poisoning still hurt him even if there was no choice.

"If it helps, think that soon enough it will end. We just have to do it to keep her alive long enough to beat the biggest problem. I know it is not a big help." He whispered.

"How do you do this?" she asked in a voice equally low, she was on the verge of tearing up. She stepped in his quotidian, their quotidian and her concern for the little bundle of life she brought in this world, swallowed some of her fear suddenly. It was another truth that she wanted to ignore but she could not be blind or death to it. From the moment, Damon entered her life and she stopped to listen, she would have never walked away from this, even as far as her old self was dead, the part of her that mourned Leila never was silent. She had a mausoleum in her room for this daughter; whom she never thought she could meet again. Being with Leila was for her, the old and the new Bonnie.

"Don't ever show pity, hurt or worry, she has enough at it goes." She nodded to his words and took back the container. He put the light on and took a spot on Leila bed; he tapped so she could join him. She sat and Damon softly woke Leila up. The little girl took her time to emerge and effectively she was cranky. She was about to snort another time, whine.

* * *

"I just want to sleep papa, I am tired," she said, feeling every bone of her body burning but she held her pain. However, Damon knew she was in pain, it was the time, and her pills had fully worn off.

"Why don't you take this and then you can go back to sleep princess," Bonnie said, trying to get her to face them. The little girl stopped moving, she stayed silent and she was trying to clean her face. She just really liked Bonnie.

Without turning she finally decided to make her awareness acknowledge, "Is Miss Bonnie here?" she asked hopeful. She had been bugging Damon for days until she gave up. Therefore, she had a hard time believing Miss Bonnie was in her room.

"Hmm is Miss Bonnie here? Hmm, Bonbon are you here?" Damon teased and Bonnie followed "Well how would she see me, she refused to face us. Do you think Leila is mad at me?"

"A lot, I think" Damon replied and Leila shook her head, " a little bit maybe" she shook her head but Damon pursued " definitely a little bit, she is a little bit mad at you Bonbon."

"That is not true, Miss Bonnie" Leila quickly turned and Bonnie and Damon were both smiling at her. Bonnie came closer to her and passed her hand in her curls.

"I know princess. Your daddy here is a bad liar. But I am sorry I didn't come earlier. You're my big princess, I missed you. Do you want to give me kiss?" Bonnie said opening her arms. In that awkward timidity that took her around Bonnie, the little girl crawled in the open embrace. Bonnie almost squeezed too hard but she did her best to give some breathing room to her baby girl.

"So Leila, Bonbon here wants to help you take your pills. Can you help her do it Principessa?" dangling Bonnie like a sweet prize, Damon said with his charming voice. This would be an easy morning; if she cooperated in taking her pills, they might gain a half hour. Leila looked at both adults feeling the suspicious trap but she really wanted something in exchange.

"Can I call Miss Bonnie, Bonbon too after?" She said in her negotiating tone. Damon looked at Bonnie as if it was a tricked question. They faked a minute of cogitation and then both nodded.

"The song goes like this Bonbon. Blue like two blueberries. Red, all the red berries are yummy but those are three times yummier. White, no one has ever seen white berries, but there is plenty of white in this box and they go by one." She repeated one more time the order of her pills. The blue were corticosteroids against inflammation, the red were monoclonal antibodies. White was the chemotherapy medicine and they were five different types. In total, she had to take seven types of pills each with a different number of pills; the song mentioned the dosage. Leila was taught the song just in case of extreme emergency, she could do it on her own but Damon doubted such emergency possible.

Bonnie picked each pill and gave them in the order and the dosage. The little girl bravely took each of them but her facial expression gave a good idea of the taste. She started to appear already tired and a bit sleepy. She gripped at Bonnie, she did not want to miss the few hours she had with Bonnie because she was sleepy. She tried to stand from the bed but her feet were too fragile to hold her after thirty minutes. She sadly looks around her and already her vision was blurring, she started crying, "Daddy the light, they are going off again."

"They will come back on soon, Principessa."

"Now they are too strong, daddy it's painful." She said as the pills cause her to become photosensitive, she started getting agitated and Bonnie tried to maintain her on the bed, so she would not hurt herself.

Damon walked to the bathroom and picked the bin and tissues; it was only matter of time before she vomited the contents of her empty stomach and bled. Bonnie grabbed her hair and Damon accommodated their little girl.

The guttural sound of the bowl was hard to listen too for Damon and Bonnie, they barely looked at each other unwilling to see the sadness and worry in each other. She vomited for three minutes but it seemed longer to both her parents, Damon brought the cup of water and Bonnie made her drink it, she was opposed to it but she succeeded. Leila tried to stand, she really tried but she barely made her chest move. Her nose started bleeding, Bonnie took the tissue from Damon's hand, she was trembling but she cleaned it softly, her left hand was holding her right one in place. Damon checked the gum for bleeding too but they were clear. Silent felt in the room, Damon and Bonnie both stole a glance at each other, but still, they could not face one another.

"I want to play with Bonbon while she is here." Her weak crying voice echoed in the silent room, she started to close her eyes but she was fighting hard. Bonnie removed her shoes and entered the bed; she lay near her and pulled her into her embrace.

"Why don't I sleep here with you and then when we both Wake up in an hour or two, we can play as long as you want? I think your daddy will be okay with that." Bonnie looked at Damon and he only boarded them with the blanket. Leila fell asleep minutes later. Bonnie was so afraid of letting her go. She cradled her and her hand clasped so tightly around the small body. She was not letting her; she was never letting her go.

"Now you can do it," Damon whispered as he switched the light and came to sit near her. He put his arm around her "I am not looking, she is not looking, and no one is looking now you can do it."

"Is it when you do it when no one is looking?" she said through her first wave of tears. He said nothing he just held her tighter, as he would have wanted to be held the first time. The first time he put his daughter through that pain, he had been a mess, he understood. He dropped a kiss on Bonnie curls and let her tears wet his black t-shirt.

* * *

 ** _This chapter was a little bit centered around Leila's every day. That little girl is empathetic and well she scared of losing her parent affection and she feels a bit guilty about being sick. Well, Bonnie is going to help fix that mess, and maybe Damon will learn to cry when people are looking and Bonnie will reconcile all of her sides. Thanks for reading, reviewing, following, and putting on your fav. Kisses until the next chapter_**.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Thanks to all of view who reviewed, put in your favorite and follow. Mostly after last chapter and I hope it will continue and I will keep you entertain. So to all of you who are sweet enough to take a minute to leave comment, follow, fav this another chapter. It is an early update. So please review, fav and follow keep the muse interested.**_

 _ **I started this fic after an heated class of medical ethic on surrogacy, so just you know surrogacy is a beautiful thing when all party are invested, and it is made with interest of the child at heart.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything**_

 _ **Unbeta sorry if I missed some mistake**_

* * *

 _ **Florence a year and an half ago**_

"If you feel the need to break her heart so much, let the doctor handle it. They're overly qualified and will probably do a better job" Stefan gave her a side eye in response to the statement. The younger Salvatore did not understand what his brother still expect from that selfish bitch. He never liked her to start with but right now, he was comforted in his opinion. Damon passed his hands through his hair, he was exhausted and he was incapable to understand. Where did he go wrong with her? How was he supposed to get her more invested in the health of their daughter?

"Please correct me if I am wrong, you want our daughter, our precious child to have to sit through a conversation about her frightening medical condition with a stranger? You want her scared in a cold room, with medical appliance and listening to an overused speech. Rose do you hear yourself?" Damon raised his voice and Stefan glared at him, his younger brother was trying to buffer the tension and protect his niece. Ashamed from his growing loss of control, Damon let his head fall, and he faced the next room's entrance.

Leila was there waiting, he needed to hold his words and avoid scaring her. No more argument, he had promised his daughter to stop arguing with Rose.

"That is not what I mean. I am not able to do it yet. How are we supposed to explain cancer to a child? I think the best option will be to let the doctor handle it." Unwilling to go to the entanglement it was sure to be, the brunette girl argued. She looked at Damon and let her eyes lingered on his expression. She tried to emphasize her distress. He was not warming to her words, he did not understand. _Since when was he able to understand,_ she chastised herself.

"You really don't see anything wrong. You are not escaping it this time and you are running away from your maternal responsibility just because you have more functional children." Whispering angrily, Damon could not hide his rage. He was tired of her way of acting; it has been three weeks since they last visited the doctor. He had given her three weeks to make her peace with the situation; he has given her three weeks so she could get ready as she asked.

However, looking at his ex-wife, he felt resentful. He too was not ready but he did not get to ask for time to prepare. He did not promise her to be there when need arise and he obviously did not break said promise. He has called her every day, he has tried to console her, talked about their pain but she was out of it all. He suspected that she was making it all about her. It was always about her. She needed time to get use to their daughter coughing blood; she needed to cope with the fear of losing Leila. He gave her all of it, all the time she needed because he needed the same courtesy but knew he could not have that. He sympathized and understood.

He filled her empty spot at every visit but it did not change anything. It always had been about her, today, five years ago _. I need to get use to the idea that you will have a child with another woman. Yes, I wanted a child we could have adopted; you don't understand my feeling you can have children_. Those words echoed back to him. He took a deep breath and went to close the door.

"Is it because it is some other woman child? Is it because she is my blood and not yours? Is it because she is of no use to you now that you don't need her to hurt me anymore? What is it Rose? What is it, what change in her that now you can be a proper mother?" Damon delivered a flow of questions, He stared at his ex-wife, a woman who not so long ago he loved. With certainty, he knew one of those questions hid the truth. Those questions echoed her own words; it reflected the being who at time, he had come to hate.

He felt her finger parting from his cheek; he raised his hand to smooth the hot spot and soften the blow. He looked at her incredulous, she was furious. She slapped him another time and he let her do it. If it were her way of finally reacting to the situation then he would take it. If he could reach her, broke the shell she decided to hide behind by striking her pride then be it. Supposedly, Rose was the only other person who could understand his pain; she was supposed to suffer as he did.

Was it selfish that he wanted her by his side in this hell? All they had in common was gone, ravished by their own hands. However, during this time, he had no use of old pride, he had no use of old grudge. He needed someone who understood, Stefan with all is support could not understand. With all his love his, brother could not understand. She was their child, she was supposed to hurt, she was supposed to go through those painful visits too, and she was supposed to be there when their child needed reassurance.

"Those are all past facts; I have been over it for years, all of it. Not once, I have not been a good mom to her. Not once even when I was still dealing with the idea of having no child. I never asked you to go on your own and bring some baby but I pushed through with time. That is what I am asking, time. You are the one making up a fuss because I am not willing to break the new to her. Let the doctor do it or do it on your own. I am not ready, I am not comfortable." She shouted and as if the distance between them seemed to shrink, Damon took some steps back. They were no excuses for her words; it had not change at all. It had just become worse.

* * *

Three years after Leila birth, Damon and Rose broke up. However, this divorce should have happened earlier. They were two selfish people; they were immature, and they had no real idea of love. Having a kid had been an uncalculated move. It was a convenient desire for one party and an imposed desire to the other party. They were both a lying to each other. They both had hidden agenda. Damon wanted to appease Rose's pain and Rose wanted to stabilize her union with a child. Only she had hard time having one, she substituted her usual plan with a guilt trip for Damon.

In her misery, she dragged Damon, unconsciously or consciously she wanted him to hurt as she did. More than the genuine regret of children's absence, it was because of her bruise feminine ego as she was barren, consequently she felt depressed. Damon tried to help; Leila was the solution to detangle selfish adult's mess. However, at the difference of Damon who found salvation in fatherhood, Rose found bitterness in motherhood. If she could not have a child of her own, Damon having one even in her name, it was bittersweet.

As Leila clang at her for maternal affection, help her pull out of her depression, and kept her marriage floating she did develop affection for the child. It was something close to maternal just enough to fool herself, just enough to let herself believed that she was a mother. To support such life hardship as cancer, the affection had never been genuine enough. A through all her reasons she felt the need to share with herself or Damon; there was the truth that to her, Leila never felt like her child. Even when she believed the pretense, even as she believed it now, somewhere inside Leila was not her child.

Therefore, now that she had children of her own, no marriage to protect, and no reason to hurt Damon. Who was really Leila to her? She would never recognize the truth, she would never voice it to herself but she was another woman child, she was a device sometime. She liked to think that she loved Leila; she liked to think that she was a good person. Therefore, she could only pretend to love that child for everyone sake and that included herself.

Damon had no words left to fight; it was clear as day that he was on his own. He turned to Stefan and stoically stated, "Deal with her, I am tired and I needed to get done with..." he did not finish what he had to say and angrily left the room.

"You know the exit right?" Stefan asked to Rose and not taking the time to hear her response, he followed Damon. He found his older brother staring at the sofa, Damon's hand were shaking. Scared, he stared at Leila; it had no idea how to do this. Stefan put a hand on his shoulder and the gest did not draw Damon's attention. He was deep in thoughts, he felt alone, he was hurt and had no one to share the pain. He drew a deep breath and his hand tightened around the door, which he was still holding.

"I am going to help, if you will let me" he distantly heard Stefan say. He wanted to ask with what. Of what help could he be? _Will you fix her? Will you make my pain go? Will you sit by her and me when she will call upon her mother?_ Damon angrily thought. He was angry at his own fear, he was angry at his weakness. He was angry that he needed Rose but she could no pull through. He was afraid that maybe just maybe he would fail at being a good father. In few month, would he see her as a dysfunctional child? He could not believe he had implied that she was dysfunctional to Rose. He was so scared to fail her. He was angry even to have thoughts like that.

"I know my words mean nothing right now; I know I can't understand how you feel, so I will just be here for you and Leila. Day talk to me, brother I am right here okay." Through his brother dense wall, Stefan tried to reach him. He had no idea what to do, he could not wrap his head around everything but he was lucid about only one fact, Damon could not go through this alone. If the conversation with Rose had shed light on some truth, it was Damon and Leila were on their own. There were no need for further questions; there were no need to analyze anything, all Stefan knew was that his life would have to become second to his niece and his brother welfare.

"Then help me do this" Damon entered the room and sat to the sofa opposite to Leila. Stefan followed behind him and too much in edge to keep himself still; he stood next to his brother.

* * *

Leila was dusting off the white sofa but it was irremediably damaged. The little rascal took a second to raise her eyes. It did not look good for her. Uncle Stefan and her father, she crossed her hands and let them rest on her lap. She moved deeper in the sofa and looked at her pants full of dust. She sighed and shook like a little puppy to get her hair out of her face.

Stefan and Damon just stared _. She won't be like this in few months; it won't be like this in few weeks. She might not be here in a year._ Damon caught himself thinking, he felt tears heavily building around his eyelids. He felt sick to his guts. He stared at her through his teary eyes. His heart was slower than anything he could imagine possible. It was painfully contracting; it was getting too big for his chest. He felt it press against his mediastinum, he felt is respiration fall flat.

Words knocked over each other in her brain, there were too many words, not enough words. His throat was dry, his eyes were blurry and his tongue stuck against his palate. How was he supposed to say it? Cursed be the heaven, cursed his weakness, he needed to be a father. He needed to be her father. At loss of words, He stared at her and she became more uncomfortable under the scrutiny. Leila became so uncomfortable that she was in tears before Damon said anything.

"Sorry papa," she looked at the dirty sofa, she thought about the innumerable time Damon told her not to sit on the white sofa after playing outside. She looked at her appearance. After rolling on the grass, she had little leafs in her mane, her pants was dusty and her white t-shirt had his place in a trashcan. Sorry would not cut it but tears were a good option.

Her tears brought Damon back, he moved from opposite to next to her. He calmed her, assuring her that he was not mad; they would get a better sofa. The thirty minutes helped him collect himself; he glanced at Stefan and silently thanked him.

"Principessa, recently we have been going to the doctor a lot right?" struggling with the correct choice of word for her age, Damon tried to provide a context. Leila happily nodded once again getting her curls on her face, she fought with her little fingers to put everything back but it was an impossible mission, one would fall back to cover her face as she pushed another one. "Here" Damon said as he cleared all her hairs out the way. She thanked him and he stared again. He cleared his throat to push the lump away.

"Well the doctor this time had some bad news" he stopped to wait for her reaction but she barely focused on his word, she was still dusting her pants. "Leila" his word came out more commanding that he intended; stress had its way with his brain. She stopped and threw another guilty look. He felt worse than he thought was possible at that moment. "Papa is sorry"

"It's okay" she kissed his cheek, to show that she did take notice of it. She sat closer to him. He was staring again. He had the doctor's words ringing in the corner of his mind _she will have spontaneous bleeding in the gums sometimes_ he thought of her bright smile, it was so full of life; she could not lose that. He stared at her as if it was the last time he would ever see her like this _. She will lose a lot of weight because of the treatment and the cancer, it should not scare you when it starts happening._ She was already petite how much weight could she lose?

"So I was saying the doctor had bad news. You will be sick longer than we thought but you don't have to worry about it." He managed to say but his voice sounded unrecognizable to himself.

"Is it going to be like with Rafaelo?" Finally moving his eyes away from his niece, Stefan turned to face Damon. A sight of his brother was enough; he understood why she asked that. Rafaelo was Leila little rabid but also the reason why they had to explain death to her. Damon barely noticed that he was crying until a sob escaped his mouth when she asked him if she was dying. He could not talk, he could not hold his tears and he was stressing her.

"No Cara. Not like Rafaelo." Stefan took over because Damon was battling his emotion and was miserably failing. Between staring at her and crying, he was just succeeding in scaring her. Stefan moved to sit by Leila's left.

"So why is daddy crying, something is wrong with him too?" she asked a bit more worried, her arms flew around Damon, and she was trying to console him. She did her best to circle him with her little arms. She was second away to cry too and it was the only reason Damon was still attempting to stop. Stefan took a deep breath and turned to whisper words for his brother.

"Go get yourself together and only comeback when you can do this. I will explain to her."

Damon shook his head, _his daughter, and his responsibility_. He stopped crying. _What was he doing? He was failing her when she needed him to be her strong father._

"Daddy is sorry but I am just sad because I don't like to see you in pain. But I promise nothing will happen to you. Rafaelo did not have a daddy like me or an Uncle Stefan." He fought his way through words, he was not sure he believed what he was saying. She calmed herself and she nodded.

"You promise" she put her little finger up and he added his "I promise". That was the last time he allowed himself to appear so fragile, he had learned to navigate around his pain. He avoided dealing with it. She was his priority and he did not allow himself any breakdown. He just needed to keep his promise.

* * *

Bonnie had finally finished crying, her hand unclasped from Damon black t-shirt but of him, she did not let go. It was too early; the pain was still too strong, her heart was still bleeding out. Ashamed of her clinginess, she refused to face him; she refused to let him see her distress and her need for his support at the time. She sank deeper in the mattress but she still held his t-shirt. Her sob substituted by silent tears. When her right arm held Leila, her left arm let, go of Damon.

She rotated on her right to face Leila and her arms circled the little girl like a cocoon. The only reason, she did not tighten her grip was the fear of breaking her fragile bone. She was so fragilely beautiful, she was so small, a pocket angel. Looking at her sleeping calmed Bonnie better than any embrace did. She kissed the crown of her curly head. She was silent and her tears disappeared with every even breathing of Leila. Damon was silent next to her; he had made no move since she broke free of his embrace. He was observing her, he was a bit worried that she had to go through this but the fact that she had yet to run appeased him. She had done more in one day as a friend than the person who supposed to be there as a mother.

"Thank you and I know I have not a clue of how you feel or how to make it better. But if you ever need a moment to let it all out, take it." still not facing him, She whispered so low that she was not sure he heard her or the word crossed her lips. Her words' innuendos were not loss on him. The shoulder she offered him to cry, he did not know if he was willing to take. Being unheard for so long, he could not believe his pain sharable. It was an extended hand and he was free to take it.

He moved from his sitting position, he sank deeper in the bed and laid facing her back. The contact of skin was colder than he expected but the proximity of another hurt soul was warmer than he remembered. His nose sank in her curls and his arms flew around her waist. The contact seemed inappropriate but he could not share tears. She understood that, all he needed to know was that she was here for the sake of this moment. She slightly rotated and kissed his cheek, the contact of her lips and his cheek lingered in his mind longer than needed.

His hug became tighter, her hand slowly caressed his arm, and her touch smoothly dressed the wound inflicted today. He did not sob but he shed some tears. He was so silent; she said nothing because she knew this were no time to talk. He needed to let it out even just a few drop. Again, she kissed his cheek and gave him her back one more time. He did not allow her to look yet; he still had that little sense of shame. She was not even supposed to hear him.

However, the drops were falling on her curls; his nose was still engorging itself with the smell of coconut oil. Her hand guided his hand around her waist as she recovered it. She said nothing for minutes. She fought the desire burned in her due to his proximity. She had growing lust for him. When his chin moved from the crown of her head, she held her moan. Her heartfelt complain silenced as his chin nested in the crook of her neck. The warmth of his breath raised the hair on her neck, made her body shiver.

 _How were they supposed to keep this up? You can't stop the fall. There is the butterflies; there is the big bang nothing compared to how his touch felt._ She looked at Leila and she knew why the fall was not an option, the connection did not matter. Her arrhythmic heartbeat around him did not matter. They all needed each other. They all needed to be okay.

"She is going to be okay. You are going to be better. I know I am slightly okay. We are going to be okay right?" it was rhetorical, it was hopeful. Bonnie did not need him to answer; she did not want to stop his breakdown moment by words of consolation. However, it did not stop Damon to feel the good intent behind them. He had said this long before her but now he wanted to believe it.

"I promise, if you do too." Damon replied. She promised at her turn. They both stayed quiet. Bonnie fell asleep between Damon and Leila, she was hugging her daughter and he was hugging her until he fell asleep. They wasted almost half of the day in bed but compared to some of the day the trio had previously, it felt better than doing anything.

* * *

Leila was the first up, and when Leila was up, it meant everyone had to follow suit. She was half on top of Bonnie, and slightly pushing on Damon shoulder. She had been at it maybe thirty second. She shook Bonbon again but it seemed worse than trying to wake her daddy up. She laid in the middle of both sleeping body and looked at the roof. _How was she supposed to play if they both slept? But she was happy Bonbon kept her promise. She stayed._

She gave it a thought, she considered letting them sleep but it was not an option. "BONBON, PAPA, BONBON, PAPA" she shouted in rhythm, the little girl started jumping on the bed. After three jumps, she was slightly dizzy but it was enough to disturb the sleeping beauty that was her father.

"Inside voice, principessa, inside voice" Damon groaned as he sat and caught his little jumping rascal. She laughed when he ruffled her curls and Bonnie was still fast asleep. She was recovering from her nightshift at the bar and her stressful early morning. Leila rolled out of Damon hug and left the bed. She went around and bent at eye level with Bonnie's face.

"Papa, Bonbon is a princess," she stated as she was still staring at Bonnie. Damon rose from the bed and he chuckled at his daughter antics. What was the reasoning behind this conclusion?

"How do you know?" expecting the weirdest explaining, he asked and wanted to entertain her imagination. Knowing well his daughter and her need to build fantasy in this world just to go through her boring everyday routine.

"Well she is super pretty, she smells like flower, she is a dancer and she does not wake up," she said with certainty, she enumerated each of her points with a smug expression _. What could it be, she needed a prince to wake her up._ She turned to face her dad and she blurted out "papa do you know a prince? We need one to wake bonbon up"

To the last part Damon did not know if he needed to be offended that Bonnie was considered a princess and not him. He walked up to Leila and bent to face Bonnie too. Leila was right, she was beautiful _and you don't need to think about that_. It was really harder than what he thought this all friendship crap would be. She was ethereal, and it was hard just looking at her. _She came to his house looking like a candy; he was a man not_ _a monk. He surely has no vow of chastity_

Was he supposed to wake her up like a prince? _And make her run away as if your demonstration of fragility this morning was not enough._ He could not believe that he was about to follow through some of Leila's plan and he still did not believe that he had cried with another person in the room. Since he broke down and lost his composure with Leila sitting inch away, it had not happen again; even with Stefan, he was so afraid to share his load of pain.

He slightly shook Bonnie and she stretched, rolled in the other side of the bed. Leila looked at Damon with the "you see" expression. The elder Salvatore just shook Bonnie another time, finally she opened her eyes, and the first thing she saw was two pairs of identical irises. It was deep blue; it was like waking up to a frozen sky. She had no time to process anything and Leila was already babbling. She was nodding to everything; Damon lifted Leila from the floor and took her out of the room

"Let Bonbon clear her mind before you confused her more" Damon chastised but it barely stopped the babbling, Bonnie wanted to raise her hand to say it was fine but they were already out of reach.

The Bennett girl stood at the entrance of the living room, she was hesitant to move in. her hands gripping on the door, she looked around and her feet sank in the ground. She stared at Leila and her petite frame. She never thought she would have her fear coming alive but this was her biggest fear. Her daughter not being okay, she stared and she could take out the pain, she saw this morning. She had cried about it and still the weight was here. It felt as if the morning had made this entire situation very real. Pragmatism had found his way up her brain.

She had reached the caring point; she could not lie or fake anything. She cared so much; she cared maybe too much, surely more than she wanted. She could fight the invested feeling into those people's life but seemingly as she was set to lose that battle. When she was not falling for the father, she was just feeling her heart pledge allegiance and love to this beautiful little girl. She was so scared, she now felt the weight that paired with the perpetual state of anguish, which is associated with having a love one in the death row. Her hand tightened around the doorframe.

She needed to stare; she needed to have constant visual on Leila. She did not know how to do now; she never thought it would come so quick. She wanted a slow investment and she was really fighting the need to run out. She was fighting her feelings and the need to get lost into those peoples. She needed to install some emotional detachment and she needed to establish a healthy rapport to all of this. She could not get through this alone.

She made informed decision, and she would not renounce to them and her. _He is right you need to heal, and you need to learn your value._ She talked herself to calm down. Her problem was not that she was selfless; her problem was she had given herself no value. It was premature to think like that but somehow inside that little girl eyes and the slight sign of genuine love, she saw someone who valued her without expecting her to go to the moon and back. She was not rushing into it but she was just afraid to lose her daughter.

* * *

Damon noticed that she was staring and he came to stand next to her. He looked at her and he just understood. He put an arm around her shoulder. "She is not going anywhere you don't have to stare. I know, it is tempting to stare but if you stare just to see the wrong person. What is the point of it all?" he pursued. He had stared before and until he understood.

He needed to pass through the physical stigma of sickness. He needed to see her, his daughter. However, when he was staring and worrying about the weight loss, the fragility he was only seeing cancer. He missed what was still there, his daughter contagious laugh, her imagination and her future health.

"I just think she will break, crumble in front of my eyes or start bleeding. I just don't know how to do this. I know you expect me to jump right in and be a great mother even if you say you want me to be her friend." Damon tried to interrupt her but she gave him a warning glance and he just kept silent.

"I don't want that motherly relationship but it is here. I am having hard time adjusting; I can't hide pain like you do. I am having hard time just loving her, and now I have to love her with the possibility that I did not give enough when she was here. I sound confused, I am confused" she passed her hand in her curls and slightly moved out of Damon reach when he tried to comfort her. "I just need to go maybe today was too rushed, maybe I did it all wrong."

Damon moved to give her some space. Once again, she was staring at Leila and she felt the need to rush the relationship, just in case there were no tomorrow but if there were no tomorrow she wanted the slight detachment just to survive the loss.

"She will be fine, you will be better and I am already doing better. This morning I cried with another person in the room; I am doing better. This morning she made a friend and she convinces that her friend is a princess; she is already doing better…" he did not finish his words and she pursued for him.

"This morning I made a choice to cross this door; I held my promise to an amazing girl. This morning I have started to fall in love with an amazing person, she is six and thinks I am a princess. I'm already doing better. She will be fine, you will be better and we all will be better. If you promise, I promise." His thumbs were already clearing her tears away. She was maybe confused but she was better.

He looked at her and he was tempted to kiss. He was tempted just to cross this line because this morning he started falling for an amazing person.

Why _there is everything to lose? Why was he the reason she was this broken? Why could he not stop the fall?_ His thought were troubled, his interests were mixing. She was all the trouble he did not needed but everything he wanted. With minutes, hours, days Bonnie Bennett was temptation to a redeemed sinner. She was the mother of his child, she was the woman in love with his child _and how long could he slow the fall?_

" _I promise_ " he replied.

* * *

 _ **Chapter ago people said Damon was being too hard on Bonnie. well when a child is sick, it affected the parent worse than it affected the child himself and if like Damon, you are all on your own you look for connection, some to project on the other parent. Stefan is there but it will never be enough. Loss is better understand by someone who have an equivalent loss. Damon needed someone just to acknowledge his pain for a second, someone whose word were heavily filled with understanding. I hope I finally conveyed that this time around. Please review, follow and fav.**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**This came up earlier than I thought but here is another update. Thanks you for the reviews, I don't replied to them personally because I mostly use my phone and also have very little free time but I read them all . So thank you. Thanks for following, putting your favorite. I hope that this chapter will please you. review, follow and fav.**_

* * *

He had been in this room multiple times. However, right now everything seemed different; his perception changed by the anguish. The wall seemingly constricted around him. He looked at the empty chair next to him, the last piece of comfort gone; pushed to the side just as she had left it in her rushed exit.

The chaise was still warm, his hand was still warm but Bonnie was gone. The embrace of their finger broken, left behind was his empty hand still elongated. She had rushed out of doctor Fell's office without even an explaining. She had muttered an apology and she was on her toes leaving through the door, the same door he was staring at helpless.

 _Were all the progress they did erased in a fraction of second? Did I push further than she was ready to go?_ The elder Salvatore knew she was fragile; she was still adjusting to their new arrangement. Trial and error period was stressful to her. There were those days when she was just perfect with Leila and there were those other days when she seemed out of it all.

Out of life itself, at lost or in a battle with her inner self, those were rare days but she faked happiness through them. It was a game of push and pull with her. _Was he tired of pulling, did he need to stop pulling._ He had the intention to run after her; he had the intention to help her cope with the entirety of their situation. _Never could I be tired even when I need to face some truths._

Week of constant visit was a hardship; the brunette woman did her best to push her apprehension aside. She came every morning with a smile even just for a second; she left every time a happy soul behind her. She was getting a grip at it; she was forging a strong bond with Leila. Maybe it was too fast for both girls but it was effortless. _Was the sickness accelerating the process or was it the long lasting regret on Bonnie's side?_ Damon could not explain and took no time thinking about it. He did not think further about her willing help until he found himself alone in this office.

Did everything echo with the fear she was trying to hide? He could only assumed. The change were subtle but they were there. She would be slightly awkward around him; did I push her too far? Did I let it all show at the wrong time? Damon wished he could pin point all he did wrong because he did his part of wrong. He was trying his best just to see her as the woman who would help Leila, Leila's mother and a friend. However, he could not stop stealing glance at her when he thought she did not look.

He tried his best to keep his feeling at bay. He fought to restrain his flirty comments but sometimes between shared comfort, words escaped their enclave and their meaning became known only when he heard them aloud or when on her ethereal face little discomfort appeared. His words made her distant, his touch sometime scared her or so he thought.

 _Did I go too far this morning?_ He could not answer that question because as much he attempted to fight it. Lines between them were blurred; the level of intimacy was far greater than in normal stranger that shoved together. The shared pain, the growing attraction and the desire to fight only strengthened attachment they had to each other. Thrown in a demanding bond without their prior consent, they could try to break apart but hurt was never far. _How far could he go?_

What was far at this point? An innocuous touch was never harmless when it came to her. Her touch electrified him; the warmth of her fingers on his skin ignited visceral response from was organic, raw and frustrating. He was alert of her presence, asked more of her touch. The untold ruled that forced the platonic character of the relationship only made it worse. The need he felt to lure her in his waiting arms grew stronger with each barrier he arose to fight, with each forbidding rules they silent set.

* * *

In the past days, her need to distance herself from him made him eager to invade her privacy, to invade her space. It was risky business but he seemed to have his control slip away. _Maybe was he only now paying for it_? Her constant physical presence around him and the forced restrain, the cocktail of it all led to the moment they shared on their way to this place. Maybe the buildup of it all had led to her running away; maybe it had allowed her finally to decide on what her mind could not establish. She was not ready for all of it; _she had chosen to run_.

He attempting to kiss her was a mistake. From the timing, to the reason, an overall mistake he should have avoided. He should have abstain himself to do much dent in a fragile relation. However, it had felt right at that moment, it was impulsively right. Was it the feeling that came after being reacquainted to her, reacquainted to her comforting words? After a long period of cold shoulder, it felt the need to take it all even, what he should have let go. Was it what pushed him to follow a fluttering impulse? He wished he regretted all of it, the course of action that led to the moment when his hand flew on their own accord to the side of her face.

He did not regret staring at the tantalizing green of her eyes; he saw the desire, her lust for him. He saw what she hid better than he did. What they felt for each other was the barrier to their much-needed relation. They had to collaborate while staying apart. So maybe after her comforting words, his attempt to kiss her in the car broke it all. After she so easily found the word to extinguish his anguish, maybe his attempt to kiss her broke the fragile equilibrium of it all.

He could not tell but what he could tell was that during this entire week, she had been in a sort of limbo. She was tired, she was alone and she was closing herself to him and only him. Whatever how much effort she put in pretending for Leila's sake, he was not blind. Was it the fact that the test result were coming out? Was it all the option that will be lost if she was incompatible? She had a great fear to lose Leila. Nevertheless, she had made no peace with the length she needed to go just to save that one child.

If Leila and she were incompatible, was she able to go once again against personal interest? Was she able potentially to conceive another child? They had not talk about it and they were supposed to do so right now, the time she had chosen to escape. _Was it; was it that fear to be trapped in another vicious circle? Did he misjudge her love for his daughter, her daughter? Was he able to require that sacrifice from her? Yes, I would have asked. I would have selfishly ask her to save my daughter._ He answered himself but it arose other questions. If he was selfish enough to make her lose that. Why would she not make a selfish choice? _She had literally ran_.

He wanted to go after her. He was decided to go after her but the entrance of doctor fell stopped him from doing so. The large envelop she was holding brought him back to the prior reason of their presence in the office. He focused his attention back on the woman in front of him. For an instant forgetting about the one whom had shrunk under the weight of responsibilities.

Doctor fell spoke a great deal but Damon seemed to have a case of selected hearing. At the end of it all, he could only remember those words _well I have rather great news and I am happy finally to have one for you. Miss Bennett is at a large percentage compatible._ She had tried to explain more about the matter. Shared some technicality of the procedure, but his head was so stuck at positive results also the fact that Bonnie might be lost to them.

"I would have love for Miss Bennett to be here. It would have been useful to establish her preoperative period." Doctor Fell pursued. Damon did not known what to say nor how to explain her absence. Therefore, silence was safe. She had been there and then she was gone. She had been willing and then he did not know what had cause her change of mind. Nevertheless, she had rushed through the door without saying anything. He could only assume.

* * *

It felt like she had been running the entirety of this day. _Did it ever end? Did life stop throwing shit her way?_ Bonnie did not know. When she thought she was getting a grip at life, she was knock off her feet again. She was running from a hospital corridor to another. She was running from a sick bed to another. She was running, she was speeding but it seemed she never did it fast enough. She entered the cardiology department frantic; she had left the pediatric oncology department to be by Sheila side. It was unexpected like everything in her life. She was barely holding on. She saw the receptionist and walked up to her.

"Hi, I am looking for Miss Sheila Bennett. I have received the information that she has been brought here after a cardiac arrest." She stated between her little tremor and her broken voice. She had cried on her way to the hospital; her voice was still rusty and her eyes watery. She had a death grip on her phone. She was still in shock. She had read that text a dozen of times. The words still made no real sense, much more like when she left Damon side speechless and panicked.

"Room 428." The receptionist replied, she pointed toward the door at the beginning of the corridor. She gave more instructions but they all flew over the excessively emotional girl. She ran through the door, her heart was breaking _. She should have been there; she should have been with her grandmother. It was already happening._ She started thinking. She had hard time juggling between her lives.

She had the hardest time balancing her life. Now she felt so absorbed with the Salvatore household that she had neglected what mattered. She was doing it again; other people problems started to consume her recklessly. Was she being unfair with her perception? Yes but it could be forgiven, she was in shock and afraid. Few hours ago, she was reassuring Damon, she has no single thoughts about her grams well-being. Now she was even scared to cross the door and found the woman in another heartbreaking position.

This was what she intended when she talked about not disturbing her life. She felt guilty, she felt like she had neglected Sheila. However the young woman did not do such thing, she was finding a well-suited escape for her fear. She wanted this to be her big sign, it was supposed to be the proof that she was on the wrong path again. Nevertheless, Sheila predicament was inevitable; the brave Lady was suffering from ventricular fibrillation.

Today was her second heart attack in a year; she needed a surgical operation but could not go through such because of her repeated myocardial infarctions. She was practically on her last breath. If it were not today, it would be the next cardiac arrest or the following. Bonnie knew that, Sheila knew it and even all of the care in the word could not stop fatality. However, she needed to find a focus for everything.

She had hard time adjusting to her second life. Leila was a buy one get two other free. If it was easy to navigate around Leila, it was natural. It was less easy to do so with Damon; she had to go at crosscurrent of everything she felt. She was trying to maintain him at arm's length, interacting with him brought that languishment. She was trying the friendship thing, but she found herself stealing glance at him.

She found herself wishing to fix everything wrong around him. It was what she tempted to avert. Her previous relation's characteristics were an ugly reminder coming to haunt her. She was so much afraid. How she felt toward Damon was wrong. She pushed against her own self; she was tired of battling herself. She was breaking; now hiding seemed like the decent solution. She was extremely awkward around him but again she could avoid what she let out sometime but she did not.

* * *

Her hands running on his skin were there should not be running. The constant need of contact, the burning sensation the lack of it brought. The stolen stares should not carry the weight of her beating heart. The reaction to his tone of voice, the little goose bumps that responded to the most innocent of his touch, she feared those. He brought up fragility. Fragility she fought so hard to hide and bury. He and Leila made her feel like she could aspire to a family, this family. They clouded her vision when she knew that one morning they would be on the next plane to Florence.

She was just trying to protect herself; she was fleeing the danger. Distance was not enough. The morning scene in the car had shown it. She was running away from his grip but she was set to be the friend Leila needed, she was set to be that good mother that was why she had walked in that office ready to do everything if those result were not positive. Even now that she was here, her heart was unable to forget completely about those results.

Was she ready to have another child if she was not compatible? Truth be told, she had no real answer to that. She wanted to be able to say no. however, whom was she lying to? She was not the woman who was cold and selfish. Only yesterday, she was that person. That cold person whim with only a regretful thought as consequence might have left that estranged daughter die. She was fragile in a new way; she was caring in a new way. She was afraid it would happen and _it happened, did it not happen if you are here thinking about giving your carrier away for her._

She regretfully left doctor Fell; she only left because she read the message after ignoring multiple calls. She could have been here by her Gram's side earlier. She could have been careful about how she took her pills. However, from all she could have done, she should not have made the Salvatore household a priority.

In fairness, she had not do such but she wanted a culprit, she wanted to blame someone. She wanted reason to coerce her heart into resistance not abandonment.

So much laid behind her reaction. She felt guilty and around Leila, the guilt was stronger. She wanted to compensate and she gave everything. She did not think she deserved another chance, she was on her way to acceptation of what life was offering right now but she was not quite there. The intimacy, the spontaneous affection the little curly hair princess showed her was unexplained. She wanted hardship; she wanted punishment so her cocoon of disillusion would preserved her. She was used to inner death and now feeling was painful. _They did that to you, they weakened me._

From hurt, from the new sleepless night or the tears that she shed every time she had been the one giving Leila the pills, from those they were no protection. The Salvatore were removing her shell and she had not given them the permission to do so. _They were not allowed to do as they wish; they were not allowed to prey on her vulnerability and lied to her than they will fix everything._ She was so willing to believe in the world, which they built in that bubble of new emotion they created. She was not willing to be exposed nor to be a dreamer again. Now it was simple survival, she was grasping on straws and anything to vilify her effort was good. She was quite not forgetting herself.

Stefan was one of the reason behind her anger too. He was the only one who made her feel less uncomfortable. His resistance to her ironically help her. She could project on him. He was the only one who begrudged her for abandoning Leila and with time, he was less grudging more helping. They were scaring her; she was scared of the loss. She was doing so much to show her willingness that it exhausted her. She had promised herself that she would not fall back in those habits. _However, that family made her do it._

* * *

For the fourth time, her phone ringed and there were no need to read the caller, it was Damon. She did not want the interaction. She did not want him to make her fragile. She did not want to run in his arm to share her pain because he made her feel safe. Now she wanted to be alone and angry. She wanted to punish herself for neglecting her Grams. She wanted to find a reason to look into Damon's eyes and not feel as she felt. She wanted to look at Leila and not feel as if they asked for her life in exchange on her precious one; she would give it in a heartbeat.

For almost six hours she had been at Sheila's side, finally, the woman was coming around and Bonnie ended her silent prayers. The cardiologist had assured her that it was simply a mini-stroke this time. It was a weird thing to minimize such thing but it was better than a full attack. She had eaten nothing the entire day and her eyes were hurting from all the tears shed.

"I am so sorry, I am so sorry Grams," at the second Sheila's eyes were fully open; she blurted out her apology. Words were not fast enough to convey her feeling of relief and her guilt. The woman weakly raised her hand to stop her granddaughter's effusion of emotion. "I should have been there; I have been the absolute worse." Bonnie pursued but in a very painful effort, Sheila took her hands comfort. Now that she was able to breathe on her own, the poor woman needed to have her laryngeal tube removed.

The medical staff ushered Bonnie out of the room. Her phone ringed another time and she shut it down. She did not want it, she did not need their care and she did not want them to break her and remodel her. That was what she felt like they were doing to her. It was hard to accept it because once someone tried to do the same; it was not in her favor. She had lost trust and they were making her trust them. She was so afraid of the faith she was putting on them.

Right now, she wanted the solitude, the pain to influence her. She knew somewhere it was unfair and it was a form of cowardice. However her judgment was impaired, the amount of bottled up feeling confused her. Some fears were justified, other were old demons. They were unfounded, the almost kiss just shattered what was left. Her need of resistance to what she felt, the desire of known comfort clouded her judgement. An accident with Sheila health was enough. She felt the need to go back to her survival mode.

She sat in the row of chair installed in the hospital corridor. She was very close of Sheila's room and she was tired. She was mentally exhausted, she was barely reasonable. A hand on her shoulder alerted her of someone else presence. Her body instinctive reaction and the mental wall going up told her who it was. She raised her eyes to meet dashing blue and the rest of the Salvatore clan. A look and they undid all her resolve, her thoughts nothing more than plot construction of a scared and terrified mind that grasped on anything.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Bonnie asked with a hint of surprise in her voice. She did not expect him to materialize out of her thoughts; she did not want this secret life to overlap her real one, the life that would stay once they are gone. Maybe that was her problem, she wanted to live her lies on the side, keep Leila as part of an idealistic dream. However, having them in this hospital was complicated.

She looked at the entire Salvatore clan, _what was this supposed to be_? Right now, she was in the in-between of emotional stages. She was worried and distress. She could not deal with any of this. Stefan gave her a quiet smile; he gave a lot of those. She was not quite used to his judging expression and she had to live with a lot of those recently. He whispered something into Damon's ear and left.

She stared at her sweet baby girl, whom was holding Damon's arm tightly. She wanted to be able to be her mother, her mother and just to appease her daughter, erased this stressed and painful expression. However, with the entirety of her will focused on attempting, she still could not. Right now she was just Bonnie Bennett, almost tearing apart, scared for her Grams. Sheila was awake but she was far from okay. It was sad to think like this but she wished only to have one family member in the death row. She could not convince herself that recently she had been there for her grams, so she evidently blamed her news choices.

She focused her attention on Damon. He seemed to be the only one at whom she could direct his anger. He had convinced her to invest herself in this relationship with Leila. He had made her face her feeling for him. He was complicating her life; he was pulling her back into all her wrong habits. He made her fragile; it scared her. It made her angry, blindly angry.

"What are you doing here?" she repeated herself with a more cutting tone. She was purposefully antagonizing him. She felt the need to push him away. She had no strength to push Leila away but she could do so with Damon.

"Well it was supposed to be an emotional confrontation in front of your home, with me telling you how much of an awful person you are or how I made a mistake but now it will look stupid." Bonnie frowned at those words. Before coming here, Damon had been to Bonnie's home and thanks to a very noisy neighbor, he had found out the truth. He had rushed to the hospital dragging his brother and a very tired Leila. He had made some needed introspection on his way to the hospital and the result were not in his favor.

Bonnie was exhausted, she was angry and his words made her angrier. _Is he ever satisfied? What is that I can give him so he can see past my previous mistakes?_ She hated to think like this but somehow Damon could make her feel like this. She was afraid of thinking like this; that was how old Bonnie used to think. That was how young Bonnie ended up losing for others profit.

She was in the mood for an argument; she was feeling lonely and she needed someone to blame. She was projecting her anger, even when she attempted so hard to hide it. Damon could read it all over her. The elder Salvatore put Leila on the seat next to Bonnie; just close enough for Leila's presence to have a buffer effect on the woman.

"Why don't you hug Bonbon, right now she needs it?" Damon asked his daughter. The little girl wrapped in her arm a little less reactive Bonnie. The Bennett girl was quite hesitant but she quickly reciprocated the warm embrace. It did have the effect Damon expected.

* * *

"Thank you sweet angel" Bonnie did her best not to tear up. The affection Leila manifested toward her was what she needed to undo her rough mental barrier. She tightened her arm around the little girl and let a bit of her unshed tears flow out.

"Principessa why don't you wait here for a second so your uncle Stefan can bring your ice cream. I would just be there talking with Bonbon" Damon said as he extended his hand for Bonnie to take. Sadly letting go of the first sort of comfort that she received the entire day; she reluctantly broke her embrace with Leila. She unwillingly took Damon's hand, after his introduction she was not sure this conversation would lead to nothing but argument.

"What are you doing here?" her exasperation and anger never leaving her, she asked. Not knowing what was coming out of his mouth next, she stared at him bracing herself for the force.

"I already told you this was supposed to be an emotional confrontation. I was planning to tell you hurtful things that I should tell my ex. However, I would have done so with you because it would have been easy. Because my words would have weighted on your consciousness." To picture the mix of emotion coloring her face, he did not need to look at her.

"If it is what you are planning to do then you picked the wrong day, the wrong hour and the wrong person. I already explained this to your brother and will do the same with you. I am not and will never be Rose." She almost shouted at him. She was tired and angry at the comparison. She was giving everything, every single emotion to this family. She was hours away when her grandmother was having a heart attack because somehow she was once again doing it all wrong.

"No I am not planning that. However, we still need an emotional confrontation on how you're probably the most stupid amazing person on this earth. Whatever how amazing you are; it does not change how stupid you also are…" he could not pursued that sentence, a low hiss stopped him.

"Damon…" she whispered his name in warning. He looked at her and he was not afraid, she could take a go at him. He was ready for what she had to say. He came here to let her say it.

"Stupid, I clearly am. I'm bending backward to make it right with Leila, with you and even with Stefan. It was seven years ago, seven years and your judgement should not matter. I should not have to sacrifice me in process of pleasing any of you. I could have been there when she had her attack but I was with you, trying to prove that seven ago was a mistake. I was trying to prove that I could be a good mother." Letting her emotion show made her head span; she stopped to take a deep breath. Letting all the worries, which came out recently made her feel dizzy and light headed.

She looked at Damon and he was smiling. _What was so funny to him? Was she a joke to him?_ She came so close to him that she was stealing his air. She stared at his eyes, his beautiful conscious cobalt irises. She monopolized his attention; she commanded his attention before she said what she had to say.

"I am a good mother, I made a mistake but it brought her in this world and in your life. You should be grateful. I have my cross to bear and will do so. I am going to take care of who is mine Leila and grams. Therefore, you will accept how I do it and not put your standard of perfection on me because some woman failed you. I am exhausted, I can't mule for you, and I can't only be of so much help. You will take what I have to offer or go your way." She finished and was ready to walk away from him. Her point made, she tried to move back but his hand immobilized her.

"Glad you could tell these words to yourself because I definitely don't need to hear them. I know them. I am stupid too, I am projecting my hurt on your fragility and unfortunately, you let me do so. You are stupid if you think I can't see your worth and Stefan is not apt to judge such. You have no one to impress but yourself and I am angry that you think you have to put everything aside to amend something, which you alone perceive as a sin." He raised a finger in front of his lips to silence a protest from her.

* * *

He did not finish speaking; he knew that he had been in the wrong. He knew his fears in relation with Rose and her behavior were flawing this burgeoning relation. He had just felt it earlier; he needed to fix his trouble on his own. However, Bonnie had taken the mission to do it for him. He could see it, he had felt and had not spoken on it. Why had he not spoken on it? _You're selfish; she made it all feel better? Your friend, she gave more in weeks than some offered you in a lifetime_.

He had dropped the load, which so long he had carry alone on her and she had been willing to pick up. Self-construct martyr, Bonnie Bennett was, but just right now she had told him no. she had said no to his pain and decided to carry her own pain. It was beautiful; it was well-intended selfishness if such could exist.

"You make it so easy to forget that you have a life of your own. You make it so easy to ask the moon from you because somehow I know you will come through. However, you make it so hard to be your friend. You want me to cry on your shoulder, you want me to show my pain, and to let you take some of it with you. But when is your pain, you run and hide." She did not know where all the tears were coming from but her hands were not fast enough to wipe all of them. She did not need a pick in her psychic right now. She did not need him acknowledging truth that she refused to accept. She did not need that emotional confrontation.

"You pretend that there is no pain at all. Arguing make it so easy, does it not make it easy screaming at me right now? You are stupidly amazing and selfless. You can't blame the world every time someone takes advantage of you when you let him or her do it. You can't blame me to abuse overly my side of this friendship when you won't let me be there for you. As I'm blaming myself because I came here as a selfish bastard but now I'm going to hug you and probably do something stupid."

He pulled her closer, erasing the left space between them. Her breath died in the hardship of her respiration. His hand freed the last restrain he still had on her and she did not attempt to move. The surrealism of the moment paralyzed their thoughts. Their breaths were labored; the heat they felt was a little artifice create by the tension surrounding their frozen body. It was a stupid thing to do but he need to do so. He was resigned.

* * *

Bonnie felt the change in the air; she barely had her emotions in check. Butterflies that is what you are supposed to feel. She tried to explain the feeling in her abdomen but the flutter in her heart rhythm. The little premature beat of her heart that help compensate for the halts the sacred organ was making as he so intensely stared inside the enchanting forest which inhabited her orbs. How was she supposed to explain it?

The warmth beneath his thumbs as they amorously traveled her soft skin and made each inch of it hitched for more. How was she supposed to explain it? She had no answer just apprehension and an internal conflict, which was quickly squashed.

His lips softly covered hers before she could form a protest. It was soft, the touch was tender but it lacked not of passion. She instinctively encircled his body with her greedy arms. Their restrain desire collided and he deepened the kiss in response. Their body tightly clasped together, the liberty taken to cross a defense line aflame their soul.

Bonnie moaned and opened her mouth to allow access to his tongue. He greedily took the opportunity and as a snake, he charmed his way into her mouth. His tongue darted and she braced herself for his passion. Between kisses, she tried to steal a glimpse of reason.

"Damon… we can't" he took advantage of the opening of her mouth to start a devilish Paso

Doble. His tongue taking control, circling her as a bull circled a toreador.

"We are sharing truth and this how I truly feel" he kissed her more passionately, drinking from her as if she was the fountain of youth or held the charm to his dear life on the tip of her tongue.

"Damon ..." she insisted between moans and he silenced her each time with a more passionate tongue joust.

"I'm going to be a friend but just needed to do something stupid, selfish and take it out of my chest before I put the greater good on a pedestal" she nodded and ending their selfish stolen moment, they broke apart after a kiss full of languishment, forbidden desire and weight of parental constraint. They both silently agreed and walked back to find Stefan sitting where they had left Leila.

Bonnie quickly looked around for the little girl but she only turned back to Stefan. The little princess was nowhere to be found. _What were they saying about being great parent?_ She already started looking worried. Damon was the first to voice the question.

"Where is Leila?" he seemed as worried as Bonnie and that contradicted Stefan calm stance. The younger Salvatore who still held Leila ice cream, which profusely melted in his hand, just indicated a room. Damon was not surprised his daughter had the wrong habit of wondering in hospital corridor. He was almost relaxed until he noticed Bonnie expression. The petite woman was livid. After reading _428_ in last attempt to dissuade herself of her dark thought,

She turned such an accusatory look on Stefan. He felt the need to explain or justified why he had left it happen. He almost apologetically explained. "First of all I found her in the room, so where were you? Second of all, she has found a very sweet old lady and they are in the midst of a great conversation, I had no heart to break that and Sheila was comfortable with Leila around."

* * *

 _ **The kiss does not mean everything but it also does not mean nothing. How would they deal now that impulsive Damon did something impulsive? Do not worry about Sheila too much, the muse love the Lady. well Bonnie secret is a walking one, breathing one so it was only fitting for Leila to reveal herself to Grams**_


	12. Chapter 12

_**Thanks for reviewing, following and adding to your fav. This is another chapter hope you will like it. review, fav and follow.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything**_

 _ **It is unbeta so sorry**_

* * *

Voices were heard through the door but she could not distinguished clear words. The unknown and the lack of control on the situation fueled her anguish. Some secrets were to be told early before time fed them darker motivations, made them uglier and erased the innocent attempt to protect a weakened dignity. Other secrets due the weight they carried and the ugliness they masked should be buried with death. Bonnie's secret was a mix of both, it was all innocent, but time changed it all.

Shame, fear to disappoint, the undesired to hear the "I told you so" were few of the reasons, which pushed her to hold on to her omission. Time, missed occasion, the weight each year brought on to it, all reason enough to continue the lie. It was never the right moment, _and when it was the right time, I never had the right words._ It was never about words or lack of it in this matter. It was about judgement. _What will she think of me? Will I be another disappointment like Abby?_ As she was staring at the door and waiting to have an ounce of strength to push it, she asked herself repeatedly how Sheila would look at her.

Sheila had always been her rock; she was a mother, a listener and a loving person. Bonnie knew all of that so well. However, when time had come to seek her help, she had kept quiet and carried her pain alone. The darkest place in which her mind had found refuge did not allow her to be open on her predicament. She was not ready to risk her relationship with her Grams over her compromising secret, she was not ready seven years ago, _I am not sure I am ready to do so right now._

 _He ain't no good; baby girl he is only trouble._ Sheila's words echoed back in her mind stronger that they did seven years ago, when ready to leave for her amazing Italian trip; she was carrying her luggage out of their family home. She should have listened to wiser than she was. She could have listened to the point made by her grandmother but the arrogance of youth was never to be underestimated.

 _Grams it is different, he is different. This is different and I love him._ She had replied so sure of it. She had been sure of her love for him until the big fall out, she had been sure of those words for years until in a second he undid everything _. I was stupid_ ; no, she was young and hopeful. Young enough to know love but barely old enough to understand it. Sheila words haunted her for years; the unheard warming woke her up at night. The shame, it was the reason she kept it secret, the ego was the reason she kept it secret _. Grams told me, she told me over and over he was no good._

 _You're a kid; I can't just let you go run with every young boy who promises you the moon. Words are just that, words_. Her grams had been right all along, her next words had contained truth that she should have understood. _Lies are told every day, they vanished but the hurt left behind never. How long until he put you in danger? I won't be there baby. Please I want your ass down of this cab or I would drag you myself._ Threats Sheila had made a lot of those and for a second she had won. Bonnie had gave up just long enough to bypass her grandmother. Forbidden loves always hold some unknown charm.

So after the theatrics, after the dramatic how could she tell the entire truth? She had come back to disappointed eyes; she had no strength, no courage to pass through the first mistake. What if the truth costed her the only person in the world who cared about her. Therefore, she hid the truth, she preserved her ego, she preserved her image, and she sacrificed her mental well-being in exchange. She could barely live with her own resentment, disappointment.

How could she live if what she felt looking at herself each morning inhabited Sheila's eyes? Eyes who only contained love for her, eyes who even at her worse never looked at her other way that the brightest jewel of the crown. She had lost so much; she could not lose that bit of peace. Therefore, she omitted an entire complicated year of her life. After all, it would never come to light and her baby girl was lost to her. She could only lose much.

* * *

She stared at the door silently; she lets the noise scare her. She felt her hand shaking as it came closer to the wooden structure. She was dyspneic, she was sweating, and her heart had stopped. Were those chuckles and laughs she was hearing? She was not curious to find out; she was in no rush to come across Miss Sheila's judging, scolding eyes.

She let her hand trail on the door, she let her sweaty fingers glued themselves on the eroding paints. She drew a breath but it was useless, air did no good except making her lack of breath worse. _One… two…three forget about it, not today not right now._ She was ready to turn on her feet and go the opposite direction.

She was not ready; she was not able to go through this. Losing Sheila would be her downfall, and she was already on the ground, hell was next. She slowly removed her hand, she tried to unglued her feet, and she almost succeeded as a hand passed right in front her nose and opened the door widely. She turned to face whoever had just signed on her death certificate and her green eyes met innocent blue ones.

 _Damon Salvatore self-appointed destroyer of my life._ Half-jokingly, she thought it. She tried to keep her little anger at bay and refused to face her Grams. She was not going to her executioner willingly; she unconsciously closed the distance between her and Damon. She was ready to use him as a shield.

"That is a complicated and awfully long word chile" through the little pain in her chest, Sheila did her best to laugh. She forcefully repeated, "Arrive…derci," she looked at Leila and was meet by a concerned frown.

"Arrivederci" the little princess repeated emphasizing the accent; she had spent half an hour trying to teach basic Italian to Sheila. However it was going nowhere because the little girl was not a very patient teacher and Sheila was simply entertaining her. They had spent an hour together; Leila had run out of fairy tales and now had moved on language after Sheila indicated that she had a charming accent. A little singing voice, the old woman could hear that little angel talked for years and she did talk for years.

* * *

Italy just enough to confirm the theory forming in her brain, there was no detective's work needed as the door opened and that little girl carelessly walked into the room. She had taken every possible features; it was as if Sheila faced a ghost from the past. Her little granddaughter. Exempt the blue eyes, which were magnificent and ate half of her face, everything else screamed Bonnie Bennett. From the uniqueness of the chin, _not so unique because they were two now_ , the humongous curls falling on her back as her face was left free for Sheila to observe.

She had a knit half ponytail _at least she has been taking care of her hair_. After the minutes of shock, it was the thought that crossed her mind; _her granddaughter was not letting this cute baby walking around with her baby hair not laid_. It was a trivial thought but she was keeping the serious one for Bonnie and she was still trying to put the entire story together.

She only had assumptions and a bunch of questions. She assumed this was Bonnie's daughter, the uncanny similarities, which also applied to their shared petite height. She was a mirror image, probably her granddaughter's daughter with unfortunately that young destructive boy.

"Hey there" Sheila deep thoughts were broken by Leila singing voice. The little girl stood between the open door and the room. She was shyly holding the door waiting for an answer. She curiously looked around, slightly amazed by the number of appliances.

"Oh..." the Lady sounded startle; it was a bit of an impulsive reaction. Once the silence broken there were no ways for Sheila to deny the realism of this surrealist situation. For a moment it could have been wishful thinking, after all she was in her deathbed and had always wanted to see her great grandkid. _A woman was allowed delusion, stop being dramatic. Definitely not dying today and letting this slide._

The reaction undid Leila's courage and she was ready to run out of the door. "Hello sweet child" Sheila caught herself right on time. She had quickly noticed the little step back and she was not willing to let this little girl go. How much time she had missed; _Hun; hun now that she was right there with this very cute face, she was stepping in._

"Where are your parents, chile? Hospitals are not pretty places for children. They are quite boring."

"Oh I go a lot to the hospital, do you leave here?" she pointed to the bed on which Sheila was laying, completely forgetting to answer the previous question.

"Just moved in for a little while." Sheila answered with a little chuckled, Leila entered further in the room. Her eyes continued eyeing the different medical appliances. Her eyes laid on an electrocardiogram and for a moment, she kept her attention locked on the bip. She slowly made her way toward the bed until her hand landed on the mattress. She stood near Sheila with very concern eyes, she added "sorry, I will stay until you go home so it is not boring" she smiled and stood their quietly. She assumed a little while would mean an hour or two like her hospital visit. She was quite impatiently moving her feet around.

Sheila tapped on the bed to indicate that she could come up and Leila struggled a bit but she was up in matter of minutes swinging her leg, which were not touching the floor. "Your parent will be worried if you stayed with an old lady" Sheila replied, smiling at her kind offer.

"Daddy is speaking with bonbon, so I have to wait "finally answering on the whereabouts of her parents, the little girl replied.

"Bonbon?" just for confirmation purpose Sheila asked, she had quite an idea who was bonbon.

"Miss Bonnie, my friend princess. Have you ever meet a princess?" she asked innocently. Princesses and fairy tales were her new obsession. Sheila wore her most serious expression and she gracefully smiled

"Oh Chile, with my hair done and wearing something less blue, I am definitely a I have meet Princesses."

Leila was so impressed; she looked at Sheila and definitely could believe it.

"So why are you roaming in hospital corridor? I will have some word with your parent. Letting such a sweet girl alone."

"Hmmmm... since you are queen. Well I can tell you I am an angel" she was so serious that it commanded respect.

"Really and I would have assumed you were a fairy." Leila shook her head dismissive.

"I am too big to be a fairy but I have angel power, which is the same." The little girl explained confidently. She smiled brightly still following her awkward reasoning.

"You have proof of that little girl. And ain't you a bit early to visit me, I have no rush to go to heaven." Sheila sassed then she was laughing at the little girl cute thinking expression. This was a setback. How was she supposed to prove that woman that she was an angel? This was her big test. She crossed her arm and sat in a yogi position.

"Aww that is a... I know how I could show you. "She offered extremely confident. She put her hands together. She could do it; it was easy.

"OH DEAR I can't wait to see that, a real angel." Sheila was excessively happy to oblige to anything she would come up with. She had not had such a laugh in months. She laughed again and Leila smiled as if she had won a big price.

"Done!" She pointed a Sheila's smile "daddy say if you can make some laugh when they are sad or bored you are an angel. You just laugh Miss Sheila." She was so proud of herself. She smiled until her ears and Sheila continued laughing. There was no flaw on this little girl logic.

"Indeed, that was amazing. You are the brightest tool in the box." Sheila commented.

"I am not a tool miss Sheila" having no knowledge of the expression, Leila complained. She pouted for a second.

"sorry the brightest angel, chile." Sheila corrected herself.

"Grazie, for correcting your mistake" she said imitating her English teacher. She rose her chin and did her best to say the sentence without stammering on the hard words

"Gra...zie, oh Grazie" Sheila repeated, her Italian pronunciation was awful. She butchered the words to Leila's despair.

"Grazie miss Sheila with all your mouth" she sounded so serious, she was wearing a severe expression, but it was extremely cute.

"Hmmm you have turned into some teacher now, okay fancy angel" Sheila mocked but repeated the word as Leila wanted it.

That was how Bonnie found them, Leila playing teacher and Sheila being a disobedient student.

* * *

Similar to her suspended emotions, the time had stop moving around her. She had no words to describe how she felt. She had no way to explain the cheerful waves that washed away her anguish. She did not dare to step in the room. She was afraid to interrupt the moment. She had never imagined how much of impact this scene would have on her. This was the most beautiful thing she had never seen. It was surrealist; it was something she had never dared wish for all those years.

The smooth interaction between two people who she cherished. It was awkwardly overwhelming her. It was so strange, it lifted a small portion of the weight she had always carried, a bit of her guilt was gone. It lifted a bit of the pressure she was carrying around every day. It did not feel like she thought it would, it felt like freedom.

She looked at them, Leila dramatically passing her hands in her hair, displaying so much frustration. The little girl was enjoying playing teacher, she scolded with such a cute tone. She crossed her arms and waited for Sheila to repeat one more time and this time the woman did it to perfection. The little claps were so cheerful that Bonnie was afraid she might hurt her palms.

Sheila offered a bright smile and it stole bits of Bonnie's heart. She wished words had come to her easily but in the same time what would have been the point of telling her about a granddaughter whom she would never meet. Sheila burst in a laugh after Leila started giving homework, she stopped to frown and Sheila quickly stopped laughing but it was hard. It was quasi impossible because that little sunshine kept coming with very eccentric ideas. She finally finished and laid next to Sheila.

She was talking about all and everything; it went from the last cartoon she watched to the color of the ceiling. She started explaining why she wanted a blue ceiling; she wished people could have the sky inside their hospital rooms. All long Bonnie made herself small; she made no movement. She just looked; she fed her eyes from that magical moment. She barely felt Damon passed her; he only entered her visual frame when he was standing next to Leila and Sheila.

* * *

"Leila we have already talked about this. Didn't we?" Damon kept his tone on the scolding side. It was so used to finding her in other patient's room that he did not know why he kept this charade up. In Doctor Fell department Leila was the most beloved patient, she was always full of life. She felt comfortable with other sick people because she did not have the same relationship with sickness.

"Papa, this is miss Sheila" she completely ignored the question and she smiled to Damon. Sheila became curious; she looked at Damon's eyes and relief washed over her. _At least she did not make a child with that fool._ However, everything became a complicated puzzled, she had already noticed the man. _It is the boy whom got her sneaking out of the house_.

"I am sorry if Leila disturbed you, this little rascal has the bad habit of finding her way to other people's rooms." Damon politely apologized as he ruffled Leila's hair. The little girl sat up and frowned a bit.

"That's all fine; she is just doing her job. She is an angel." Sheila winked at Leila but the little girl was already bolting out of the bed. She ran toward the door when she saw Bonnie. BUSTED that was all, Bonnie's brain screamed. Leila grabbed her hand and was already dragging her inside the room.

"Miss Sheila. This is bonbon." She happily said and then placed her hand in front of her mouth so only Sheila could see "the princess." The woman just smiled and threw a quick glance at Bonnie whom was hiding her face. She had her head down. _She better acts like she is ashamed of herself_. Sheila was angry, she was disappointed and most of all she was lost. She knew there must be a story behind that would make her curse and embarrassed herself in front of the lord.

"I know Bonbon, she is my granddaughter. I told you I was a queen now do you believe me. Leila quickly nodded "chile why don't you take a seat." Sheila talked to Bonnie and a look at her grandmother, the girl Knew better than to disobey. She took a seat at the corner of the room. "You too mister. Leila and I aren't done. If you don't mind take a seat near Bonnie" to Damon Sheila tone sounded nothing like a suggestion. It was a smooth to issue an order. He joined Bonnie and both looked at each other. It felt like they were undisciplined children. They sat on their lonely corner barely daring to engage each other.

"So you will give your homework to Bonbon. Or can I come visit you again?" Leila quickly asked. She looked at Sheila hopeful. Her eyes were bright and she was already planning her next visit. The Lady raised her eyes to face both of her parents for approval. Bonnie deflected to Damon, whom was somewhat scared of the Bennett matriarch. He quickly nodded and Sheila agreed to Leila. The conversation continued between Leila and Sheila until the little girl became sleepy.

No one between Damon and Bonnie dared removed her from Sheila's arms. She nested on Sheila's side and it was a cozy set up. It was silent for a while until Sheila moved her eyes from the little frame. She looked at Damon very carefully and then to Bonnie. In the moment, the pressure they both felt made them hold hands. It was a very shy display of affection but comforting for the both of them.

Sheila's eyes stared at their hands; it caught Bonnie's attention and she was quick to remove her fingers. However, Damon clung to her pinky and pulled her hand back, he stopped the light touches, and finally he interlaced their fingers. The warmth and the tingle would have been comforting any other day but right now, nothing could really comfort Bonnie. The young woman was shaking from apprehension. Damon started drawing pattern on the back of her hand, he did not know what was going on but he was willing to offer his support, also it seemed they were in this mess together.

Therefore, they chose to present a united front, which Sheila appreciated. If this two had a child in common she would not want anything else that a united front. She cleared her throat, the way they were staring at each other, the smoothing touch, and the silent messages were not the reason she made them sit.

* * *

"So which one of you, would go first? Which one of you would explain this?" Sheila calmly asked. She let her eyes run between them. She adjusted Leila on the bed and went back to staring at them. Bonnie swallowed thick and hard, a hospital was not the place she saw herself doing this. Her hand started to sweat, _it was time he gave her hand back, it doesn't matter how comfortable it was._

"Grams he has nothing to do with this. I can explain on my own." Bonnie tried to set the record straight and Damon gave her an accusatory look. He promised to himself that it would be present for her _so why don't start now._ His free hand recovered the hand he was already holding. It was his silent message. She let her eyes linger on him; she offered a calm smile. They stayed staring at each other until grams cleared her throat again.

"Well back in my day you needed to be two to have a kid. I doubt time have changed that much, so he has at least 50 percent to do with this." With the way they look at each other, she could only assumed that how that little bundle of love came to be. To the sentence, Damon could barely retain a chuckle. Bonnie free hand moved to slap lightly his side, so he could stop. _He would get them in trouble; they were already in trouble._ He silently apologized and kissed the center of her palm. _Trouble literally more trouble. He said he would be stupid once but he was doing it again._ However, it did made her feel a bit relaxed. She could say something

"I got paid grams; I got paid to have her." She said, she barely confessed it. It was a murmur but Sheila got it loud and clear. "Damon can you take Leila out "she looked at him, she sounded as she was pleading for her dear life. He gave her a concern look. He was not sure she was in a state to talk about this and for his quick understanding, it seemed her surrogacy was a secret to her family. She unclasped her finger from his, he maintained the contact as long as he could and regretfully let go. "Just… don't worry you will be my hero another time."

"I will be waiting outside, so just you know because Leila won't let us leave without you." with a politely smile Damon pulled Leila away from Sheila. The woman was excessively shocked; she could formulate a polite reply. Just pulling out of her bafflement the time to see her great grandchild go; she quickly gave a kiss to the sleeping sweet angel. She focused her attention on Bonnie. Words waiting on her tongue to be freed. It was worse than any scenario she had concocted in her mind to explain this incongruous situation.

* * *

"Bonnie Sheila Bennett, what on lord could be the reason you will do this? Why will you act like that? What would make you sell a child? Baby … baby why?" at the second Damon closed the door; the words were out. The tone of her voice carried all type of worries. She had never sounded so uncertain. She did not know how to react. She could not even look at her in the eyes. She passed her hand in her hair. Where do we go from here?

"Remember the Italian trip, the one you told me not to go? Well you were right. We got in trouble, life-endangering trouble and we did know what to do. I did not know better so I went at head. I had no way to come home; we had people coming after us. You were right all along." She sat up straight; her hands went to the side of her chair. She swallowed some of her words. She looked at her grams and it was not disappointment. She was prepared to face disappointment but not despair, not incomprehension and a bunch of confused feeling.

"Why I am just hearing about this right now. You my baby girl away in the world and you can't call home when you are in trouble. Why I am just hearing about this just after I met you walking double? Would you have told me one day if that lil baby never found me?" Sheila did not know how to react. Words had lost their meaning.

"I would not have told you because it would have changed everything. It would have made you look at me the way that you are doing right now. It would have made you judge me. It would have destroyed you. I did not know how to tell you that your good granddaughter was not who you thought she was. I didn't know when to tell you than I Bonnie Bennett sold my child. What was I supposed to tell you." she clasped the side of her chair until her hand hurt. She fought to keep her tears in check but she was already losing the battle. A look at Sheila destroyed expression, her reddening eyes. She could not, not her grams tears, anger was better; I would take anger every day, hour, minute, second.

"You really think that I would have judge you that I would have thought about anything but your safety." Her voice broke; she quickly removed the single tears falling. Not now, not at any moment in front of a child will she cry. Sheila was old school. Crying in front a child meant worrying the poor soul. This frightened, shattered child needed better. She needed to understand where it came from.

"Baby I would have been angry definitely, not because you made a mistake but because you did not seek my help when you needed it. Right now, I am angry because you lied to me. You never lied to me once; I raised you better morale than that. I would have not judge you. This little angel is around five I guess. Which meant you were a child when you gave birth to her. I would have put some sense in you but never judged you." she looked demolished by the idea. What put such thought in her mind?

"I was judging myself, so why wouldn't you. I hated myself so why wouldn't you. I did not want to be me after that, so why would you not hate me? I did not need to see what I saw every day in the mirror reflecting in your eyes. You were the only person that still loved me because even I, I was incapable of It." she cleared her hair away from her face; she raised her head and then quickly let it down again. She could not stand the damage she was making.

"Why don't come here, crying over there won't change so much "making space on her hospital bed for Bonnie, Sheila moved to the side. She waited for her grandchild to come closer. Somehow, all her anger had find a way to evaporate. What she heard forced her to focus on the truth, the pain bonnie hid with her secret. How could she possibly want to add much on already a guilty conscious? Blame meant nothing right now; she was already broken. Her baby girl was in piece.

* * *

Bonnie's fingers stopped clasping on the chair. Her blood found its way back in her white knuckles. Her old tears had dried to be replaced by fresh ones. She slowly walked to the bed and sat on the side, she was barely sitting on it. Sheila tapped on the mattress and finally her granddaughter laid next to her, replacing Leila in the now cold spot. The lady lifted the blanket to cover both of them as she used to do when Bonnie was just a toddler and she was still scared of her own shadow. She wrapped her arm around Bonnie and pulled her in a bear hug.

She wiped the tears away. They were nothing pretty in looking her little baby crying, she moved the curls away from her face, revealing the shameful expression that Bonnie was hiding. Sheila stared longer than she ever did to this poor tormented and complex child.

After a long moment of a meaningful silence, Bonnie's sobs had ceased, apart from single tearing that came randomly. She was in a state where she could listen. Therefore, Sheila regained her voice. "Do you remember what I always use to tell you when you were just a lil baby?"

"It is not the mistake that matter, it is how you do right by it, and it is better not to make a fool of yourself trying to hide it." Bonnie started whispering but Sheila gave her a smooth tap on the back and her voice became louder during the last second. This was different from stealing a candy. This was not the time of mistake easily corrected.

"What did you do after that unfortunate mistake?" Sheila pursued her methodical questioning. It seemed she would never finish giving life lessons to this little woman. She was in one way feeling bad. She was feeling bad because at some point, she fell for the pretense Bonnie always knew how to maintain. She came back from Italy and started acting older than she was. She started carrying a heavy maturity around. Sheila did not step in to protect her childhood. After the adolescent crisis, the maturity came as a blessing.

"I made a fool of myself trying to protect my ego, trying to swipe everything under the rug." Bonnie answered; there were no point hiding how she felt now. She lifted her chin and took a good look at her grandmother. The woman looked unsatisfied with the answer but her eyes only showed affection not disappointment.

"You did worse than that and you know it. You hurt yourself for no good reason just because you were afraid to hurt my feelings. You were afraid to hurt me, a grown ass woman and that is what upset me." Sheila was still trying not to shed a tear. The woman was old school; she often expressed her emotion with act and fact. Right now, she felt it was not the time to make it about her. She had seven years to compensate in hours. The way she saw it, her granddaughter was still not done with that pain and if that little baby would start carrying for her own baby she needed to let go of some luggage.

* * *

"Now you're going to be someone mama, because we are going to make sure of that. You will then understand that it is not a child role to protect adult from hurt. Kids make mistakes; that is just what they do, and you were a child under bad influence. I won't lie I would have been mad seven years ago but I would have appreciated that you told me. I would have appreciate that you let me be there, so I would have protected you." Her voice was unwavering even though emotion assaulted her.

"I am not mad that you have a child because it was seven years ago, I am not judging what you did. I am judging my failure, I feel like I've let you down. I leaned on you too much; I forgot you were a kid." The Bennett matriarch softly said. Warmth and love filled her eyes. She looked at Bonnie whom was still avoiding her look. She knew what her little baby was thinking. She was not over the lie but she did not want it to be all she focused on. There were too much involved.

"Oh I am angry, don't get me wrong. However, it is not the right time and it won't change anything right now. Right now, you need to make things right by that little girl and by yourself. I am going to help you do both. Even if your thick head doesn't know how to ask for help when you need it. That is the only way we are getting out of the mess you you understand?" She ended with her tone containing maternal severity. Bonnie simply nodded but for Sheila it was not enough. She wanted words to attach her to her future action.

"Yes ma'am, I understand and I apologize again. I know I have to do right by Leila." The young Bennett answered. She did not know how to feel. She did not know if she was grateful that her grandmother let it slide or if she wanted more of a hardship.

"And yourself, and yourself I will not take any less of it." Sheila insisted, she was not new to Bonnie little trick. She needed to hold her to her words.

"I will do right by Leila and myself." Bonnie repeated

"Good baby, very good. Now I need you to tell me all of it. I need you to free yourself of some of the weight. Tell me all of those words I was supposed to hear seven years ago." Sheila pushed and decided to exploit the momentum.

* * *

"It never felt the same. Pain never felt the same. I thought the worst was the day I let him take her. Because that day I was just weak, I..." she stopped to take a breath, with her grams there were no lies. She talked about things with her psychologist but she kept her sense of shame.

"I knew it will get bad if I let her go but also I knew that it was right. There was no possibility of keeping her with him in my life. He would have made it worse. I was a child and I didn't want to lose that too. Leila meant growing up. Letting go of bad habit and stopping the bad influences. At the time, I was not ready to do it, so he convinced me to let her go. Then I was not ready to deal with the absence, mostly because I was alone." She wiped her tears and stopped talking again. She did not know where to go after this admission. Seven years she knew and never said this.

"It's all going to be all right, no one is judging how a stressed teenager felt. Keep talking and let all of it out so we can fix our wrong. Gram is listening." The wise woman added calmly. Her voice felt like a balm on Bonnie's wounds.

"Then I came back and it was not fine, giving her up was not the worst. Dealing with the aftermath was the worst. I came home and I came back different. He did not notice, so he continued being himself but I started hating him. I started thinking that he forced me to do it. I wanted to leave him but I felt like I needed to be punished, so we did not broke up." She was putting her hard past outside. It felt good talking about it. She reopened scarified wounds.

"Baby, why you did not tell me? I know I said that it did not matter but it did because that was what you put yourself through." Listening was harder than Sheila thought. With each words, she wondered how she missed that amount of sadness.

"I didn't tell you because I would come home and you would treat me right, so right that I will forget for a second that across the sea I left my baby. I will forget that I wanted to punish myself because guilt did not let me move on. So I became silent. I will come around feign happiness and you will not call me out on it. If I could fool you then I will be able to fool myself right. You know me better than I know myself." Bonnie continued, finding her courage to tell her own experience.

"I am sorry, I let you down. Listen, I did not only let you down before but also later. I saw you getting weird this past day and I said nothing. We're all in the wrong on that one." Sheila admitted.

"So I would balance between fake happiness and real sadness. Then before I noticed I became depress and never left the bed. He got tired and told me I could get another child. I lost it and kicked him out. He had no right to talk about her. I became each day more lost. Suddenly I was on my own. I became angry with myself, with Leila for simply being born in the wrong situation. I had a box with small stuff that they gave me at the hospital and one day, I almost burned it. I ended up crying the entire night. The next day I was in your house cracking jokes." Depression was not a subject, she was willing to reminisce, but it was part of how she felt.

* * *

"It went for months until I broke down. I could not function. I would cry every single day. Still I said nothing; I asked my dad for some money and started seeing a psychiatrist when the pain became unbearable. It did not fix many things but it dull the pain. It was better than what the previous situation was; at least I could eat, go to classes. I was able to function day by day. I move to Los Angeles. It felt like I had left it behind. Then you called and I came back and still you did not notice something was wrong. I was so unhappy, I was angry but I was considering it a karmic gift. My grams was sick, I was losing my dream. Karma right." She sighed. She was exhausted. Talking was draining her. It made all of it real.

"Sweetie, you paid way more than you needed to do because you did nothing that deserved all of this." grams reassured her.

"Then Damon knocked at our door, wrong timing. I lost it, felt like I was regressing. It was too much at once you, Leila. I felt like I needed to choose my battles. I told him to back off but I am glad he didn't take no for an answer. I am glad I am getting to know her. Still it does not feel right sometimes, I think this is my fault, my baby girl, this little sunshine. She is sick, really sick..." she restarted crying. Leila was just something she did not know how to approach the matter clearheaded.

"Whatever it is, listen to me clearly whatever it is she will be okay. She is an angel." Sheila felt a pang at her heart.

"You don't know that, you don't know how bad it is. My little baby ...my little baby she has..."she could not finish, all the nights she spent by Leila's side. She pursued

"She bleeds; she stays in bed for days, days. Damon and Me, even if he does not show it, we are worried sick. Not for her body only also for what it does to her mind. She should be outside with other kids. We should be dancing together. we make up stories, so she does not lose her happiness. Angel, princess, fairy everything that can help all of us to find some escape. We go in her room, we make up a story, but we have stopped believing in angel. I come home tired and I want to share, I want to tell you but I can't. I go over there every day in the morning because I don't know if she has survived the night." She stopped; her lungs were burning. Crying had stopped her breathing and her head was hurting.

"I don't feel good, I have been for seven years, but right now it takes the cake. I don't even know where to start. I don't know how long until they snatched my baby. Because he will go back where he is from once she is fine. I know that now I just want her forever. I want to be with her forever because even through this is a painful situation, I am genuinely happy that I get to be with her. I rather feel good sometime. If it make sense. I know I can make things right By Leila, I really don't know if I can do the same for myself. I am not even trying. I am afraid that if I focus on myself, I won't have enough time to give to her and God forbid I don't give her everything she deserves. If it happens that tomorrow..." this was where she drew the line. This was where there was a rupture between words and feeling.

"The only way you can do right by her is by giving her the best version of you. Listen I don't know where you get all those wrong ideas. Gives her the mother she deserves, the woman you wish she grew up to be. Nothing less. I will do something for you, I am going to help you, and you are going to lean on me. You will come home and tell me how bad you feel. The night when you are too scared for her health, I will tell you story about faith, angel like the one you tell her. Obviously I am going to talk to that boyfriend of yours" Bonnie rolled her eyes when Sheila implied that Damon was her boyfriend. However the matriarch continued.

"Don't give me that look. I don't look this old to be taken for a fool by kids. I will talk to your little boyfriend and let him know that after all of this, he needs to leave a place for you or you are going to do it yourself. Leila, she is a Bennett, she will have her mama, and grams love from now on. I just need you to focus on getting better for yourself and Leila. Oh right now dry those tears and don't let the boy wait too long .we are done here. Give me a kiss and let me sleep that daughter of yours exhausted me" Bonnie kissed her grams and opened the door on a waiting Damon. He opened his hand and she walked into the embrace.

* * *

 **Sheila and her wit.** _ **She is angry but in their situation, it does not weight more than what is happening and what already happened. Kisses until the next chapter. Review, follow and fav**_


	13. Chapter 13

_**Thanks to everyone who take the time to review, follow and fav. You are the inspiration behind the different chapter and you forced them out of the muse. Now I hope this chapter will entertain you my lovelies. Please follow, fav and review.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything.**_

 _ **Ps: casamento by c4 pedro will make everything better after this sign xxxxxxxxxx,**_ so if you can find the song.

* * *

He knew this was coming; for almost two weeks, he successfully avoided her. However, it was easy before she was in a hospital bed. Right now, he was standing in her living room with his arms crossed over his chest. He still was not use to the way with which she could have an entire conversation with her eyes. Sheila looked at the petrified young man in her living room and she smiled. _At least he knew to fear his elder except when it came to having his hands all over your granddaughter._

Her smile faded and she took a seat. She looked up and down at the young man standing in front of her "why don't you take a seat young man?" it did not sound like a suggestion because it was an order. Damon took a seat reluctantly; it was as clear as the sun that he would prefer to be somewhere else. He looked at the door hopeful, he just needed Bonnie to cross that door, and he will be on his merry way. _Bonnie, she could have gave me a head up._ He sighed and sunk lower in the sofa.

Sheila pushed a glass of sweet ice tea toward him. _He will need the comfort._ She smiled as an indication that he needed to relax. She personally had a little soft spot for the young man. She was not blind to everything he did to help with her granddaughter, he was definitely better than the previous one and he had made a great job raising that little angel as a single parent. Therefore, he was starting with some extra points.

Damon gladly drunk the cool beverage, he hoped it could cool the heat in him. There was no way around this; he was somehow scared. The old Lady had just this effect on him, she commanded respect, which he was willing to offer but she just had that extra authoritative touch. That was what scared Damon so much, he always had troubles with authority.

"So is it the moment where you ask me about my intention toward your granddaughter?" after avidly drinking the ice tea, he finally found his wit back. The silence had created a heavy discomfort mostly when his gulps could be heard. He put his glass on the table and crossed his legs at the level of his knee, he was trying to act as the confident man that he was.

"Oh you got jokes in you." Sheila teased and Damon smile faltered. He sat straight and decided to speak only when he was spoken to. "Now that being said, do we need to have a conversation about your intention? Do you even know them?" Sheila looked straight into his frozen blue eyes. She was not planning to ease his way through this conversation. The affection she felt for him did not matter.

"Well we are friends… so as a friend I only have her best interest at heart." Sheila smiled through each words. _Those kids really think I was born yesterday._ Was she supposed to keep a serious expression if they were acting as if she had naïve written all over her face? She crossed her arm and inquisitively looked at him as he sipped one more time on his ice tea.

"I guess that the dumb version you both choose to believe. That is none of my business for the moment. If you are not fooling around, I have nothing to be worried about right. One of those curly head running around is a reasonable number right now." before she even finished her sentence, Damon turned red. He choked on his tea or on his saliva. He could not tell but he was sure he understood what she meant. _Did that woman just subtly brush the topic of procreation between her granddaughter and me?_ He coughed it out and with the most seriousness he could master, he pursued the conversation.

"I can assure you we are not fooling around ma'am, it is quite the opposite." He spoke quickly. He did not expect to have such conversation with anyone in mid of a hot southern afternoon. He looked at the clock and Bonnie was supposed to be out of her shift. It was part of their new arrangement to accommodate her schedule; Damon let Leila spend some afternoon in Bonnie's place. She could help her grandmother and spend more time with Leila. However, right now it looked like the young woman let him fall into a trap.

* * *

"Okay but your little love story is not the reason why I needed to see you Damon. Recently some events were brought to my attention. I assume that you have an idea of what I am referring to." She cautiously asked; she did not want to put Bonnie's personal business out there. If her granddaughter did not share her dark days with this man, she would not do it.

"If it is about how she came to surrogacy, she did tell me and I assumed she shared detail about her depression too. If it is what you want to talk about then I don't know if we should do it in her absence. I don't want to cross any lines. She just started opening herself to Leila and me, I don't want to endanger that, nor do I want to disrespect her." His voice took a sudden solemnity. At the instant, He seemed to have lost all fear of the matriarch. He always found the desire to protect and respect Bonnie. Even if the person to whom he was talking happened to be someone who cared about her too.

Sheila smiled; _her granddaughter taste in man had literally improved._ She was happy to hear the protective tone in his voice. The change in his composure was palpable. She poured him more ice tea _. He did deserve it_ ; he was making her work easier. "Obviously I don't go around spilling my Bonnie's tea like that. I wanted to talk to you because that little woman is precious and fragile. She will give your daughter everything and she will probably extend the generosity to you. Which is not bad, y'all are good people but I just want to be assure you'll treat her as she deserves to be treated."

She looked at him to make sure he was following her, and then she pursued. "I am her grams; I have to make sure that you are not just using her. I know that Leila won't use her that is her blood but I have my doubt on you. What will happen when the little angel is healthy? Would you walk out of Bonnie's life? Will it be thank you and bye? You look surprise; I guess Bonnie kept that fear secret. You see why she needs to be protected."

"No, she did not tell me that she was worried that she would be pushed out of Leila's life. I will not lie, it was the original plan, but things have literally changed. I am not surprised that she thinks that. I did not approach her with the intention to rekindle a mother and daughter relationship but I assure you things have completely changed." He sat straighter and did not avoid her eyes. He wanted Sheila to read the truth in his pupils and hear it in his tone.

"What changed the fact that you have feeling for her? That is no guarantee; love changes at any time. I assumed that is the only thing, which changed in the few months that you spent together. People whom pretended loving her, even those who loved her let her down or betrayed her. I did too. Words are just words." She countered but his smile let her know that it was more. He had the answer to that on the tip of his tongue. This had nothing to do with him.

"The same way you need to make Bonnie happy, the need that you have to protect her. I feel the same for my daughter. Leila has someone who is supposed to be her mother but she has never received what she needed from that woman. Then your granddaughter entered the picture and she stepped to the role, she was reluctant to do so. She was scared but she did the most maternal thing I have ever seen, she forgot about her personal interest." His voice was full of pride and praise.

He felt the need to stop because he started to take in consideration everything that petite woman did in their life in matter of months. "She told me once she needed to be all about herself because Leila birth killed the child in her. I was so mad that I told her words that wounded her soul but I don't regret telling her those things because it broke the wall quickly. However, it did not stop her. She was not willing to help until she saw Leila. Things those two bring in each other. That is love, purest form of love. I would be a monster to step all over that. Bonnie revived the child in Leila."

He did not know why he was almost tearing up in this woman living room. Maybe he was just putting words on what have been going on in his life. He cleared his throat, trying to remove the lump and to get rid of the emotion. "Now that she has a mom, she is a freer child. I know she does not know that Bonnie is her mother but she instinctively feels it. She is more incline to behave as a kid. Bonnie, she is just amazing. Now I am might be able of the worse when pushed, but it would take a lot to make me hurt her. I have thought about it, if keeping Bonnie happy keeps Leila happy then I am dedicated to Bonnie's happiness. It is thank you and can we keep you forever."

* * *

He squashed all her next question; this was much more than she needed to hear. _He should have save some for Bonnie; god knows she needs to hear her praise. "You_ are definitely climbing on my spot for favorite boyfriend but you better keep that mindset forever because if somehow you find a way to make matter worse and hurt her. Kid you don't want to find out." She smiled and this time it did not carry any other meaning that genuine kindness.

"Miss Sheila, we are not dating. We are just friend," Damon quickly corrected and he finished his glass of ice tea _. It was not so bad after all._ He breathed a relief and was quite satisfied that someone forced him to put words on how he felt about all the change Bonnie brought in his life.

"Then you should because you are both looking dumb acting like you are about to tie the knot. I won't judge your reason to play this silly game of we are friend but I can't take my eyes away from you. Facts are you two can't stay friends not with the way your eyes and hands behave and I won't out her but she is not pushing you away. So maybe clear the air out before you both suffocate."

Damon had no time to answer Bonnie was stepping in the room and like magnet he was already on her path. His arm circled her and Sheila snorted _friend the only fools in this room were the one claiming that lie as a truth._

"Darling here you are, your _**friend**_ and I just had that needed talk, and he did well." Sheila said as she left the room. Those two had a way of making her feel uncomfortable. _They did not know how to behave in presence of their elder._ Bonnie's cheeks grew red and she pretended that she did not know what her grams was talking about. _Why did she always had to embarrass her_? As _if being all sweaty right now was not enough. Bonnie he saw you with puke on your shirt. Quit it._

She put her dancing kit on the floor. She looked at Damon and he looked like the amount of damage inflicted by her grandmother was reasonable. She looked around, her eyes trying to find her daughter.

"She is in the kitchen eating cookies and probably getting sugar overdose on your grandmother ice tea." He could still taste the sugar on his tongue several minutes later. She rolled her eyes and pushed him out of her way. She wanted to shower but she also needed to meet her little princess.

"Was it bad? You don't look too bad. I thought I will find you in tears." Bonnie said as she undid her chignon. She tilted her head so she could get a glimpse of Damon. _He grabbed her by the waist. Was he conscious that I am a ball of sweat?_ She tried to push him away; she was still trying to get use to his familiarity mostly after their kiss, which seemed to have more effect on her.

"I knew it, you trapped me bonbon. You being late should have been a sign. You are like a German clock but don't worry Sheila and me are cool. She is my best friend now." He said teasing her and he finally released her. He stopped and took a breath. _This was hard_ , _why was she_ _walking around in a bodysuit?_

"We need to tell her or I can do it on my own if you prefer" he changed the conversation on more sensible matters. Damon wanted to explain to Leila the next process that was her operation. They needed to schedule the time and set up the preoperative management for Bonnie and her. However, after Rose refusal to discuss her sickness with Leila, he was not sure Bonnie was willing to do it. When it came to thing as explaining what would happen good or bad, he was not willing to impose the pressure.

"We will do it _**together**_." She emphasized the together and looked at him as if it was so obvious. He shared a silent apology. "Are we doing it tonight? I don't want to stress her; she is supposed to have a fun night with grams." Bonnie looked at him expecting an answer.

"The only thing we are doing tonight is taking a break for parenting activities. We need a night out." he raised a finger to stop her protestation "you owe me after this ambush and you definitely need to relax or your grams will come after me again." She sighed and he knew that he won. He was out of the house before he did anything stupid. _She was looking way too attractive_.

* * *

"You are being overly dramatic Bonnie" Damon sighed, of course she was falling for that little masquerade that Leila put on. The puppy eyes, the little begging. She had used all her ammunition at once. The little princess just used all the tricks of the book and Bonnie was still recovering. It was hard for her to leave her behind while Damon promised a night of full fun.

"I'm not; we should have taken her with us. What will we do if something happens once we leave her alone? She looked so tired and she wasn't happy." Bonnie countered. She was still holding the door of her house and she could hear Leila talking to her grams. Truthfully, there were laughs and it seemed the little girl had already forgotten about them. However, the fast beat of her heart left no place for reasoning, she was extremely anxious. It took her an entire minute to cross that door.

"Does she sound tired to you? That is manipulation. She is going for the weak link, you. She knew you'd give up. And you did" Damon threw his hands in the air. He gave her a stern look, he understood her feeling, but he would not let her do this. _This was a night they needed_. He wanted to give her a break. She deserved it and after the heavy conversation he just had, _I deserve a break too_.

"Giving up, I did none of that, if I had given up she will be right here next to me. Have you seen her with those big eyes and her curls? She was begging in silence. Like I am feeling so bad, she could have a fever or anything like that." Damon just rolled his eyes if it was upon her or Leila; they will be attach to each other with an umbilical cord. He wanted to get her to relax and to be prepared for what was to come.

"You did give up; she made you promise that you will be there before she falls asleep. That's before ten. Bonbon 10 pm, your child just gave you a curfew." He laughed and she slapped on his arm. She pouted and then frowned. _What was she supposed to do, he wanted to act tough but he was second away to give up too. He wanted to play it tough but he melted when they both looked at him like he hung the moon._

"Damianio don't act like you were not about to quit before we crossed this door. Just another minute, if grams had not pushed us out. You would be reading bedtime story by now." She countered; she was tired of his bullying when he almost fell for the machination too. He raised his eyebrows and she smiled.

"You like it? Finally found one for you and it suits you so much." She smiled proudly and her hands flew to his cheeks, she tapped on them and released his face. She found a nickname for him after he rejected all the previous ones and if he did not want this one too, _she still would stick by it_. He cocked his head to say something but she glared at him and he knew better. _Was it a thing running in the family?_ She picked it from Sheila obviously the glare of the old lady still terrorized him and now Leila was picking it from her, she was quite good at it too.

"I was not battling the same evil, should I remind you that you were also pouting like a kid in there and giving all kind of look from puppy to less innocent one, if I was weakening it was not for bedtime story. Bed and something else maybe" she stopped on her track and he continued walking. She was getting a bit uncomfortable with his allusions. She was still not over their kiss, she thought that she could sweep it under the rug but he decided to let her not do it. She could not tell if it was innocent or he was heavily pushing for more.

"But here we stand, now get that heavy bottom of yours in this car." He slowly moves his eyes on her ass to emphasize his words. _She was mistaking if she assumed that after he made eye contact with her dressed as she was, he would keep that kiss as an isolated event_. He was quite willing to act as nothing happened after he kissed her. However, he did not consider the aftermath, it was worse than ever to be so close to her. She just emanated that sensuality, now he could not stop thinking about her lips _not that I did not do it before._

* * *

"Is it that big?" She twisted in every direction trying to get the right profile. He looked at her butt and wondered if it was a trick question. _It is a trick question; she is playing with your mind. Don't answer_. He did not answer but he stared a lot, he stared as he did everyday with every inch of her skin. She caught Damon staring and he shamelessly licked his lips after he slowly made eye contact with her.

"Damon? Really? With your daughter just in the next room?" She sassed trying to mask her growing desire too; _he was looking extra great today._ It seemed he has pulled out all his panoply of Casanova with that dashing dark navy blue suit. He only smirked and gave her a suave look. _What was he doing? Okay just need to survive what three hour, hmm definitely Leila should have tagged along_. He helped her enter the car.

"Well, I did not asked you to look like a candy and I doubt Leila understand what me staring at your back means or we will have something new to explain." He took his seat behind the wheel and winked at her. Her cheeks turned crimson. Was he tired of the subtle hint? Those hint… just thinking about them made her shiver. He had this manner to wrap his hand around her waist recently that just screamed claim. He would disguise it in something very innocent but she knew better. She also was getting lost into his game. If he stood next to her, her hands always found a way to be in contact with his skin. _You are doing it again_. She quickly removed her hand from his crow colored hair.

Clearly, he was taking some liberty tonight. She fanned herself with her hand. He grabbed her hand as it was retracting. He was playing with her finger when she was speaking to him. It was his personal favorite. His cobalt eyes would lock her green one, into a very sensual, meaningful staring dance and his hand would find a way to caress her skin, play with her hair. He found it funny to distract her. _Don't let him get to you. He is fighting dirty._

"I just feel so bad for leaving her. It won't take an hour to get her ready. Damon" her green eyes appeared greener. Her little warm fingers circled his own. She knew what button to push, with weeks she noticed how it was easy to make him comply with her wish. She did not use it a lot but in extreme situation like this one, she could. She let her finger rest on his hand. _She was not falling for this. Nope, she was not going alone anywhere with him looking like walking sex_. _She needed the ultimate cock blocker, Leila_. Leila was ultimately her saving grace; the little girl had a Spidey sense when it comes to her parent. She appeared before thing took a turn for the worse _not really the worse but a road straight to complicate._

* * *

"Bonnie what's the real problem here? She will be fine with Sheila. You just need to relax." The Italian man tried to rationalize. He interlaced his fingers with hers and kissed their joined hands. He felt her a little bit relax. He knew her so well that it was scary that they had reached that level of intimacy in matters of months. She sighed he was not falling for it and she looked at the house erected in front of her. She knew Sheila was perfectly able to take care of Leila but it was extremely hard to let go of her daughter.

"She won't break just because you are not looking at her. You will find her just alright when you come back rested and relaxed." He continued and kissed her temple. He always did it when he wanted her to let go of her worries. It was a thing Leila did too. It seemed everyone in the Salvatore house thought kisses could cure everything.

"I know but I just want to maximize my time with her until..." she let her sentence linger and just shut down. She did not want to sound greedy. She was grateful that Damon already gave her the chance to get closer to her. How would it sound to complain when later he rightfully takes her away? He kissed her hand again, knowing well where her thoughts were leading. Sheila had given him a clear map on the different doubts and fears that she was battling. The conversation with Sheila was the deciding factor that led him to believe they needed a night as just Bonnie and Damon. The other reasons were simply selfish. They really needed to talk, two adult not confronting their feelings were the recipe for disaster.

"Bonbon, you need to breathe and take it slow. It is all great to take the trophy of mommy of the year, like you are great as a mother even if you are not there every second." He meant everything he said. Once she had stop fighting her instinct at every corner, she had eased into her role. She was definitively more than the friend that she was supposed to be. He could see her hesitation some time but in the overall, she was comfortable.

"However you need time to relax, take care of yourself. That's what we are going to do. Leila will be here as long as you need her to be." He emphasized the last sentence. He knew that was what she wanted to hear. He knew she needed to feel as if the choice belonged to her. He was not planning to have a clean break once Leila was healthy. It was not possible, he could not hurt Bonnie or Leila, they were just so in love with each other.

"Okay we can go but I need a minute." She got down of the car and ran with her heels, which terrified Damon she could have broken a bone. She opened the door, living it wide open. Damon lazily followed her. He found her hugging Leila; she was squeezing the oxygen out of her. She kissed the crown of her head. It took her a minute to be done. _They just had few hours before the curfew, woman._

She released the little girl very slowly, "I forgot to hug you when I was leaving. You're going to be good with grams." She said after the little girl offered a surprised expression. Sheila just looked unfazed. This felt more like the first night of a newly mother out. The anxiety and the paranoia, she might have to push her granddaughter out, _acting like her grown ass hadn't been a child I took care of._

"But you did, and then you promise that you will back before I go to bed. You promise right?" Leila did not let her excuse slide and she asked with a very inquisitive eyes. She was suspicious. Both her parents looked overdress. _They were going to a ball without her_. She felt so betrayed. Bonnie had her hair tied in a very high bun. She was wearing make-up, a very bright red lipstick that the little girl found extremely beautiful. Her dress was royal. Leila kissed Bonnie's temple before the young woman straighten. The little girl could feel that her friend was worried.

"When you will comeback, grams and I would have made cookies. Do you want me to make something special?" she asked excited, she already had plenty idea of shape and form. "Grams says you can make anything." the last bit sounded a bit skeptical.

"Are you doubting me little angel, have you done some cookie before?" Sheila rolled her eyes in all playfulness while Leila was still waiting for Bonnie's answer, which she never got because Damon was already ushering Bonnie out of the house.

"You see, she will be just fine."

* * *

Crossing grapevines rows with high heels was not something Bonnie wished she could do constantly. She sighed _why on earth would he go for this_? When he threateningly took her away from her princess and coerced her to dress up, she had hoped for something less rustic. She had thought about a classic four or five stars restaurant not a walk in grapevines. She could barely follow him; her dress was too tight.

Why make the effort if it was to hang out in grapevines? She knew why she made the effort. Well if she stopped pretending, she would admit that she picked one of her most revealing dress because she considered tonight a date night. The dress was not extremely revealing but it had an opening on the back that dipped extremely low and it perfectly hugged her curve. It kept her in the classy side with its knee length and it cream color. The front in the other side was extremely strict with the long sleeves. Therefore, it was not surprising the fascination Damon found with her back.

"I quit, the pain is not worth it." She threw her hand in the air and Damon laughed. She had refused his assistance multiple times but she was right to do so. It seemed helping her had turned in another way to invade her personal space.

"here you go princess bonbon" he said as he easily lifted her from the ground. A oops escape her mouth before her arms surrounded his neck as she searched for stability in his arms.

"This is ridiculous, Damianio. You are being a bit too much. A helping hand will have been enough." She tried to cover her blush with complaints. However, she was pleased to have his arms circling her the way they did. The proximity of their bodies, heat traveled through every pore of her skin. She grasped on his flexing muscle whilst her eyes mused on his profile under the dim lighting of the moon. She felt the need to nest her head on his chest, so she followed her instinct. She let the smell of his fragrance intoxicated her.

He smelled like what she imagined masculinity did. A strong mixed a musk, something earthly, a touch of sophistication, and his personal scent. She raised with the help of her arm on his shoulder to secure a better position and their chest grazed. It was enough to send her heart in wild gallop. The way he carried her bridal style did attract the attention now that they walked out of the grapevines field.

He took his sweet time as he released her. When his touch finally dissipated from her skin after a lingering finger left a burning trail on the soft skin of her back, she breathed.

"Thank you." Her voice sounded frail to herself. She was still recovering from the thoughts that came with the contact. She let her hands linger on the collar of his suit. She rearranged what was already in order and straightened an already well-tied tie. There was no need to say that she wanted to keep her hands away from his skin but she was not willing to terminate the contact between them entirely.

That was what they had been doing this past two weeks after their kiss. Having contact without really being in contact. Leila was a great buffer, when she was there it was easy to function, it was easy to forget about the tension. However, once she was removed of the equation, the attraction between them was excessively potent. Their touches were hesitant or extremely charged with meaning.

* * *

 _ **Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**_

It took time for them to break fully apart but they eventually did. The atmosphere of the place would prove itself a challenge. When finally Bonnie succeeded to unclasped her eyes from the charming appearance of Damon. Her eyes focused on the rustic set up.

It was a small vineyard; the architecture was reminiscent of provincial Spain. The red and orangeade of the bricks contrasted with the vibrant green of the ivy covering them. The roof was made of old tile. Black tulips paved the path toward the main entrance. She doubted the flower naturally grew in this region. However, they added a poetic charm to the place.

There was a beautiful garden surrounding the modest Spanish villa. The color themselves were maintained in the very darken vivid side. It was a beautiful contradiction. The bushes were vividly green and illuminated by dim orange lights that casted colorful shadow on the brick road that parted the different sections of the garden. There were exotic flowers all over the house. From opium poppies to black roses, it was so uncontrolled. Vanilla orchid found the way to float higher than the other plants.

"It is beautiful," she whispered as if her voice would have altered the peace of her surroundings. Damon's hand rested on her back and she leaned in his touch. He helped her way to the vineyard.

The interior found the impossible way to be more fairy than the exterior. It seemed the plants had found their way inside. The seats were sculpted in granite and the softest silk pillows than Bonnie had ever seen covered them. The lights were arranged in the way that imitated the illumination of a Prairie by fireflies. The room was warm and jazz was played in the background.

 _She wasn't making it out alive_. The Smirk he gave her just confirmed her doubt. She was already rambling her mind away while he was listening with a contempt smile. He decided to let her marinate in her emotion. He sat across her and appreciated her beauty under these flattering lights. She needed no enhancer for her beauty; it was just fortuitous that this light let the details come to lights.

The green of her eyes broken as a prism of color. He was taking notice of the underlying tone of gold melting in the dominant forest green. She runs her eyes fast around and she was alter in her motion by his hand gripping on her to calm her. She took a deep breath.

"Is it another of your mother daughter thing? The rambling I mean. You can talk until my ear fall off." She rose her eyebrows offended _why was she the one to be blame for everything bad_. She shut up so fast that it made him chuckle.

"I did not mean it like that I think you are cute when you talk to hide your stress." He continued and started playing with the palm of her hand. Her heartbeat rose and the skin on the back of her hand shivered.

"I am not stress Damon." She was too quick to dismiss the accusation. _Why was she acting all of sudden like a hormonal_ _teenager?_

"Then can you stop biting your lower lip because it is all sort of distracting" he teasingly stated and his word made it worse because she accentuated the gesture.

"Okay, have it I am a bit...all right I am extremely stressed right now." She gave up the pretense

"I am flattered I have that type of effect on you." The last part was whispered as the waiter brought the special cru of the vineyard for them and their entree. She surely needed to drink the first glass faster. She gulped the entire content in matter of seconds.

"Well after all the effort you put in it, I don't think you expected me to react in other fashion. This is a trap Mr. Salvatore." She matched his whispering tone. _Blessed the wine for the quick boost of courage_.

"Obviously it is a trap, which is what I have to go through to get you alone from a second. Now you come in pair." He sounded like a neglected husband for a second and his expression helped to paint him under that light. She let her second hand cross above the table to cover their already intertwined hands.

"Oh I neglected you Damianio, I am so sorry. What I am supposed to do to make all of this right." She raised her hand to smooth the pout on his lips _. She really needed to stay away from alcohol._

"Well since we are in the subject" he raised his eyebrows in a very suggestive manner. Half way teasing because he needed to have her relaxed. She smiled naughtily and pushed his hand away. Her smile brightened the entire room. "I guess that is not an option, buzz killer. Why don't you offer me a dance then?" He extended his hand as the first not of a tango hit the air. She hesitantly took his hand.

* * *

His hand gracefully found its way on her shoulder and elegantly extended her arm. She was the first one to offer a teasing step. She made a half moon. It must have been the performer inside her. He had such a powerful stature that it was fascinating to look at them. She, grace, elegance personified, and he, charm and seduction embodied in a man.

The cat and mouse game, they started was splendid. His hand guided every of her movement with a fluidity that matched her execution. His fingers sensually grazed the skin of her nape. Her leg taunted his steps. She made some scissor movement and he matched her speed. Her hand ran away from his rough palm to draw the curve of her body for the pleasure of his eyes. He followed the caress of her foot around her calf and leg. Much like the game, they play every day in their lives. It was her running away from his touch while her beauty captivated him.

She swiped the ground with her foot in another half-moon step as he caught her by her twirling arm and stopped her slow motion. His hand clasped on her waist and in a very macho swift pull. She was brought back to his masculine embrace. Their body collided at the apogee of the beat. He lifted her for their grand finale; she let her body ascend through his touch. He maintained her body plastered against his, she snaked her way down his flexed muscle, her breast brushed against his chest.

Her red nail trail from his dark hair to his smooth facial skin and her forehead rested against his forehead. Her lips hang dangerously close to his. They stared in each other eyes intoxicated. The guitar and violin notes synchronized with their erratic heartbeat. In unison with the beat, she drew away from him with a soft rotation. His toes faced her heels. The music ended, she tried to walk away from the dance floor. He stopped her moving silhouette and softly kissed her naked back.

Some claps came from the other clients whom obviously thought they were performers. After all, she was a professional dancer and Damon had his years of ballroom dance's practice, benefit of being a Salvatore. Bonnie shyly walked away.

"You are such a tease; you are setting me up for failure." Damon complained. How was he supposed to play by the rule if she danced like that or just looking at her was enough to set his entire body in flame? She cocked her head and raised an eyebrow. _Was he kidding?_ She sipped from her wine and cut a portion of the filet mignon that the waiter brought. She would not say anything. _She would not fall for it._

"How am I the tease? You're the one who wanted to dance on a tango. A tango and you put everything in. my skin is still shivering from your touch. My head is still spinning from your languorous stare but I am the tease." She snorted. He smirked mischievously. He loved how under a little alcohol she was so quick to tell her mind. It was her second glass of wine and it was enough to remove just a bit, of her self-monitoring.

"And you want to talk about teasing. You are the one who kissed me and then had the audacity to call it something stupid." She fell for it just like an amateur. She drove the conversation right where he wanted it to be. _Stay away from the wine._ She told herself as her hand was already bringing the glass to her lips.

* * *

"You know I did not mean it like that. Kissing you was everything but stupid. It was impulsive and it was fulfilling a need that has been there since you opened that damn door and told me to get lost." He drunk from his wine glass and put his fork down. He was waiting for her reaction but it took her a minute to come up with nothing. She stared at him, _what was she supposed to say? Were they putting everything in the open right now?_

"It does not matter, at least not right now with everything. We should not be talking about it. It does not matter." She repeated herself and started looking at her plate. She wanted out; she wanted the narrative changed. _Why did her big mouth always do this to her?_

"It does matter because the next time I guarantee you it will be more than a kiss. It does matter because it got you hot and bothered. You want to play dumb then I will let you play alone because fact is hiding make it worse. How long until we find ourselves alone? What do you think will happen with all this tension? It does matter." He stated calmly. He needed the truth and the deep of their feeling brought up. She needed to stop playing the ostrich. This silence and pretense made the entire matter worse.

"All right it mattered; okay obviously there is some tension. There is feeling but right now, it can't just happen. We have a daughter in the middle and a very good friendship. Why will you want to risk it all just because you found me attractive?" Leila was her ultimate shield. She knew it would stop everything. However, she was using her daughter to mask other insecurities. Damon was the first person she let in after a long time. She had shut her friends out, she had shut the world out, but here Damon Salvatore had made his own place in her heart. She could not just risk him and her daughter. It was too much; she was barely familiar to the idea of having them.

 _Leila, grams, and he were her world._ They made her feel better and find a sense of stability. _Why did he want her to relinquish it?_

"I don't simply find you attractive; I wish it was that easy. I am literally falling in love with you and obviously, Leila is my priority too. I am not asking you to jump in arm just because we obviously have strong feeling for each other. I am asking you to acknowledge that and not to try to claw your way out of it. In long term it will hurt us, I don't want to be bitter about it. I want you to know how I feel."

"I am obviously falling too but I have a past record and it is not the best. Of course, I can blame thing on you but right now you are way too precious to me and it is scary enough. I am conscious that I am fighting a losing battle mostly if you decide to apply resistance. I just don't want to lose you, I don't want you to hurt me, and obviously, I don't know how to allow you to love me. So what do we do now that we have talk about it? Does it make it better to know that I am too fucked up to love you?" her voice was heavy and she refused to look at him.

She had her heavy past and she was not done with her healing. She was moving toward a better place in her mind and in her life. She could not see the progress but they were there. She was out there living for the first time in seven years. She was raising a kid; she was falling in love. However, she was too focus on perfection to see the small details.

"Why don't you let it be organic? What don't you give yourself some credit? You love me with honesty and that is a way that I've never been love before. That is not fucked up. I matter to you as much as you matter to me. I am your friend before anything and you're my best friend. In my book, you love me just the right way. You just need to relax and let it be organic right. We don't have to jump right in; all I want is for us to stop the fight. So what do you say?" He extended his hand. He meant every words that left his mind to be materialize by his action. This was not his big love declaration. This was he putting it in the open and telling her. Take your time I have made peace with my feelings and we will follow your pace.

"We will let it be organic but I need a promise that Leila stays a priority and that does not mean I will be in your bed tonight or even will kiss you tomorrow. Organic right." She smiled shyly as she took his hand. She was already going with the flow. What was the matter in taking one more step forward?

"A man can dream but yeah organic."

* * *

 _ **Late take a break for the cancer tragedy and the heavy chapter. This chapter was just a wink to the fact that there are ordinary people too, they are falling in love, and they need a break. Bless Sheila heart to be that awesome grandmother and great-grandmother. Hope you like this chapter please review, follow, and add to your fav. Kisses until the next chapter.**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Thanks you for your reviews, following and adding to your fav. I really wanted to get this out before school stops me from doing so. I hope it does not appear rush. In addition, I forget to mention it but from chapter 1 to 14 it is been at least 7 months to 8 months in case some of you wonder. Sheila has known Leila for two months also Bonnie has been around Leila for almost six month to six and a half month.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything except Leila**_

 _ **Chapter unbeta and I have very weak ability in proofreading sorry**_

* * *

"I don't want to do it," Leila said between her heavy tears. This has been going on the entire hour. She had made up her mind about the surgery. From her infantile understanding if they saved her, Bonnie would undergo an excruciating amount of pain also end up sick in the process. She had stopped listening. Now, Damon and Bonnie were trying to calm down the little girl.

Bonnie moved from the opposite side where she was sitting to join Leila and Damon on the big couch. The little princess isolated herself in the corner and refused to face the adults in the room. They had bonded against her and wanted to make her the villain of the story. _It will hurt bonnie_ _and she will be sick like me. Why could they not see it?_ Leila thought or interpreted their intentions.

Damon and Bonnie had tried to explain everything clearly but it was hard to stop a child from literally interpreting words and sentences. In addition, the juvenile mind seemed to correlate things in a way that was plausible on the surface. Her parents, Bonnie and Damon simplified the entire process but through the translation from adults' vocabulary to children's one, few things had grasped new meanings.

 _Bonnie will give you a part of herself and that is what you are missing to get better._ Those were the words used by Damon. They were quite simple and summarized the situation perfectly. However, in Leila's mind, well it had translated into something similar but she had added her reasoning. No words had transpired, the little girl had moved away from her father and pushed deeper into the couch corner. She had nested her head between her thighs and slowly but surely she had started tearing up.

"Baby it is not what you think, Leila please listen." Bonnie softly said as she sat between Damon and Leila but closer to the curly head princess. She lifted the light little girl and sat her contracted frame on her laps. The Bennett passed her hand in her daughter ponytail and undid it. _She must have a headache crying like this and having this tight ponytail._ She brushed the hair away from her pretty face and tried to lift her chin.

"They are going to take something from you and give it to me?" Her voice was a mere whisper. She waited from Bonnie to answer and she looked straight into the green eyes. Bonnie nodded and Leila's head went down again. "Then it will miss from you and you will be like me." She concluded. It was because that thing was missing from her that she was sick, then if they took it from Bonnie _. She will be sick._

* * *

"I won't do it." She said staring at her parents. She had made up her mind and nothing could change it. Bonnie looked at an exhausted Damon, his features were strained and he was looking at his little girl with an incredulous expression. _Well she is stubborn just like you she wanted to add_ but not the right time, she decided that having a united front was better. The young woman put a hand on his shoulder and he stopped looking at Leila to look at her. She mouthed to him _I will handle this_.

 _Please do so._ He did not use word but she could understand him. From the both of them, Bonnie was the one who pouts, puppy eyes, and cute smile easily manipulated. However, when it came to tears, Damon never knew how to handle them. Since Bonnie had become part of their life, she was in charge of tears and well he was the bad cop who said no. He sat deeper into the sofa letting the women in life sort out themselves.

He would only be a support; he had accidentally caused this situation and now found it hard to fix his mess. Not that he could do anything, Leila had developed a preference when she cried. It was rather Stefan or Bonnie maybe because she was aware of the pain that Damon felt every time she cried. He was a pitiful actor, he controlled most of his emotions, but that single one always escaped him. He covered Bonnie's little hand with his much bigger one and let her draw some energy from him.

"Princess you are getting all of this wrong. Yes they will use part of me but …" she was interrupted by Leila's little mantra that she repeated while covering her ears. _They had step in petty land._ Bonnie sighed. Why children always found the way to complicate something? She looked at her watch and from the late hour, she drew her conclusion. This night would be another night that she would spend in the Salvatore's home. She was glad that she changed her tonight's shift. She looked at Damon, now it was his time to intervene.

He had the authority and mostly she never brought herself to be the disciplinary parent. She had the capacity but right now, she was all kind of in love with her child. Damon was the type to cuddle but with Bonnie being a bit over the top, he had to step in this role but when Stefan was in the house, the elder Salvatore managed to regain his initial good cop role.

"Leila listen to your mo…" Bonnie's wild expression and the fear he read on it stopped him right on time. He was about to have a Freudian slip. He was exhausted and his filter was not that good. He restarted with his voice still holding his paternal authority. "Principessa listen to Bonnie and stop acting like this you are offending Bonbon."

* * *

He took half a minute for Leila to stop and then she apologized to Bonnie. "That is better. Now baby as I was saying, they are taking just a very little piece of me that they will give you. You see much more like a tree and a fruit. You want tell me what happen between a tree and a fruit, Grams explained it to you when you were gardening together." Bonnie offered her softest smile. She wanted Leila to come to the understanding alone. If it came from her mind, it will make more sense than her and Damon's words. Their little girl was stubborn and had a mind of her own, which make it tricky to sway her in one direction.

Leila sat straight on Bonnie's laps. She crossed her fingers as she tightly clasped her hands together. "A fruit is plucked from a tree and has seed. You can use the seed to grow other tree but you have to be careful while plucking the tree not to hurt the tree." She recited her memorized little explanation and Bonnie was grateful that Leila had become Sheila's companion recently. The matriarch of the Bennett clan had really helped with her and Damon's schedules.

She had lightened their burden; Sheila was a trusted babysitter and she had a very cute friendship with Leila. Damon only felt comfortable enough to leave his child with close family and people he was sure love his daughter. It used to be only Stefan but recently he added the Bennett women. Bonnie co-parented and Sheila helped in emergency when Stefan or Bonnie could not cover for Damon also she provided a nice distraction for Leila.

"So that is what will happen darling, just like with trees and their fruits." Bonnie smiled brightly seeing that the little girl understood. Leila waited for a second to answer but from her expression, it was not enough to convince her. She just nodded and for a second looked at Bonnie. It seemed like the little girl was thinking hard.

"What about the needles?" she asked with the uttermost seriousness as both mother and child were needles phobic. Damon and Bonnie smiled to each other. Damon sat closer to the pair and held Leila's hand.

"You will both be together and what do we always say principessa," the elder Salvatore asked with a reassuring voice.

"You are always safe with people who love you." Leila answered shyly; they were refuting all her arguments.

"I love you little princess, so you are safe with me, what about you?" Bonnie interjected herself back into the conversation. She tightened her hold on Leila and hugged the little girl, she ruffled her hair, and that brought laughs in the room after the long echoes of Leila's tears. Both Damon and Bonnie were so relieved that she finally stopped crying.

"I love you too." The little girl answered but still her voice lacked a bit of excitation. They were still thing tormenting her young soul. Both being used to a hyperactive Leila or a version of her more excited, they definitely knew something was wrong with her.

"Is there anything more you want to know?" Bonnie asked but all the little girl did was to check her head. She nested herself more into Bonnie's embrace and became relatively quiet. Leila was getting a bit sleepy and with the day's stress and the pills, she needed her sleep. She made herself comfortable and Bonnie just made more space for her daughter to sleep. This was something that happened a lot.

* * *

It was instinctive but Leila had hard time parting from Bonnie. Damon often joked that the mother and daughter had discovered how to reattach the umbilical cord. However, it was really just a proof of fear from both side. For Leila Bonnie was slowly becoming a maternal figure and from her young six years, she had not had a real one. Everyone could tell Rose was a shitty mother or just a shitty mother to her daughter and when the woman tried; it was still not enough to fulfill the need of such a young child for maternal affection. With time, that lack of maternal love only created anguish for Leila.

Now the same anguish made it hard for Leila to let go of Bonnie. She was clinging on what she wanted the entirety of her life and Bonnie was happy to oblige. The relationship between those two was fusional. When Bonnie was in a room it was inevitable Leila would follow like a shadow and vice versa. Bonnie was carrying Leila around and finding the most incomprehensible reasons to do so. Stefan often complained about the dependency but mostly out of jealousy because before Leila used to be his shadow.

Damon picked Leila from Bonnie's arm, the petite woman sighed, and the man only playfully rolled his eyes. "You'll have your shadow back in probably six or five hours. You think you can survive that."

"Make it ten hours maybe or god worse twelve hours." She said looking the saddest than he had ever seen her be. With her little pouting mouth and her regretful eyes, she looked cute. He rose an eyebrow _it was Wednesday, which means she slept at his place because she does not have to work on Thursday._ He looked at her inquisitively and she took a defensive posture. She tried to avoid his inquiring blue eyes. _Of course, she would do this._ Damon derived a conclusion.

"Ten? Are you not sleeping here tonight?" He asked a question to which he already knew the answer but he wanted to put her in an uncomfortable position. She shifted on her seat as he stopped midway to Leila's room. She said nothing and he smiled _organic my ass. Of course, she will find a way to slow the process._

"I need to do something in the morning with grams." She really hoped this lie would save her but a look at Damon, she knew it failed. Embarrassed, she closed her eyes and his mischievous smirk just made her feel worse. _Busted now you're looking like a fool._

"Do you want to do it or should I do?" Damon was trying not to laugh but it was hard whilst his blue eyes were staring to that pretty little liar. She bit her lower lip and he only mouthed. "I am coming back" because he needed to drop Leila in her bed.

* * *

Bonnie breathed a sigh of relieve _just go now and apologize tomorrow._ She was really considering running away like a thief in the night. Her heart was beating fast and well she did not want to be alone with him. She had agreed about the organic part but _what means organic really that was some vague term._ She did not really trust herself and Damon. The tension and the chemistry, both of them were not blind to it and tonight anything could happen.

"You're still here; I was a bit scared you will disappear when I come back." Damon said in a joking manner but both knew it was not a joke. She only rolled her eyes; she was still there because her thought distracted her.

"Very funny Damianio" she sassed defensively as he sat back to the couch and grabbed her by the waist to pull her closer. Bonnie's body tensed a bit and when she was sitting between his spread legs facing him, she looked away trying to distract herself.

"Are you trying to avoid me because I talked with Sheila and she told me she was meeting some friends tomorrow? I quote y all need to take care of that sweet child of yours tomorrow because grand ma is going to have some sweet time of her own. She by the way also told me Leila, Stefan and me are welcome for dinner later the same night." Damon said while he stared at the fading green of her eyes. He liked the change of color that happened in her eyes with every emotions. _Light mint green, ah shame._ His hands had a firm grip on her thighs and he was caressing her up and down.

"Nooo!" she answered quickly and the high pitch in her voice just betrayed her. Damon rose an eyebrow, she sighed and took a deep breath "maybe a little, just a little really." She answered truthfully and Damon pulled her closer. Her thighs were now overlapping his and she was in an intermediary posture between sitting and kneeling. He now had his hand on her hips and they were at eye level.

"A little hun?" He said with his voice dropping low and losing some octave. _Not fair_ just to the sound of her voice, her heart started galloping. This was totally, what she envisioned happening. She put her arm around his neck and drew closer to him instinctively.

"Not much" she whispered this time; she was melting like ice under a hot summer sun. His electric silver blue eyes were devouring her and she was getting hot and bothered under that look. She swallowed her air incapable to remember the right way to breath.

"Why?" He spoke lazily and he did not bother to hide any intention in his voice. His hands seemed taken in the same laziness; they roamed around her lower body. He lazily caressed and drew pattern on her thighs before resting his hands on her ass.

"Because of this, you see what you are doing so much for _**organic**_ " she used to word to taunt him. She pointed at his hands resting on her ass to demonstrate her point and he only smirked.

"We might as well if I am already being accused of misbehaving…" he did not finish his sentence and he leaned to kiss her. He waited for her to complete the remaining distance because he intended to give her the choice at each step of this relationship. She was the one who needed to accept and to grow into her feeling; she was the one who had a hard past relationship. He wanted to help her move forward but he did not want to push her. He knew anything built on the wrong timing would crumble. It was taking everything from him because he was not patient, and he wanted _Bonnie as much as a drowning man needed oxygen_. To reuse his own expression.

* * *

She leaned and softly kissed him. Damon let her pull away even if he was a bit unsatisfied but she only moved her arm from his neck to move her hand around his face. She kissed him again but now with more passion and desire. He tightened his hold of her hips and lifted her so she could sit on his lap and roll her legs around his waist.

After few minutes, he took control of the kiss. It was more demanding and he sought out entrance into her mouth breaking the soft barrier of her plump lips. His tongue darted forward and started massaging hers. His hands caressed her clothed skin with reverence. He was slow in his tongue stroke but still very passionate. She moaned into his mouth. She slid her hand below his black t-shirt and slightly pushed on his chest so he could lay on the couch. She was feverously kissing him and she moved her hands to take his shirt off.

"don't mind me or your daughter sleeping next door." Stefan voice echoed in the room whilst he was still standing at the main door. Bonnie moved quickly away from Damon and glared at him as if he was the only guilty party in the room. Stefan looked at them like a concern parent and walked in the room. He sat on the sofa facing the couch where Damon was fixing his shirt and Bonnie was trying to avoid green and blue eyes.

Spreading his legs, Stefan sat comfortably on the sofa. His eyes moved from Damon to Bonnie whom finally stopped avoiding his eyes. Damon moved closer to Bonnie, the Bennett woman just slightly elbowed him so he could put some space between them. She was deeply embarrassed whilst Damon seemed to have no care at all that Stefan caught them.

"So all those rooms in this house and the living room couch is your choice. You are both begging to be caught. Now from Damon I expected nothing less but you Bonnie. Anyway, I will blame Damon for his bad influence now also right now I'm too tired. We will have an adult conversation about what both of you are doing knowing there is a child in the middle." Stefan said as he stood from the sofa. He gave them a last concern look _why do I always have to be the bad cop around here._ He thought and walked away.

Midway to his room, he stopped and added "but if you intend to pursue your previous activity as soon as I leave. Please consider Leila therapy's bills and moved that in a room with a bed."

"I hear you brother" Damon replied as he leaned to kiss Bonnie. She kissed him then pushed him away and stood from the couch. He would have held her back but he knew that the fact that she still kissed him after his little brother's show meant a lot. She was not giving up.

"I am sleeping in Leila's room." She quickly said and walked away from a baffled Damon. She turned as she was walking and added; "just keeping it organic" she winked and closed the door.

* * *

"Grams do you think I can break?" Leila asked as she lifted her knee toward her chest. Slowdown by Sheila's legs brushing the floor, the outside swing was slowly moving back and forth. They had just finished having diner and as usual when they had dinner in the Bennett household, Bonnie and Damon were washing the dishes and Stefan was in the leaving room being Stefan. Today Stefan was more Stefan than ever, after he caught them last night, he decided to tag along in the car and even helped with the dishes.

Sheila did not know if she wanted to deal with the antics of those three kids, so she had moved out of the house with Leila following behind. The matriarch loved the Salvatore brothers; they all seemed to make her granddaughter happy. Even Stefan who often acted as a big brother forced to babysit a little sister he never wished for. That was how their relationship transpired to the matriarch.

The broody man often acted rudely or strictly with Bonnie, but he never ceased to help her. Sheila only assumed it must have been hard for him to have to share his niece affection with some else when he was somehow Leila favorite for years and her second parent. However, he was doing real effort not to exclude the Bennett. He freed time to come for some diners and recently, he had made lists of Leila's allergies, favorite books, and foods for Bonnie so she could have everything ready when Leila came to visit.

Stefan being his organized-self had arranged everything in a small book so the Bennett girl could not lose them. He extended the courtesy to Sheila by making for her an exemplar. In addition, Stefan was Sheila favorite but tonight even Sheila was tempted to tell him to let the young couple breathe. Bonnie was supposed to wash the dishes alone but Damon always insisted to help. Sheila assumed it was a way for the young man to have some alone time with his girl and the Bennett matriarch always kept Leila busy during that time

Sheila looked at the little girl. The Bennett matriarch did not know where to start. _Where is that baby getting all this ideas? When kids have children that what happen._ She thought still sipping on her cup of tea with distaste for the lack of sugar in the brewage. She lifted her legs so the swing could have a proper motion. She cocked her head and look at Leila. _Let me hear this time where this is coming from._

"Are you made of glass chile?" Sheila asked seriously, she was doing her best to keep Leila in a comfort zone. After having multiple weird and incomprehensible conversations with the little girl, she had noticed that often Leila beat around the bush before saying what really tormented her. The trick with that little princess was to be patient and to filter between her constant babbling.

"Nooooo…" the adorable little girl answered completely sure but after a short glance at Sheila's cocked eyebrow. She was reconsidering her answer "are angel made of glass?" she whispered now she was shyly doubting her words.

"I don't really know but I am pretty sure they are made of everything but glass. If it can't reassure you, I don't think you might break but why are you asking this?" Sheila subtly changed the conversation toward what really mattered.

"Plates, papa say we can't put them out because they will break." Sheila just smiled to the incredible way that little ball of curl always put two and two together. Her reasoning always made sense in the weirdest way. She sat closer to Leila and brushed away the bread crumble on her pullover's wide white collar.

* * *

"Oh I see now, but soon it will all be okay. Your daddy just told me." Grams replied trying to push away her anguish. If her worries were to play like other kids outside, it would not last. She was getting schedule in the weeks to come and the only reason the surgery was not an emergency was due to the preoperative management.

"Okay" Leila said without her usual enthusiasm. There was something about the situation still bothering her and her parents had still not found a way to make her talk about it.

"You don't sound so happy about it baby girl. Do you want to tell your grams why?" Sheila asked now more concern as a little frown appeared on the little girl's features. Leila looked away and moved her knees closer to her chest. _Definitely serious._ Sheila noticed because of the protective posture. Leila started nibbling on the palmar side of her thumb.

"I'm bored, when is our tree start to grow." She asked trying to escape the conversation but Sheila just threw her "no bullshit" eyes at the little girl. Leila knew better than to mess around after that look was thrown in your direction. She had witness what happened next with each of her parents.

"In this house when something make us feel sad or bad we talk about it. So I will ask again what is wrong my little sweet angel." Sheila voice was soft, loving, but authoritative. She crossed her arm around her chest and looked at the little girl in the eyes when Leila eventually lifted the head she was trying to hide behind her knees.

"I will change right… when I won't be sick. Please don't tell papa or bonbon" Leila stopped and she was waiting for the answer to continue. Sheila looked at her considering if she should promised a little girl to hide something that might be of importance to her parents. She took a deep breath and nodded because _definitely I won't tell, she will talk to her folks herself._

The old woman knew Leila was more comfortable taking about little things that weighted on her heart with Stefan and now her. If it would affected her father in any way, she would try to shield him from harm and quickly she started doing it for Bonnie too. Sheila could only assumed that instinctively Leila knew that Bonnie was her mother; also, she had witnessed how her pain affected Bonnie. It could be a simple cut on her finger or an entire night of Leila throwing up; the expression on Bonnie's face when something happened to Leila said everything.

"When I won't be sick grams. Is bonbon still going to be my friend? Will she still love me? You know I will be different and she won't love me the same…" it was a miracle she did not cry whilst saying that and it was an even miracle that Sheila did not enter that house to beat Bonnie's ass. A kid would not come up with something like that without hearing it around, which Sheila assumed or in Leila's case lived it.

* * *

"What makes you think that you will change or that if you change bonbon will stop loving you?" she asked worried for a fraction of second that _those fools inside the house wounded that child so deeply._

Leila looked around and she was hesitant. She had not talked about this before not even to Stefan. It had been gnawing her from inside and feeding her guilty feeling about her relationship with Rose. She looked around then whispered "mama and Michele's papa. I heard her say that I was different now and then she stopped loving me the same." Obviously, a conversation that Leila was not supposed to hear but she accidentally heard it. She would have never focused on those words if the following months she did not notice the change in her mother. Her sin was that for a little girl she was intuitive and could draw literal conclusion.

Sheila was not one to shed tears but she felt the salty pearl cross barrier her eyelids and she was quick to clean it away. She opened her arm to welcome the little girl who said everything with such a detachment that it seemed like something Leila assumed was normal. If cancer was not breaking that little girl, the adult around her were doing the job. _She really needed her mommy, her real one._ That though crossed Sheila mind.

"You just come here little thing. I won't tell bonbon but you have to ask her. So you hear the truth from her mouth because never Bonbon would stop loving you like that b…" Sheila had to stop but she felt the need to curse at that woman she did not know. She took a deep breath and tightly hugged Leila's frail body. The little girl shook her head and now it really seemed she would start crying.

"She won't be happy" Leila replied quickly and Sheila just felt the anger grow inside her. She grabbed the little girl hand and bent in front of Leila so they could be at eye level.

"What if your daddy help you talk to Bonbon and even your uncle Stefan too? I am sure she would not be happy if you are actually too worried to tell her how you feel. I will help you talk to your daddy and your uncle together you can talk to Bonnie." Sheila could have proposed to be the only one to help Leila talk to Bonnie. However, it did not sit right with her. Right now Stefan, Damon, and Bonnie were Leila parental structure. They all needed to compensate for Rose's mess and they all needed to be informed of the emotional cataclysm that they all needed to prevent.

Leila was such a happy child but she also was reserved, shy. Much like her mother Bonnie, she prioritized others emotions. At an age where she was supposed to be selfish, it was scary and Sheila had raised Bonnie. If the first time, she had missed the sign that lead to the fragile teenager, with Leila if a mistake could be avoided then it would be. She could not do it because her parental figure where those three.

Leila finally agreed to talk to her parent after some convincing and many comfort words. It had taken almost half an hour but finally she shyly nodded.

* * *

Talking to Stefan had been easy and much like Sheila, the young man had felt his heart shrunk. If they were trying to make this atypical family work, it was for Leila to know that she was loved beyond words. However their entire enterprise was undermine by someone else mistakes and selfishness. In addition, it seemed they all minimized the impact of Rose situation on that impressionable young soul. She sometimes acted so grown up and resilient that they let slide things that affected her because she did not express her hurt right away.

Stefan maybe never said it openly but with months, he had grown quite fond of Bonnie and appreciated everything she did because the changes were visible in Leila. For everything that she now represented for the Salvatore family, Stefan was slightly protective of her, and that was why he was worried about the romantic aspect between Damon and Bonnie. Those two were risking more than just a friendship between them, Damon was bad with breakups, and Stefan had seen it first-hand.

Whilst talking to Damon, Leila had completely broken down. She was more stressed and it had taken a good hour to get everything out of her. It had taken few more minutes for Stefan to translate through the sobs. Now Sheila was keeping company to Bonnie so she would not be worried about the private conversation between the Salvatore. After listening to the full version of everything Damon only wanted two things, the first one was to tell Rose to go to the deepest pit of hell and he will do just that because he was tired of her mess.

Second was to actually reassure his daughter and tell her that Bonnie was her mother. However, he could not do that because Leila was not ready for that step. Bonnie was even less ready than the little girl was. Every time he attempted even to direct a conversation on that path, Bonnie lost all her color and became pale. Therefore, he settled for reassuring her with his own love. This secret was not his to reveal; when Bonnie would be ready she would come out and do it.

He lifted Leila from the ground and adjusted her on his hip. He rocked and swung so she could stop crying. He promised her that he would be there all along when she would ask the question to Bonnie and help her if she wanted.

* * *

Having the tree Salvatore crowding her grandmother's couch, rather scared Bonnie but their expressions did the trick. A crying Leila was a sigh that she never wanted to hold, it always broke her heart, and she always felt the need to rush by the little girl side. She was about to do just that when Damon rose his hand to stop her. He slightly smiled to her as assurance that it was okay but Leila's red eyes were the only thing her maternal heart could see in that slightly dimed room.

She uncomfortably sat on the sofa and moved to adjust herself. _What does it look like they are about to break up with me?_ She was already assuming the worse. If they stayed silent one more minute or if Stefan whispered something else in her daughter ear, she might have two choices _go off on that mofo or beg for forgiveness and promise to change_. Definitely begging she was not ready to lose her daughter. The seconds seemed longer that the empty space between the clicking sounds of the clock behind her. _Begging it was then._

"Bonnie Leila wanted to ask you something and the little princess is a bit worried that you might not take it well." Damon started speaking just a second before the Bennett woman lost her mind and heart.

"Sweetie you know you can tell me everything, everything" Bonnie's voice was not confident. Whatever it was she was bit scared of it.

"Go on bambina, you can do it just like you did with your papa and me or you want me to ask?" Stefan put a supporting hand on Leila's back and slightly pushed her forward. The little girl shook her head and came closer to the couch's edge. She let her eyes fall on the ground.

"Would you still love me the same when I stopped being sick? Would you still be my friend?" There was relief on Bonnie's face and still Leila was not facing her. Bonnie looked at Damon and Stefan wondering where this was coming from. From the expression painted on their faces, she knew she needed to carefully trade right now.

"Stefan, Damon can I have a private conversation with Leila. I want to explain to this little angel something really important." She pleaded with her eyes and Stefan stood up a bit hesitantly whilst Damon did not move until he got a positive sign from Leila that she would be okay staying alone with Bonnie. Both Salvatore brothers left the room and Bonnie moved to go sit on the couch near Leila.

* * *

She cupped the little girl face and stared at the blue of her eyes as she exactly did the day she pushed those seven pounds of life out of her swollen belly. She smoothed the little hair that always found a way to cover that angelic face and she smiled because she was about to tell her the only words that had a real meaning the past six years of her life.

"I would not love you the same, I would love you more because it is going to be a different day. Every new day on this earth, I found a way to love you more so I don't think you not being sick would change that. I, Bonnie Bennett would probably love you all my life and even after that. Remember that when the time would come that you are too old to want your old friend to love you, that time when you become a grumpy teenager and you are the one that don't love me the same. I will still love you more than I am capable of loving." She took a deep breath to smile at Leila.

There were more that she wanted to say, words that she might never have the chance to say. She wanted to say the reason why she Leila Salvatore was _the love of her life and would always be_. However, she kept that part hidden.

"Therefore, would I love you the same when you are healthy and running around tiring me? Obviously not because I would love you more. I already love you more than I did a minute ago. If it can make you happy and wipe the tears of your beautiful blue eyes, I can try to love you the same. Just tell me what you want me loving you more or the same way and I promise I will do it princess." She finished and kissed the little girl's forehead.

"More because I also love you more every second." Leila whispered her answer as she lazily nested herself in Bonnie. That last sentence literally made Bonnie cry like a newborn internally. The only reason she did not voice her tears of joy was that Leila had been worried the past hours and she did not want her baby more confuse.

"Then more it is princess."

* * *

 _ **This chapter was a Leila centric after all, they are this complicated mashed up family because of her. In addition, I wanted Bonnie finally to declare her love to the only person who deserves to hear it, she has done it for the entire city before. I hope you like this chapter. If you did please review, fav and follow. See you and kisses.**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**hey okay this a new chapter and I wanted to thank everyone who reviewed, followed and added to their favorite. Hopefully it will be a good read . please follow, fav , review or do all three.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything except the plot.**_

 _ **Beta by Danielle but I think you know her as**_ _ **isawyouasaperson**_ _ **, she has extremely good bamon and if you never read soulmates by her well you need to**_

* * *

Stefan did not find minding his own business hard to do. He did pretty well at it most days. However, when he felt that it was necessary to intervene, then it was hard to make him see that something was none of his business.

 _If_ _they want to fuck, well I don't give a damn, but right now, I am giving a circumstantial damn_ , the younger Salvatore thought.

It had taken time, but they were finally getting a steady rhythm. Things were flowing, and they were a good parental trio. Sometime after Bonnie was incorporated into the family, Stefan felt that it was the right time to try to step down from his parental role. He had been reluctant to step down at first; he was jealous most of the time for the first months.

However, he was reasonable. He knew how to put Leila's interest first, and Bonnie was the best thing in his niece's life. He had no pride stopping him from saying so, and from the first day they met, the air was clear. However, despite his desire to step down, he found he couldn't. Damon was still immature. Stefan, or "Saint Stefan" as he was called around home because of his sanctimonious behavior, remained.

 _Saint my ass; it was as if having an ounce of reason around here is a bad thing_.

He never thought he would so easily step down from the second parent role and slide into the third role. However, he liked that new role because second seat was the one he had taken by default. It was hard to believe right now but three years ago, Stefan was barely in Leila's life. During Damon's divorce, he became the only stable figure. Damon and Rose were too busy fighting to care about their offspring, from that moment Stefan slightly judged Damon for his lack of parental focus.

Three years ago, everything changed. Prior to that, Stefan had seen his niece maybe ten or eleven times. Stefan and Damon relationship was not that peaceful three years ago; it was almost combative and nonexistent. They dealt with each other when work related stuff forced them to do so.

Damon had pulled a Damon move on Stefan; the elder Salvatore threw his brother under the bus that was Giuseppe Salvatore. Damon was supposed to be the one managing the family business, casino, and all the other shady shit. Stefan was supposed to go to Rome to get his literature and art degree. That was the plan and all was settled between the brothers.

To common understanding, the elder Salvatore was already one foot into family business studying law and Stefan was too soft for the human misery around it. However, at the last second, Damon went behind his younger brother back, pleaded in favor of Stefan to succeed their father because he had the brain and suddenly Damon was growing a conscious but really, he was running after Rose.

Then he left the night before Stefan was supposed to leave for Rome. Being the only son around, Stefan was picked and he was forced into a field he never liked. To say that Damon could be unreliable and untrustworthy was an understatement. He could be immature, but the worst of his flaws was his selfishness. That was what concerned Stefan the most; he knew that if Bonnie engaged herself in an amorous relationship with Damon, she would make it work even at the cost of the last drop of blood in her veins. She had proved her worth and her morality and Stefan was impressed.

The petite woman fought so hard to make her place in this family that he was happy to give away his role, he was happy to slowly becoming Uncle Stefan in function and it was funny to have her around. He could truthfully say that if those two lovebirds broke up, even he would be affected. He would have to change his coffee habit, and he really liked the coffee shop where she worked and her babbling in the morning. He could never tell her the last part because it would only make it worse, just as he made it worse by telling her that he was maybe considering her as a good friend.

 _Now she sits ten centimeters closer to my brother on the sofa, yet I go in her work place every morning to share a coffee because, well, we are friends_ , he thought reluctantly. His friendship with Bonnie was an abnormal thing but it was a thing, as much as her awkward habit of hugging him or concerning herself with his wellbeing. She sat too close to him on the couch, which often forced Damon to carry her in the opposite side because his brother was territorial.

 _Never would I see Bonnie like that, eww… not eww, because she is all sort of attractive, but she is more an annoying sister that I have to tutor_.

Tutoring forced Stefan and Bonnie to be closer. From Stefan, she learned everything about the adequate meals for Leila, her habits, and activity because Damon promoted all the bad ones. In exchange, Stefan learned all the cosmetic care for a little girl.

 _Now I can make a very neat French braid and know how to pick and coordinate an outfit. Bonnie would say she was tired of her daughter looking a mess in those streets._

He also liked Bonnie because she had a certain modesty in her emotion that echoed with his. She was literally helping everyone in the house to bond. She was becoming the soul of that complicated family, all while just being herself.

* * *

Honestly, if someone did not mind his or her business in that house, it was Bonnie. Stefan could only count the number of time when she would give him a random hug, such as when he would leave Leila room after it was his turn to give her the chemo medicine. The first time it was awkward because, like Damon, he liked to pretend that it was fine, that it was not that painful. The second time it was comforting because she understood, and the third time it was familiar and expected. In addition, her constant inquiry for his mental wellbeing was a needed help. That was why he went for that coffee every morning.

"You doing alright?" she would say as she was holding his coffee in hostage and the fresh aroma tortured him. It was the closest thing he had from his Florentine home. It was so rare to hear that question asked in the very masculine environment he shared with Damon, where vulnerability was hidden. With his brother, they would share a bourbon and called it a day.

"I am doing just fine. Bonnie, pass me my coffee and go for your shift." He would growl, but the girl had a sixth sense. If it was a lie, she would sit for a second with him and she would talk about what was stressing her with Leila as she tried to observe his reaction to each fact. Once she found the trouble, she never pushed to get answer or words from him. She knew that he was not comfortable talking about his feeling with her, but at least he could know he was not alone.

'You don't look so good, do you need Damon to talk about it?" Stefan would just roll his eyes at her because that was how they interacted. He acted annoyed but was grateful she cared. "Well okay, I will put in that extra cream today." She would do so; she would had a lot of cream but she'd also force Damon to be a big brother. With Damon, Stefan was opening himself and dealing with Leila's situation. It was getting as easy as such a thing could get.

The younger Salvatore, in his very restrained and modest way, appreciated the Bennett girl. He thought she made a better man of his brother. In another situation, they would get his blessing, even if they did not need it. However, the problem in the equation was Damon.

Stefan knew his older brother could be a dangerous variable because with him, the amount of love he felt did not matter. Damon was a wild card and could accidentally break anything. He did not want to have a dissuasive talk with the pair, but it warranted a talk. If those two broke up, Leila risked losing her balanced family and he himself risked losing a friend. Damon did not know how to do a clean break up, not when so much love was involved. He had seen it first hand and, well, Leila had been collateral until he stepped in.

However now they would all be collateral. Damon and Bonnie dating involved five people, not only themselves. Right now, they were all awkwardly bonded because of hard times, their ties with each other were all jumbled with Leila in the center, and now they were adding another gravitational point. They were changing the dynamics for everyone. For Leila, it was a strongest family structure and if it fell apart, she would not come back from it. He had seen it before, how the fall of her nucleated family almost broke her little soul.

* * *

 _ **Florence three years ago.**_

"You're such a puta, from all the assholes in this planet you had to go for Enzo. My best friend, my freaking best friend!" Damon was shouting at the top of his lungs. He never felt so angry, and for Leila he never looked so scary. Her father had never looked scary before this. The little girl stood there consternated. She looked at her mother, who was now the one to scream. She was even louder.

When Rose's hand collided with Damon's cheek, Leila's eyes grew bigger and it was her turn to scream. She could not understand. She smoothed the tulle of her pink tutu. She could barely understand what was happening, but she knew it was bad. She barely moved from her standing spot, she was three years and a half. Marital dispute was not something she could process, but she could definitely understand violence of any type, verbal and physical. Those two adults in the middle of the living room were offering her a spectacle of both.

Leila tried to move away but she was frozen. Big fat tears were forming in the corner of her redden eyes.

"Papa, mama," she whispered after her scream did not bring a stop to the madness. Damon and Rose were so engaged in each other that they did not notice the presence of their daughter, but would it have stopped anything at this point? Emotions, hatred, and anger were running high.

"You are the one to talk when you are the man whore around here. What have I done to you that you never did to me? I was tired of being your little trophy wife, your free babysitter." Rose picked a vase and threw it in Damon's direction, but the blue-eyed man quickly avoided it.

Leila needed air, a lot of it. She was suffocating and the world, which was already extremely large, became even bigger than nature. It spread so fast that it swallowed the little girl, a blurry curtain fell on her eyes, and she was helpless. Her nanny had just accidentally dumped her in the middle of a catastrophic mess. What was happening to her parents? Where were her parents? She was scared and she needed them but sadly, she was scared of them.

Damon shouted a bunch of obscenities, it was many words that she didn't understand. However, Leila knew it was meant to be mean, very mean, and very bad. She could hear the hatred and as a child, she was more sensible to the emotion that words carried. At her age, meaning was a complex concept to grasp, but emotion was embedded and common way of communication. She saw the very fat tears fall on Rose's cheeks just as they were falling on hers, she finally moved. She wanted to go grab her mother legs and console her. She wanted her mommy to stop crying but before she made it close enough, Rose's voice stopped her when she retaliated with her own batch of mean comments.

She was lost; the little girl was lost and it happened to be in her own house. She grabbed a table's leg and hugged it for dear life. She wished it were her father's leg, just as it was always when she was scared. Just like the first day, she went to ballet class and all the other kids were taller than she was. She wished it was her mother warm arm just like after every nightmare, because she was living one right now. She hid deeper behind the table, never letting go of its leg.

She shut her eyes and pressed hard. The dark curtain fell on her, and she wished it would stop everything. It only made it worse because her hearing became sharp, the words became louder and louder. She sat on the cold ground still holding on the table's leg.

"Mama…papa… mama… papa." Surely one would come to save her. She felt arms circle her and pull her out. She tightly held on those arms, her chubby fingers dug on the soft flesh. They came; they came to save her. Quickly she opened her eyes because the horrific noise had not ceased.

Her light blue irises met the dark blue of a shirt's material. She was tearing on that wet spot and she was hesitant to raise her head. When finally she raised it, she met a very worried pair of green irises. She looked hesitantly, where did she know him from again? Uncle Stefano it finally clicked. She tightened her hold on her uncle, her newly found hero.

* * *

"Are you okay, bambina?" Stupid question to ask, but really, poor Stefan did not know what to do. Even he walking in the house had stopped nothing. Rose and Damon were still virulently going at each other throats. If for his adult ears this was shockingly inappropriate, he could barely imagine what it was like for that little scared thing in his arms. Stopping them would not work. When Damon and Rose fought, it was endless and unstoppable. At least from the time he used to hang around them before they got married, they could argue in front of a crowd without an ounce of shame. He could still not believe that they were married and this scene only proved that he was right to be skeptical.

Leila did not answer, but she tightened her grip around him. He needed to think quickly and he needed to protect this little baby from this madness. He dropped the file that he brought for Damon to look over and carried Leila out. They sat on the porch swing in silence for a minute; he slowly pushed the chair, and listened to her hiccups and sobs. Stefan did not know what to do and he was not familiar with his niece. However, he definitely needed to do something.

"A luxury babysitter, that was how you treated me. Someone to take care of your child. Yes, I went behind your back and enjoyed it. He treated me as you should have. When you did not neglect me for your child, you had some shit to do or someone I guess."

Stefan could hear them from outside. It was becoming nastier and nastier with every second; soon, what would come out would be too offensive for that little thing. They would shatter her.

Who gave Damon the right to have a child? Stefan thought angrily. He knew his brother's selfishness.

Leila grabbed his forearm for support. He needed to take her away from here, and the next sentence forced his decision. "I have to because since she was born, you treat her like a pariah; I have to feel a void here. It is a good thing that when I am dumping your ass I don't have to worry about you wanting to keep her." Stefan pulled his phone out and texted Damon. He would see it when he would have cool down. Then he texted to cancel his entire day.

He had no clue on how to take care of a little girl, but he would figure it out until her house became a safe environment.

* * *

He brought her to a small coffee shop on the paved Florence road. They were attracting attention; it was hard to miss a crying little girl in pink tutu.

"Eat up, bambina. There is nothing a chocolate gelato cannot cure." The server put a gelato cup in front of Leila before Stefan could even ask. He was a long time patron of the coffee shop. She smiled and turned to face the crying little girl. Leila hesitantly brought a spoon in her mouth and for sure, it did the trick because soon she was so busy eating that she was silent.

"Thank you, Cara, you saved two lives here," Stefan said, feeling grateful. The tears started really to break his heart. She was so petite that every sob seemed like she would shatter. He asked for a coffee and looked at Leila eating. He started wondering what he would do an entire day with a child.

"Do you want another one?" he asked and she nodded. They brought another one and another one until Stefan discovered that it was a bad idea to use ice cream as a way to avoid conversation when she puked on his suit jacket. He sighed and removed it.

"Uncle Stefano what is a puta?"

Stefan's face paled. He moved uncomfortably on his chaise.

It had gone there, wow. He looked at that little princess, clueless. Oh god, what am I supposed to say. Think Stefan think. He was panicking, he felt his palm become sweaty, and he rubbed them against each other.

"You heard that today, right?"

Leila only nodded.

Okay, that is the beginning of an answer. Stefan, let's get to this.

"You heard a lot of very mean things today that you should never repeat because they hurt people. Puta is one of them."

She nodded and he breathed pure happiness.

She bought that, he internally exulted.

"It hurt mommy." She said it so sadly and then she faced the ground.

Stefan sighed. Why would it have to be so hard?

"It hurt you too, right? That is why your papa was wrong to say it, but he did not mean it. Your father is really nice, so I think he made a mistake and he would apologize." Why was he lying on Damon's behalf? Actually, he was lying to protect her and just to calm her pain. He did not want her to feel like that because of messy adults. From that instant, he did not really matter. If he was able to take care of her for an entire day, he needed to see her happy.

He brought her to the circus and after two hours, she seemed to have forgotten the entire misadventure. She was moving from carousel to carousel. Soon she was laughing and giggling. For a first time in a long time, Stefan really felt like he did something useful. Leila begged for more gelato, but Stefan had a firm no, she apologized for his suit and pouted. However, he said no and offered liquorice candy in exchange, and by that means, he discovered sugar high. He promised himself next time, everything sugar will be avoided

 _There will a next time, this little baby is just amazing, and being angry with Damon should not be a reason to miss out on more time like this._

They ended the day in the acrobat tent and it was just what Leila needed; seeing men and women flying around. She talked so much that Stefan thought she would never stop. From that moment, Stefan became Leila's hero. Stefan received an angry call from Damon but he was quick to shut his elder brother down. He should have been that concerned about his daughter when they were tearing her soul apart with their violent words. Stefan did not like to mind other people's business, but sometimes circumstances called for it. When Leila was part of it, then he would mind anyone's business and it started on that semi awful day.

* * *

 _ **Present**_

"Can we now talk about this?" Stefan asked Damon; finally, he had a grip on his brother. Damon had tried to avoid him for the past few days. However, he was not giving up.

Damon rolled his eyes and grabbed his bourbon glass. He just wanted a break before Leila and Bonnie walked in.

"That is none of your business, Stefano," the elder Salvatore answered. He was not about to argue with his brother on who he should date or not. What was happening between Bonnie and him could not reflect on Stefan's life.

"I wish it was none of my business so I could sleep peacefully, but you made it my business when you brought her in the family and forced her on all of us. To some extent, you are not the only one falling in love with Bonnie. Leila is head over heels for the woman and I myself have a growing and genuine friendship with her," Stefan countered. If he was so adamant to talk, it was not from a sanctimonious feeling, but out of fear and self-interest.

Damon stopped on his tracks to just listen, because it was not like Stefan to admit that somehow he had interest in a situation. His brother always acted as if he was above everyone and always did everything for greater good. He sipped his bourbon and tried to make sense of everything.

"So you want to dissuade me from dating Bonnie because you are afraid to lose your friend. Stefan, that does not sound like you, but again, what makes you assume that this thing between me and Bonnie thing would go sour?"

"Obviously, I don't want to lose my friend, but when it comes to me, I am a minor inconvenience. There is Leila and I know none of you intends to hurt her. I am not trying to dissuade you of anything because that would be presumptuous and selfish of me. I am a fair witness of how good of a person Bonnie is. I am not going to lie; she has impressed me and I already apologized for our harsh beginning," he said, surprising Damon. That was a conversation Damon and Bonnie had not had.

He was not surprised that the two got along; they shared a very similar nature. They both always had that big martyr complex, or a need to be a hero, and Damon happened to take advantages of both. Much like Bonnie, Stefan had to sacrifice a lot for the people he loved. Damon was forced into taking care of a cancerous daughter. Rose had stepped down, and he barely knew how to be a full time father. Bonnie was also pushed into helping; she was asked and her willing and loving nature did the rest.

However, both Bonnie and Damon had the option, but the choice was predisposed. They were Leila's parents, even if it took time for Bonnie to come around that truth. Stefan chose the entire situation; he chose to give up part of his life for his niece simply because he loved her and he was grateful for what she did for him prior to everything. Stefan, like everyone, fell in love with Leila and her comforting smile. It was something that he never shared but the day he found that scared little girl, he found a savior. The family business was eating his soul; he had no enjoyment in human misery. Collecting debt and using other humans was not really the greatest thing for someone with such a good nature. However, that single afternoon in company of that little girl with her bright smile and her innocent questions put a balm on his heart.

With no effort, she had fixed his ugly day, so he felt forever indebted, and with time, he fell in love. She made him smile when everything else just pushed him further away from the man he had dreamt to be. She literally made him a better person in exchange for some ice cream and silly answers to very awkward questions. For three years, Leila brightened his life, so when it was her turn to fall in dark corner, he knew what he needed to do. That little girl was his best friend. Therefore, it did not matter whose business he stepped in, she was his priority. He was careful of what was allowed to be a burden in her life. If cancer could not erase that precious being, he would not let her parent do it.

God knows Damon had done it in his time. Stefan was just being careful.

* * *

"You obviously love her, but with you, Damon, that is not a guaranty. Right now, I am worried for this entire family because I assume you are not. You are so hot headed and now you are in love. Did the two of you talk? Because I know, she is your best friend. You know, even Bonnie can't lose you and you can't lose her. You are such a better person since she has been in your life and I feel bad doing this. You are my brother and I love you. Just for that, I would want you to be committed to a woman like Bonnie." He was being sincere and truthful. His concern was everyone and he was objective. Bonnie could be the greatest thing in Damon life, which was why he was not asking for more than a well-constructed relationship.

"However, at time like this what we want and what we need might be very different things. Do you need more than a friendship or just want more? Also, does she need you; will you do right by her? Are you more than support systems to each other? Are you using her? Did you answer all those questions? Bonnie is also my friend and I care about what she can lose too."

He managed casino for a living and some other dark businesses. He knew better than anyone that a gamble needed to be well thought and right now, the gamble was everyone one relationship. Everyone was affected at different scale.

"Stefan, I am not stupid. Of course, I have been thinking about this and that is the reason I chickened out every time I wanted to open my damn mouth to express how I felt. For a longtime, she was whom I wanted and I tried never to think about it. I was just the friend she needed. However, I can't do that anymore because now I need her." he stopped mid tirade because he was coming to a realization. He might have impulsively kissed her the first time but right now, he just was in love and in need of Bonnie Bennett. In a very pure form, he loved her and, unwarranted or not, the conversation with Stefan made that fact clear.

"I have stopped only seeing a walking bone marrow source months ago. Then I stopped seeing a substitute mother for Leila. I stopped seeing my best friend and Leila's mother only; she was more. Eventually all I saw was a woman who I wanted to offer the world to, the woman I needed because now I was mature and intelligent enough to handle her and give her what she needs." He drank more of his bourbon. He hated having open feelings conversations, but recently it had become a thing between him and his brother. Another achievement of Bonnie Bennett, so it was normal that such a worthy person became a prized friend to people around her.

Slowly Damon understood where his brother was coming from, but also, somehow, this conversation cleaned his doubt away. He was seeing a clearer picture and Stefan forced the objectivity into the conversation.

"I wish I could think or have your clarity. I apologize for gambling this entire family on just how much I need to be with her. However, she unapologetically takes my heart and mind; I would have never risked anything if I had not been so in love. You might not see it but this is the safest way to go. I respect her too much to pretend I'm just being her friend when she deserves my unconditional love, and I refuse to punish the both of us. The amount of love we have for each other if suppressed, would have destroyed our friendship."

Damon was now unstoppable and his words with their sincerity were just the right choice to show Stefan that he was wrong to assume the worst. His brother had made the right progress and had bettered himself. From that moment, Stefan knew that maybe this man was far from the one who years ago picked himself. This Damon, this mature brother would not be careless with his daughter well-being.

I don't have to worry anymore about finding a crying Leila. I can step back, I don't have to, but I can. He finally realized that he could pass the torch. His only interest was Leila, and Damon just proved that he and Bonnie were the best thing for their daughter. Maybe them being together would only make things greater. It was complicated to accept things right away because for so long he was the stable parent, but now she needed an uncle, not an extra father.

"I am even scared to tell her how I feel because I want her to heal. I know what she needs even better than she does. I went with an entire 'let it be organic' speech when I know I have passed that stage, but I want to give her what she deserves. Also, I can assure you, Leila is our priority. I know that you think that I will possibly mess up because my record of accomplishment is not flattering. If this between her and me end, I won't take Leila in hostage. Give me some credit; I am done being a crappy father. I have not been one for a year and a half now, and I am sorry. I sometimes forced you to be her father in the past, so I can't blame you for being worried." Damon said.

"You don't have to apologize; you did not force me into anything. I enjoyed being her substitute father, but right now, I have to let go because she has a great one now, and an amazing mother. All she needs is a loving uncle. It might not matter but please, make that petite woman happy because if you don't, Sheila will have both our heads. Also, keep your baby making out of my living room." He extended his hand to Damon, but the elder Salvatore just hugged him. He could not finish what he had to say, but Damon understood that he was also being a bit protective of his friend.

Clearly saying take good care of my friend would have been asking a bit too much from Stefan. A little body came to join the hug. They both looked down and all they could see were heavy black curls. Stefan bent to lift Leila and turned to face the door where Bonnie was standing. He politely nodded and she smiled at him.

* * *

 ** _kisses until the next chapter and i hope you liked that stefan centric and now have a better idea of goes through his mind._**


	16. Chapter 16

**_hello lovelies, this was a quick update but my brain is trying to escape reality. so here we go. thanks for the follows, favs and reviews, it just make my day. i hope you will like this chapter. if you do tip the writer_**

 ** _i disclaim everything even the medical knowledge that might be enhanced for drama_**

 ** _now special thanks to my amazing beta who went through this superlong chapter, Danielle also known as ISAWYOUASAPERSON, check her fics that are amazing._**

* * *

Damon observed her small sleeping frame; he knew that he would find her exhausted. This past week, she pushed past her limits, juggling her multiple jobs, Leila and dancing. He slowly walked toward her and carefully tried to lift her from the couch. Lovingly, he wrapped his arm around Bonnie and twisted to offer her some comfort. In his muscular arms, he secured her as he did his best not to wake her up and she comfortably nested her head on his chest.

He always marveled at how light she was. Such a petite woman. The desire he felt to protect her never ceased to amaze him. The elder Salvatore felt as if he was doing a poor job attempting to shield her. He knew that stress has somehow modified her behavior, but he could not get her to be truthful or just to let him in so he could help.

 _Maybe you pushed too early from a relationship; maybe she would have been more open with her best friend. Am I asking too much from her? Am I still doing the same mistakes?_ He started to think about it, he took the time to analyze and to decorticate his action as a boyfriend. He quickly brushed that idea away, for the first time he could swear he was doing his best.

He knew quite well that the pace of their relationship satisfied Bonnie, she was not suffocating under the usual pressure. In addition, he knew her well, so well that he could pinpoint any change or new fears. It was scary to know someone in such depth. If she was not speaking up about her fears, it was because she was afraid to fuel his. Therefore, he felt like he was slacking. The little assurance she needed, he failed to offer.

She nested herself closer to him, her fists tightly grabbed his black shirt. Even in her sleep, she was attracted to him like a magnet. The magnetism in their relationship was stratospheric and only Leila's presence seemed to act as decency factor. Any moment of deserved loneliness, they were often all over each other. It was beautiful to admire the gravitational exchange between them; they never really knew whom the satellite was or whom exerted the strongest pull. It was hard to understand why they did not have sex already because it seemed both their bodies yearned for it. The physical desire was there, but so was the emotional requirement and obligation to fulfill more than carnal desire.

 _You obviously know why, she is not ready and it is the wrong time_. He sighed as he came up with a valid answer.

 _ **xxxxx**_

Damon was well aware that physically and hormonally Bonnie's body did not match her mind. Her mind was stealing in that healing process and on the road of recovery. She needed to recover the sacrosanct respect of an emotional and physical relationship. Falling in love with Bonnie helped Damon understand some very soulful aspect of Bonnie. He started to scrutinize Bonnie under different light, studying every of her sophisticated layers as only a lover is attentive enough to do.

The Bennett girl was beautiful and truthfully, he could not remember finding a woman more attractive but past the physical, there was that mind. He did not need to compare her body with anyone to know that she was definitely magnificent, and after the little sneak previews he was getting each day, well, he'd just say sinning became a passion. He was still dreaming about her tone abdomen or the soft skin of her breast.

 _Getting lost again, you can't spend the entire day dreaming about being buried in her. Oh actually been your favorite activity recently_. He contradicted himself.

He spent the day fantasizing about her and he did so because it was the best way to survive her and his desire. He looked at her beautiful sleeping face and he was surprised that she did not wake up in his arms as she did the previous night. She was a light sleeper but he understood how exhausted she must be. Tonight was probably the only night when she allowed herself to sleep.

They had a doctor appointment tomorrow and finally they would start Leila treatment. It was great news but in their constant state of worry it did not translate much. Bonnie was definitely exhausted from doing too much on too little time. For the last week, she had worn supermom's costume and cape. She desperately tried to relieve Leila from every of her worries, but there was only much amelioration to perfection could accomplish.

As a mother, Damon would agree that Bonnie was perfect and still, she tried to make time to be a charming, sexy, and adorable girlfriend. There was a reason he was so much struggling with his desire and it was her. He had been married, but he was only discovering the equilibrium of a good relationship. As a husband, he was a jerk, selfish, self-absorb.

 _I could add more to the list and still miss some pejorative terms but to summarize, I took and never put myself fully in. right now I am learning to put the right amount of myself without being extremely selfish_. He could personally see it now that he was attempting something new and it seemed genuinely to work. The best part was that it did everything to match himself and not somehow to please Bonnie. He was not be a less selfish person just for her or just with her, he simply had grown into this man.

 ** _xxxxxxxxxxxx_**

Now maturity was allowing him to see more of himself than the perfect illusion that he had created. Simply put, he was less selfish but still he kept some of that trait, which was why he was tight lips about his involvement in the surrogacy. There was progress also, pain forged and bettered his character. A year ago, he would not have cared about how much Bonnie was ready for a sexual relationship, he would have not dwelled in her psyche as he did right now. He would have barely understand her past the superficial that she was so masterfully able to display.

She physically wanted him but mentally it would have been too much to handle. At this instant, he needed to unlock her mind and just make her feel that he was there. He wanted part of her burden because truthfully it was their burden. She could lie as she wanted but the reason she was weird this week was the fact that she was scared for Leila and she was scared for him too. He had lost the habit of dealing with this situation alone, now that they did it as team, but he still understood her better than anyone could or did. He was doing some emotional hiding too.

Bonnie was extremely stressed and had every right to be. The operation presented no risk for her, but the same could not be said about Leila. She wanted reassurance that everything would be all right, however she did not look for reassurance where she was supposed to do so. She did not want to dump her worries on someone else even if that person was already making sure to console her. She had become overbearing with Leila and Damon was overbearing with both Leila and her.

The petite woman was not used to so much care, she felt as if she was taking too much from him. It was ironic because it was as much as what she gave to everyone. He was pampering her and wisely sharing his time between her and Leila. She did repeat that she would just have a minor surgery but he had answered that he was taking care of her because he knew that she would not do it herself until Leila got better. He had also enlisted Sheila's and Stefan's help with that specific mission.

Damon had turned her into the family's second center of attention. He forced her to go for movies, dinners, and dance practices. Dance practice was Bonnie's favorite and it did help her relax, she was in her element and the only moment were she was truly carefree and enjoying the lack of reality restraint. In addition, she did not have to let go of her baby girl during this time.

Movies and dinners were dates just time spent together with a lot of heavy kissing. Hour-long make out and serious foreplay. _She is trying to get me in this bed and I am not against it type of make out. Surely, we might have another kid soon type of foreplay. No need to be more graphic type of thing_. He thought and already he could not stop the grin across his face.

He remembered more about those dates and their steamy details. Those were his personal favorite because he might have stopped being a teenager but almost having sex in a theater was still a turn on. _Personal note: Bonnie eating popcorn was a turn on, Bonnie drinking slowly from that straw major fucking turn on. Bonnie rubbing and grinding against my dick while heavily kissing the side of my neck, you know the drill_. He almost whispered turn on louder than his mind.

 ** _xxxxxxxxxx_**

Meanwhile, dancing had turned into a family activity. She had a public to cheer her, and they had to assist with the birth of beauty and perfection. Leila insisted on coming for every session. Bonnie was not use to practicing in front of anyone, and it generally distracted her. He remembered the first time he saw her dancing; she did lose her concentration and quickly stopped. However, with Leila around in her little practice room, she felt the need to deliver her best performance. The room was no longer small because he was making a point spoiling her and it was easier for Leila to get there. He rented a dance studio for her, one that was extremely close to his apartment.

He liked the pure happiness in Leila's eyes every time that she saw Bonnie dancing. Bonnie adored the bit of normalcy that it gave to their family. It was a change from the medicine or the worried night. Leila was even learning two or three moves. However, it only eased her nerves for the moment being because he could still feel the tension once they came back from their escapade. The week had been a nightmare and the fact that she was so adamantly trying to hide her pain, distress and fear from everyone just made it worse. Her emotions were on edge, her resistance was running thin, and how could she hold that way?

She was not the only one who was at her breaking point; Damon also was somehow breaking. He had been the longest in the turmoil. His resistance was exhausted in the last minute and all the effort he made to stay strong was thinning, maybe because he knew that someone could pick him up now. It was easier to suffer loudly when you knew that someone would care about your tears. The saying was true; the closer they got from the end, the harder it became to deal with everything.

So much bottled up pain, fear, and so much modesty in expressing their emotions. Whatever the level of comfort in which their relationship had fallen from being friends, lover and now to almost whom was an important piece of the other's life, they never allowed the other to see their pain. Both Damon and Bonnie were aware of the other misery, and they truthfully tried to remedy to it. Bonnie would bend her entire world just to make him feel better. For the first time, it did not feel heavy to go to such lengths for another person because it was not required for her to do so and it was reciprocated. It was not expected and even less asked.

* * *

As soon as Damon set her on the mattress, she woke up.

"Did she wake up, do you want me to go check?" she quickly asked and that was what he was talking about. She looked exhausted and her first thought was Leila's well-being and to ease his load.

 _Can you hate how someone is so selfless and still love that she loves with no restrain?_ He already knew the answer to his question because he had started doing it.

He sat by her side on the bed and bent to kiss her.

"She is fine and you need to rest and if she needs anything I am here, Stefan is here and tonight even Sheila is here." Damon said as he unlocked his lips from her. She gave him a small smile and he knew she was about to stand up just to go check. He grabbed her waist to stop her and she really could not fight his strength.

"Damianio, a minute." she just said. Really, she needed to go see her baby girl. It seemed ridiculous that the closer they got to Leila getting better, the more she became preoccupied also, she still felt as if she did not give Leila enough love. If her daughter could think that she might stop loving her, then maybe she was not doing something right.

"Bonbon, babe what is wrong?" he was not supposed to ask. However, he was getting a bit worried and he knew what was worrying her, the exact same thing scared him. If tomorrow went wrong, he could not even think about the next thing. He felt as bad as she did but he wanted her to talk while he kept his fear silent. He wanted to be there for her and their daughter just to be the rock. Maybe he was being slightly hypocritical because Bonnie's attempt to do the same did not satisfy or please him. He had been in Leila's room a couple of times too.

"What is wrong with you, you look exhausted and come here." she threw back his question at him; they have been playing this game for a week now. It was weird that they slightly lost their means to communicate fully in attempt to shield the other. It was fortunate that they had a certain level of connection that allowed them to see above the masquerade and the fake display of what they presented as strength. They hid their emotions so much from Leila that somehow they thought it was ideal also to protect their partner with the same mechanism.

Hypocrisy was running a bit deep this week, so he just nodded that he was fine and attempted a distraction. He removed his black shirt and closed the distance between them like she asked. He was already cupping her face and caressing the smooth skin of her cheek.

 ** _xxxxxx_**

Sometimes physical comfort healed the soul as deeply as a good conversation. However, to have some healing properties, it required a certain level of intimacy and trust. That was what they needed this night; when words faltered on their tongues but hands were bold enough to grab. She let her hand run through his dark locks and locked her green eyes with his very talkative blue ones. He slightly bent to kiss her and it was hesitant but needy.

His touch on her could carry as much meaning as a prose of beautifully arranged words. It all depended on the pressure he put on the contact between his hungry lips and her fulfilling ones. He kissed her and conveyed his need for her warmth, proximity, and support. She let him take control of the kiss because he was in need to let her know that he would just take care of her and she needed to let him in.

She opened the barrier of her mouth, letting his tongue slide in because she was welcoming the love and care. Her tongue moved with his tongue; it was not a physically passionate joust of tongue but a heavily emotional exchanged of passion. Their tongue carried the emotion that their mind had suppressed. The way Damon hands ran under her blouse to play with her skin and her moan just said so much. They were open to a different language and approach.

He quickly removed her blouse and discarded it somewhere on the floor. He carefully pushed her body deeper in the mattress; the care with which he handled her body displayed his affection. When he removed his mouth from her mouth to start the voyage to her covered nipple, she moaned. He sucked for dear life on the erected nipple and she arced her back to give him a better access before he removed her bra.

He placed himself between her legs and she locked him in a tight embraced. It was meant to be comforting and protective. He kissed his way from her breast to her navel where he teasingly dipped his tongue in. she was melting in his arms but when his hand undid her pants, she slightly tensed and he knew what even she was not aware of. He went back to kissing her lips and her body relaxed. He lifted her and switched their position so she could be on top and because he knew that sometimes, she was more comfortable when she was in control.

The first minutes when she let him handle the foreplay was her gift to him. Abandonment was something she still had hard times with. Their physical exchange was a sophisticated tango and really the wrong moved could derail everything and it was all in subtlety. Damon needed to know when Bonnie's mind was uncomfortable because sometime her body could take pleasure when her mind froze. Which ultimately happened when in the heat of the moment. Not right now, though. She removed Damon pants and quickly did the same with hers.

She had never been that much naked in front of him and suddenly it also echoed with being emotionally naked, her hands entered his boxer and she froze for a second a bit in panic because they were obviously going there. He looked at her and he knew she would try to bypass her discomfort but he did not want her to do so, he lifted her and placed her below him.

"We will get to it when you are ready." He said and went to kiss her. He knew she needed reassurance because she might have taken him stopping like a rejection. Bonnie's doubt emerged because having sex with Damon would mean so much more than it had meant in the past, but in the place where she was right now there was only as much as she could take.

Did she desire him? _yes and it was so painful to desire someone that way. I really wanted this but again it was complicated as when you thought that you knew what love was and did silly things in the name of it for the wrong person. Now you are literally in love but what if you are wrong. However, you are scared because well it is insane and you know this the right person but..._ She did not make sense and her thoughts ran in circles.

"I'm ready, I want you, and we will have to do it sooner or later." She said feeling as if she needed to contradict him and she thought half of it consciously but her subconscious was against it. Damon gave her the most adoring smile and kissed her again just to reaffirm his passion, desire and love for her. He left her panting and extremely aroused. She held him tightly and locked him between her legs, as she wanted to stand in her position.

"I know that you want me and that literally make it hard for the both us. However, I also know that you are getting use to the idea of me as a boyfriend, of us as couple. There is no rush I don't want you to feel pressure to show me that you desire me because you do that every single day. You want to do it when you are sure that we are not a mistake, so let's figure it out while we stuck at steamy make out."

"I love when you give me thoughts that I never came to conceive. I do really want you and I am almost sure that we are not a mistake but I am trying to get used to the type of boyfriend that you are. I'm trying not to use sex as I did in my previous mistake. I thought it could glue people together, but when you are past love and you are just staying with the person as a punishment, well…" She did not continue because she did not intend to share that bit. Sometimes she just found herself pouring her life out around Damon without meaning to.

"I'm not used to being this type of boyfriend either, but there is a first time for everything. Now can we actually sleep because tomorrow is going to be a busy day and there I might just need the type of girlfriend you are." He kissed her goodnight.

* * *

Doctor Fell's office had never seemed so small. The woman looked at the little crowd in her consultation room. It had changed from the first time she met that little girl. The situation evolved from a single father to a room filled with whom she assumed was the uncle and the grandmother. She sat and pulled the examination and routine test out. She smiled to Leila who was offering a bright grin while she barely moved from Bonnie's arms.

"Wow this is some committee we have here with you." The doctor noticed as she went through more pages of Leila's medical history. She was still having a hard time as she tried to figure out how to go through the rest of the process. A transplant was a very complicated procedure in general but with children, it was just harder. This was literally the hardest part. It was not replacing her stem cells that was difficult, but prepping her for the replacement.

"Well apparently they all found time for this, sorry if we crowd the room." Damon said with a little hint of grumpiness. The Bennett and Salvatore were all packed in the room, so packed that they could clearly hear each other breathing. However, he was happy that everyone somehow had decided to clear his or her calendar to support Leila. It was not so long ago when he was haunting hospital corridor alone. He knew when to be grateful. He was not so long ago, when he had to get used to the hard conversations and the approximate understanding of hard medical terms. Therefore, he was grateful but his stress did not permit him to appreciate everything.

"No, not all. It is no trouble. We often appreciate supportive familial structure like yours. However today might just be the right time for everyone to be here." Sounding relieved, Doctor Fell added. By now, Damon had been too accustomed to doctors not to understand the underlying meaning of her relief and statement.

He knew what the next statement was. She was about to come through with a hard news to take in and now he was grateful from his burgeoning family. He was glad he gave up when they all insisted to be part of this routine preoperative visit. He was now happy that he was so scared of Sheila's glare that he could not tell her to get out of his car this morning. Whatever was about to be said here, Damon was sure he would need his brother support and Bonnie would need Sheila's one.

Before the doctor could even ask, Damon spoke. "Stefan and Miss Sheila can you take Leila out for a second."

Bonnie looked at Damon and her arms tightened protectively around her daughter. The elder Salvatore moved his hand to smooth her forearm and by the same occasion tried to lower her defense, which were being raised high every second.

"It is just for a second, she will right back." Damon said calmly, now he was just talking to Bonnie.

He knew that the Bennett girl was a bit on edge, she had been the only one awkwardly silent during their ride from Mystic Falls to Atlanta. She had been tense the past days, and she had latched on Leila more than she did usually. However, he did not want to disturb her coping mechanism. It was a hard week and they were all stressed.

Sheila slowly took Leila from Bonnie's arms and the painful expression in her granddaughter's face said it all. She let go of her daughter with slight resistance but she did let go. It was stupid but this last week she really felt the need to cling to Leila. After their conversation and the little confession of the princess, she felt as if she needed to do more. She needed to give more love, she needed to be more there, and before she was already giving her everything. Now she was giving her everything and even extra and she still felt the need to give more.

* * *

"Are we in for other bad news?" Damon asked worried and Bonnie took his hand. Her heart beat as fast as his did. They both looked at doctor Fell bracing themselves for the worst. They were both sitting as straight as they could and their heart were clearly clinging on the fragile structure that was their rib cages. It felt as a Damocles' sword hang over their heads.

"We are starting Leila's treatment today and it will last for three days prior to surgery. The transplant will then follow." She said and both Damon and Bonnie breathed a sigh of relief. They held hands tighter but after a second, Damon felt as if something important was being held from them.

"There is more, right? What is it this time? What awful news, since that is the only thing we ever get." It seemed his resistance had chosen to disappear at the worse time. You can only bottle up for a moment, the pressure still made it explode. Doctor Fell merely flinched, she was used to parents' outburst, and she was surprised that Damon did not have one before. She had given him some of the worst news in this same room. Bonnie gave her an apologetic look and the doctor sympathetically smiled because she understood.

Bonnie moved closer to Damon and leaned to whisper comforting words also reminded him that Leila was in the next room. He was the first to tell her always to keep a mask in front of their daughter. She understood his pain, she felt his worries, but she was also there to be his backbone. She was there to remind him that he could do all of this when the light went out. She kissed his cheek and told him, he could borrow the strength from her and she could handle this little part if it was too much.

That last part sobered him up, it was the wrong time, but he just knew why he cherished her so much. He only sat straighter and smiled.

"Family, right?" Damon answered. They were going through everything as a family and he was grateful for the shoulder.

"Sorry Doctor Fell; I guess we're a bit under pressure." Bonnie apologized and Doctor Fell quickly brushed it off.

"Don't worry about it. Hopefully, there will be no problem with Leila's treatment but the next three days, she will need you more than ever. It might be the most painful time." Both Damon and Bonnie's faces fell. "To have a chance of success we have to destroy her entire immune system and that means a complete body irradiation for three days. The procedure is painless and mostly asymptomatic in adults, but Leila is a young child and we can't tell the full extent. She will need her parents." Explaining the potential complication and pain would have only hurt Damon and Bonnie more. The doctor only made a quick assessment.

All the little princess' parents understood was that their daughter would be radioactively poisoned until she had nothing in her body that would able to reject the transplant. They did not have time to prepare her and maybe it was a good thing because they did not want to scare her or explain this. They both became speechless and the masks of calm and confidence were crumbling. Bottling up their feelings would be hard today.

* * *

Through her entire life, never she would have thought something could be more painful than having her entire pelvis remodeled to allow an 8-pound baby to pass through her and make her way into the world, but she was wrong. She was terribly wrong and her fingers digging through Damon's palm did nothing to stop her pain. Lost, she looked through the glass.

"This is all for her to get better?" The question was a semi rhetorical one; she was in need of comfort from Damon. Right now, only he was able to understand, it did not matter that her grams was holding her hand. She looked only at him and Leila because only he suffered as much as she did. The supportive presence of Stefan, who was leaning against the wall, did not help. Only Damon could understand. He placed a kiss on her temple; he was not able to answer her questions. He was trying to convince himself that it was all for the better.

Bonnie did not want to be there, she had no will to go to this atrocious situation, but she had the strength to do so. Her strength was right behind those glass windows. The medical equipment surrounded her little baby, who was alone in that room. However, it was really torture instruments surrounding her.

"Can she receive a sedative or anything to just ...I don't know something to stop this?" Damon pointed toward the scared little girl. He had the impression that their little girl had turned into a laboratory rat and they were all morbidly observing her. Bonnie just nodded agreeing with him.

"It is not physically painful, at least not right away," Doctor Fell replied, trying to ease Damon, but both Damon and Bonnie gave her a skeptical look. They did not believe it was not painful; it was a full body radiation. Leila was about to have her entire body bombard by radioactive chemicals and rays. How was it not supposed to be painful?

 _She can't go through this alone, at least someone needs to hold her hands, and someone needs to tell her that it will be over soon_. All Bonnie wanted was to run inside that room and shield her baby.

"Can I just be inside with her? Please? She looks so scared. Too young to be over there alone..." she had a hard time forming cohesive sentences. She needed her brain not to cry and now coherent sentence were a luxury she was not able to afford. She chocked another sob and Damon really tried to whisper comforting words to her. He needed her to keep everything together. For Leila's sake, Bonnie needed to keep the tears at bay and for Damon's sake, she thought she needed to be a rock.

* * *

She could see that she was draining him; she felt his attention as much on her as it was on Leila. He was taking a great time comforting her while all she wanted was for him to focus on their daughter.

"Hey, I am okay, don't mind me. I am sorry for acting all kind of weak right now. Sorry I am really sorry." She told him. She saw a little muscle contract on his jaws.

He pulled her so close to him that she had to let go of Sheila's hand and he partially obstructed her view of Leila. He made her face him for a second. Bonnie saw a fraction of anger but it was more subtle, it was exhaustion, a brew of strong emotions.

As much as he understood her, it sometimes just angered him how she could so much withdraw herself from the equation and consider herself unworthy of support.

"It has been an hour since we are standing here. When she told us what was about to happen, you held my hand and said we could do it. We are alright. I have leaned on you for an hour and you did not complain. You are literally my strength. You and Leila, so please not right now, just don't do it right now. Let us be a we, a family when we need to be. There is no need for bravery right now, let me takeover and let me be your strength. I need to know that I am being there for my family, just let me be there." She needed to relinquish control.

She had held him straight for an hour; her sweaty palms were a proof. Her wet shirt still preserved the prints of his previous tears. Today Damon had actually openly cry on her shoulder. Right now it was too much, too painful between the different injections of chemicals, the wincing. He could only shed few tears, she had given her shoulder because at that instant she had been capable of restraint and he had just let the seal break and the tears had escaped. His emotions had taken life of their own until they overwhelmed him. He choked on his pain, failing to process it, to bottle anything up.

The wrinkles on her shirt screamed of how tightly he held her. Her bones would have melted in his arms if he had held few more minutes.

She nested herself in his arms. Stefan and Sheila looked at each other and left the room for a second because that was the respectable thing to do. This was not a moment were they were allowed in. It would have been preying on Bonnie and Damon's intimacy and they would have overstepped the grey areas of their life, which was extremely precious. Bonnie refused to weep openly for minutes. She was afraid that somehow, Leila could see her. It was impossible, but she did not want it to happen.

She tightly grabbed his shirt and she cried in silence but every of her tears echoed in him. The resonance of his pain in his own heart was deafening. She held on to hid shirt until the material melted with her skin. The sweat in her palm sunk into the textile. He kissed the crown of her head.

"You are doing just fine, don't worry I am here. I am taking care of you."

She tried to turn to look at the windows. She wanted to be done with her tears so she could face the window and just see how her baby was doing.

How can you let this happen? Get yourself together. Stop crying please stop crying. She thought and she really tried to stop. However, she could not. Damon was drawing circle in her back. The warmth of his hand was so comforting, it lured her into crying more. She had found his shoulder and now she could not stop crying. Choking the sob was hard enough. If she did not cry right now, she would do it when Leila would be able to see her tears. She would have not been able to hold it until later when she was alone because what was to come would be worse. The radiation was the easiest part; the aftermath would be a nightmare.

He almost crushed her against his chest, when she tried to force him to stop, he just kept her shielded against his chest and hugged her tighter. Between the tears and him, it was hard for Bonnie to breathe.

"She can't see us right now, you are not hurting anyone. Baby it is okay, I got you." He understood all so well. He had his cry, and he could now manage. They would be both functional once Leila left that room but right now for an hour, they were allowed to be a mess. He knew he wanted her to cry in front of him because he felt the same. She had worries and he did not want to add more on her plate but their pain echoed with each other misery. Only she could make his pain go away and only he could make hers go away. He rocked her for several minutes while he kept his eyes on Leila.

"Sorry, but now you need to stop, I am sorry but now you need to bring the mask back. She is coming out. Breathe and I am sorry baby. However, she needs us now. They're done." He whispered as the machines stopped spinning around Leila.

Bonnie pulled herself away from Damon. She was struggling, but it was time to be the picture of serenity and just to put the pain on hold as they did everyday. She would do it when the light would be off and only Damon would be looking.

"How do I look?" she asked, hoping her eyes did not scream her distress. He bent to kiss her and it was warm, comforting, passionate, and loving. He held her for a second; they took a deep breath in tandem.

"You look beautiful; you look like her collected mother." He brushed away some drops of tears attached to her eyelid.

"Princess, are you okay?" she asked as she rushed by Leila's side. She was already wrapping the little girl in her arms. Damon slowly walked toward the bed and just waited for his daughter's response. Leila looked at them hesitantly. It was a pretty facade, and the masks were holding on. Leila hesitated between the painful truth and an attempt to be brave.

The little girl finally shook her head. She was not okay. Today, she could not lie. Today she was trying another type of bravery. She wanted her dad and the person who had become her mother.

"Papa...Bonbon," she cried and sobbed because her insides were burning. She wanted to puke, she had a headache, and she was scared. She was in such excruciating pain. She cried like the kid she was, for the first time she cried without that little worry in her mind that made her believe they would disapprove. She cried because only her parent could make the pain go away.

 _They are magic; they have superpower and fix everything_. It did not matter if she cried in front of them, she really needed her parents, and they were there.

"We're here, okay princess? We will make it go away." Leila was already zoning out in Bonnie's arms. The Bennett girl was shaking, her baby was not falling asleep, she was blacking out. It was sudden and silence fell upon the roof. She lightly beat her fist against Damon because she could not speak and she needed him to do something. If she opened her mouth now, she would only cry but she was already doing it. She beat; she pushed until he understood what she wanted. He looked at her worried that she might break, but he needed to go get Doctor Fell. Leila lost consciousness because of the pain, or was it the bleeding? Was it the headache she complained about or all of the above?

Bonnie clasp on Leila was so strong that Damon had to hold her and lift her away. She screamed when she was forced to let go of Leila and her entire body went limp when the nurse and the doctor surrounded her daughter.

"My baby, Damon our baby. My baby Damon my baby...my baby... she is not okay...my baby please...my…" she cried and sobbed. Damon just held her while she was suffocating.

She finally calmed down as Doctor Fell put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"It is normal for her to black out. Your daughter went through a lot today and obviously, her body is extremely tired. Nothing alarming. She is champ, your little princess." She smiled and left the room.

Damon finally released Bonnie. The petite woman was already by Leila's side. She kissed every inch of that face.

 _A champ, a champ just few more days, and you will be okay. Mommy promises. I will make it all go away baby._

She felt Damon kissed the crown of her head and then he kissed Leila.

"A champ just like you. Both of you will be okay. You promise, right?" He needed to know that his women would come back safe and they would both be okay.

* * *

 ** _if i butchered your emotion, i am sorry because well this was a hard chapter to write. Now I Hope you liked it and kisses until the next chapter._**


	17. Chapter 17

_**Hello, I am back with a new chapter and I'm all happy after reading all the review you left so thank you for following, reviewing and adding to your favorite. The next chapter will probably come in July because well exam time but you still can try stimulating the muse. Now hope you enjoy this chapter and review a lot. Don't forget to follow and fav.**_

 _ **Thanks to Danielle aka isawyouasaperson for being an amazing beta and giving excellent pointer.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything.**_

* * *

"Breaking every single bone in your body won't help; it won't make you closer to her or even make it better..." Damon said as he put his phone down and stopped recording her.

Bonnie swiftly stopped and threw an exasperated look toward him, hoping it could force him to shut up.

"I tried it before and I am just trying to save you some time." He continued while he ignored her nasty look. He was accustomed to her threatening attempts to coerce silence.

She stopped dancing, out of breath, and pressed on her aching calves. She knew he was right but she was frustrated. She found a way to roll her eyes at him mid movement and he snorted. She grabbed a bottle of water and gulped from it; she had been dancing for hour and was showing no sign of fatigue. She bit her tongue; she would not let him force a banter just because he wanted a reaction.

She ignored him and went back to her choreography but, as a taunting gesture from the gods, Bonnie fell heavily when she attempted a move as simple as a jete. Her legs were giving out on her and if she were not so stubborn, she would have stopped at the first signs of tremors. She grunted so angrily that Damon looked at her with concern; it seemed those three days were really taking a toll on what was left of her mental strength. That did not stop him from taunting her even more; he liked to be right.

"I'm going to say it because your proud-self will never. I told you so, Babe." He smirked confidently at her.

She threatened him more with her glance. He rushed to her side but Bonnie raised an arm to stop him.

"Don't help after you gloated at my pain. He calls himself a boyfriend." She bit back and again Damon snorted.

He ignored her and helped her back on her feet. She leaned on him, feeling her legs melting, and her bones burning. She was doing entirely too much, as always. She tried to free herself from his overbearing arms but it was an effort made in vain. He had her locked in a flesh prison. He gave her a firm look to force her to stop.

 _It is for Leila, she needs it, and she needs something for her normalcy. I already failed my promise once; I am not doing it again_ , she thought as she broke away from his arms and forced herself to walk back in the center of the dance room.

He reluctantly let her fingers slip out of his hand. He hopelessly let her caress his skin as she softly moved her hand out of his clasp.

"Just record another shot." She said as she stood with determination.

She looked straight ahead and already her leg was rising up in the air. She fortified her core and plastered on her most beautiful smile.

He hesitated and slowly pulled his phone out. He looked at her, so beautiful and strong. Loving her was easy and hard at the same time. Thrilling, but a cause of exasperation. She was beautifully flawed, but perfection easily attached itself to her.

The eternal headache and plague of my life, he mentally complained.

She was everything he hated to love sometimes, always fighting teeth and claws for every opinion and desire. He decided that he had let her stew long enough in her silence and solitude. He needed to access her mind, discover the words hidden behind the tormented silence and the restless nights after the hospital visitation.

* * *

"Leila asked for a dance video because she misses your mother-daughter practice and the family time, she did not ask for you to turn it into a contrition act." He looked at her as he rose his eyebrows in answer to her unsaid question. You heard me right Bennett, he resisted to ad with the gesture.

Her green, anxious irises avoided his calm blue ones for a second, and then they furiously attacked him and preyed on his mind. _Come again, Salvatore?_ She let her eyes carry the warning. When he walked toward her, she took a step back.

He stopped in his tracks, offended by her distance. She was past the emotional barriers; she was building a physical barrier. He looked at her and tried to rein in his volatile temper. He was not about to start a war out of a stone wrongfully thrown. He might have to let his tongue lash out and bring her to some sense as Sheila suggested previously.

 _'Harsh words have the tendency to create cracks on the toughest skin and if there is something with my Bonnie, the more she suffers the tougher her shell becomes. She might just push you away involuntary_.' He remembered the hoarse voice of the Bennett matriarch as sweet tea burned her throat.

At the time, he had attempted to chastise her on the matter. Sheila was a believer of tough love, but the wise woman had softly explained to him that there was a time for sweet words that healed the heart and another for harsh words that opened the mind by violently cracking the insecurity away. Bonnie often needed to be shaken out of her slumber and stubbornness.

 _'Right now, she needs your words to break through this hard shell; she is too old for a whipping. I can't help much boy, and I doubt you want me in your business. You need to drag her out of her coping mechanism_.' She had ended her advice.

 _I need to create the crack so I can sneak in and heal the wound_. He agreed with himself. He did not attempt to come closer but he carefully picked his words.

"You want to be stubborn, break a bone, and get the entire surgery canceled by making your bone marrow not viable? You already have a large amount of video, why don't you take a break? You want to act as if a video will make the situation better. She is behind a room made of glass; she is being poked like a laboratory rat. Whatever you do, it won't make it better," he sincerely suggested. He saw the quick change in her eyes and he knew that he had created his path through her mind.

A look at her appearance made clear that she needed the break. Her eyes showed signs of exhaustion; her skin was lustrous from the sweat. Overall, her entire posture pushed him to analyze how much more she could do before she fainted because breaking something had already happened and still she did not want to stop. He finally came closer and she let him do so. He grabbed the side of her arm and pulled her extremely close to him. He felt a bit of his worry wash away. She tugged at his shirt as she did every time she wanted to let go of her distress, it was her way to say that she would express her pain.

Bonnie wanted to push until physical pain overwhelmed emotional pain, until her body could only focus on the pain that she could heal. The three days were taking her life force away. It was a horrific situation. Every day she had to go through the fainting, the bleeding and headaches. It was a painful thing to witness someone misery but it was worst when it was your six-year-old daughter. It only got worse when she was unable to make it go away; she was not even able to be a comforting shoulder. There were an entire room between her and Leila.

Due to the possible complications caused by a full irradiation, the transplant specialist placed Leila's in a sterile glass room. That was Bonnie ultimate breaking point because they took away even the possibility to console her daughter. The Bennett girl tried to push through exhaustion; she was really trying to give the performance of the century. Dancing was the only way she could help her little princess. If a perfect jete could make her daughter smile or clap with excitement, then she would do jetes until it became flawless.

* * *

"Take another one; it is not just about the dancing. I don't want to let her down again. I don't want to break my promise to her. I can't do anything for her with that glass between us, she is freaking scared every night because we can't sleep with her. I'm tired of letting her down; I'm tired of explaining every night that she has to spend another night without her dad and mom. I can do this right, so let me do this," she said as soon as she ended the routine. She stood ready to restart and she barely looked at Damon.

"Leila is not a ballet critic, but she is a pretty good emotional reader. She will spot it quickly if you are not enjoying the dance, and you stopped enjoying it after the third time. Now, obviously I understand, but you did not put her in that room. She knows that and it is about to be done," he answered as his hands finally wrapped themselves around her small tired frame. For that moment, she seemed to melt in him and let her entire body go; she had given up on pretending still to have control of her legs.

"She knows it the same way she knew that I would never stop loving her for something she has no control over like her health. She knows it the same way she knows that when I leave your house every morning that I will be back the next night. In case you haven't notice our daughter as a serious fear of abandonment but who can blame her? Both her mother did it at one point of her life." Bonnie finally voiced her true concern. She looked at Damon because they both never spoke explicitly of Leila's fear.

It was an unspoken fear, but it showed itself every single day, and only seemed to regress with the past month. At least, Bonnie thought that, until the little girl had her break down about her stopping to love her when she would get better. Leila was scared of losing anyone, she clung on the people she loved more than any child normally did.

If Bonnie stepped out of the room, or if Damon stayed gone too long, Leila ended up in tears. It was the primary reason that had lead Damon and Bonnie to spend an excessive amount of time with her at the beginning of their arrangement. Now that they were forced to stay away from her, all Bonnie could think about was the possibility that a fear they were slowly winning over would return stronger. In addition, she did not want to break a promise older than Leila was.

"Oh, that it is something she has to grow out of. You can't carry Rose's cross and yours too. Leila is a brilliant child, she understands. When was the last time she waited in front of the bathroom to make sure that you would come out? When was the last time she waited all night in front of the door for you to come? She has concluded that we will stick by her side. She knows how much we love her, and sometimes we have to hope that it is enough," he reassured as he kissed the crown of her head and tried to push her worries away.

"But I made a promise to her. I promised her and I already broke it once. I don't want to do it again," she whispered as she beat herself up for so easily giving up when Leila was born. She thought about her promise and she felt that little shame, which always haunted her.

"I doubt you promised her to break a leg while dancing or that you promised her to punish yourself," he chastised. She looked at him with a doubt and a questioning expression. He quickly tried to push her growing doubt away.

"Last time you made her promise to not tell me what gift you were getting me, she did not tell me the gift but she told me about the surprise. You bribed her with chocolate gelato and a promise to give her ballet classes when she gets better. Now you know our daughter as no notion of secrets, words spill out of her mouth and never has she told me about the promise of you breaking a leg."

"She does not know about it, no one except me knows about it. It is in a letter that I wrote before her birth and I never brought myself to give it to you and Rose because it was also addressed to you. I still remember every word and the promise I made." She looked at him, detaching her cheek from his chest so she could have a glimpse of his surprised reaction.

"Dear Baby and future parents of Baby, I hope you are good people because Baby will probably be an amazing girl. If you are, please, if you ever tell her the truth can you let my words reach her …" she started crying before she could continue. Memories assaulted her and a dark time slowly clawed its way back into light. Damon silenced her with a tender kiss; he did not want to hear it if that was how it made her feel. She was shivering in his arms and her voice was breaking with each words. However, she wanted that letter finally explored so she let another word out.

* * *

 _ **Florence, four days before Leila's birth**_.

"Still talking to it, what does it bring to you?" he asked as he grabbed an apple and carefully cleaned it before taking a huge bite. He leaned on the wall and stared at her. He did not like it when she talked to her baby; he hated how, with each day, Bonnie was getting closer to that thing. That thing which lived in her belly was their meal ticket, and their way out of this mess he created.

Bonnie said nothing for a second. It. her child was not an it. She protectively placed her hands around her swollen belly. She stared at the space occupied by the kicking being; the bundle of life pushed against her belly and a little hand appeared against her skin. Bonnie quickly moved her hand so she could wrap it where the little hand was pushing. She felt happiness at the contact.

"It is a she; she is girl, not an object," she said in rebuttal. She caressed her belly in apology and she tried to settle down. She swung her legs with her mind still focusing on the little kicks. Her mind wanted to push out his voice. She did not want anyone referring to Baby as if she was an object.

He looked at her and fear creeped through his entire being. The situation was changing and he could feel her growing affection for that thing. She was falling in love just when she was not supposed to be. Her boyfriend started strolling away from the wall he was leaning on and came closer to her. However, with each day it seemed he was never close enough to her, which was probably why she was falling in love with her baby.

"Whatever she is doesn't matter. He, she, or it, that thing it is a way to survive. You should not get attached to her, in few week she will be gone," he said coldly as he took another bite of his apple. Bonnie felt the weight of his words; she bit hard on the inside of her cheeks, so hard that she drew some blood. She felt her baby kick with anxiety, her anxiety. Her boyfriend's words were the truth and at some extent, she used to feel the same.

However, that was before she met Baby. Baby. That was how she chose to call the child. Why baby? It was affectionate, affectionate enough to show her love. Nevertheless, it was impersonal. She was advanced enough in her pregnancy, she was at that time when she needed to pick a name, but with Baby, she could not do it. It would actually materialize her attachment. Baby was the perfect name for now, and it was as temporary as the presence and the love that little kicking ball brought in her life.

Bonnie took a deep breath and she was ready to tell him that she understood but still, Baby was not an object and until she gave birth to her, Baby belonged to her and only her. She looked at him with the weight of anger pulling at her mind and she bit her lip ready to furiously defend her child. She let her thumb rub against the weird small finger trying to tear apart her skin.

* * *

"Sweetie, no, that is bad, baby girl. Don't push on mommy's belly." She intended the sentence to be a whisper; words that she usually avoided saying in his presence transformed themselves in a roar. She wanted him to hear that for her, until a certain instant, she was that child's mom.

He threw a nasty look toward her stomach and tried to process her words, but he failed. _She is going to mess this up for me, if she continues to act like this. She might never give it up_ , he thought as his angry eyes never left Bonnie who was ignoring him. He swallowed as much air as he could, he needed to think, and he needed to pacify himself. _You can get through her; you can do it. Pressure, despair, and fear. One might work, or even all three._ The young man quickly came up with a way.

After spending so much time abusing the good nature the Bennett girl possessed, he knew how to infiltrate her thoughts. He knew how to push her to the point where bending her morals was not a problem. This thing in her belly was not a baby; it was two tickets to America and a large amount of casino debts clear. He looked at her belly and his eyes viciously slid along the midline. How he wished the creature could already be out, but at the same time, as long as the thing lived in Bonnie they could still live in this luxurious Florentine hotel.

He looked around the five stars room into which the future parents of the child moved them. The couple apparently feared for a miscarriage or some shit.

 _Fuck, the reason does not matter but, well it got us the room_. He looked around the rich ornamentation of the room, the ostentatious furniture filling the large space.

He swallowed gulps of air. He could not lose the fortune that this baby was, and he was not losing a penny because of her stupid attachment. He quickly texted something on his phone.

 _Pressure, definitely pressure_. A smile sat on his manipulative features before he put on the mask that long before had gained Bonnie's affection.

"Baby, I am sorry but all I want to do is to protect you," he said as he took a spot next to her. He forced a concern expression and tried to soften the edges.

He grabbed her hand and slightly caressed her palm. He intelligently understood that Bonnie needed a companion. That was probably the reason why she indulged in those primal maternal feeling. If he had simply taken the time to be present.

 _If you had only taken the time to monitor her. Imagine if suddenly all those carefully thought plans fail just because you let her get attached to the merchandise._ He shook his head slightly at the thought that he could lose so much just because he was incapable of getting over his addiction. Bonnie's little pregnancy once again opened his way into the Salvatore casino. Giuseppe was so much excited at the idea of getting a grandchild that he was getting lax. However, that did not stop his debt from growing. The same way his addiction followed him closely, bad luck seemed never to leave his side and the new director of the casino, Stefan Salvatore, was not showing any signs of generosity.

 _Stefan Salvatore or not, that future Salvatore baking in Bonnie will clean my tabs and we're getting a Bonus on top_. The thought of what was to come made him focus on the task ahead. He needed to make sure Bonnie stayed on board with his selfish plan. He had led her so far and now, he could harvest the fruit of his hard labor. He pointed at her swollen stomach and let his voice appropriate the perfect intonation of concern, love, and care.

"She, that little thing inside, can't be yours. I know you wish her to be, but right now, because I made the wrong choice…" he theatrically stopped and forced the panting. He tightened his grip around her hand, much like he viciously snaked his way into her mind. She looked at him with the same affection that always kept her attached to him; he recognized her devotion to their love. She softened and finally her hand left her belly to rush in attempt to comfort him.

"I know what you might think, I thought it too. They look like reasonable people. This couple seems concerned, so you think maybe, but with those people, there is no maybe. If you want to keep her then maybe you are not scared for her safety and ours." He looked deep in her eyes and said nothing. He was biding his time; he was going to apply strong pressure.

Someone knocked at their door and his head quickly snapped to face the door. His heart jolted with joy and his mind settled. It was exhausting to fake the flow of concerns. He loved his Bonnie, what was it not to love about her? Pretty girl, with such a need to be loved to the point where she acted stupidly.

He released her hand and walked toward the door. He carefully opened the door and before he could say a word, he was shoved against the wall. Bonnie let out a scream and the brightest smile lit his face. _Showtime indeed, pressure right_.

"Lorenzo, please not in front of her, you are stressing her," he whined, but Enzo was just helping as he asked in his text. The man was a collector for the Salvatores and right now, he was standing as an intermediary between the eldest Salvatore son and Bonnie. He did not attempt to move as he still glanced at Bonnie. The Bennett girl was turning pale, and because he understood how she thought, he knew that she would soon attempt to rescue him. He pleadingly asked Enzo to add more to the drama.

"Well I heard stress might induce birth and that is why you are all still okay. She needs to push that baby out. The boss is getting restless; he gave your stupid ass a way out just because that pretty girl agreed to work for us to pay your debt. Now being the always-generous soul, he could have asked far worst than her pregnant and living in a five-star hotel. I came here to check how it is going; we are getting impatient."

She heard him speak and she tried to think about those worst options. She saw Lorenzo pull her boyfriend in a corner. She felt the fat tears fall, she needed comfort, and the past month only one person could give her that. They had shared so much conversation and she knew that soon it would end. Soon, she would have to give her away so worst things would not happen.

* * *

The cold wind of the old city hugged her as the wind softly caressed her skin. She looked down on her swollen belly trying to forget about the scene that just happened in the room. To avoid all stress, Bonnie had moved to the balcony of the suite graciously paid for by Damon, and she took in the mesmerizing view of old Florence that it offered. During her entire stay in the marvel of wonder that was the historic city, she always appreciated the view.

"Better right, way better. I know you like the wind," she said while a small smile slowly appeared on her face.

Her arm hugged her belly in the way she had become accustomed to; she looked far away, trying to steady her sight on the old church's roof. She really loved those old buildings and she was sadder every day that this beautiful city had become an oversophisticated stage on which her everyday nightmare acted their horrors.

She loved the smell of years of history that clogged the walls; she loved the dusts that broke free of the sacred churches and old roads. She loved Florence, until they made it her prison and sometimes, when she lacked lucidity, she loved Florence because Baby would still contemplate that beauty when she left. The city would be a confidant, a friend in which to get lost, and sometimes a reminder when nothing would be left of their relationship. This city was the place where the sweet and tender friendship between her and the kicking angel existed and it would forever stand as proof.

She looked far away, as if her eyes could do what she had attempted month ago, run away and actually break free of the constraint. She could have had her way out, but she did not chose it because she loved until she was driven into the tomb.

She hungrily devoured the air; it seemed she was always breathless. Her green, dreamy eyes leveled with the lower part of the city, the one that seemed forgotten like her. The same old city, which birthed the new city at the price of her own beauty and soul, much like herself and what was to come.

Her swollen feet started to ache and she carefully sat. She looked at the stars crowding the sky and she felt that melancholy which is so characteristic of endings. Soon enough, their way would part. At that thought and the anxiety it brought, she felt the baby kick and move away her organs.

"Sorry for thinking about it. I am not happy about it, but soon we won't be together. I thought I will feel better with each day closer to the end but now I am scared." She felt another kick and as usual, she took it as an answer. It was their way of communicating.

Bonnie was a child with a baby, much like other children, she dished out more that she could chew. She never expected to form a bond with a bunch of tissue and cells, but the first echography brought the heart sound. The amazing sound of life building itself out of scratch, the traumatizing sound that announced the presence of another being. She had stayed silent, let the heartbeats of the child roar until they tore a path to her own heart. She had opened the first act to the classic tragedy that followed.

Much like the classic Greek tragedy, she was a heroine that was a gift to the dark deed of fatality. As Jocasta, mother of Oedipus, she was slowly becoming victim of her maternal instinct; she was simply unable to do a sacrifice. She had befriended her child through her loneliness; it had followed the major echography when the sex was revealed. When finally the it had turned into her, the Bennett could no longer ignore the kicking being.

She fought through the need to name the life she was so cautiously sheltering, but still, she ended up giving her a name. It was unfamiliar but so intimate. Baby girl, Baby, and Sweetie; all terms of endearment because she thought a name was personal, binding, but those little endearing terms were worse. They bound her and never could she free herself. After months of silence and no company because he never really let go of his addiction, she found herself exchanging words with her belly, replying to kicks. Soon, she had those very serious conversations with Baby.

Tonight she might not have said it, she might not have admitted it, but truth was that it was probably the last conversation they would have. She looked at the stars, at the sky that would eventually amaze the child with the wonder that it displayed. She looked at the sky that would scare her child sometimes because thunder would be rumbling until it shattered the peace on earth and it all broke. The barrier stopping her tears and the weak shield around her heart shattered, leaving her alone against reality.

* * *

Bonnie understood that never would she share a conversation with her daughter, not a conversation punctuated not with kicks, but words and laughs. She would never have that. She would never explain to her why she should not fear the thunder. She felt her tears melt her skin as if they were a violent, acid rain. She cried because she worried about that child, she was sad because her child would never hear her voice. She thought about the day that angel might come to the realization that the woman who birthed her left her behind.

She needed to have a conversation with her future child because if she could not keep her, she wanted to give her something that could ease her future anguish and pain. She rushed to grab a piece of paper and a pen. Her hands were trembling. Around the paper, little wet dots were appearing because her tears poured on it. Her vision was blurry and she could barely see when she wrote the first words.

 _Dear Baby and future parents of Baby,_

 _I hope you are good people because Baby will probably be an amazing girl. If you are, then some of the weight I carry is lifted from my shoulder. If you ever tell her the truth, can you let my words reach her? It might never happen and I wish it never to happen because I don't want her to suffer the weight of my mistakes._

 _Baby, I assume you have a very pretty name that I will never hear, but I know it must suit you and reflect the angel you have become. I am confident that you will become an amazing human being. You are what is beautiful in me; oh, it seems you agree because you are kicking right now. I am stalling, I don't know what I can say but I think I will start by saying a bunch of sentences that will always be the proof that you mattered. Even though my mistakes and my wrongs are enormous, you mattered and have never been one of those._

 _Happy birthday …. Insert your age each time._

 _Merry Christmas, I hope Santa was generous._

 _Happy Easter and please don't overdose on chocolate._

 _Your costume is amazing; you will get lots of candies._

 _How was your first day of school? How was the first day of high school?_

 _You have a crush._

 _I am proud of you, graduating high school. Well done, and now I hope you enjoy college and maybe you will be a ballet dancer like me._

 _Baby, oil your hair, and don't miss your washday._

 _You made the right choice picking your husband… okay I think that is a bit advanced but I really can't remember the important things I wished I could share with you. Through every event I miss, I did not mention because I can't focus on a thought, just know that I, the young woman that carried you, love you. I LOVE YOU._

 _If it is hard to believe because I am not next to you, then I want you to know that great sacrifices often are mausoleum where love is buried. You are loved and you are a walking proof that I can love with all my heart. I am sorry for being weak and not understanding the right thing. However, keeping you with me will never be love. You deserve better, and I pray you get better. If at any time you stupidly think that I left because you were not worth loving, I want you to know that from your first heartbeat to your last heartbeat, I loved you. I am the one not worthy of your love._

 _I have no hope to hear your voice, I have no hope to see the woman you become, but I know you will be pretty; you're a beautiful soul. Don't let my cowardice and mistakes make you doubt that. However, if one day I cross your path or fate is merciful, I promise that I will be a better person and I will never let you down again. I will rise up to each of your expectations. I will never leave you behind. I will never make you question my love. I promise that if by the time that you are born I can be the mother you deserve, then I will keep you. If you're reading this, I guess I was still a child and you deserved better. However, this is to tell you that you, my child, were the most beautiful achievement of my life, you were my silent friend and please never doubt the truth. I LOVE YOU._

 _Your biological Mama_

The letter, with plenty other things attached to Bonnie's tragic past in Florence, was hidden in the box dedicated to Leila.

* * *

 _That letter is not mine to hear and it is even less Leila's to read. You made it; you became the mother that she deserves. As far as your promise goes, you are doing just fine_. Damon's words had turned into a balm and now they were softening the ache. She had stopped dancing and after a great crying session, she could finally smile in front of Leila without the crack on her mask appearing.

"Wow," Leila said as she sat on the floor of her sterile room. She leaned toward the glass; she was trying her best to get a better view of the video playing on Damon's phone.

"Mama," she said and Bonnie's heart stopped for a second, it moved quickly between dread and ecstasy. However, the ring on Damon's phone echoed louder in the room and Bonnie understood that Leila was referring to the caller: Rose.

"I will be right back ladies," Damon said as he reluctantly took away his phone.

Bonnie was, for a moment, out of the entire conversation. She was stuck at the previous event and for a moment, she felt shameful. She felt shameful because since she had started this adventure, she had never wanted the mother title. She never felt like she deserved it. However, it sounded right, it sounded so right. She could not stop the thought because, with humanity for a witness, she had been the little girl's mother for the past seven months. Another woman carried her title and until now, she had never been envious.

Her eyes started welling up; she felt the envious tears devour her sclera. She lost her breath and for a moment all honor was lost, she had forgotten Leila's presence. A single, lonely tear rolled down her cheek and she felt the torrent pushing against her eyelids. Her rescue came in the form of Leila knocking against the door. When she turned to look for the sound, Leila had her open palm against the wall, and she was expectantly waiting for Bonnie to place her hand against the other side.

The Bennett girl looked at the little palm hesitantly, now feeling regretful that she was blinded for a second. _The title does not matter; she is the only thing that matters. Really, she does love you_. She tried to quickly clean away the distressed tears, but suddenly they seemed to be replaced by relieved ones. Leila seemed to press her palm harder against the glass wall and each second Bonnie spent without placing her hand on top of hers scared the little princess.

 _The line I never dared adding:_ _'I know it is selfish but please don't hate me, I won't ask you to love me but please don't hate me.'_

She remembered thinking those words but she never found the strength to write them because at the time, she thought any hate to come from Leila's side would be deserved. She finally put her hand on top of Leila's.

The little girl still carried her worried expression, she felt as if something was wrong with her Bonbon and she tapped against the glass.

It was a ridiculous thought, but memory lane seemed to be fully opened. That little action of Leila reminded Bonnie of the time when she used to place her hands against her swollen belly while Leila's little hand pressed against her stomach.

"Sorry Bonbon," Leila finally said with a very apologetic look. Bonnie looked at her even more surprised. "Will be better soon and I will hug you when you cry I promise," the little girl added. She considered the glass wall a strong barrier against her ability to comfort her friend.

Bonnie placed her cheek against the wall and waited for Leila whom quickly placed a kiss against the wall.

"It is all better now, baby. You always make me happy," Bonnie said, finally letting the sudden overwhelming happiness take over the tears. "This does not stop our love and you gave me the healing kiss now I will be all fine," She completed her sentence while she pointed the glass. She punctuated her words with a bright smile.

"I love you Bonbon," Leila said meaningfully and blew a kiss. It was what the Salvatores called the healing ceremony: a kiss on a cheek, an 'I love you', and another blown kiss. Bonnie blew her kiss back and Leila expression became less agitated.

"I am sorry for scaring you, Baby, I am all fine now," Bonnie added as she settled back on the ground still facing her daughter. She could not stop calling her 'Baby' today and maybe it was because she started to make peace with a past that so long she chose to hide.

"Crying is not a thing to be sorry about," Leila repeated what Damon and Bonnie had been telling her the past days. The little girl had gotten more comfortable with her own tears, she was much more comfortable with showing her own pain in front of parents. She did her best not to cry, but when she did still cry, she did not apologize for it.

"Did I tell you that you are a smart little thing? You are absolutely right baby girl," Bonnie agreed with Leila and looked at the little girl as she laid on the ground and started staring at the roof of her glass room.

"Let look at the stars. It makes me happy when daddy and you are not with me. It will make you happy too." Leila was referring on the faux sky in her room.

Bonnie joined her in the contemplation and for a moment, she was silent. She pointed at some fake cloud and bathed in the sound of joyful laugh coming from Leila.

Few more days and you will able to hug her, she thought, hope finally regaining its rightful place. Leila's surgery was planned for the next morning, and tonight really felt like a night prior to a new birth, when some weight carried too long needed to be dropped along the sinuous path.

"Princess, I love you and nothing else matters, I want you to always know that. When I will leave this room, I want you to know that I love you and I promise I will never leave you, never again. I love you every second more and I promise to do that always." She felt the need to remake her promise. Damon was right; things were different. She was not leaving her daughter this time. When Leila would leave the theater tomorrow, she would still be there.

"I love you like one, two, three, and four…, like twenty the stars in the sky, Bonbon," Leila said as she dramatically attempted to count the fake stars but fortunately, she could only count to twenty. Therefore, she stopped when she ran out of numbers. In addition, she excluded the ones that were not twinkling.

"What about me?" Damon asked as he joined Bonnie's side on the ground and started gazing at the fake sky. Leila restarted counting the stars in the sky to answer Damon and Bonnie could not stop her laugh.

Damon quickly kissed her forehead and nudged her. He liked seeing her this happy.

"I love seeing you happy." He said while he leaned to kiss her and Leila made a disgusted sound then continued counting her stars.

"I hate seeing you sad. Awful conversation?" Bonnie asked as she could feel a bit of tension escaping from him.

"Lorenzo always gives me headache."

Bonnie raised her eyebrows. The name was slightly familiar to her but she quickly brushed it away. If she had to be worried about every Italian called Lorenzo, it would be ridiculous.

"Rose's husband, she used him as an excuse to end the conversation anyway…" He could not finish as Leila was shouting her love for him once she was done with her star count.

"I love you as much as seventeen stars in the sky." She said proudly and Bonnie gloated.

"Twenty stars when it was my turn" she said proudly and let her smile brighten the room.

It was so contagious that Damon smiled through his little frown. He kissed her again, covering her smile, and soon Leila made a sound of disgust again. It forced Damon to break apart from Bonnie.

"Principessa recount those stars, Bonbon can't be winning," He whined as he pulled Bonnie closer to him. Tonight might become the day they remembered as the beginning of brighter and happier days for their little family. The next morning their daughter was getting a proper chance at survival and childhood.

* * *

 ** _thank you for reading don't forget to show some love back. kisses until the next chapter._**


	18. Chapter 18

_**Thanks to everyone who followed, review and added to their fav. Here is a new chapter**_

 _ **Thanks to my amazing beta, Danielle/ isawyouasaperson**_

 _ **I disclaim everything**_

* * *

"They're beautiful and you did good bringing them into the family. Leila deserves this type of familial bond. I can't believe we might just be seeing the end of this hard situation," Stefan said as he passed a cup of coffee to Damon.

His older brother grabbed the cup and for a second Damon sniffed the strong, smooth aroma escaping the black liquid. Stefan looked one more time at the quiet scene unfolding in the room and he was happy that they did find a family along the way. He looked at his phone and read for Damon the message of support their parents sent, and he smiled. Leila was definitely the center of everyone's life.

Damon appreciated the warmth the paper cup conducted on the tip of his fingers; he felt the tension twisting his muscles leave. He rolled the cup in his hands and let his palms burn; he blew on the hot liquid and stared ahead. He faced the beautiful picture of three generations of Bennetts in front of him. Sheila and Bonnie were at Leila's bedside waiting for the little angel to awaken.

It had been a long day for everyone but everything went well; the surgery was faster than they all thought. Dr. Fell was confident that it was a successful first phase of treatment and just hoped that in the next three months Leila's body would not reject the graft or the situation evolve into graft versus host. Her confidence was enough assurance to have a bright glimmer of hope.

"She is the biggest risk that I have taken in my life and I did it twice with the same positive results. Every time she came through, she gave life to our daughter twice and never will I be ungrateful to her." He looked through the glasses and took a sip of his coffee. "Next time can I have a tumbler of bourbon? Baby brother, coffee is more a Bonnie and you thing," He complained and Stefan chuckled.

It was probably the first chuckle of the day, a sign that it was temporarily over and the storm had ended. It was a slight break but just enough for everyone to latch on deserved happiness. Damon looked at the petite woman he was lucky enough to call a girlfriend and the mother of his child, and he felt adoration. She was his rock and she was one of the people whom he called his everything. They made that beautiful and hopefully soon to be healthy little kid and now they would raise her together.

Right on time, she raised her head to face him and she looked exhausted. She surely was after giving her marrow a day prior, now she had spent the entire day worrying, and she did not eat. She smiled weakly at him and he felt the urge to go wrap her in his loving arm. He mumbled something to Stefan and gave him back the cup of coffee.

"I trust you to know Bonnie's favorite, she needs some," Damon said once he reached the door of Leila's room. Stefan obliged. He understood the need of privacy, and frankly, he wanted Bonnie and Damon to have their moment.

* * *

"She will be just fine. Bennett women are tough. I remember when Bonnie had that little accident as a kid. She will be just fine, my lil angel," Sheila said when Damon entered the room. The matriarch had tried to support her grandchild to the best of her ability. She knew that Bonnie would only take a break and a deserved breath of fresh air once her baby girl awoke.

"That's right, and she's a Salvatore too. Once you meet my mother or her cousin Sarah, you will say the same about that side of her family. She needs the rest, and she'll be just fine," Damon replied and let a small smile grace his Adonis features.

He held Sheila's hand for a second and walked towards Bonnie. She barely looked at him; her little princess had all her attention. She was holding Leila's small hand tightly. It had been four hours since Leila had left the operating room and Bonnie could only hold her hand. She held her hand when they led her to the operating room, she sang her to calm her nerve when in first second all Leila could think about was the needles. Now her baby needed to open her eyes so she could kiss her.

Damon's arms possessively wrapped around her and he lifted her from the sofa but she did not let go of Leila's precious hand. He sat down and sat her on top of his lap, kissing the crown of her head, then her shoulder. He whispered comforting words against her warm skin. She leaned so he could hold her down as he did through their entire journey.

Sheila knew from their behavior that it was the right time to excuse herself. She stood and dropped a tender kiss on Leila forehead, then did the same with Bonnie and Damon. She looked at the young Salvatore and some warmth washed over her. She had never felt confident on claiming that the day would come where she would not have to worry about her own baby girl Bonnie, but here it was. She had found her own family and they could take care of each other. These three were just what she prayed Bonnie would have in a future.

It came with a lot of sweat, tears, and blood. However, they were fighting to make it all better and Sheila was happy she could help with the healing and she was content; the little angel would pull through because her family needed her. That family only came together because of the loving aura around that little girl. She looked at the room and the beautiful family; those two had solid foundations. The way he was holding her, the beauty of Bonnie's vulnerability. A vulnerability that she only allowed him to see.

Sheila had been in that room the entire time and Bonnie barely talked or looked at her. She was silent because she was trying to hold the tears at bay, she had raised that child, and she was aware of her doubts, fears, and plenty of other somber things, but never her vulnerability. A gift that Bonnie never gave or a show a glimpse of to anyone before this Italian man. However, now under her eyes, layer of bravery, pride and need always to place everyone comfort above her stripped with a simple whisper against her shoulder.

It will be just fine; she found that one. That one whom crushes her fear of being human just plain human, she thought with conviction. A little smile spread over her face. She walked out, but for a moment, she preyed on a deep moment of privacy because it was hypnotic to see people who found someone who let him or her be human.

They are no babies anymore. They are now grown and responsible parents. The thought pleased her and she walked away

* * *

"She was an eight pound baby, that's an okay weight, but I was so afraid when my water broke. I was all alone and I called the emergency. I had read all these books about how things could go wrong if I did not push at the right time. So I was alone in the room you picked and my water broke," she started and she was still staring at her daughter. She squeezed her hand and tried to remember the foggy memories.

"She had a head full of hair and I thought it was weird. Stefan was born bald; don't let that hero hair fool you. He was my only experience with a baby, so I panicked and was worried when I picked her up from the maternity ward. I was holding her badly, but I was rushing for the pediatrician. A nurse scolded me. That was my first experience as her father." He shared his first instant with Leila, the first minute when he met his little principessa.

"You almost broke her neck but you were so happy. One of the reason I gave up and maybe the only good reason I did go through with abandoning her was you. Yes, definitely. You were so happy; I have never seen anyone smile like that." She remembered the stars Leila installed in Damon's eyes and she remembered feeling less worried because if she could not give her daughter the best, at least he seemed to love her.

He kissed the crown of her head and held her tighter than it should be possible, bending down and letting his head rest against her shoulder, right above the base of her heart. He listened to the peaceful rhythm.

"Sorry, I'm sorry." He felt guilty that he was one of the reason that made her give up on their daughter and the news surprised him. She took his hand and enlaced her fingers with his. She was now holding onto the people she called her world.

"Don't be. I would have done it anyway because for all it was worth I was in a bad relationship, I was a misinformed child, and I would have done more bad than good. You, Mister Salvatore, were a flicker of hope. You made it a bit better because at least she was getting a loving father." She turned to kiss him tenderly.

"She will be alright, tell me she will be alright. Make it better like you did six years ago. It took twenty minutes for the ambulance to pick me but at the end, she was healthy and beautiful, so beautiful. This used to be such a difficult memory but I don't know this time around you're here to see it happening and we won't be alone and I won't leave her. She will be just fine." She smiled and kissed Leila's hand.

* * *

They were silent for twenty minutes or more. They both stared at the sleeping frame until her little eyes flutter. Bonnie looked at her baby hopefully and the first words that came out of her mouth would have broken her heart any other day. The person she called for was miles away because she did not care to come today. She did not want her child to have disappointment being the first thing she felt.

"Mama" Leila said tentatively she was a bit out of it because of the analgesic and hypnotic remnant of the anesthetic drugs. "Mommy Princess," she insisted and Bonnie did not know how to react.

"Can you face time Rose? I don't care what your issues are; Leila is calling for her," she whisper-shouted at Damon. He looked at her as if she has grown two heads.

"She is calling for you. In Leila's world, you're the only princess. 'Mommy Princess' is you and you should know that," he pushed her toward their daughter. He was surprised that she was not aware that Leila had the habit of calling her doll Bonbon or mommy princess.

He could have told her that somehow, subconsciously Leila wanted to call her 'mommy', but she would never dare until Bonnie allowed it. For everyone that had known Leila her entire life, it was easy to comprehend. The only form of maternal love she received that was authentic came from Bonnie. It was the first time that she received the maternal love. She saw her brothers receive this type of love all her life but now, she was the one receiving it. Since it was coming from Bonnie, it was only normal that she draw some sort of conclusion. Now that she was not fully awake, her repressed desires were out.

"I'm here baby girl, just right here and I am not moving." Bonnie climbed in the empty spot of the bed and cradled her daughter for dear life. Some tears rolled from her eyes and she never understood how much she needed to hear her baby call her mommy. She forgot all the reasons that made her believe that she did not deserve to be called 'mom' by Leila.

I'm your mommy, she thought bemused and she only hugged her tightly. Damon kissed Leila forehead and rushed to go call Dr. Fell, leaving mother and daughter to their own bubble. Leila was saying some incoherent things and going on about unicorns. She called some for Damon but mostly, like many children, she called for her mother.

The Mommy Princess, her Mommy Princess. Her precious Bonbon.

* * *

An hour later, she was a bit more lucid and on a very Leila-style conversation about everything and nothing.

"Should she have so much energy?" Damon asked to Doctor Fell, who was checking vitals.

"Well people have different reaction to anesthesia. Everything seems all right and nothing abnormal. A nurse would come for the antibiotic and the immunosuppressant IV," she announced and checked her watch. "Also don't get her too tired until visitation time ends. She needs to sleep."

"Okay thank you doctor and now principessa tell me more about it," Damon asked facing Bonnie.

Leila smiled pointing toward the sky. She was talking about the shape of cloud that she was the only one to see. Her narcotics were still potent.

"You should call her just so she can know that Leila is okay," Bonnie whispered to Damon, who frowned.

He reluctantly pulled his phone out and started a Face Time session. He waited for a minute and really expected Rose not to answer, but she appeared with a little boy who was handsome. Bonnie tried to move out of the frame because she did not want to give the wrong impression. However, was it the wrong impression? She was laying by Leila's left and Damon was on their daughter's right, they looked like the perfect little family that they were becoming. Bonnie tried to leave just for a second so she could give them privacy.

"Mommy Princess, don't leave! This cloud looks like a dragon and this is you kissing daddy," Leila went on and clung on Bonnie's side.

Damon and Bonnie looked at each other embarrassed. Well, Bonnie was embarrassed. Damon did not care. However, Rose cared and, as it had been throughout Leila's entire life, the kid conveniently became her daughter.

"Mama is right here with you, Cara. I am so happy you are better," she said with a sweet acidic smile as she looked at Bonnie suspiciously. However, it was impossible to have a conversation with Leila because she was in and out of slumber. She was making no sense and oddly enough, it annoyed the beautiful brunette. She rearranged her son on her hip and refocused her curious attention on Bonnie.

"'Mommy Princess?' Hun, are you the organ donor," she said condescendingly and she had that vicious silent anger that most rich housewife mastered. The not so subtle passive aggressive attitude made Bonnie cringe.

"Bonnie Bennett, and you must be Rose. Leila's mother." Bonnie tried to stay polite and she even attempted to leave because she could envision what this could evolve into. She only hoped the woman could at least care about their daughter feeling better and keep the hostility at bay the same way she did.

Leila held Bonnie in place and nested her head against her chest. It seemed to be enough to set Rose ablaze.

Bonnie could admit the woman was beautiful, a classic beauty, but those faces always revealed every emotions for the lack of subtleties. Rose pressed her lips tightly and looked at Damon who knew her enough to foresee the scene that she would cause. He was tempted to hang up.

"Her only mother. You're the surrogate if I am right. Why are you still there? Did Damon decided that you will look good in his bed, like so many others?" she said, never letting her smile faltering. To say Rose was a bitter ex was an understatement. She hated Damon and she had a bad temper. She was one to be vicious and didn't care.

Bonnie blinked and tried to process everything. She would be doomed if any one talked to her in so disrespectful fashion. Damon wanted to intervene but Bonnie stopped him by raising her hand. She did not want any argument around her child. She carefully blocked Leila's ear and already the little girl was sleepy. She tried to ease her baby girl into sleep, which happened fast.

"All due respect, but you gave up your say in who is in Leila's life and Damon's bed when you walked out on them," Bonnie said, plastering the same smile Rose had and she saw the Italian woman become livid.

"Well it is always a pleasure Rose," Damon said sarcastically.

He hung up and looked at Bonnie apologetically. She just shrugged but he knew some of Rose's words did touched her. The insecurity about her place of mother was a matter of concern and she refused to address the idea of Leila knowing whom her mother was. They'd had some arguments about it.

"Can food be a decent apology; visitation hours are almost over." Damon tried to bring the warm ambiance back, but it seemed Rose had completely spoiled the mood. Bonnie simply nodded. Nothing could make this day bad.

Mommy Princess. She was on cloud nine.

* * *

He liked to look at her when her features were a pure canvas of joy. It was not often because of the circumstances that controlled their lives, but now it was unadulterated joy and her smile was beautiful. Damon fed on the soft curve that perfectly fit her beautiful features. He found himself unconsciously smiling and at that moment, he wanted to tell her that he loved her.

She finally raised her head. Her eyes met his, and her smile grew bigger that he thought possible. He was unfamiliar with this new twinkling mixed with warm green or it was the first time he saw the green orbs reflecting her smile. It was beautiful. This entire day was beautiful, and he was just a lucky man. It felt so abnormal. The last time he felt so lucky, his adorable daughter was born, courtesy of the same woman whom now made him feel the same.

"Thank you," he told her, not really thinking about a reason behind the need to say so but just feeling extremely grateful.

She arched an eyebrow interrogatively and she carefully put her burger back in her plate. The piercing blue of his eyes overwhelmed her and made her self-conscious. She bit her bottom lip. She felt ridiculous because for a moment she felt like a shy teenager. He often made her feel like a teenager that had the outrageous luck to have her crush reciprocating her feeling.

It is ridiculous he is just looking at you. I will never get use to this, she thought and she took a sip of her drink. She welcomed the distraction when the cold drink kissed her tongue and tingled her senses.

He did not stop staring at her, which was ataraxic for him. It was pure and effortless happiness. He drunk his bourbon and never stopped looking at her. She was cute with that creeping blush, and it was rewarding to know that for all her beauty, he could still get her to blush with a simple loving look.

"Damianio, can I just eat in peace?" she asked and made sure that he felt the slight touch of discomfort.

She was never comfortable under scrutiny nor when she received too much affection. She was getting used to it, but when it came all at once, she shied away or became suspicious. It was disheartening how some people could make you question the sincerity behind the love others could feel for you just because they misused your affection and took advantage of a gullible nature that was once yours.

However, this time the shyness came because she was aware of the veracity behind the feeling Damon's eyes conveyed. He had that sincerity in the way he addressed his feeling for her that offered her the assurance she wished that she did not need but she still demanded. She grabbed her burger, but he never ceased to look at her. She put it down and took in her physical appearance, which stood out in comparison with the venue.

She looked at the splendid crystal chandelier that ornate the restaurant's roof. She briefly took in the perfect dimmed light and the soft atmosphere. The waiters were dressed to the nines as much as the other patrons were and there was Bonnie Bennett and her sweats pant and black Henley. However, it did not matter. To Damon, she was just amazingly beautiful. She proved his point when she undid her bun and let the curls cascade wildly on her shoulder and some covered her face like a protective curtain. He waited for her to pass her hand in her hair to rearrange them and give him back the possibility to feast amorously on her beautiful face.

However, she never did and he knew that she would not brush it away. He smirked and she did not need to look at him to know that he was doing just that. It hit her right there that she had let go of some heavy baggage. She had let someone come and steal her heart. She had offered her trust to the point that she would agree to the stupid idea to go to a five stars restaurant in her very comfortable hospital outfit.

Damn I love him. When I am going to tell him. It came with clarity of a spring enlightened by a bright midday sun. She put her hand in front of her face partially covering her giddy smile.

* * *

There were a certain euphoria to the day; the atmosphere carried that fresh emotional wave of happy new beginnings.

"Bennett, that is ridiculous. I look ridiculous talking to a curtain of hair," he finally complained but only because she was obstructing that beautiful warm smile of hers.

"Talking? You didn't say a word for the past thirty minutes. Staring is more like it," she pouted but still moved her hair. He grinned at her teasingly as he savored his small victory against her stubborn-self. He picked a French fry and went back to his previous activity. He had that adoring look in his eyes, she relaxed, but still she did not attempt to resume her dinner.

"You should eat after you made all that long speech on how you could not wait for a greasy cheesy and meaty burger. You are so weird, Bonbon," He taunted her and she just rolled her eyes at him. He looked at the burger sitting on her plate and the flute of champagne next to it.

Who had champagne with a burger? Weirdo! he thought, but the weird things that he liked about her just reminded him that he had never grown so comfortable in a relationship.

He appreciated that he loved her without the weight of beauty standard that she easily met. It surprised him that he outgrew the vain side of him and it was so much profound that how she looked but more about which weird thing would make him smile. He wondered why everything made him love her more.

She shoved a fry in her mouth to keep away the snarky answers. It was heaven. She took another one, and she drank from her flute to prove a point.

He was the one to talk, with all the quirks that I find adorable. She sighed because she found it adorable that he liked bananas and peanut butter together.

She stopped when she noticed that he was staring at her again. "I can't eat while you are looking at me; it is so weird, like a serial killer fetish."

Damon arched his eyebrows. There was a thing both his daughter and Bonnie had in common; they both had weird interpretation of things.

"Talk about killing the romance." He said with a very mocking tone and once again, she rolled her eyes.

"Looking at me like I hung the moon is only cute when I'm not being a mess. Now it seems a bit exaggerated," she countered and waited for the corny answer to come because it is Damon.

"You do look amazing. I am trying to talk about a sensible thing and I want to take in the smile in case it becomes a heated argument," he said truthfully and he looked at her with expectation. She tensed a bit and she tied back her hair. He understood that she was not relaxed anymore. Therefore, he rushed to amend.

"We have been there before and obviously I don't support your reasons. I won't push and you will do it when the time is right but…" she cut him and became as defensive as the other days.

"I just want her to make a conscious choice when she decides to accept me as a mother. She is six and fragile because of the whole mess with Rose. I don't want to take advantage of that. Now, she won't understand what it meant, what I did when I was sixteen. If once she is forgiving and understands what she agrees to forgive then I will gladly accept any choice she makes," she reiterated the words; the opinion she had shared when he already pushed the subject.

"It won't take long before she finds out. A mirror will be enough," he said stubbornly and she gave him that pained expression. He felt the need to apologize because he knew that she was just biding her time and he could never take that away from her.

However, he wanted to protect her from vicious attacks similar to the one Rose made today. For Damon, Bonnie was Leila's only mother and to have the person that never properly assumed the role shun her because she did not receive the recognition was heartbreaking. He could do something and would do something.

"I am sorry and I don't want this to be an upsetting matter. I will respect anything you want but I want you to know that for me you're Leila's mother and will always be. Technically, on paper, Leila only has one parent because fortunately Rose never adopted Leila. I want you to regain your right legally. We had a talk with Stefan and Sheila told me how it scared you that I could just take her away from you. So here, I want to share the right and have you mentioned as her mother…" he stopped when he noticed that she was becoming a sobbing mess and he moved to be closer to her.

She kissed him so lovingly that she devoured the air out of his lung. His heart just got a steady biting and he kissed her more passionately. He let his tongue control the exchange until they broke apart panting.

"I guess that is a greenlight."

She smiled so brightly at him that he kissed her another time just hoping that he could feed on her love and warmth. Since the incident that happened in the hospital with Rose, he felt the need just to reassure her also he really wanted her to get over her last fear and tell Leila the truth.


	19. Chapter 19

_**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, followed or added to their favorite. This is a new chapter and I hope you will like it.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything**_

 _ **Thank you to my amazing beta Danielle or isawyouasaperson , this was the longest chapter so it was a lot of work**_

* * *

 _March 2011 session 1_

 _The office was cold with neutral tones. She worriedly looked around, and took in the different degrees hanging on the wall. It was intimidating. The walls screamed modesty and impersonal, due to their off white color. Right in the middle of the room there was a huge couch in beige color._

 _The entire room was an accurate cliché to myth of a therapist office. She looked around and carefully sat as she heard the door open. She was still hesitant about her decision. She had never turned to a therapist before so she was afraid. She passed her warm hand against her quivering arm, seeking some warmth, and sat straighter. He smiled to her and all she could offer was a tentative to response._

 _"Hello, I'm Doctor David Stein, but you can just referred to me by my title or anything that you're comfortable with," he said as he sat opposite her. He still had a very caring smile that slightly eased Bonnie's discomfort. She stopped twitching her finger and smoothed her pants._

 _"Doctor Stein will be perfect." She spoke at a volume that he barely could hear, but her stress was hard to control. She picked a little thread poking from the couch and refocused her attention. She did not want to be there, but she needed to be there._

 _"How do you want me to call you; Miss Bennett or Bonnie?" he asked and crossed his leg waiting patiently for her answer. How she liked to be addressed would help him understand her. He carefully wrote something on his notepad._

 _"Bonnie, I always find the use of my surname an archaic matter," she confessed and slowly sunk in the extremely soft couch. Doctor Stein just softly hummed to show that he was listening, but she did not continue._

 _"That is surprising. Often people of your age find comfort in family, and prefer to let strangers refer to them by their surname. How do you feel in your familial environment?" he picked up the little detail and the connotation. He looked at her and put his pen aside to aspire a bit more comfort. No one wanted to speak when another person observes them or records them like lab rat._

 _"Family? Mine is scattered around the world. I have not spoken to my mom in years. I talked to my father not so long ago, and I have my grandmother. However, that is far from a familial environment," Bonnie tentatively tried to explain and she sunk more in that couch._

 _"Do you live with her, you grandmother?" he inquired, still in that very soft and caring voice. Bonnie rearranged herself in the couch and sat closer to the edge, she slightly bent forward to answer whilst her hands were still twisting._

 _"No I don't, I don't anymore, but I used to," she answered quickly and closed herself once again._

 _"Why did you stop living with her? Any trouble?" he presses and she shakes her head to answer the last question. Trouble was not the reason she was living in a mediocre apartment with her boyfriend. It was guilt but she did not say anything._

 _"I don't know why I stopped living with her." It was a safe lie, but she avoided his eyes. She looked around, stared at some furniture, but her gaze was forever shifting._

 _"But if you had to instinctively answer, what would you say?" he carefully pressed but she hesitated for an instant._

 _"I don't have to lie if I am not around her. I am not in the right place with her at this instant," she answered and picked another of the loose threads on the couch._

 _"Does it hurt to lie to her? Do you wish for a more truthful relationship?"_

 _"I miss her, so it hurts because I have to avoid her. We are close but it is no longer as jovial as it used to be. I feel as if I broke us at some point and I can no longer make it better."_

 _"Do you feel isolated?"_

 _She looked at him with a blank expression and she pushed further into the couch. there was no more thread to pick, so she scratched the tweed like material. She was more hesitant with every second. This was going deep for a first meeting but from all she could elaborate on, this was the easiest subject._

 _"I do, I'm isolated," she answered and she stared at the desk behind him._

 _"Do you wish for it to be different?" he questioned, but she shook her head as an answer. He calmly waited for a verbal answer._

 _"No, because I don't deserve a different situation. I created it, I deserve it." Her words sounded like an absolute truth in her mind. She sat straight and for the first time she was really looking at him._

 _"Does it hurt? Do you want it to stop hurting?" he continued his interrogation._

 _"Yes, it does, but I deserve every bit of it." There was so much conviction in that statement that he expected tears but she was apathetic, as if she was only stating a well-known fact. That was worrisome._

 _"No one deserves to suffer Bonnie."_

 _She did not believe him. She looked at the clock, praying for the end._

* * *

It could be fixed, she did not need to panic. She could fix this, and all she needed to do was to take a deep breath. Sheila picked the clothes from the floor and swore she was raising a teen all over again. However, during her teen years, Bonnie was gone from home. She picked more clothes that were slowly leading to the bathroom. She sighed when she noticed the pool of clothes discarded right in front of the door, between her dance tutu and the outfit she tried on. It was a mess that Sheila would not clean. She dropped the clothes that she picked up right back on the floor.

"Bonnie Sheila Bennett, goddamn it child!" she shouted, annoyed. Bonnie burst out of the bathroom quickly, she knew better than to piss her grams. There were few times when Sheila Bennett cursed at anything or anyone and every time she did, Bonnie had to go through a form of torture. She braced herself for the worst and stood there helpless in her robe. She looked at her grams and Sheila was already side eyeing her.

"Gram, I'm sorry" she quickly started to pile the clothes on top of her arm. The faster she did it, the safer she would be. Sheila simply rolled her eyes and took a seat on her granddaughter's bed.

"My only consolation is that your own baby will make you go through the struggle you make me go through," She said with a smile and looked at Bonnie cleaning. Things never really changed if she had to school an adult about tidiness. She was being over the top, but Sheila Bennett was always over the top.

"Grams looking at me won't help. You're just stressing me out," Bonnie complained and she received another eye roll.

"I stress who I want in my house, but that is not why I am here," she said and extended a letter to her grandmother. Bonnie just looked at the sender and sighed. She put it on a cupboard near her and continued with her chore. She did not want to engage more in some matter.

"Well baby, you will have to talk about it because I am not moving from this room until we do." Sheila showed how comfortable she was on Bonnie's bed after picking up the envelope from the cupboard. She quickly read the basic information and passed it back to Bonnie so she could open it. The petite woman reluctantly took it but she kept it close.

"I already know what it is about…" She left the end hanging and continued folding her clothes. She hoped it would be enough for Sheila to drop the subject but she knew her grandmother better than that.

"I know too and that is why I think we need a talk," Sheila finally said softly. There was no need to antagonize Bonnie. However, she promised herself that never again she would make herself a complicit in that bad habit of martyrdom that her granddaughter seemed to bask in so easily. She took the letter herself and opened it. "Read and explain it to me?"

Bonnie slowly opened the brown envelope. She pulled a pile of paper out and started to read aloud the letter sent by Juilliard. The time she had asked for a leave was slowly ending and she still had no idea what to do. It was almost the beginning of a new year and she could enroll or decide to give up. She looked at her grams; she had so much to take care of right now, right here.

That resigned look, Sheila knew it so well, and she could not let it slide this time she decided. She tapped on the bed so Bonnie could join her; she knew that she was one of the reasons troubling her granddaughter.

* * *

"Grams I don't want to talk about it," Bonnie said through her irritation and her tone rose. A look from Sheila told her she knew better. "Sorry grams, but I still don't want to talk about it."

"That's not a problem; you can still listen, even as stubborn as you are," Sheila countered confidently and Bonnie had no choice but to sit at her designated spot. She sat and turned to face her grandmother, frown never leaving her pretty face.

"For as long as I have known you, so all your life, it was always how one day you would be on a stage dancing. When your mama left, all you had was dance and a dad that would come occasionally. When you came back in ruin from Italy and I did not know, all you had was dance. Before I got sick, dance was everything and you came back bitter when you had to take care of me. That is all fine, I would be bitter too if I had to put my dream in suspension for an old woman. Dancing is everything to you, as all ways been." Sheila looked at her tenderly and Bonnie let her head lay on her grams' shoulder.

She said nothing and just analyzed every word. The situation was completely different; they were a lot more going on that a year ago. She came back to her hometown, hoping that she would only stay for a few months; the time her grandmother needed to recover and receive the adequate surgery. However, now she had a daughter and her grandmother was still in need of medical assistance. She could not wrap those things up in two months.

"I still have too much left, and Leila is most important," she answered and continued "then you still have to receive a surgery, I can't just go and leave everything else behind. I don't need much to understand what I need to do."

Her voice dripped with regrets that Sheila could not miss. The weight of duty and responsibility was audible. Sheila offered her a supportive smile. Sometimes, Bonnie really lacked common sense, and she needed to put it back in her grandchild's mind.

"None of the reasons you gave are good reasons to stop. I am scheduled for surgery in two months and I have done fairly well without you pushing pills down my throat while Leila needed you. Leila will be out of the hospital next week, she certainly won't need a bitter mom in five, ten years when you will be regretting the career that you could have had. I am saying, right now, you don't and can't stay for me. If I have to kick you out of this house, I will. Now I am not one to be quiet when I see you acting a fool. Kids can be raised in any city and Damon should be able to understand if you explain. So, I am the reason, and I am telling you to get a grip of your life" She finished and stood from the bed walking away from the room.

"Grams you have been there for me and I just don't want to let you down. I have so much guilt already because of the lie and now I can't just go because it is going well for me," Bonnie tried to explain while Sheila was almost crossing the door. The wiser woman only shook her head, how her granddaughter thought never ceased to shock her. She came back to sit on the bed.

"We already talked about this, children make mistakes. Am I happy that you kept me in the dark? No, but do I expect you to beat yourself up for being a scared child? Again, no. We had our hard times but we are better. Chile, you don't owe me anything. Live your life happily, you were doing pretty good until your foolish good heart confuse you. Be selfish for once, no one will resent you and for your information, I never resented you for anything. I will love you as I did yesterday if you go or don't go but I won't forgive myself if I am in the way of your dreams. You have a child now, so you understand such feelings." She kissed Bonnie forehead and cleaned a lonely tear away.

"Grams, I love you," she answered softly and her grams just smiled after putting the envelope back in her hand.

* * *

 _June 2012, Session 33_

 _"It's all sort of complicated. We don't talk and I have lost confidence in our intimacy. He is not as supportive as I need him to be. How he can so easily ask me to forget about giving birth? I am afraid to talk to him; it is so painful, and hard to live around him. I am seriously thinking about just leaving and starting over alone," she confessed and she waited for the smart way her therapist would draw more truth from her. She felt more comfortable after the fifth meeting and now she could pour her heart out._

 _"So why are you still with him? We have made enough progress and we talk about how you need to be happy. You need to learn selfishness," he added the small input he often did. He looked at her and she sat straight._

 _"I'm afraid of what he will do if I leave. Also, I have no real plan. If I just leave then what do I do? Yes, I know it is a relationship mostly based on sex, but there is still some love." She sounded ashamed and Doctor Stein could easily notice it._

 _Bonnie was such a complicated patient, always eager to punish herself or to blame every situation on her actions. It could become sources of frustration. However, in the past year they worked together, she made some progress. She had opened up about her surrogacy, but her boyfriend was a sensible subject._

 _"Having sexual relations should not be the glue holding you together. You need an emotional connection. Some love isn't nearly enough. You could always come up with a plan. What happened to dancing?"_

 _"That is just a dream and really, I'm not that talented, he is right about that," she answered and he was not surprised that her boyfriend discouraged her._

 _As a therapist, telling her what to do with her life was not in his purview; he was merely supposed to help her come to those conclusions. However, her boyfriend often sabotaged all the work she did in therapy. Doctor Stein did his best to remain objective._

 _"Well, a dream is still better than nothing, and a professional opinion and your own should be the only things you should seek when it comes to how talented you are," he countered and she simply nodded._

 _The next week, she sent her application for Juilliard and discovered that she had enough talent._

* * *

She was pacing endlessly, her heels scratching on his French acacia parquet and at this point, Damon did not know if he needed to be worried about his parquet or the talk they might have. He looked at her while going through the plausible alibies; he tried to refocus his mind on the fact that he was truthfully innocent. She was making him dizzy. He needed to tell her about his conversation with Leila, which added to his anxiety, but right now was not the moment. He took a seat because while standing, he was in her way. She made a swift turn then stopped.

"Okay, I am all ears." Damon laid on his couch and peeped from where he was. She needed to be stopped or she would go through the typical Bonnie Bennett stages of anguish that Damon knew so well.

Number one pacing, number two silences for hours, and number three she will act as if she is fine. He had been around her too much and he could let her go through it and then push for answers, or push for answers right now and avoid stress for everyone.

"I'm okay," she grumbled and continued walking back and forth.

He sighed and walk out of the couch to grab a glass of bourbon.

"You shouldn't, or not before we get over this." She grabbed the drink from his hand to put it on the table, and walked up to the couch. He followed her and he had that worried expression.

"Should we talk before? We definitely need to talk," she asked genuinely and Damon was disoriented. He looked at her and wondered what was going on, so he just raised an eyebrow.

"Okay Bonbon, can we form coherent sentences here please," he said softly then he stared at her suspiciously. _Is it about the surprise Stefan kept teasing him about?_ He shook his head remembering the specifics of what his brother had promised. He grabbed her, he settled her on his lap, and lifted her head so he could look into her eyes. It always made the bad news easier to digest, and if she was shaking like this, then it was definitely bad.

"So what do we need to talk about?" he asked with a teasing tone and she blushed like a schoolgirl. She had never felt so shy; she passed her hand in her hair trying to get over that uncertain awkwardness. She was slightly agitated because she had planned it the entire week but now she felt like backpedaling.

 _What happens if I don't please him? What happens if he got over the attraction because we waited so long?_ She had so many internal questions. The truth was that at some point she was worried that the sensual link between them was dead before it could even grow. However, right now she was ready. She mentally felt able to trust him at that level, but was it too late from his side? They had been quite busy with the preparations for Leila's return, so they had not work on themselves as a couple, they were not distant, but they were busy. When she finally felt ready, she did know how to bring it on the table when the focus was still Leila.

She drew a deep breath; she looked at her attire and wondered what she was doing. That the conversation with grams had made her lose focus. Why did she think a pair of wide leg pants was a good idea, given that it really framed beautiful her small waist because it was high.

 _Okay Bonnie you need to calm down. The goal is to get naked, if he wants to see you in that after state after this awful outfit. What happened to the sexy dress? He is so mature, experienced and now I will be rejected_. Her mind was just full of such rambling thoughts. She was making herself anxious with every second that passed.

"Obviously I had to look so ugly. What am I even doing?" she mumbled aloud. She was so anxious, and she forgot that she was still in his company. The self-depreciation was going strong and it would take few seconds more. She felt that she was about to break down, she wanted this to be so perfect and now she was ruining it.

He looked at her. For him, she was beautiful and today she had apparently made an extra effort. Which he would have stated if she had only left him the time to say anything. He had never seen her with silk straight her. It framed her face beautifully and she was wearing that laced long-sleeved crop top, her toned abdomen only showing a bit. He needed time to understand what was going on. There was something going on with Bonnie; she was not quick to panic or anxiety, but right now she was almost neurotic.

"Now, I can't really get over the idea that something is out of place. If you could just calm down, babe. You look amazing, actually you look too good for a night in," he stopped to kiss her and then slowly released her lips, "You're beautiful and tell me what this all about because I'm started to itch for a drink." He smirked and waited for her answer.

"I need to go," she blurted and he looked at her completely lost. Lost that was how he felt this entire time. She took a deep breath, her cowardice had won, and she was trying to cover her tracks but how would she cover everything inside his room? _Oh, no I have to clean it out and make it look as if nothing happened_. Once again, she was panicking. Sex seemed to matter so much now, and it used to be so easy before. Now that she really wanted it, she could not handle the pressure.

"Where?" he asked with his expression getting more serious, his hand still on her hips drawing little circles. "Where do you have to go?" he asked again after she stayed silent for almost a minute.

She was trying to think. Her brain was so fuzzy and she couldn't properly align her thoughts. She stood and grabbed her bag. It was not the right moment, and she had to accept it. She pulled the paper out and dropped it in his hands. They would be speaking and everything would come when she was not so anxious to make it happen.

* * *

"Oh," was all Damon could say when he read the official letter. He stood, walked toward the table where she had left his drink, and grabbed his bourbon glass. He drank his alcohol and he continued nonchalantly.

Bonnie frowned she expected more of a reaction not just an onomatopoeia. She finally stood from the couch. She was frustrated, but she still had a room to clean.

 _He definitely lost interest in me_ , she thought pessimistically and she started walking toward Damon's room. Maybe I should start thinking about a break up. She was going back to New York, and that was an irrevocable decision. That point of her life was evolving but she started to think that her relationship with Damon was stagnating. Now that everything was going well with Leila, she had more time to think about her relationship, and a lot of thing made her anxious.

She wanted so much more right now. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, and more than anything she wanted to show him. She had planned everything and maybe the lack of spontaneity killed it before she even started, or perhaps her fear of rejection. She walked quickly trying to avoid the need to argue and speak her frustration.

"Do you want to live with us or take your own apartment? How are we doing this? Is it easy to get an apartment over there?" He swirled the drink in his tumbler and looked at the dark golden liquid.

He took his time saying something; he did not want to rush her or assume she wanted him there. However, he knew her well enough to know that this reaction stemmed from her anger and frustration. He was afraid of moving too fast with her and somehow he had moved too slowly. He was aware of it but became too scared to break out of their routine. He could not ask her to live with him without his heart pounding. However, he did it the best he could due to her surprising him.

"Wait, that's your reaction? We don't have to talk about it or come to a compromise. What about your life, Leila's one and everything else?"

He cut her blabbering with a tender kiss and he pulled her back in the room. She could never stop thinking about everyone else and he was not spending the night arguing about a decision as easy as this one.

"Stefan has to go back now that everything is fine; my father won't let his absence slide, or mine. However, I'm a lawyer and can be called in for serious cases only. I can deal with clients online. If my presence is indispensable, I can take flights. Leila has no friends around here and she will go anywhere you do. It's as simple as that and it's only a year, then we can really talk about where we want to live. So do you want a separate apartment?" he repeated his question after explaining himself.

Bonnie shook her head and she was flabbergasted, she was still standing in the middle of the living room trying to process his words.

Damon kissed the crown of her head. "That was an easy talk, no need to be so stressed. Now I just need to contact my real estate agent," he said to her as he was leaving the room. It only hit her a minute later that he was climbing the stairs to his room. Her feet could not be faster and she could not take more than two steps at once. She wished she could fly over there.

"Damon, Damon wait," she shouted while she did her best to run faster, but she ended up slamming against his back. He was backtracking from the open door and she hit him at full speed, and only luck preserved her from breaking anything. This night would never end. She shook her head whilst she tried to stand up from the ground. He turned to help her and already Bonnie was avoiding his eyes.

"Now I am supposed to take back everything I said about your lack of romantic sentiments," Damon said matter of fact when he finally helped her up. She said nothing and even if her blush could barely be seen, she felt as if shame, shyness, and anxiety had stripped her.

"That's the real cause of your anxiety." He pointed at the room then he walked in with her slowly following behind.

* * *

His very masculine and minimalist room had easily been turned into a love nest. It was classy and sophisticated; nothing in the excess, except possibly the touch of night blue Persian silk, but Damon hated Chinese silk. She had invaded his space without making the invasion oppressive.

He took in the dimed light and the dark sensual decors. She had picked black roses and he could only appreciate the amount of effort. She had made sure not to cover the ground with petals and she did not use scented candles. The room was beautiful but what stood out for Damon was the effort she made to remember that he disliked those things.

He gently pulled her closer to him until her toes were almost stepping on his. His hands circled her waist and tightly pressed her against him until all she could do was to raise her head so she could look at him. He tilted his head so his love filled blue irises could express his gratitude for the effort. He found her biting her lower lip nervously but her green eyes were adoringly observing him. He kissed her, pulling her lip from between her teeth.

He had kissed her hundreds, thousands of times and it always felt beautiful, shattering. However, this time she could put no words on the strength of emotions it conducted. Her body and soul melted in his arms and, in way, it transported her somewhere else. He pulled her in a field of his emotion where she was all his, at the center of his love. If in her panic, she was looking for signs of his love hours ago, his actions told her mind the answer.

It was a slow, passionate, but not pressing kiss. He barely tickled her senses, only teased at the surface of her desire. She wanted this man, she was not doing it under pressure, and maybe that was why she had been so embarrassed. She finally regained control over her flaccid arms as if he infused flames of passion through her entire being. Her hand slipped through his styled hair and she did quick work messing it. She stood on her toes to strengthen their kissed and all these hours of practicing never appeared to be more valuable.

"Before it goes any further, I don't want you to feel pressure; that's surely why you're anxious." He stopped and tried to retrieve some of their lost reason. He could barely hide the devouring desire that had darkened the shade of blue of his eyes.

 _Am I stupid? All the hours, days, months that I've wanted this and I am trying to discourage her. Love makes you an irrational idiot_ , he thought as soon as the words left his mouth but as he curiously thought of it, this would be meaningless if she did it as a duty.

"I was willing a month ago but we have a child, that leaves us no real time. If I had a doubt, it is all gone. I was anxious, but mostly I thought you will reject me," she comfortably told him. This effortless honesty was something she had never thought would be part of a relationship. The honesty, the communication skills they had was the glue of their relationship, that was how she felt it and it made the idea of physical intimacy something unthreatening for her scarred-self. "So do you want it?" she returned the question to him, eager to get his consent.

"I might be reckless but I am not insane. I love you too much to ever reject your advances and I want to have sex with you." He had that little smirk tugging his lips and he pulled her to resume their kiss.

* * *

He was slower in his ministration that she expected, all about tenderness with focused passion. He was a great tease when all she wanted from him was more; she wanted more lips, more hands, more caresses and more of him. He gave it all to her his lips never release her plums one. Sucking, nibbling, and passionately kissing her, she returned each of his kiss in a bruising manner. She moaned and with all the ways of her ablaze body, she exacted more of him. He was so in control that it was infuriating for her because she was all driven by the desire to combust in passion.

He hooked his slender finger in her silk her and let them swim in that mahogany sea. He tilted her head for a better access, towering on her small frame. After his attempt to break the beautiful barrier of her soft lips, she finally obliged, granting access to his invading tongue. His kisses, strengthened by passion, fueled by months of great restraint, ignited a fire in Bonnie's body that rushed through every single muscle and nerve. She was a moaning mess, and he could mold her being easily.

She slowly retook control, her tongue jousting at its own pace, directing the inflamed tango. She pushed him toward the bed, losing her last ounce of control and succumbing to great ardor.

He fell on his back and chuckled. She stood there, intoxicated by his image; his messy hair, face deformed by an unadulterated smile, and his beauty. Not in a handsome way that man usually are, but simply beautiful. She could not stop her own smile and the little carefree laugh that he swallowed the next second with another shattering kiss.

Damon pulled Bonnie on top of him and arranged her hips so she could straddle him. His hands drew patterns on her clothes covered thighs, he pulled her down for a kiss and unleashed all his love in it. She moaned when his tongue snaked out to lick her lips and reenter her mouth. He quickly reversed her them and his body covered her; he made quick work of her lace shirt and was graced by a bare chest. He whistled his appreciation and took a hand full of her perky breast. She arched her back at the contact of his cold finger against her heated skin. His mouth left hers to suck on her slender neck; he descended from there to her nipples, where the wetness of his tongue felt perfect.

Bonnie pulled on his hair. She needed to remove his shirt with such urgency that she pulled at the button. She was incapable of working her fingers. He was still suck on her nipple whilst one of his hand found its way to her pants and slid in. She whimpers and bit his shoulder when he started massaging her clitoris. She had always been a loud lover and now his name was slowly becoming a mantra. She licked the mark left by her teeth and he groaned. She lifted his face, so she could kiss him; she wanted to control the lovemaking. The night was her show.

He lifted her again so she could be on top once.

He looked at her in only her pants; she was ethereal at that instant. Hair messed by his finger, face flushed by passion, dark green consumed by desire and looking upon on him as if she was a deity he was meant to worship. He let his hands rest on her hips, she was beautiful, and he said it.

She burst into genuine laughter because she did believe his words and she tenderly kissed him. She undid his belt whilst she never broke their kiss. She was feeling confident enough for bold moves. She bit his lower lip a few time, slightly pulling until she completely released it. She started kissed his well-defined jaw and drew her path of hot kisses to his groin.

She undid his zipper with her teeth and he looked at her as she took his breath away. She ground against his hard penis and he cursed.

"Dio santo (my god)," he said when her small hand slid into his boxers to grab his painfully hard phallus. She smiled and he could not resist the urge to pull her in for a kiss. She continued massaging his penis and he was cursing whilst he kissed her.

"Ti piace (do you like it)," she asked and he looked at her with a mixed of emotion. She never spoke Italian before except when she sang. She did not wait for his answer and was already freeing his member from his boxers. She bent and licked the tip.

"Ah cazzo… bella si (fuck… babe… yes)," he groaned and took a deep breath. She slowly put his penis in her mouth. She started going up and down until he could not grow harder. She undid her pants and his hands moved from her hips to her inner thighs. He spread her leg wide-open while she was still on top of him and he coated his finger with her juice. He licked his finger and hummed. He needed to stop her blowjob or they would not finish what they started. He carefully reversed their positions so she was below him.

He removed her panties and slid a finger in her wet core. She bit her lower lips but she could not control her moan. He smiled appreciating the shift in power. He added another finger and her walls contracted. His thumbs started rubbing her excited bundles of nerve, and in matter of second, she felt the orgasm build. He started pumping harder and she could no longer hold it. She came all over his fingers and he made a show of licking his digits. He let her catch his breath and held her tight to pull her center infinitely close of his groin

She tried to remain calm because it was a sizable monster. He checked how wet she was and let his tip graze against her lower labia. She groaned, she begged for more, but he continued teasing her until she could no longer take it. He pushed the tip in and already her walls were latching on him.

"Cazzo." She was excessively tight, warm, and wet. He first strokes were small until she adjusted around his size. He started to slam in her and from that, instant, Bonnie alternated between his name, moans, and total loss of words. His thrusts gradually quickened, until he drove her to the edge and she came for the second time. He continued thrusting until it fell out of rhythm and he followed her orgasm with one of his own.

He helped her roll back on top, so his exhausted body would not squash her, and all she could do was laugh. He looked at her, taking no offense because the sound she was making was pure happiness. He kissed the crowed of her head and she nestled her head against his chest. "I can't believe I missed this seven years ago," she joked and he lifted her chin just to kiss her another time.

"I love you," she finally had the guts to say and she smiled when he kissed her repeatedly.

"I know babe, I know," he cockily answered and she tapped on his chest and he laughed, he liked taunting her. "Ti amo anch'io," he kissed her and slowly started his way down her body. He still needed to balance the scale.

* * *

When Stefan had mentioned a surprise, Damon expected just about anything. His eyes swung between Bonnie and the reason why he was profusely sweating. He straightened and pulled out his most charming smile, this was not the moment to panic. Leila jumped out of his arms and for a second, the surprise his brother planned was not so displeasing. He took a deep breath; he could survive this mess and come clean.

 _Right after you had sex. She is axing me without a second thought. I am going to lose her so fast._ His thought were slowly plunging him in horror. He took a deep breath and tried to hold back the panic building. Right now except the little surprise on her face, Bonnie did not seem bothered. He looked ahead of him and Leila was still carelessly running toward his surprise. He almost shouted that she stop running out of habit, but he needed to get used to the fact that right now Leila was rarely as tired as she used to be. Bonnie had the same problem because she took off after their daughter.

"Nonna… Nonna." Leila was happily hugging a woman in her mid-forties or early fifties. From what Bonnie could understand now after that Leila called her Nonna, it was her grandmother. She stopped her little sprint and looked at the unfolding moment. She looked at her little girl happily wiggling in the arms of the woman that had her in a tight hug. Bonnie had that slight moment when her instinct kicked in and she wanted to ask Leila's grandmother to be careful. It was not stemming from any malicious or envious place, but because she had the impression that the little girl was still fragile.

"I missed you, Principessa," Lily Salvatore said as she put her granddaughter down and kissed her on the cheek. "You're all grown up darling." She bent to give another kiss and carefully looked at her beautiful little princess. The Salvatore matriarch had missed her little companion. It could get lonely when her sons and husband were busing themselves in family business, and Lily had often been left babysitting the little girl.

"Where is Nonno? Nonno?" Leila tried to bypass Lily as she looked for her grandfather Giuseppe. Being the only grandchild in the Salvatore family, the girl was easily the favorite and she was everything in the eyes of the Salvatore patriarch. The man was known to be quite strict, but around Leila, he was such a softy. She turned to walk behind Lily's knees, still looking for her grandfather. "Nonna, where is Nonno?" she said with a frown and she started pouting.

Damon more than anyone waited in suspense for the answer on the tip of Lily's tongue. He looked at his mother hopeful, his heart was tight, and it was beating at a saccade rhythm. He swallowed his saliva. He waited for his mother's answer and he was seeing himself losing everything. He was trying to think about apologies, excuses.

 _Lying will be stupid, she knows me too well. She will spot the lie_. He swallowed hard again, his thoughts were not helpful, and all they did was to kill any sort of confidence. This was the worst timing for everything, he looked at Stefan murderously, and he just knew that tonight he would speak his mind. He was always so quick to blame everyone when things took an unplanned turn; he was getting better at it, but right now he was in panic and he needed to channel his emotion. He looked at Stefan and there were so much concealed anger, he turned his look to Bonnie and it was enough to make his stomach do pirouette.

"I'm not enough?" Lily gently teased Leila and the little girl tried to pull a smile, always unwilling to hurt anyone's feeling. She softly placed her hand in her grandmother's and started to pull her before she got the answer to her question, it did not matter anymore but Damon's entire life or at least next move hung on that answer. He could not stop looking at his mother from his isolated spot.

"Nonno will be here soon, he just needs to finish some work back home." Lily lifted up the little girl one more time. "Happy now Principessa?" She kissed all over the little girl face until all Leila could do was giddily laugh. She put her down and started looking for her other son but already Leila was pulling her toward someone else. "Slowly darling, slowly," the Salvatore woman chastised but Leila was impatient. She dragged Lily toward Bonnie, impatient that her grandmother could finally meet her real life princess.

"Nonna, this is mom…" she stopped herself and she anxiously looked at Damon. She took a slight time to refocus, embarrassed that she could no longer hide behind her drugs while she called Bonnie mommy. She did not think it was a bad thing; _Bonbon is just like a mommy. She is also a princess_. Leila quickly brushed the thought away. Her mom Rose had been clear about this point, so clear that the little girl had broken into tears once she was done with her lesson. She could only call Bonnie Bonbon because she was not her mother.

 _But I want her to be my mommy too_ , she had thought for the past month and she had done her best not to say while she was being scold. Ironically, Rose's attempt had sparked Leila unknown rebellious spirit. She had never planned to continue calling Bonnie mommy princess because she was not that courageous yet and she did not want the rejection if Bonnie corrected her. However the clever little thing resorted to stratagem, every time, she will take pills she would call Bonnie as she wanted to do so, that was until Damon caught her. She was feigning the state so she could do so with less guilt.

They had a conversation and he had promised that he would keep her little secret but only if she had the guts to ask permission from Bonnie to call her mommy, so she could do it without going through the trick. He reassured her about everything Rose said and he was proud that for once she decided to act selfishly; she acted like a child for once. He was not one to encourage rebellious behavior but that one was clearly an exception.

This type of situation was the reason why Damon wanted Bonnie to come forward, but she was so stubborn, and her need of accountability troubled her so much that she missed the hurt caused to Leila. At this point, he was done with the woman; he needed to push Rose out his daughter's life. However, until Bonnie could fully accept that she was the only mom that Leila needed, Damon could do nothing of the sort.

He took a deep breath and came forward, still throwing those angry look at Stefan but he had time to tell the truth.

* * *

She could not ask now, not after what her and her dad planned. Leila tried to correct herself. She took a shy breath and moved uncomfortably. Bonnie smiled at her and the little girl returned the smile brightly, and she continued to talk once again comfortable. "This is princess Bonbon, my best friend," Leila said full of excitation and slightly pushed her mother toward her grandmother. She looked at Lily quietly waiting for her reaction.

Lily said nothing for a second; she looked at the woman in front of her who was trying to school her expression. Bonnie wanted Leila to continue calling her mommy, after almost a month she was accustomed to it, but she still smiled. What did she really expect? She helped Leila to stand in place; they all need to understand this new ball of energy. However, Leila was jumping everywhere happy finally to be free; she kept on running between Damon and Bonnie. She would whisper something to Damon and comeback to stand by Bonnie

Lily quickly noticed how Bonnie did her best to manage her emotions in front of Leila, already something not matching with what Rose told her in her last call. For the Salvatore matriarch, Bonnie Bennett did not look like a woman to argue with anyone in front of Leila, as Rose had told her in their hour-long conversation. That hour-long conversation had been about Leila, but right now, she was aware that Bonnie was also in some sort of a relationship with her son. She was more than a marrow donor. It would not be easy to get rid of her if need be, and she prayed it would not turn in another Rose case.

However, she needed to be careful; if there was any truth in that conversation then she was standing in front of someone as vicious as Rose herself was. Everything led Lily Salvatore to hate Bonnie, but she was smart enough to choose to draw her own conclusion. Lily sucked in some air and she put on the façade of the charming housewife. She politely smiled and leaned in to kiss the petite woman on the cheek.

Yes, she could be judgmental against a woman whom could put value on a child, but the same woman was here playing the role intended for her from the beginning, and judging by the way Leila was so tightly attached to her, she was doing it right.

Bonnie bent to put some order in Leila mane, which was much more hair that she had a month ago. Only few week ago it occurred to Bonnie that the chemotherapy must have caused some thinning. For the second she was focused on Leila, she ignored the entirety of the room.

"Hey, here baby girl, can you see better now?" Leila simply nodded and Bonnie pressed a very tender kiss on her forehead. She had missed touching her so much after all that time in the clean room.

Lily was still taking notes. She threw a look at Damon who was finally by her side, and he hugged her.

"Lily Salvatore, Stefan and Damon's mama," she said through her polite smile and pointed at her two sons flanking her. Bonnie shook the hand that she extended and she gave Damon a slightly worried look, but he mouthed at her not to worry.

"Bonnie Bennett, Leila's Bonbon," she answered. She bent to help Leila who was still jumping around her leg, "Now, what have I said about jumping and running in hospital corridors?" she asked with a very soft tone.

Lily just looked as she took notes and analyzed the mother and child relationship.

"Not to do it because it is slippery and you don't want me to get hurt," Leila pouted and had her guilty face on. It took less than a minute before Bonnie was already melting. That little pout was her weakness.

Damon just rolled his eyes; he smirked and whispered something in his mother ear, "Watch it unfold, she always gives in, and here it is," as if on cue, Bonnie was cuddling Leila and at that moment Lily could hardly keep the smile away from her face.

"Sorry, she is a little bit a hand full right now," Bonnie apologized and rejoined the conversation while Damon picked up the giggling girl.

"She must be hard work then, I remember when those two were kids," Lily supplied a bit into the conversation; she was open to interact with the woman. All she heard from her sons was praise; however, she always needed to have her own opinion.

"I should be thankful for this, Leila running everywhere and finally having the energy to do what she wants. I just have to get use to more work. On the worst days, well Damianio can be the strict parent. Sorry, Damon," she corrected herself and politely smiled. Lily did the same and they walked in comfortable silence, until the Salvatore matriarch started talking to her children. Bonnie helped Leila and she was sharing jokes with her little girl.

Distracted, she bumped into a shoulder. She would have never expected to meet someone from a past she wanted nothing to do with. She had not seen anyone from that family in years. The hospital was the last place she expected to see any Mikealson.

A face covered by her blonde hair Freya Mikealson could barely see in front of her and Bonnie was doing her best not to let go of her daughter hands, which made it difficult for her to focus on the path where she was walking. The two women slammed against each other and Leila almost fell due to the impact.

"Are you okay, Princess?" Bonnie quickly turned to face Leila and the little girl was on the ground. "Did you hurt yourself" her voice raising with a bit of panic. Leila shook her head to confirm that she was not hurt. "Baby you okay, nothing is painful right?" she asked again. It was an exaggerated reaction, but it was just Leila's first day out.

"I'm all fine, Mommy Princess," Leila let slip out and it was in front of the wrong crowd. At least Bonnie felt as if a Mikealson was a wrong crowd. She took a deep breath preparing herself to face someone who used to be a constant in her life.

"I am sorry ma'am is your daughter okay?" Freya said and Bonnie felt happy that she had not recognized her yet. She could brush it off and continue.

"She is fine, nothing happened, right?" she answered and tried to confirm with Leila. Speaking was a mistake, it sold her out.

"Bonnie , Bonnie Bennett" Freya Mikealson asked out of surprise, she had not seen the Bennett girl in almost five years, when Bonnie was still dating her brother. She looks at the little girl and wondered if they were related. He would not do that, he was a mess at the time but he would not.

"Principessa, so Nonna wants to go for gelato and Uncle Stefano wants to go for cake. What do you want? You can pick one and only one, and looking at Bonbon won't help." Damon walked back and picked up Leila as the little girl was trying to use Bonnie's weakness, well aware she had no chance to obtain both with Damon.

That was all that was needed to confirm Freya's suspicions of the girl's paternity.

Damon kissed Bonnie. "And what do you want, Bonbon? And please don't give me a new option," he continued and Bonnie had that slightly concerned expression.

"Damon, this is Freya Mikealson. Freya, this Damon and Leila Salvatore." Bonnie tried politely to introduce everyone, but she knew her business would be all over Mystic Falls the next day, maybe even earlier. "It was nice seeing you, but we have to go for gelato or this little one over here will make fuss," she quickly cut the interaction short and smiled as she waved goodbye leaving a flabbergasted Freya behind.

"That was rude of you," Damon noticed but Bonnie did not even reply. Her thoughts were far away. Her ex would try to contact her. She took a deep breath and put a smile on her lips. He could not be that bad.

* * *

 _August 2012, Session 55_

 _"I kicked him out, I finally did and I feel lighter." She quickly sat excited on that couch_

 _"And what finally made you decide that you needed to let go of him"_

 _"He talked about her, no one has the right to talk about her, and it was just too much. He had to leave my life."_

* * *

 ** _now which mikealson is that hateful ex. i hope it came as a surprise. kisses until the next time_**


	20. Chapter 20

_**Thanks to everyone that reviews, follows and add to their favorite. That really helps getting those chapters out. Therefore, I hope to get reviews for this chapter. However the next update might take time because back to school but cross finger to end the story before January.**_

 _ **I disclaim everything.**_

 _ **Thank to my amazing beta Danielle aka Isawyouasaperson who did her best to edit everything even though she is busy too. Check her stories, they are very good take on Bamon.**_

* * *

July 2012

She looked at her ceiling as if she could find answer on what to do with her life; there was nothing but never ending white. Was she happy? No, she was sure of that fact but she refused to face reality. Her sadness had no comfort and she felt as if it was fitting. Living with her boyfriend was one of the top five of her worst mistakes but she had done worse, she was righting the balance. However, she chose this as an alternative punishment. Her therapist said that she should not punish herself but at night, the last cries of her child that she heard haunted her.

She rolled on her side and she tried to prevent the building tears. Thinking about Baby often did this. She wondered what her name was now. Today was a hard day. She had been born today, and Bonnie was extremely melancholic. Nothing to celebrate and all that was left behind was the pain of forced separation. She picked up her phone and she called her grams. Sheila was the only person that could often uplift her mood the past months, but she did not know what she wanted to say to her recently. Since she moved in with her boyfriend, Sheila started to be judgmental, and her grams was hurt that she made such a reckless move.

The Bennett matriarch thought the Mikealson boy was mentally abusive. She even sometimes suspected physical abuse and she was not completely wrong. Last year, Bonnie would have argued the contrary, but she had a life changing year. She knew it for fact now that the young man was abusive, and she unfortunately submitted herself to such violence. He never physically hurt her but the mental damages were incommensurable. She hesitantly pressed the button to send the call and she crossed her fingers that Sheila would not be in a foul mood.

"Grams?" she asked softly and with heavy breathing, she prepared herself for a lecture. Recently, all her conversation with Sheila ended that way. She was conflictual and Bonnie might try to provoke such a reaction. Nothing seemed to match the feeling of extreme pain she felt this day last year, no words seemed to inflict such pain as Baby's cry did. Her aggressive behavior with her grandmother just a call for help that was constantly missed. She searched for the hurt to fill a void, since comfort could not make the pain she felt go.

"Hi, chile, is that you?" Sheila asked surprise but happy that Bonnie finally called. "How are you doing? You've been a ghost since you moved in with that boy," she started and already Bonnie was wincing. It was a bad idea, she knew it, and that was why she called. Was she really looking for comfort or was she searching for more heartbreak? She never knew at heart what she wanted from those interactions with her grandmother.

"Grams please, can we not do that? Can we not find anything else to talk about?" she tried to put the incentive and she used the words that would set her grandmother temper. She wanted the hurt today more than anything and she needed her mind taken away from her daughter's big first birthday. A fight it was then, she wanted hurtful words and anger.

"Okay chile, let's leave this for another time when you feel better. What is wrong today?" Sheila had easily caught on Bonnie's tone.

Her voice was full of sadness and she could hardly miss such emotion when she raised that child. She had been aware that something was wrong with her granddaughter, she could only find one culprit, and she really tried her best to help Bonnie out of her toxic relationship. She tried so much that it ended up creating some distance between them. Every word seemed to lead to an argument, every call seemed to steer hatred, and they grew further and further apart.

* * *

She had nightmares thinking about that boy putting his hands on her granddaughter, she had nightmares about that boy being abusive in any form. She tried stopping it but the ardent opposition was Bonnie. She could no longer do anything, Bonnie was nineteen years old, and she couldn't force an adult to do anything. She could only try to force some sense on that stubborn and loyal mind. Therefore, she advised, she tried to convince, but her granddaughter seemed set into staying in that hell.

"Nothing is wrong. I am doing fine but it hurts that you will think that I only call when something is wrong." The young Bennett attempted to hide her feelings, but she was also disappointed that her grams let the issue go so easily. She drew some air and she attempted to keep most of her tears away. She felt herself drowning slowly until she saw no light of the day. It was similar to waiting for a prophesized end of the world peacefully.

"You worry me when you believe that I don't know when you are sad or worse when you are constantly in pain. If you called me, it's because you need my help and don't waste our time by trying to lie child. What is wrong and if you can't be specific just say it generally." The old Bennett was never the one to beat around the bush. She could come across as harsh, but Bonnie hardly reacted to softness. People often needed to prey on her emotion. She needed to be dragged out of her slumber and martyrdom.

"Sorry, grams, it's a rough day and I just don't know how to make it better. I have no idea what to do with my future, nor do I really care. I am lost and I have been for months. If you have a solution for any of my trouble I will be happy to take it," she whispered and her fingers tightly grabbed the phone. She wiped the first tears falling and she huddled up on her bed. The pain would never go away, even if she cried until it pours out through every pore of her shattered soul.

"Let's consider it this way; for as long as I have known you, the future was Juilliard and you have given too long to fear. You need to fill an application right now. So take a seat and do that, I will be by your side when you do it right now," the woman insisted. For the first time, with the pressure of Sheila picked a paper, and she did what her therapist had also advised. She filled out the application and put it in an envelope.

"Now that you're done, why don't you make that day better by leaving that awful apart of your and post your letter of application. A day can't get worse when you leave some of the lethargy behind. For the other part that you keep secret for me, I have no idea how to help but if that bastard is the reason, then baby, you need to leave. Don't answer that but take some clothes and come for the day to visit your old grams, please," she calmly stated everything and quietly waited for Bonnie's answer. This was all she could do to help a reluctant soul.

"Okay let me just get this application out, I need to do something else, and then I will visit." She gave in without a fight. Even going through the turmoil, she was still a child that sometime needed to feel like it. She needed her family home.

"I will cook your favorite plate and please don't bring him here. I don't want to destroy the mood," Sheila hissed her warning and Bonnie nodded. Even if she wanted, he was rarely around. He came and left as he wished whilst he lost it when she did the same.

* * *

Her grams said she could find a way to make the day better, so she attempted to do it. The fact that her daughter was turning one consumed all her thoughts. She could no longer think about anything else and she needed to make a decision. She would give into such thoughts one more day, just a day and she would forever erase that period in Italy. She pulled out the small cupcake that she paid and she took out the single candle. It was painful, it was hard to go through the pain, and she still felt the need to do something meaningful in honor of her daughter's life.

He found her like that in the living room. He was slightly high; he was always intoxicated with some sort of substances. He was aware that she became tired of life with him, so he did his best to drag her down and keep her isolated. He took a deep breath and he kissed her cheek leaving behind his filthy smell on her skin. Nothing was different; it never drew a reaction from her when he touched her in whatever state he came home. She tried to slip out of his arm and she grabbed that little cupcake.

"What is that?" he asked in an irritated tone as he pointed at Bonnie's hand that was covering the candle's flame.

His family allowance was taking time to come, he was broke, and he was running low on drugs. He was worse company in such times, she tried to walk away, but he held her back by her arm. She winced at the pain and tried to escape his grip.

"Nothing that concerns you," she snarled and pushed her way to the balcony. However, he followed her and he started shouting.

She carefully put that cupcake on the table and she did her best not to waste her day. She wanted to spend a memorable day or simply to do something meaningful. She promised herself that it would be the last day that she would remember Florence and Baby. She wanted nothing to ruin her daughter first birthday but he was there to ruin the moment, the same way he ruined her first day as a mother.

"Now, I don't care what you think you have going on, but you're still all on your own without me. You have no one who cares about you, except me, and I would think that you would know how to speak to me," he spat, he expecting her to shrink under the weight of his words. However, she had worked on this in therapy. She understood that her grams cared about her and she was not alone, she just chose to be and to feel like it.

"I will not give you the satisfaction of arguing with you. I am not a fool or anything remotely close to it. Yes you might think I am because I let you drag me along on all your stupid mistakes but I no longer feel as if I have to please you. I no longer fear that you might leave if I don't agree with everything you say and maybe I just feel as if you have stopped being the center of my life. So I don't have to share any of your burden anymore. I just want this day to happen without your destructive touch," she answered without raising her voice, but her words had never been more cutting to him. She moved him out of her way but her words had too much impact on him. He could not resist the need to be vindictive.

"I should have known that your sensitive self would never get over Florence, a year…." He stopped to laugh because finally he was getting it. He looked at the cupcake and the single candle. "You definitely never understood it; she was not your daughter. She will never know you. You should be over it and done doing shit like this," he spat angrily.

She surprisingly did her best to ignore him. There were no tears, to his dismay. She had grown stronger. Her daughter was slowly becoming a distant memory, but this was her goodbye to that page of her life. He had no right to interfere in this part of her life when he was the man behind every second of chaos. He hated when she acted higher than she was, he hated when she ignored him, and he hated when his words could no longer hurt her.

What was left of the power he had on her? She had ceased to love him, and he was not blind to the truth. He did not understand why she was still with him but he was sure the fear of abandonment kept her rooted. He grabbed that little chocolate cupcake where a buildup of wax surrounded the white cream. The candle seriously melted during their argument and without a second thought, he threw it out the building.

"Here you go stupid bitch, as gone as your child," he said, getting closer to her.

Her right hook collided with his cheek, there was a heavy silence in the room, he was trying to recover from the pain, and then there was the obscenity she had held in her mind for almost a year. She shouted her rage at him, her frustration, and disappointment. She took a deep breath once her lungs started to burn from the lack of oxygen. There was surprise in his part, he had never seen her furious, and he had never feared what she could do until today. He had bullied her for years and she never stood for herself until he threw a stupid cupcake.

"Utter another word against that child and I will gladly cut your tongue," she threatened him with her eyes burning with anger. "I am done with your shit, I am done with anything linked to you, and you're going to leave this house," she shouted at him whilst she pushed him toward the exit.

"Bonnie…" She slapped him before he could try to use his bitter tongue to fix anything. She stopped pushing him out of the house. She grabbed the little backpack she filled with clothes and she walked toward the door to leave for her grandmother house.

She turned to hiss a last warning.

"I will spend the entire week at my grams house, and when I am back I want you gone. This is not any other day and I know where you hide your shit. If I find you when I get back, I am calling the cops on you and so you have a week to leave this house. Never even talk about my daughter, asshole." She walked out of that apartment and she did not look back. She needed to do something meaningful for her daughter what could be better than breaking up with the man that was behind their separation.

"Happy birthday Baby." She whispered and she tightly grabbed her backpack. She could attempt to forget now that nothing or no one could remind her of that hard time. This was her parting gift to the memory of her child. She needed to leave that luggage behind simply to survive. It was the last day she considered herself a mother, from that moment she liked to think about it as a mistake worth twenty thousand euro. Something broke that day; something else replaced it for the sake of survival.

* * *

Present days

"Do you want me to take her?" Damon asked Bonnie while Leila slept against her shoulder.

She had been carrying the little girl for the past hour but she had missed her daughter so much that it barely bothered her. Her arm was slightly numb and her hip was hurting, but nothing she could not survive. She shook her head and just smiled too him. She needed the time with her daughter.

"Are they always like this?" Lily asked Damon softly. She tried to do it innocently, as Bonnie walked slightly further from them.

She really had many questions concerning the young girl and the time they spent together helped clear some misconceptions. Before, she had assumed that Bonnie was careless around Leila but now she was proved wrong. The woman spent hours focused on every need her daughter could have and she only took a break when Damon stepped in to do the same. She was so careful with the little girl that Lily had to tell her gently to take some time for herself.

"Glued to each other? Pretty much a two in one combo. Leila has hard time letting go of her and Bonnie is a bit of a mama bear. You will get used to it. It reminds me of how you used to be with Stefano," he said with a smile forming on his lips.

Lily could hardly miss such happiness. She could easily let go of her prejudice if it was for Leila's and, apparently, for Damon's sake.

"And you have no troubles with it. You were never the kind to share. You had a hard time letting Rose be her mother, but someone who has been here less than a year get to have such a big part in her life. Do you have an idea what might come out of it?" she said, sounding more and more intrusive.

However, it barely disturbed Damon; he could easily find answers to her question. He understood her worries, he was rarely a good judge of character, but could she really say something when she married his father and still believed that he was a man that only dipped in clean business. He understood that his mother had a long conversation with Rose. He stopped and she did the same, they both observed Bonnie and Stefan talking.

"I think anything I could say to explain my reasons to let her in, Bonnie can easily show you. You can't judge her because at seventeen she gave her child away." Damon looked at Lily and she was obviously surprised.

Bonnie physically looked like a teen or she barely entered her twenties. It was easy to blame her youth on her genes, she seemed to have an outstanding maturity, and people were left obvious to her age.

"Yes, she was seventeen when Leila was born. She blames herself enough for that part of her life and I won't let you add any fuel in that fire," Damon stated with sincerity, which was enough for Lily to accept that she should never use the past as an argument.

"I will never blame a teen for her mistakes, and obviously, my concern here is that you might let your pants make the decisions. Leila is your daughter, she is your girlfriend."

Damon frowned, but she dismissed her son with a raised finger. If they needed to come to a resolution then he would listen to her concern.

"I have your ex-wife crying about how you kept her away from her daughter for the sake of your girlfriend. I found Leila calling a stranger mama, so excuse me if I mind business that is not my own. Damianio, I just need to know that this would not hurt you or Leila." She looked at her son, and in motherly manner, passed a hand through his hair to relieve some of the anger she was seeing. If he had this conversation with her, then he would not have it with his father. She also attempted to avoid putting him in the position where Giuseppe would remind him of his mistakes with Rose.

* * *

"I asked Rose to come with us a year ago but she had to take care of her sons, then when holiday came I asked for her to come once again, and she found another reason. Bonnie convinced me to invite her weeks before the surgery but one of her sons had a flu. A fucking flu when the daughter I kept her from was getting a new marrow," he spat and he could feel his veins flood with anger.

 _That bitch can be vindictive, she can lie, and I should have known. Keeping her from her daughter, the hell._ He could barely rationalized his thoughts.

Obviously, anyone aware of the unity in the Salvatore family would try to destroy Damon's relationship by pitting Damon's family against Bonnie. The Salvatore were a tight clan, it was hard to deal with parents that forgot that their children's lives weren't something they could control. However, they loved their children and their children returned the love. It was one of the reasons Damon knew that Giuseppe would fix his problems getting on the surrogacy list.

"Rose was never a mother to Leila. My child is struggling with that trauma, and she is so attached to Bonnie because she acts like the mother Leila deserves. I should have kept Rose away and I will surely do it now. Bonnie never asked for the love Leila is giving her. However, she deserves every bit of it. Have you ever seen Leila so happy? And she is known to be a happy kid. Bonnie is a stranger to you, but to Leila that is the only mother she ever had. We know what we are doing as her parents and I knew what I was doing when I chose to be her man." He finished in a tone that left no space for counterproductive arguments.

He looked at his mother just to see if she understood but she had a proud expression on her face. He could not understand what was going on in her mind. She smiled and kissed his cheek. It only took thirty-two years for her son to stop hiding behind her skirt. He never told her to deal with his decisions before today. It was unexpected, but he was supporting his good decision. She could still remember when Damon pleaded with her so they could both convince Giuseppe not to cut him off financially when he was plagued with the ludicrous idea that Rose was the woman for him.

"I knew your dad would be a good husband when he told his mama that she had no other choice than to accept me. He could always stand up for himself when it came to his father, but he had that adoration for his mama that made him believe her words were gospel. You are weirdly very similar and I believe that she must be that woman who doesn't force you to be different if you have the balls to tell me politely to mind my business. Definitely, she must be a good mother if you and Stefan think so. This time you don't have to run away if you plan to marry her. I like her and you father might too," Lily said and Bonnie was walking back toward them.

"Stefan finally found that coffee shop and I don't want the noise to wake her up." She passed Leila to Damon then stopped in her tracks to face him. She had that concerned expression, and she came slightly closer to him, her eyes rested on Lily for a second. Her mind was full of questions that she was not sure would be welcome. She took a deep breath and caressed Damon. "Do you want a treat to make you feel better and later we can talk about what's wrong?" She whispered the last part for him because she did not want any kind of misunderstanding.

He nodded and he was sure that she would find him coffee with bourbon. She smiled and he drew her in for a kiss.

That was unexpected for her. Lily's presence made her feel awkward, but she let him draw some strength from her.

"Better," he smiled to her and she almost blushed too her last toe. She looked at Lily with an apologetic expression but the Salvatore matriarch brushed it away.

"Bonnie, can I go with you in the coffee shop? Stefan gets his taste from me while Damon gets his love of bourbon from his father," Lily said politely and Bonnie responded affirmatively with the same polite tone. Slow steps were the way to start a good relationship.

 _If Damianio is so in love with this young woman, the best I can do is to know her,_ Lily thought to herself, willing to try. She already thought the Bennett girl was excessively pretty and charming. She followed and started the conversation hoping that they could click on some points.

"You're a ballet dancer, Leila must always force you to dance. We always used to take her to shows, Giuseppe and I. Have you seen her dance?" Lily asked.

"She is my practice partner and I hope you can join her next week to see her progress," Bonnie answered with a more relaxed tone. She never had hard time filling the role of the proud mom, and it could easily be heard in her voice.

"He was right about it; you're good at this mother thing. If you were wondering, that was what was wrong. I doubted how good of a mom you were. Now because I am as good as you are, you must understand how we mama bears function. The last one cheated on him with one of his best friends, but you seem to be good for him," the brunette woman said with extreme sincerity, and because she had Damon and Leila's eyes, her words had more impact on Bonnie that they should have.

"I will keep all of that in mind."

* * *

"I want to say it now." Leila said confidently to Damon and he looked back at the living room where Bonnie and Stefan were engaged in one of their strange conversations. Lily was busy arranging all the gifts she brought for her granddaughter and Sheila was doing her best to store what food was left from Leila's welcome party.

"Do you want to do it with everyone around you or just the two of you?" he inquired and silently waited for his daughter to decide. They had spent few days preparing everything for this to be perfect and now that he was looking at Leila, his little girl seemed nervous.

"She will never say no to you, you can just ask and it would be all over," he comforted while she bit her nails.

"Can you stay with me, but just the three of us?" She pleaded with her adorable pouty face. She dreaded to ask on her own but she also had the feeling that the moment only belonged to Damon, Bonnie and her. _She can't say no even if she isn't my real mama, she could be my second mama_.

"Okay, Principessa, just the three of us. You should go, and wait for me in my room." Damon kissed her forehead and watched as she ran upstairs. He loved how now she could run and she was not tired before she made it to her destination. He went back to the living room to try to snatch Bonnie away from Stefan. They always talked for too long and he never understood how they could share so long.

"Antibiotic time and you know how hard it is to convince her to take them." Damon told a semi-lie. It was time for Leila to take her antibiotic, and in her state it was extremely important to maintain her in an healthy state until the marrow fully recover. However, those pills had no side effects or they had very few ones, which was why Leila had no problem taking them. In addition, Bonnie made sure to explain to her how it was important that she took them. It would be unfortunate if all of their efforts were lost because they misused her antibiotics.

Bonnie looked at him suspiciously but still she followed him.

The Bennett girl found Leila sitting in the center of the bed with a gigantic gift by her side and she hardly knew what to think. She turned to look at Damon for a clue of what was going on. He shrugged, and he gave the pair some space.

Damon was smiling because he wanted something that reminded Bonnie of her own memory box.

The little girl tapped on the spot next to her to invite Bonnie to sit. Bonnie took the seat and she curiously observed the box. She could actually pack Leila in that box, that was how big it was.

"That is a gigantic box, is it a gift from your daddy?" Bonnie asked without taking her eyes off Damon. He smirked because he knew what she was thinking. He could not wait for her to see what was inside the box. He had put enough thought in it and had worked hard on this box with Leila.

 _I made him promise to let me have the biggest gif_ t, Bonnie thought, a bit disappointed. They all became competitive when it came time to choose presents for Leila. She also bribed Sheila and Stefan so they would not pick better present.

"No it's for you Bonbon," Leila struggled to push it toward Bonnie. She anxiously bit her lip, and it was enough for the Bennett girl to form an idea in her head.

"Okay what if I give you your pills and then you can tell me what I did to deserve this beautiful, all pink gift, Baby." She smiled and she picked the different pills. However, Damon grabbed the medicine boxes and he took them away from her.

"Already did that, but Leila needs to show you her surprise." He kissed her cheek and he helped their daughter to stand on his bed. He sat by her side and held her hand. Bonnie was slightly worried but mostly she was excited to see what was in her present. First, there was a small pink paper that Leila handed to her and she still refused to look her straight in her eyes. Bonnie grabbed it and it was a small paragraph handwritten. She assumed that Damon wrote it.

 _Dear princess Bonbon,_

 _Daddy said I should know how to sell myself to convince you. Like the advert on the TV, so first I wrote this._

 _I am free, you don't have to pay, and everyone loves free things, you told me last time._

 _I know how to dance and we can train together like the other girls do with their mamas._

 _We are both tiny but I will grow up soon, so it won't be the same. I hope it is okay._

 _I love you a lot and you love me too._

 _I will stop running in hospital corridors so you can stop to be worried._

 _I really love you , I love you more than daddy (ps I am writing this but I don't believe it) and I hug you better._

 _I am your best friend and you always say I am cute._

 _I hope it is enough to sell myself and you will accept what I have to ask you but just in case, I have a gift to convince you. Papa just explained to me how to bribe you._

Bonnie read the last line and she was laughing at every line. These were definitely words from her amazing daughter, with a little help of her father. She grabbed the letter and she could not wipe the smile from her face. She looked Leila, who was less worried, and Damon, who was still holding the little girl's hand. Bonnie slightly frowned at Damon from teaching her pure daughter what a bribe was.

* * *

"Now darling that was the best advert ever, I love you too. However, what are you selling?" She asked, more and more intrigued.

"Open the box, there are steps to this." Damon supplied some help because the question froze Leila. Bonnie stood up and carefully undid the beautiful bow. "We did not save everything but most of the important ones are here." He supplied when the first thing she pulled was a picture of Leila and Bonnie sticking their colorful tongues out. Leila's was green and Bonnie's was yellow. That was a picture taken during their first day to the neighborhood park.

It was a first time box of every first time Bonnie and Leila did something together. There were multiple hairbands.

"She kept that chignon until her hair literally fell out of it and as you can see some are broken. She just loves you that much." Damon told her about the little broken black hairbands that she used months ago in that hospital room.

The next thing was a cd of the Italian song she sang in the car to keep her asleep.

"I made sure to have enough pictures. I will probably take another one." He put a gigantic album of picture in her hand. That was her first album and from there she could hardly hold back her tears. Those first time gifts seemed endless, from the dollhouse to ballerina shoes they used the first time they danced. The bed was filled with everything that represented their mother and daughter relationship. She had never felt so love, and she had to hug Leila for dear life. This little girl was forever the ultimate love of her life.

"Don't cry … Bonbon, please don't cry." She sounded worried and Bonnie had to giggle between the happy tears. Her child had too much heart. She wiped her tears, but it was impossible to hold her happiness inside her. This was the most thoughtful present anyone had ever offered her.

"These are happy tears; no one ever offered me something so beautiful." She kissed Leila and sat the little girl on her lap. She passed her hand through the mane of curls, which were becoming more uncontrollable each day. She kissed the crown of her head. "However, I didn't do much to deserve this, Baby, and I can see you want to tell me something." She tried to help with the little girl's stress.

Leila looked at Damon, panicked, but he smiled at her in very encouraging fashion. She drew a deep breath and she took that lip of faith

"You promise me that you won't say no?"

Bonnie only nodded, she never said no to those angel features.

"canicallyoumommy?" Leila pronounced all at once, making it hard for Bonnie to understand. She mumbled her words and barely looked at Bonnie.

"Leila, baby you can tell her," Damon said softly to his child. She finally looked at Bonnie in the eyes with her special puppy eyes.

"Bonbon, can I call you mommy?" Her heart was beating frantically and she had closed her eyes while she wished for a yes. Please let her say yes, please let her say yes and I will eat less gelato. I won't run in the corridor please let her say yes, she started wishing hard.

Bonnie was crying by the time the last word left Leila's mouth. It took Damon's voice to bring her back to her senses.

"You need to say something before she hurts herself from closing her eyes and fists so tight," Damon said with an adorable smirk. He pulled his phone out because he needed to record this one too. By her expression, nothing could stop the yes coming out of Bonnie's mouth.

"Princess, I would be honored if you called me mommy." She kissed her daughter on the crown of her head.

"Papa, mommy said yes," Leila said, her voiced filled with excitement and she left Bonnie's arms to go pick another more formal envelope then she came running back.

"Papa said I should give this to you when you say yes." She dropped the paper and ran by Damon's side.

"Mommy said yes," she repeated the word. She was really feeling free now that she was finally allowed to say it.

"I told you she can never say no to you." He winked at her and the little girl could hardly hold back her laugh.

"It's official, babe." He looked at Bonnie, who was holding Leila's new birth certificate and other legal papers where she was mentioned as Leila's mother. She took Leila from Damon's arm and just hugged her baby. They both laid on Damon's bed laughing at nothing and it was just pure happiness. Bonnie's phone rang and she asked Damon to answer it.

* * *

"Hello, Bonnie's phone, but she is quite busy. I'm Damon Salvatore but you can leave a message for her," he said and there was silence on the other side.

"I never thought her so forgiving, or she does she just have no idea of who you are?" the other voice answered and it was enough to alarm Damon. Who was it? Why was he speaking so freely, as if he had external knowledge of his life?

"Who are you?" Damon asked, quite worried but his voice was steady. He was good when it came to bluffing; a family trait.

"Kol Mikealson, her ex and the man to whom you owe your daughter. We met once, but I doubt you remember," he said with a calculating tone. He knew Bonnie; if she was messing with a Salvatore, then she had no idea what was going on. It was a surprise when his sister told him about her hospital encounter. Now the shock was slowly turning into a beautiful plan. She was co-parenting with the man who led to her Florence nightmare. After that Florence year, Bonnie would never be friendly with a Salvatore. However, she only knew Enzo, so he could only assume she had no idea who Damon was and he could gamble on that.

"Then you clearly know she has nothing to talk to you about," Damon answered and he was ready to hang up. Everything he knew about this man made his skin crawl. He was thinking that Giuseppe would be proud he had; he knew enough to wish the young man death, or actually order his death. He had spent enough time with shady men to follow the course of their minds.

"I had a few words for her, but they would of better use on you. We should talk about your little secret, because I am sure she does not know how you came to be her baby daddy. I will call you later," he said with a cockiness that made Damon wish they could be in the same room.

It was an unexpected turn of events. Damon felt the color draining from his face; he would come clean before it all exploded on his face.

"It might not be Florence, but I am still a Salvatore. Stay away from her." He hung up and he did his best to regain his prior mood. He would talk to her the next day. He needed to do it before she heard it from the wrong source. To make matters worse, his father would be here the next week. The walls were closing in on him.

"Who was it?" Bonnie finally asked when she could control her laughter.

"A mistake," he lied. A mistake that might bit him in the ass. He returned to them and laid by his family. He needed to move quickly. He knew how men like her ex thought. If Kol had called her, he wanted something from her, or he wished to hurt her again. Damon needed to protect his family.

* * *

Kol Mikealson was known to be a vindictive opportunist. If he saw a way to milk the situation, he would do his best to get some money from it. In addition, having dirt on a Salvatore was a way to ruin Bonnie's happy life, the one Freya told him about, the family that he could have had. Now his life was a never ending misery, and she was playing happy family with one of the heirs of the richest man in Florence.

He only deserved a piece of that sweet cake. He would get it either by Bonnie that was why he called but well the Salvatore was the best option or third one he would make a mess of the situation. He was not over what that little surrogate child took away from him, he lost her five years ago because he went too far about that child. He still loved his Bonnie; no one ever loved him better. An unexpected turn of events it was.

.


	21. Chapter 21

_**Thank you for reviewing, adding to your favorite, and following. Just hope you will review more. Here is the new chapter.**_

 _ **Thanks to my amazing beta Danielle aka isawyouasaperson**_

 _ **I disclaim everything, I only own the story line and Leila**_

* * *

"If you answer it, I am breaking up with you." Damon broke their kiss and looked her straight in the eye.

His eyes could hardly carry the threat because his lust had deepened the color of his irises into a deep blue. He kissed her neck while he waited for her to answer his threat. She let her fingers graze his back; much like him, she was not enjoying the interruption but she did not have that much of a choice.

"Yeah, that is not happening, but soon that little girl will start crying, so let me save both of us the heartbreak. She probably had a nightmare." She countered him confidently and she tried to shove him away but he just let his weight make her sink back in the bed.

"Mommy…papa… MOMMY!" Leila started shouting from behind the closed door.

It was only matter of time before she woke the entire house up as she did the other days. She had been knocking for a minute and with each second passing, she was becoming cranky.

"Bonnie, Baby, you can't always fall for that nightmare excuse. It's all a masterplan. Babe, just an hour, I'll be fast. Baby," Damon drew the word out with the sexiest tone he could use.

He stopped her moving legs and he replaced himself between them. He kissed his way from her neck to her breast. He could always try to keep her distracted. He grabbed her legs and wrapped them around his waist. He kissed more passionately when he noticed her attention straining away, this was the first chance he got in a week to have sex with his beautiful girlfriend but his daughter was not having it.

"Damon Salvatore, will you be kind enough to let me go, our daughter needs us," Bonnie groaned as she succeeded to move him from above her. She sat up and he grabbed her waist to stop her. "I know that you understand that she will not stop until we open this door." She leaned to kiss him after she broke his embrace.

"We are raising a spoiled child. I blame you for this and that. How does she do it? Does she have a sixth sense that informs her? 'Stop them they are trying to make another child!' Bonnie, your child is evil," He said jokingly but his voice had an edge of frustration. He looked adorable with his pouty expression. She would have given in if Leila were not so insisting with her knock.

"One, we are not trying to make a child, we can't even deal with one without you calling her a demon. Two, you can survive without round three." She rolled her eyes at him even though she wanted him as much as he wanted her. However, she was the reasonable parent in such cases. She quickly tried to fix her morning sex appearance. She looked for her nightgown that Damon threw somewhere in the midst of their lovemaking.

"I'm just trying to get it out of my system before I have to spend an entire week without you." He said with a soft tone and he gave her one of his trademark smirk that a pout quickly replaced. She smiled at his childish self and she was sure that she would miss him as much he did her when she would be in New York trying to fix the last details for her big return to school.

She bent to smooth his frown away with another kiss and he used the opportunity to drag her back into their bed. He passionately kissed her and he pushed her back under him. She moaned under his assault and he started kissing her jaw with the same passion but quickly another loud knock destroyed the mood. If she knocked one more time, Leila would break that door.

"MOMMY…PAPA…MOMMY…PAPA!" she only shouted louder. Damon sighed and he reluctantly let go of Bonnie.

"Send her off or we're breaking up." He added after he slapped her ass. She rolled her eyes at him, but grabbed his hand and held it for a second when she caressed his fingers. He grabbed his shirt and threw it to her so she could wear it. Bonnie grabbed his pants from the floor and threw them at him.

"I don't want my child in therapy." She said as she walked toward the door after wearing Damon's shirt and waiting for him to cover up.

"Your child will need therapy anyway; actually you both need it to break you apart." He sassed with a mocking smile. "You can open now, we both look decent," he added after she stood a good minute near the door waiting for him to be dressed.

* * *

"Papa!" Leila ran straight toward the bed once Bonnie opened the door. She jumped on the bed and Damon did not need a second to forget all of his complaints. After all, his princess was still a daddy's girl.

She finally laid on the bed once she was exhausted, and Damon wrapped her in a bear hug. Bonnie rolled her eyes as she closed the door to their room but as soon as her eyes landed on her small family, a big smile overtook her features.

"But I'm the one spoiling her," she mumbled as she climbed back into their bed. She kissed Leila forehead and the little girl broke out of Damon's embrace to kiss Bonnie on the cheek. "Hey baby girl, you are awake early." Bonnie said between kisses on Leila's cheek. "You missed your daddy," she added just to tease Damon, who had an unamused smile, which was slowly turning in a bright one now that his daughter was holding on to him like a monkey.

"Dance today with nonna, mommy, but I missed you too not only papa." The little girl was too excited to form a full sentence. She rearranged herself between her parents.

"That is in the afternoon baby, and now it is barely six in the morning," Bonnie said before she broke into a laugh. Only her daughter could have such reaction. "Let me guess, you didn't sleep thinking about it," she said matter of factly. Leila nodded and Damon mouthed to Bonnie the word spoiled. She slightly tapped on his shoulder, and she refocused her attention on Leila.

"Sorry mommy," she apologized a bit embarrassed but the excitement was still there. "Can we just go this morning mommy?" She pouted and she made her best to appeal at Bonnie's weakness. Unfortunately, Bonnie was becoming a tougher audience, especially with Damon's presence. If she gave in, she would not hear the end of this story.

"What if we sleep first all together in this bed and then we will go visit your nonna?"Damon only rolled his eyes at the suggestion but already made some space for their daughter.

"Here." Bonnie laid on one side of Leila and Damon was on the other side. The Bennett girl kissed her daughter's cheek and then she kissed Damon.

* * *

"Baby girl you should take a break." Bonnie shouted to Leila, who had been practicing a jete for almost half an hour. She slowly sat near Lily who had been observing them since they arrived. She smiled at her daughter who was such a studious learner; her little girl always gave her best.

"Does she ever stop?" The Salvatore matriarch asked in a happy tone. She was trying to make conversation with Bonnie. She had to admit that with time it was becoming easier to talk with her son's girlfriend. However, it could be better without the slight tension on both sides. They were always those awkward silences, but it only had been few days since she arrived.

"She doesn't stop and it is exhausting for everyone around her, but I think we are all grateful that she has enough energy to get all of us exhausted," Bonnie answered with a voice filled with pride. Her beautiful face lit up with a proud smile. Lily agreed silently to the statement. She was as happy as Bonnie was for the change in her granddaughter's condition.

"I don't think I did it when we met but thank you for what you did," Lily said with a sincere smile. She understood that without Bonnie's marrow, her granddaughter would be living in hell and going through so much pain. The middle age woman continued observing her joyful granddaughter with a content smile.

"You didn't have to, I am just happy that she is perfectly fine and from now we don't have to worry about any health complications. I cross my finger; I don't want her to go through anything else," The Bennett girl answered but her eyes stayed on her daughter. She would do everything in her power to ensure that her little girl would have a happy childhood.

"Can you wait for a second Lily? I think if I don't stop her this little girl will break her leg." She quickly stood to walk back to the place where Leila was practicing.

Lily quietly observed the mother daughter pair as she had done the past days. It was so easy to be aware of the deep-rooted love between them; she stared at them as Bonnie was forcing a reluctant Leila to take a break. She was grateful that Leila finally found such love, but she also felt that little anger that it happened so late. She put some of the blame on Bonnie's actions in the past but mostly she blamed Rose for being a bad mother. That small lingering feeling created some of the tension between the two women.

* * *

Bonnie gave the little girl a water bottle and she finally smiled when Leila agreed to sit for at least ten minutes. Lily looked at Bonnie. She was becoming more inclined to make space in her family for the young woman. They still needed to clear the air, but she could say that the Bennett woman was her son's only girlfriend who got close to receive a stamp of approval. She acted responsibly; she was independent, maybe even to a fault.

"Sorry it took longer than expected; she is as stubborn as her father. You should join her. I am sure she will love having a different dance partner. She is getting tired of her mother." It took Bonnie a second to notice that she referred to herself as Leila's mother. She had never done it before, at least, she had not done it in the middle of a conversation with anyone else than herself. A small smile crept onto her lips because suddenly she realized that was what she was.

"I will leave dancing to you; I never was a great dancer. It must be something nice to share a passion with her. I remember when I use to take Damon to his drama class; it uses to warm my heart," Lily warmly said. She thought that it would be nice to share some memories with Bonnie, just anything making it easier to avoid the awkwardness still present. Lily was certain that Bonnie would last longer than any other women in Damon's life could, she had that deep-rooted feeling, and maybe that was what made it a little hard to let the young woman fully in the circle.

"Oh, that's true Damon told me that you use to be a famous actress before meeting his father. That must have been amazing to be in all those cinematographic productions but it also must have been hard to find time to have a proper family life. I already have hard time to rearrange my schedule to match my different jobs with the time that I need to spend with Leila. Now with going back to school we might have even less time together. I can't believe that I will have to find her a ballet class," Bonnie said regretfully and sighed heavily. However, she was really trying to create a connection and maybe receiving so advice from Lily could help.

Her return to school was complicating many things but she had her entire family's support, and it kept her focused. She was already dreading the week she would have to spend away from them. However, she wanted to have something of her own, so she was holding on to dancing. She was Leila's mother before everything else, but as her grams pointed, she could keep things of her past life that made her happy without affecting her new dynamic. She did not have to forget about herself for anyone's sake; she needed to protect her happiness because she could not be a good mom if she was unhappy while doing it.

 _That was what happened with Abby. You can only fail your daughter if at the end; you resent her for every unhappy moment in your life_. She finally started to understand few of her mother's choices. Abby was not always that selfish mother and Bonnie was trying to not follow in her footsteps. She would do her best to be happy if it meant that she could maintain balance in her life.

It was different from her younger years when she thought sacrificing her dream would be the only way to achieve a happy family. Suddenly, her happiness mattered too because the people around her cherished her enough to be affected by her emotions. Damon wanted her fulfilled in every aspect of her life, Sheila wanted her happy, and Leila deserved a mother that showed her what self-care was. Having a life out of those people was necessary for her sanity, knowing when to make selfish decisions would be her salvation, and she finally found the balance between her generosity and a well thought selfishness. She had been too generous before and then she had been too selfish at other times.

* * *

"Oh that was quite early; I gave up after Damon became a handful, he was a bit of a mama's boy. Then it was hurting me more to be away from him, I had the impression that I did not deserve to be his mother if I could not make time for him. I was fulfilled as a housewife. I actually only became an actress by accident but it helped me meet Sep, so when time came to pick between my child and a fun job, it was easy. However, we all have different parenting styles. Things are different for you, and a dancing career might bring fulfillment that motherhood would never and well..." Lily stopped before she added that Bonnie had not been that present before these past months, so it might not matter at the end.

However, between the questioning tone at the end and her condescending tone could, Bonnie picked up on her meaning.

Lily was from a very conservative Italian family, some of her view could be strongly criticized, and on some other things, she could be extremely modern. When she noticed that her words were out of place, she promptly stopped, but sadly, their corrosive powers were in full effect. She smiled politely but the Salvatore matriarch noticed the growing discomfort. The unsaid resonated loudly in their newfound silence and she stuttered as she tried to go back to lighter subjects.

 _Talking about turning your tongue seven times in your mouth before speaking. The young woman hardly deserves such harsh words_ , she thought regretfully and she was ready to apologize, but she looked at Bonnie and the young woman had a stoic face. The rampant anger was slowly surfacing.

The little part about being a deserving mother did not escape Bonnie, she tried to bounce on everything else that the matriarch had said along her little explaining, but that sentence stuck because Leila had only recently started to call her mommy. Until someone else questioned how deserving of being Leila's mother she was, it never became clear that the question should never be asked. She drew some air, trying to clear her throat, but it failed. The sentiment of warranted irritation was strong. No one had the right to question the mother that she was, and she wanted that fact understood by everyone.

"Would you wonder the same thing when it comes to Damon? He works six days a week but that does not make him an undeserving father. He comes home right on dinnertime, so that is enough to make him a deserving father. However because I can't be present for ballet classes and have dream of my own. I don't deserve my daughter?" she asked bitterly. The double standard exhausted her.

She was not fond of the idea that school could change the structure of the family that she was building; she had needed reassurance and an extra push to pursue her dream. Lily was unaware of the background and all the trouble she went through with pursuing a career while being an active mother. However, her words latched on insecurities that were slowly becoming prevalent in Bonnie's thought.

 _Will she feel abandoned? Will we make it work? Is it so important? Maybe I can wait few more years until Leila is no longer scared of being abandoned? What if I focus too much on my career then I neglect her as much as my father neglected me?_ Those were her constant thoughts and she was fighting hard to silence them.

Lily's pour choice of words just stumbled on an assortment of issues. Bonnie did not need someone voicing her thoughts aloud; she did not want someone to state them as fact. Her father was a workaholic who never made time for her. She resented it, but until she saw a prime example of a balance relationship between fatherhood and work, she had no idea that it could be done.

It might seem uninformed but she had no experience with healthy family dynamic. She understood broken family because she came from one and she saw a lot around her, the Mikealson family had absent parents that bought their children's affections. Kol was another example of what she thought resulted from family with working parents. Therefore, she was reasonably worried about the situation until she understood that those people just didn't care about their parent role.

* * *

"Well Damon had been present all along her life, it already makes him more deserving, we can't say the same about you…" Lily said without a second thought. Mostly, it was a motherly defensive stance. She jumped without a calculated answer to protect her son from what she assumed to be an attack on his part as a father.

It took her a minute to process her own words and Bonnie's meaning. She deeply regretted going there, specifically because she promised Damon never to use Bonnie's teenage mistakes against her. She quickly tried to apologize as she slowly took conscience of her insulting tone. She looked at Leila who was still dancing, oblivious to the complicated situation happening between the adults in the room.

"I am sorry, that was uncalled for, and I always try to be polite. I apologize again." She tried to fix her mistake with words, but Bonnie was not quite ready to accept a cheap excuse.

"My grams has the habit of saying that sometime politeness is a short path to hypocrisy. It might be easy for the both of us to reach an understanding if you say what you want to say, Mrs. Salvatore," Bonnie said after she caught another suspicious look from Lily. She raised an eyebrow and she did her best to keep her voice low. They were both making efforts to have a cordial relationship, but everything was turning into a great farce. It was exhausting to walk on eggshells and maybe this was a good thing. Finally, there was some honesty, even if it was hurtful.

The surprise caused by Bonnie's words brought an instantaneous bright red flush to Lily's cheek. She quickly tried to look away. However, what was the point of doing so when the young woman already caught her? She had already spilled some of her controversial opinions. Bonnie was much like her grandmother, she could be extremely blunt if the situation requested it. The Salvatore matriarch was already familiar with Sheila's sharp tongue. She took a deep breath and tried to approach the conversation with an open mind.

"I wish there were some wine in this place or something that could help loosen the tongue. I am a bit of an old fashion person; I like to have heavy conversation when the atmosphere is not oppressive, but I already spoiled the mood," she said with a polite smile. Politeness was a great cover for a woman like Lily. She was the madam of Florence and sometimes biting her tongue was necessary in her environment.

She certainly had a great deal of opinions to share with Bonnie, but she was careful about it. There were no needs to antagonize the Bennett girl if later on she could prove her wrong. She was satisfied with the polite silence and careful observation. However, it seemed Bonnie was one for confrontation rather than hypocritical peace. Definitely the perfect match to her son.

"Damon told me not to hold it against you, but we think differently. I think that I can judge your will to be a mother on it. We all have hard time and when I was pregnant of Damon I was almost as young as you but I surely did not think he was a meal ticket." Lily went straight to the point she wanted to make. After several days of avoiding the subject, she clearly felt lighter.

"You'd think that having a child at a young age might give you an internal knowledge of what led to my actions," Bonnie said with a soft tone. She could understand the conclusion that people drew on her surrogacy situation. She rearranged herself on the floor and she sat comfortably. She stopped supervising Leila and focused her full attention on Lily. The woman seemed to be willing to have a constructive conversation once she exposed her concern.

"Everyone seems to forget that Damon would not have a chance to be a father if I did not step down. Leila would have had an awful life if I had keep her and I am not saying it because I want to ease my conscious. At seventeen, I was gullible. I was stupid enough to end up in a complicated situation, and worst of it all, I was unstable. Choosing to be a surrogate was a mistake that resulted in a complicated situation because it was not a mature decision. There was anger, there was frustration, but there was also a lot of love. I love my daughter more than anyone else in this world, I always have, and that is not something to be questioned." Bonnie's tone was cutting but it conveyed all the emotion she wanted. She refused to cry because of the rampant anger and emotion.

Somewhere, she was already talking to herself. She was finally sure that she had no reason to question her place in Leila's life. She took a deep breath, thinking about the fact that for seven years she had not realized the truth. She never understood her own actions all along and it was heart wrecking. She punished herself during six years for the wisest and the most selfless thing she did.

 _It was her happiness against mine. It was a secure home with two willing adults or nowhere to go after being released from the hospital. It was a piece of my soul against an assurance of a childhood for my baby_. She finally understood the choice that she made after she found Leila in Damon's arms. She cleaned the proud tear before it fell and she drew more air. It felt as if her lung could infinitely expand. Her complicated and painful choice led her to this moment when she could sit on the side while she observed her daughter dancing happily.

"The day when you have to choose between yourself and your child, the choice you make says it all. You chose Damon over acting and I became deserving to be her mother when I let Damon happily walk out of that hospital with my child. From her first breath, I might have made mistakes but she was always a priority. I knew that I would never be the same after if I gave her a way, I cried on that hospital ground with only one thought as comfort; 'My baby will have a bed tonight; she will have food tomorrow and a loving family as she grows up.' It was the best decision because now look at her. I have been present since the beginning and I gave her more than I had." She finished confidently and she felt the weight of years of remorse fly away. She did her best seven years ago, she did what a good mother had to do, and it took her seven years to understand it.

* * *

"I never knew how much it cost someone else. I saw her two days after Damon brought her, and I had no thoughts for the sacrifice you made. I had to spend a week without Stefan the second he was born because he was premature. He was in the next room and still my heart broke. I can't understand the amount of pain you went through. However, I can be humble enough to issue more than a polite apology. No one can say that you're not her mother and I assumed rather than understanding," Lily sincerely said and she was wiping a tear in the corner of her eyes.

 _He found himself a strong woman_. The thought became so clear in her mind. She felt ridiculous for caring such prejudice.

"I know you said my opinion does not matter but you definitely are a good mother. Now that does not change the fact I will be looking above your shoulder, not because I am suspicious but simply that is what Italian mother in law do. I know I must come around as a difficult person but maybe I just care too much from child as you do yours. I am a bit bitter because my son will soon be yours but having you as a daughter will be an honor. I can't say I understand the hardship of the situation but at the end, Leila did found her way to you because definitely you deserve it every time she calls you mommy." Lily expanded on the matter and Bonnie answered with a smile but she was almost in tears. Talking about the abandonment always was a touchy subject.

"Thank you for saving her seven years ago, because that was what you did. I am sorry I overstepped my boundaries and I really did not intended the day to finish in such heavy conversation but I am glad I have to see your point of view. I wanted to offer you these as a peace offering this morning but right now, it is more a thank you gift and also I will apologize better." She extended an usb flash drive to Bonnie whom wore a surprised expression but she gladly took it because for once she was sure that it was not force politeness.

This time Lily was genuine and she could easily say that she had now a strong affection for the young woman whom had bare her scars with so much dignity. Bonnie had not begged for pity, she had explain the reality behind a hard decision. She had politely reply to a misinformed judgement. She shared something deep; she shared a piece of history behind what saved her granddaughter from a harsher life. Lily bent and she kissed Bonnie's cheek in a very motherly way and she smoothened her hair. It took Bonnie by surprised but she later on hug the woman, she felt as if she had just reach an understanding. They will both do everything for their children and that gave them a ground to build a relationship.

"Inside there is videos of Leila, tones of baby picture. I brought it for Damon because I wanted him to have them now that he was more involved. Sep and I use to babysit a lot. It was hypocritical to judge you when it took Damon few years to come around too, but it seems god has been working on a schedule for my grandchild; she got her parent when she needed them the most. You missed so many moments of her life, and I hope this can help correct some things," Lily added with a contagious smile. She could only agree that Bonnie Bennett was a lovely girl.

"Thank you," was all Bonnie could say but she held the flash drive tightly. She turned her attention back to Leila, who was finally slowing down. "I think she is finally exhausted. It was a long day and I think she might want to sleep after that." Bonnie was happy that they could easily transitioned to lighter subject. The ice had been broken and it felt good not to worry about what Lily thought of her.

"I doubt it will be the case. I would stay to help, but I actually have dinner with your grandmother. She wanted us to have a talk. Should I be worried?" Lily joked but now she was impatient to properly be introduced to the woman that raised Bonnie.

"Well if you want to be invited to the family dinner of Friday, you need to pass this mock test. Damon and Stefan had to survive those one-on-one dinners," Bonnie supplied as an answer.

"Oh, I will do my best but I think she does not like me that much, I was a bit awful to you the first day," Lily said, getting worried. She saw the tight clan that they were forming around her granddaughter and she would be happy to be part of that circle.

"Loving Leila unconditionally is enough to get anyone a seat at the table. And that I am sure you do," Bonnie replied with another smile.

* * *

Those were fancy hall, he had to admit, marble on the ground and chandelier on the roof. He slowly made his way through the corridor. He had done a good job avoiding reception and security, and now all he had to do was to find Damon Salvatore's office. He stopped in front of every door and checked every golden plaque. He was getting extremely irritated, something needed to recompense his dedication to this enterprise, and this was the fortieth floor still no sign of a Damon Salvatore.

"Hello, I have an appointment with Mr. Salvatore but I can't find the floor." He could not believe how he did not think about this before stupidly going around forty floors but it was worth it.

"Yes, Mr. Wells, the 4 pm appointment. 42nd floor." Kol smiled widely and started making his way to the forty-second floor.

He could not stop the whistle that left his mouth. When people talked about wealth, this was what they meant. He looked around and he was astounded. Sure, he came from money and he was used to luxury, but this was quite extravagant. However, he could only expect something similar from the heir of multiple casinos. The Salvatores were loaded and he could not believe that he did not jump on this boat earlier. He regretfully thought about all the missed opportunities of his youth.

He should have encouraged Bonnie to keep that child and he could have bargained for more than twenty thousand euro. He was young, naïve and in debt, he clearly lacked basic intelligence. He shook his head, thinking of how much more he could have made if he had just been smarter. Back in the day, money was not really the issue. His parent could have gotten him out the situation but he was scared to come forward.

However, right now money was an issue; in the past five years, everything went to hell. Mikael and Esther had enough of his ways and he was cut off the family's money. He quickly had to do worse than force a young girl to become a surrogate and all of that made him resentful. It seemed his happiest times were with Bonnie; he took a greater time to recover from the break up than he thought it would take. Only when he lost her did her worth became visible.

He had stalked her few years until she took a restraining order against him, _the bitch_. He could never forgive her; after all, he just wanted them to be back together during those years. He broke the order few times. He had followed her to New York full of hope, and she called the cops on him. _That bitch, that bitch she got karma coming_. Every time he thought of Bonnie, he always had that rush of anger. She destroyed his life; her leaving led to a cascade of event, or at least that was how he chose to see it.

He stopped being in control of his addiction the month that followed their break up. He needed something to help deal with the confusing emotions; he needed something to deal with the anger. Unfortunately, he had lost his punching ball. Bonnie was the person that took away the rage, and once she was gone, he only had gambling. After few too large bills, Mikael sent him a thousand dollars and told him that he could find himself a new family.

In the past two years, his feelings for Bonnie danced between obsession and putrid hate. In his head, their relationship was a sort of outlet; five years and he was still not over the fantasy. Imagine his anger and rage when he received a message from his sister, telling him that she was sorry that love of his life cheated on him and that she finally understood why he went down a dark path. He wanted to curse Freya, but he did nothing. He asked her why she thought that Bonnie cheated, and the rest was history. She could not have the life she dreamed about without him. It did not sit right with him that she got her daughter back, and now he came to get his share of this happiness.

She left him to be happy but maybe if she became unhappy she could come back. _I will simply settle for seeing her unhappy with a check as bonus,_ he thought as he finally stopped in front of the wooden door with the name 'Damon Salvatore'. His smile spread and he softly knocked.

* * *

There were no other way to solve his problem; Damon knew he needed to come clean. However, it was all about timing. _Maybe she will take it better now that Leila is healthy. Leila, you have to think about Leila_. His thoughts were slowly strangling him. He could not have a break, it was an endless source of worries, and it was ruining his life. He had tried to tell her, but it would take longer than a second, which was how much time they had shared recently. Leila took a huge portion of their time, and Bonnie was extremely occupied with her return to school.

They both had a lot in their plates: returning to school, moving to New York, and finally finding the right pediatrician for Leila. He could not steal time that they both did not have. However, everything was pressing him to say something; his dad would be there in a week, and her crazy ex was back in the picture. He had blocked Kol's number, but he doubted that it would stop the man. Something the young man said caught his attention.

 _He remembers me, but I have never meet him, or you don't remember during that time you did a lot more for the family_. _At least I did more than taking on criminal case, I handled binding contract_ , he thought regretfully. If he handled the contract that bonded Bonnie with that debt, then he needed to tell her. She had thought that she could have kept Leila, but if she did sign a contract that he worked on, then she had no way out. If she had tried to keep Leila, she would have gone straight to jail for kidnapping.

"So you're her new man?" a voice broke Damon out his thoughts. Kol had been in the room for longer than a minute, but Damon still had not noticed him.

"Excuse me?" The elder Salvatore tried to clear his confused mind; the voice and that bitter tone were familiar. He raised his head and his eyes fell on a blond man with an unsettling smile standing in the middle of his office.

"Bonnie, you must be the replacement, mate. By the way, how is she?" Kol walked up to his desk and he took a seat. He quickly made himself at home, crossing his legs on Damon's desk.

"I doubt that I am a replacement to you. It's been five years; she moved on before I made it to the picture. To answer your question, my girlfriend is okay and she still wants nothing to do with you." Damon shutdown his computer and he laughed at the little frown forming on Kol's face. "You really thought that she spent five years crying over you, hmm?" he could barely hold the mocking laughs.

"But she talked about me, she told you about me," Kol replied, trying to regain some confidence. He was not here for this; he was here because he wanted his deserved share.

"A psychotic ex isn't a fun subject, don't flatter yourself, and your presence here only confirms that fact. Therefore, I will shorten the trip for you. Any threat you can come up with I have heard worse or I made worse. Whatever you want with Bonnie, for your own sake, stay away from her. You have a long history with my family, so I assume that you know that we don't make idle threats. Thanks for the visit." Damon finished his little speech, and it was clear in his eyes that he meant every word he said. If Kol wanted to get to the mother of his child, then he would have to put his life on the line. He knew how to be his father's son when the situation called for it.

"You talk big game for someone in an office. Now, I did not come here because I am after your pretty girlfriend. I am done with Bonnie Bennett; I had my share of her antics. I am here because I think I have something on you." Kol ignored everything said previously. The only Salvatore he knew to be dangerous was the one called Stefan. "You have yourself a pretty family, thanks to me." He grabbed the family picture with Bonnie and Leila.

Damon calmly took the picture and put it on the desk. He stared at Kol and wondered how fast he could find everything needed to end the man's life. He was getting bored of this little game. Looking at the man in front of him, he was probably a low life criminal who thought he could maybe get some money out of whatever information he had on Damon.

"You have something on me? I already told you, in this room, the only one able to issue threat it is I. Whatever you have, I don't really care to know it. If you thought about making money out of it, reconsider your plans. Now, get out of my office before I call the security and stay away from my family while I'm still feeling merciful." Damon had his finger on the buzzer. He was never one to be patient with possible threats. Stefan was the diplomatic son, Damon was always too volatile.

"You were less bold in that office. All honesty and wondering if such a drastic contract was necessary. She signed it without reading it. Does she know that I saved her from several years of jail time? I gave a lawyer that contract when I found out that you were playing family. You're pretty cruel, Giuseppe found the surrogacy, but you made sure that there was no way out of it. Does she know that she had no chance to keep that thing because you created an unbreakable contract? She broke up with me because I kept her away from her 'baby' but you did the same." Kol finally pressed on what he though was his advantage.

Damon did not show any sign of weakness. He was slightly relieved that his suspicions were true. He did not know what to expect from Bonnie, but this meant peace for her. He was unsure if that meant losing her but maybe if he took the guilt away, he would be able to unlock that last barrier. She might finally be more forgiving of herself and she would be able to tell Leila the truth. He knew that it was risky, but Leila and Bonnie mattered more than he did. He could handle an argument, he could handle a break up, and he was sure that he could win her back. They were mature enough as a couple to overcome whatever difficulties came their way.

Kol was the incentive that he needed to get over his fear. He always wanted Bonnie to be able to trust him more, but he hardly trusted her. She was no longer the fragile girl that he met a year ago. They had so much to lose, and she would be angry because he betrayed her trust. However, he could regain it. Now he was just harming her with his omission, and he could no longer hide behind reasons like lack of time.

"'I will tell your girlfriend' that is your big threat? Thanks for the visit," Damon said and he went back to working.

"Your little girl is beautiful, a pity if something happens to her. That will break Bonnie's heart. Is that enough of a threat?" Kol took one last look at the family picture and left. If they wanted it that way, he would give it to them.


	22. Chapter 22

_**Thanks for the review, follow and adding to your favorite. Sorry for the late update but life happens but here is the new chapter, please review.**_

 _ **I don't own anything except the plot and Leila.**_

 _ **Thanks to Danielle aka isawyouasaperson for always making the story readable,**_

* * *

 _Why do they always have to choose the hard way?_ Kol thought cynically as he faced the Damon's office door. He let out a sigh, and started thinking about what steps to take next. He never expected the Salvatore golden boy to push back, not after their first meeting.

 _The piece of shit was spurting idealist shit in his father office but now he wants to threaten me. Me of all people, that softy threatening me!_ he thought angrily, his blood pressure rising. He needed to do something drastic to prove a point. He needed to teach Damon a lesson.

Kol looked ahead of him and waited for an opportunity to even the score. He should have left, that was the reasonable thing to do, but he patiently waited hours until he saw Damon leave. He slowly unglued himself from the corner where he hid for hours whilst trying to avoid the security guys. He unwound his tired muscles; after hours of dedicated standing, they were stiff. Watching Damon while made his way to the car, Kol followed with a single thought in mind.

 _He drove me to this, I was attempting to resolve this peacefully, but no he had to try me._ Kol shook his head once again frustrated. He followed the Salvatore cautiously, he swerved through cars trying his best to keep the tail, and he did all of it with no idea of what he was planning to do next but simply forced into actions by Damon's pride and condescending behavior. What Kol did was never entirely his fault, all his bad deeds and their consequences on others were never his fault. His choices just consequences induced by antagonist behavior from other or he wanted to see it.

Hurt that the arrogant Salvatore had so quickly dismissed him, Kol was bound to do something catastrophic, something that would hurt everyone but him. He had no idea what he wanted to do but he needed to make the eldest Salvatore pay. In addition, he also wanted to make Bonnie regret her choice to associate with Damon. Somehow, it always came back to what he could do to Bonnie, what he could do to get her attention. He had tried those past years but she had blocked all access to her. No, not all; just a few months ago, she had texted him. It hadn't made sense, not until he received Freya's call. Now he could understand that conversation. She texted him when Damon first found her.

* * *

 **I need the name of the agency you hooked me up with. They messed up**. That was the first text in three years, and he could still remember his excitement but also his resentful anger that it was about the fucking surrogacy, always the fucking surrogacy. However, his joy at having a new opportunity pushed his anger aside.

Three years without even acknowledging my existence and that is what you want to talk about. He had not succeeded in being neutral but he had tried to keep his animosity at bay. That was his opportunity to find his way back to her.

 **You know what forget about it and please don't take this as a sign to call me back. You and I still have nothing to talk about**. All hopes squashed with few words laying brightly on his phone screen.

 _Who did that bitch think she is? Who the fuck Bonnie Bennett thinks she is_. His anger had resurfaced violently but still he had tried to regain some of her affection.

 **Bon you can't be like this forever, it was not my fault, and you need to accept that**. He had tried the mature approach; she always reproached him to be immature.

 **You know what, I have something to tell you, and I think I haven't said it enough: FUCK YOU and GO TO HELL.** That had cause him to snap the next minute, and he had tried to call her, but already she had blocked his number.

Kol tried to shake himself out of the memory. It was several months ago, almost a year, and now here he was trailing her new beau. He followed Damon dutifully, never losing his car but never being too close. The bitter taste of the Salvatore's word was still clogging his throat. The Mikaelson young man hated to be belittled and with his sharp taunting words.

 _Going to hell, am I? Well, I will take you and pretty boy there with me._ A sadistic smile appeared on his beautiful but weary features. Even though he no longer resembled his younger self, he still had some of that Apollo look under the weight lost and the dark circles around his eyes from his years of substance abuse.

* * *

The anger completely consumed Kol's reason. The young man felt as if Damon destroyed his life and then unfairly built his own upon the ruins of what could have been Kol's future with Bonnie. It all started with the Salvatore family. When they came to collect his debt, and they took everything with them. The money he won from the surrogacy spent in the next hour in another of their casino, and now his girlfriend was dating a Salvatore.

His all life looked like a wicked farce played by the Salvatores. He wanted something in exchange of what he lost and he would go to any lengths to get it.

Kol and Bonnie used to be happy. She gave him what he wanted, stuck with him through everything. She accepted him and loved him exactly how he was. Or she did, until the surrogacy changed everything.

Why did she have to be attached to what was supposed to be quick cash? Why could she not be objective? Seven years later, Kol still thought the same thing. Several girlfriends later, all he remembered of happiness was the years he spent with her. That was why he was here, trailing Damon through town; he was waiting for an opportunity to avenge his hurt ego and get Bonnie back.

He was careful to keep himself at a good distance so that he easily went unnoticed by a troubled Damon. Eventually, he found himself in front of a luxury compound. Everything he saw just infuriated him more; it was the life that slipped through his fingers, but landed right on Bonnie's lap. Damon could pay for his peace, so why wasn't he? Why wasn't he giving in Kol's threat?

Kol's plan was simple; he would make his way through the building then he would assault Damon, just to teach him a lesson. That should be enough to scare him. He told himself, red fogging his vision, whilst he continued following behind Damon. He was walking with a decided step, hoping to corner Damon in the corridor or elevator.

* * *

He was ready to give into his impulses when his eyes narrowed on her. She was coming toward him, and his Bonnie was alone. He stopped and looked ahead to see Damon struggling with his key. He leaned on the closest wall to him to hide a bit, sliding into a small alcove. She could still see him if she passed by him, and so he started waiting for her. He took a deep breath; she was as beautiful or even more beautiful that he remembered.

She still looks better than any other woman does and he gets to have her, he thought regretfully and he glanced in Damon's direction. The Salvatore young man was now making his way back toward his girlfriend. Kol's fingers began to clench and his eyes twitched, but he did his best to keep his calm.

"Bonnie ..." He heard a feminine voice called for her and then he saw a middle age woman appear by her side. He swallowed, he would not have the chance to see her alone, but he could still catch her attention. He moved closer to her whilst doing his best to stay hidden from Damon. He was being so reckless, but he couldn't stop himself.

"Here, I don't know how you do it all day, she weighs a tone the obsession with gelato does not help." Lily passed a drowsy Leila to Bonnie's waiting arms.

Kol looked at the scene with interest. He was slightly disgusted that Bonnie gave up a life of fun for being a mother, but then he caught that smile that put to shame the happiness he thought they had shared. He dated her almost seven years and he had never been privy to such smile. It was bright, it was warm, and worst, it was full of purity. He felt his resentment grow.

"Careful princess, let mommy get a better grip at you. Oh…" she rearranged Leila on her hips and her eyes brightened up unmistakably, she stopped as if she saw something that brightened her day. She was looking in Kol's general direction, and for a second, his heart stopped, but then the words leaving her mouth broke his heart.

"Babe, here comes my hero." She kissed Damon as soon as he stepped in front of her. It was soft, sweet, further infuriating Kol. That kiss was oozing love, love that he had lost, or worse, love that he never received from her. Even if he had been over her, it would have hurt to see it. But he was not over her, and now he was furious.

"Now take her. That is how I do it, Lily. Team work."

 _Could this conversation get cheesier?_

"I missed you," Bonnie said before kissing Damon again. The Salvatore man leaned in to deepen the kiss, and even Kol could see the shiver that traveled down her body. They broke apart and Damon kissed Bonnie's forehead, before kissing the girl's.

 _Fucking perfect family picture, that was why she left._ That thought only fueled his anger. Why did she have to be right about leaving him? Why did have to confirm the fact that he was inadequate to her? The quartet made their way toward the little corner when he was hiding, and he felt the consolation that he might ruin her day when she noticed him. She passed toward him and she stopped a second looking at him. He impatiently waited for the dramatic reaction but all he saw was a complete lack of recognition as her eyes slid past.

 _The fuck she can't remember me_. Then, at that exact moment, it snapped and the hurt swallowed his anger and strangulated his guilt. Kol no longer wanted to teach Damon a lesson, he no longer wanted the money, and he silenced his impulses to make a scene. What he wanted was to destroy that small family. What he wanted was to steal that happiness that he could have never offer her. If he could not make her happy, then there was no point of her being happy. What he wanted was to make her suffer for getting over him, for healing after him, and for just having what he could not have. He retreated deeper into that corridor.

 _You're not even worth a memory. That was why her boyfriend was so prompt to throw that at you. Fuck them and their happiness,_ he thought angrily. _That bitch looked at me and she could even remember me, playing happy family let see until when it last._

* * *

She had not seen such scene in years. The last time she saw her son looking so pitiful, he had announced her that his wife was cheating on him with his best friend, but now there were much deeper reason behind Damon's attempt at binge drinking. Lily sighed and she walked toward Damon. One deep talk was draining enough, mostly because she felt some guilt, so she was unwilling to have another one, but it was her baby boy. She took an empty spot on the couch where he was sitting and she stared at him expectedly but he made no move. She sighed and decided to be pushy about it.

"Now, I don't want to put my nose in your business, but drinking yourself to oblivion won't help." Her statement was received with a laugh, but that did not stop the Salvatore matriarch as she glared at her son. She grabbed the Bourbon glass and she kept it in her hand.

"Mama, you would pay to get a front seat into my business." He continued to laugh but she slapped him on his forearm with exasperation.

"Hey now, so much for being the example mama. I could just pour you your own glass," he taunted when he saw her draining his glass, then he picked another tumbler that he started to fill, but Lily took the bottle from his hand then she put it aside. He sighed and leaned to rest on the couch.

"I just had a deep conversation with Bonnie and she is a pretty intense person. The drink is a prep if her grandmother is anything like her," Lily said with a joking tone, but she was quite worried. Damon placed a reassuring hand on hers and he offered a half smile, it was all he could managed with the stress and fear plaguing him. Lily smiled back then she refocused her attention on her son.

"Don't worry, Bonnie is eight times worse to face when she is angry or unhappy. She has a way of making guilt crawl under your skin with her warm sensitivity and then…" He stopped talking because it led him to think about whatever would happen when he said his part into that mess. Lily looked at him with inquisitive eyes. "We used to have the worst fights before we agreed that Leila was a priority and still now I am afraid to have another one of those," he whispered to himself but his mother still caught his words.

"Is it why you're drinking alone? Where is Stefan? Or, you can talk to me," she attempted to sway him in the direction she wanted but Damon did not take the bait.

"I don't need his judgmental company right now, and it's nothing. Just a drink to relieve stress." Damon tried to brush it away but his entire demeanor contradicted him. She stared at him the same way she did when he was a young boy lying to her and as it used to happen years ago, his discomfort started showing, but he kept his silence. The last thing he wanted was to share this burden with another person with an opinion that could actually hurt him. He really should have talked to Stefan, but his brother was busy preparing to return to Florence.

"I get it, your mama is no longer the woman you want to talk to now that you are in this committed relationship. Do I bother you now, Damianio?" There was a slight hurt in Lily voice, even if she was trying to hide it. She was still trying to adjust to the new family dynamic, but well it felt hard to see her son fully break the umbilical cord.

"Mama... "Damon sighed but he stopped to see the serious expression on his mother features. "Mama, since when did you become the jealous mother type? Don't turn this into how you are losing your sons to their women, well not Stefan, but who knows. You never had such problems when I was married to Rose, so is Bonnie the problem?" He softly spoke and he got closer to her. Damon was not sure he wanted a response to that question. He had noticed something in his mother and girlfriend's dynamic that he hesitated to point out. He wanted them to come to resolution, but now it seemed it had more to do with their mother and son relationship. Therefore, he would handle it.

"Rose... "Lily laughed whole heartedly as if she had never heard better joke. She sighed and cleared a happy tear, it helped with her tense nerves.

 _Being jealous of Rose was pointless_ , she thought but she reconsidered saying it and then she took the entire meaning of his question. _Oh my god he thinks I don't like his girlfriend._ Lily paled at that thought and she even wondered if there were truths in that statement because she had acted out of character.

"Rose was a temporary thing that lasted too long. We all knew, except you, or you did but because you're stubborn you tried to prove us wrong. I never had to make a spot for Rose, she was not going to become family or even take my spot as the favorite woman in your life. But Bonnie? Well, let's just say the Salvatore clan is getting bigger and I still have to adjust," she said with all sincerity and she leaned her head on her son shoulder. She quite easily found the right words at the time. Talking to her son helped clear her own mind.

 _I really need to fix my behavior with the Bambina. What image am I giving of myself with such petty feeling?_ she questioned herself regretfully. She could hardly understand why she made so many mistakes with Bonnie. Was it because she had affection for the girl and she was trying to fight potential deception, or had she acted on pure protectiveness?

"And you don't like it or you don't like her?" he asked with a certain discomfort. His mother's opinion mattered, but it was not absolute, especially if it went against his relationship with Bonnie.

"She is part of the family, I am adjusting gauchely. I'm trying to understand how I deal with a daughter I never asked for. I like her a bit more every day and that frustrates me." She sighed with a flair of drama that she seemed to have passed on to Damon. He looked at her once he finished putting meaning behind her words.

 _Trust mama to complicate something so simple_ , he thought with kindness. There were both silent for a moment focusing on their own thought.

* * *

"Imagine if she had just stayed then all would have been different, we would have avoided that catastrophe that was Rose. I see how everything seems to make sense now and I get angry because it did not happen earlier." She had yet to address the situation, but the conversation with Bonnie led to some introspection. She could not believe that she had been so out of line, accusing the young girl of being a bad mother when all she had seen was a very engaged young mother. "I took some of that frustration on her, but the girl has guts." A beautiful and proud smile drew itself on her lips and it was contagious because Damon responded to it with one of his own.

"I see how she is a good mother, and a good future wife because I am not settling for another one of your bad choices, but I can't get over that little resentment. Why did she have to let you and Leila go through everything alone? She had seven years to come back but you had to go look for her? I don't make sense, bambino, I know it, and it is quite selfish now that I have her perspective to the story," she said regretfully because there were parts of Damon new life that she had wished for years. It seemed so unfair they had to wait all those years to get it when Bonnie could have just walked into their life.

 _Stop putting everything on that child,_ she chastised herself and she promised herself to be more understanding so that what she would push toward that goal. Rose did her carnage, scarred the entire family, and so sometimes she thought what would have happened if Bonnie had stayed or had an epiphany earlier. However, she could not stupidly insist on blaming another victim

"Oh mama... " Damon said softly. He hugged her side tighter, but a little smile drew on his lips. This was something he could easily fixed and maybe it could help him feel a bit prepared before talking to Bonnie.

"Do you remember when Stefano and I were kids? You would blame everyone for what we did wrong, but never us. I stole a piece of cake then it was the maid's fault for not putting it in a place where I could not reach. Or Stefan would fight in school, but you would blame the teacher. You are taking it to a new level with this situation. You are blaming Bonnie for what Rose and I did. Or more my mistakes because we both know you have no love for Rose, not enough to be resentful of what she did. Like you're doing with Bonnie." She simply nodded and she was a bit surprised at Damon's newfound maturity.

 _Your son is making more sense than you did the past week. Blaming Bonnie just because your little sons are too perfect,_ she thought with growing shame. Lily never expected anything from Rose, but still everything that woman brought in her son and granddaughter life needed to be address.

However, she just moved the guilt to Bonnie, because that suddenly found perfect daughter in law made her worried. She wanted to have no expectation if they lost her and she also wanted to take away some of her quality so it did not cause more regret that she could have been a solution earlier.

"I was married to Rose before Bonnie even thought about the surrogacy. My marriage and the mess it was can't be blamed on her, what Rose did was rose fault and what I did was mine. I get it; sometimes I regret that I did not meet her earlier but you know I was not ready. Your problem is that she is perfect and you like her but she took too much time to enter our life," he finished and from the look on Lily's face; she understood her own thought and she felt ridiculous.

"Since when do you make sense?" she asked with a shocked expression but she smiled brightly.

"I had time to question myself and we all had the phase when we blame Rose's wrong doings on Bonnie, but you took it quite far. The truth was she never had the option of staying in Leila's life. No chance at all and I have something to do with it." He regained his brooding expression.

"You might be more mature, but you still tried to avoid reality with alcohol. Since you helped me with advice I did not want but needed, let your mama in when I can see that you're trying to fix your pain with the wrong thing." Lily passed her hand in Damon's hair and she waited patiently for her son to open up.

"I am currently trying to work up the courage to come clean of past mistakes. I always find a way to destroy my own happiness but even alcohol is not helping in dulling the pain. I am so scared mama and she won't forgive me," he says anxiously and there were small tears making their way to the corner of his eyes.

"Is the truth that necessary?" She asked him softly. She always asked a similar question when he was a child scared to talk to Giuseppe. It was not so different from the multiple conversation they had years ago but the stakes were much higher.

"She deserves it. I could live without it, but I have stopped making everything about me. However, I am scared to lose her. I have been scared if it since I met her, so I said nothing. It was not a secret because it could threaten Leila's path to health but it could change the way she perceived me. The truth is necessary because I am tired of lying to her and I want her to fully choose what we have," he answered Lily's question with all the sincerity he could muster at the moment.

"Bonnie is very mature. You two have something good, but if you lie to her longer, she will have every right to not want whatever future you might have. Lying is risking losing her forever, but telling her the truth is having a chance to salvage something and redeem yourself. As you said, she might finally have the opportunity to love all of you like you do with her. You have your past and you have that messy family business, she deserves to be aware of these things. Go tell her and do it sober." She finally gave him a kiss on the cheek and stood from the couch, and then she looked down to her son who needed a little push in the right decision.

"Sometimes you have to let the storm destroy, let it break everything. You go through the bad weather but if it helps you avoid the worse one. Then there is no need running away." She leaned to kiss his forehead as she did the day he announced her that Leila was sick and conveniently she had given him the same advice. He kept it in mind when he came looking for Bonnie's marrow.

"You really like her, huh?" he teased but his heart was not in it. His mind and heart focused on the next hour. He was about to risk something that just a year ago he did not think he would ever have.

"Yes, so make sure I still have a daughter-in-law when I comeback. Go now." She extended her hand and helped Damon up.

"You're good at this mother thing, so you don't have to worry about not being the woman of my life, just make room for someone else." He kissed Lily's cheek and slowly made his way to the room where he could find Bonnie.

* * *

"Papa!" the sound came loud out of the speaker and Bonnie's smile widened. She stared at the video intently and she laughed when Damon appeared to lift Leila. He flashed a victory sign to the camera.

"I knew it would be her first words." She could hear the emotion in his voice and then he started taking a victory lap inside the house. There were manly laughs behind the camera and she could make out Lily's sophisticated laugh. She had watched so much of this video that her eyes were hurting, but Bonnie refused to stop. It felt so good to have the empty spot of her mind filled with more than Damon's anecdotes on Leila's childhood.

 _Always the daddy's girl,_ she thought happily has she watched Leila in the video struggling to use her words. She wiped a tear and stood up to grab more tissues. Damon's bed was filled with used tissues; she had cried her fair share. The first mama was the saddest moment, but it was also the one she watched the most. Somehow, it did not hurt as much as it would have two month ago, or a week ago but the first time Leila called her mommy was something so magical that everything else paled in comparison. She had wanted to wait until she was alone in her home to watch the video but she quickly gave in as soon as she finished putting Leila down for a nap.

"I haven't seen one of those in years. Wait for it and here she is." Damon pointed at the screen where a small Leila started tentatively running and then she fell. Lily appeared on camera and helped the little girl up. The camera flashed on him then it went on Lily that was happily clapping when there was a success.

"After that day, we no longer had peace, though she did keep her grandparents fit." He added a bit of trivial information and he made his way to the bed where Bonnie was lying.

"Do you want to join me or..." She let the sentence hang and she made space for Damon leaving him no real choice but he was happy to oblige. He rolled to her side and he wrapped her in a bear hug.

"So how is it going?" He pointed at the pile of tissues by her side with a bit of concern. He only assumed that it could not be easy for her to watch a little bit of the childhood she missed.

"Better than I thought, I am a sobbing mess but a happy one. I have cried enough to fill a pool but I just feel closer to her watching those videos." She was surprised herself. Somehow, the video just strengthened the conclusion that she came to earlier. She had made the right choice.

"I don't know how both of you can get closer, you are already glued to each other, but if it makes you happy, then I understand. When she got sick, I had that heavy guilt. You know, for not giving her enough time and all other thing we talked about, so I used to watch the videos to remind myself of a better time, a time when my only worries were if she would say papa before mama. Even if during those times I was less present," he supplied and she leaned to kiss him.

"It does not matter. We're both present now and we're trying our best." She smoothed his hair and then she looked at him. What she saw when her eyes landed on his did not please her. Damon had never looked more worried. She paused the screen and she broke out of his hug.

"Was there a problem?" It was a mix between a question and a cry. She already started thinking the worst. It had only been two months since the surgery. "What did the doctor say? She called, right?" Her worries drew Damon out of his musings and he breathed deeply.

"Calm down, everything is fine with Leila as far as I know. We won't know more ntil next month's visit," he reassured her and he tried to scold his feature but he failed.

"So why do you look like the world is ending? What is going on?" her tone still conveyed some fear but she relaxed a bit.

"The world ending is fitting. I guess I am about to lose part of my world." He said with a frightening conviction and that made Bonnie focuse all her attention on him.

"Damon?" She insisted, trying to get him to open up to her. Generally, he was the one trying to pray thing out of her.

"How do I do this? Tell me how I do it babe." He pleaded with her; this seemed like an impossible task.

"First you let me in and then we find a solution together, as always." She lifted his face and she looked straight in his eyes so she could comfort him without using too many words.

"It won't work this time, at least I don't think you will want to help or that I will deserve the help." He slowly removed her hands from his face so he could hold them in his tightly, so tight that it almost hurt, but she did not complain.

"Babe, you're scaring me. What is going on with you? Please let me in." Her voice broke with anguish and she was almost tearing up. Damon quickly wiped up those tears before they could fully form.

"I…" he tried but the word seemed to chunky to leave his throat. He felt as if he need fresh air. "I …" he tried one more time but still nothing came out. Nothing came out of his mouth, his expression drew blank but a lonely tear escaped. He could no longer hold them, and he heavily sighed with despair.

"Damon, what is wrong?" Bonnie's stress only increased and she wiped his tear before it could fall. She circled him with a protective hug and that was when he finally could regain his ability to say more than just one word.

"I fucked up big, I hurt you in the worst way possible, and I swear I didn't know. I just wanted to fix my own troubles at the time."

"What is this all about?" Her mind was running wild and whatever he was doing just make her more worried.

* * *

"Leila, it happened …. My father … And I'm sorry that they got you doing this." Her hand stilled on his back and from that moment, Damon braced himself from the worse. "I should have known better than to ask Giuseppe for help … I'm sorry, babe I get it if …" he let tears fall freely then losing all strength to continue, he went quiet and he just stared at Bonnie, lost. She stopped hugging him and then she took his face between her hands. She looked at him completely lost but at the same time, she was putting the pieces together.

"The casino, his debt…" she drew a deep breath but she did not draw away from him. She looked at him as she started thinking but then she did something that surprised him; she leaned to wipe his tears. "It has been seven years and you did not gamble my passport away or yank Leila out of my arms." She drew a deep breath and she tried her best to keep a cool demeanor. The thought crossed Damon's mind, he could get away with a half-truth, but he could not do that to her.

"You know how you always beat yourself up for not keeping her …" He did his best to regain some strength and he stood to distance himself from her. He knew that he would be unable to withstand the hurt that would replace her comprehensive expression if he were so close to her. "I did more than asking my dad to get me in the surrogate list, during those years I used to draw contract for my father and you might not remember but you signed a contract." He calmly said some of his tears partially dry and he looked at her as she was trying to retrieve her memories.

"Enzo brought one and I was pushed to sign it or more like pressured. Was it your idea?" she whispered her question but she was looking at a thread on the bed. He was still standing meters away from her with his arm crossed and he hesitated between walking back to her.

"I did not know that you chose to be a surrogate to pay a debt, at least I did not know until you told me…" he stopped mid-sentence when she glared at him as if she had finally found something to be angry about but all he saw was the beginning of disappointment. Her caring loving eyes started to dull to something he feared more than her anger. She stopped looking at him all at once. He hesitantly took a deep breath.

"You could not have kept Leila with that contract because it said that once she was born, you lost your parental right and any attempt to keep her would be considered as an act of kidnapping. When you signed it, you lost all rights on Leila. If you kept her, then you would have gone to jail." The lawyer in him came out, he said all of this without flinching, but when he looked at her, he choked on his own words. Then he patiently waited for it to come, the anger, and the reproaches. However, nothing, nothing until the silence broke his heart and then he noticed the tears dripping from her face as she refused to look at him.

"Say something, Babe I am sorry. I never meant to hurt you." He finally left that corner and he came to kneel in front of her. He grabbed her hand and she offered no reaction. She stayed there crying as if she was alone in that room. "I am sorry; it was entirely my fault what happened seven years ago. I never meant to hurt you. Babe please be angry but don't cry." He pleaded with her but her tears fell at a constant pace. She refused to look at him and he did not know what to do. He tried to make her face him but finally she reacted and she pushed his hands away.

* * *

"All of that is not your fault, and I am not stupid enough to blame you for that…" she calmly said but her words did not match her expression. "You made me tell you all my deepest dark secrets, you asked for my trust and I gave it to you but … why are you telling me this right now?" She cocked her head on the side. She knew him too well. What he did seven years ago was not the problem but the decision he took to keep it from her when he asked her to trust him, to have faith in him.

"I…" she cut him before he attempted to lie. She saw red when she understood that he planned to lie again.

"Damon, you did it from an entire year! I told you in that parking lot what happened, so you knew that I was paying a debt to your family but you said nothing, so why now? You lied to me an entire year why the FUCK NOW!" she shouted her anger but then she remembered who was in the next room.

"Why now? Damon Salvatore, I trusted you with everything and you lied to me for an entire year. Let me ask you an easier question: why did you lie?" She put more distance between them, but it was a waste of time. It felt as if the room was closing in around her. She took a deep breath and did her best to remember that they had more to lose than a relationship. However, anger made everything hard to deal with, and she wanted answers.

"You knew how hard it was for me to trust and I did just that with you but you lied to me, so you could get a marrow. What, did you think that I would let my daughter die? All those 'I believe you could be a good mother'… Damon, I trusted you." Her words hit him like an arrow in the heart.

"You are a good mother. Bonbon, you're a perfect mother and hell, even in that parking lot when you were telling me that she was just a piece of your DNA, I knew it. It has nothing to do with Leila," he countered her with sincerity. She looked at him with distrust and that hurt. Anger he could endure, but what she was showing now… Death would have been a walk in the park on spring day.

"Stop lying to me, Damon! Just stop. What's the point? You already started coming clean." She glared at him.

"I lied to you because I wanted you. Even when I was angry with you, I wanted you. If I told you that my family forced you into this mess, then you would have kept me at arm's length, not Leila. Then I continued lying because I had you and I could not lose you for shit I did seven years ago. Then I told you the truth because I could not lose you for keeping the truth to myself. It was all about how much I selfishly wanted you." Suddenly he was the angry one.

She did not answer much but he saw extreme disappointment and she made her way out of the room. He started running after her and he called after her until he caught up with her. He immobilized her in the middle of their living room and she just let her shoulder sink with exhaustion. She was hurting and he knew he did that to her.

* * *

"Babe, say something, be angry but just don't walk away," he pled with her as he grabbed her face between his hands. She did her best not to look him in the eyes, but the blue of his eyes seemed to have magnetic properties. She gave in and something de nouveau broke into her, because she saw everything she knew was there and nothing she wanted to find there. There was deep love that made her stop and think about any decision she could make tonight; a simple impulse of anger could not be a solution. There was shame in Damon's eyes, but that was the last thing she wanted to see. She wanted her anger fueled. And there was worry for her whilst she was hurting because of his deed. She felt anger because she wanted to push those away.

"I wish I could be angry Damon, it would hurt less than what I feel right now, but no it is deeper than that. It is heart wrenching. I don't give a fuck about what you did seven years; I made my peace with that period of my life. We built a family with only one promise and it was honesty, but you went ahead and disrespected that. You lied to me after making sure that I blindly trusted you when you knew how scared I was of trusting anyone. You stood in front of me, heard me tell you everything, and then you lied because you wanted to end up in my bed…" He cut in because he could not let her believe that he used her or misled her.

"I understand that you're hurt but believe me, having sex with you would be the last reason I would choose to lie. I lied because I stupidly thought I would never have what I have now with you if you knew me. I lied because I wanted to have a family with you and then it became true. I lied because I love you and it meant that protecting this love by any means was fair. I lied because I could not lose you, and I know it might have caused the opposite reaction. Bonnie, I lied because I love you," he pled with her and he hoped she could understand.

"I wish I could trust you but … it hurts." She said to him stupidly. That was the only thing she can say to his explanation. "It freaking hurts because I love you with my everything, and now I am scared of trusting you. I feel used. You should have just continued lying because now I have to deal with mistrust, now I have to be angry at you and worse I have to be disappointed at you. It hurts, Damon. You don't even know what you destroyed. Do you even know what you destroyed with your selfishness?" She was trying to keep a dignified face but her tears were not cooperating with her on that task. She was melting in her sorrow.

"I know! I destroyed us, but I promised I will fix us." He took her in his arms trying to sooth her cries but he was only making it worse.

"I wish it's something as simple as us. What you destroyed was a part of me willing to love you without question. Us is not even ours now, Leila is in the middle. With time, us can be handled. We have a child; we don't get to let it be destroyed without working on it. However, Damon you were my confident. I gave you my trust and you knew what it meant because you saw it being built. Now, you not only drag a love through the mud, a love that I knew to be unconditional, but I have to wonder how many times my best friend lied to me. Not my boyfriend, but my best friend. Do you have a solution for that? It hurts and I can't even have my best friend because it is his fault," she softly told him after she broke out of his hug.

"I do plenty of stupid things, but believe me, most of them I do thinking that I am protecting you or thinking that they are out of love. I know, you don't have to say, those are stupid reason but just give me a chance to right things. Be mad at me, hate me, but please don't be hurt. Fucking even break my heart but please stop hurting. I am so sorry but I promise, you will get your best friend back. Just give me a chance." He joins her in the couch where she is now sitting and she only raised her head to look at him. Anyone else she would have walked out of the house.

"Time, I am giving both of us time…" She stood and she finally walked out of that room exhausted. Damon did not follow her. Time was better than anything he expected and he sat on that couch, wondering how he could fix the mess he created.

* * *

"Baby, can mommy sleep in your room?" Bonnie asked a sleepy Leila and the little girl pushed to make some space for her mother.

"Are you okay, mommy?" Just a look at her mother and the little girl could see something was wrong and she tried to stay awake. Bonnie kissed her forehead and she quickly wiped her tears away. She just wanted a reminder of what she risked losing if she acted hastily. Damon and Bonnie went into their relationship knowing what the priority was and thankfully, she was now grounding Bonnie to reality. She could not end the pain by just cutting Damon off. Time was what she could offer him, and then they would see where to go from there.

"I will be if you hug me and take the hurt away. Mommy is sorry…" she did her best not to cry but it was difficult. She looked at her little girl and she remembered that part of Damon's lie brought this situation. She was not ready to forgive him because she had lost part of the trust she put in him, but she was ready to give him a chance to prove himself. There was a knock at the door and she walked toward it even if she did not want to continue the discussion with Damon.

"Kol tried to threaten me. That is why I told you the truth. I am sorry." He leaned and kissed her cheek but he knew that he had just made the situation more hurtful.

"Keep him away from our daughter; keep him away from our family." Every time she heard that name, her happiness was shattered or on a verge of shattering but not this time. She closed the door on Damon without saying more and she laid back on Leila's bed. She hugged her little girl for dear life. Now, the week away in New York seemed like the best thing that could happen to them. She hoped that time could fix the situation, or at least help her and Damon. They both had too much to lose. One reason that made her stay was laying in her arms. The other was that she loved him.

 _We will be okay, right?_


	23. Chapter 23

_**Hello everyone and merry Christmas to those of you who celebrate or luckily don't have exam at that period, this is my present. Thanks for the reviews, follows and adding to your favorite. Definitely left with four and epilogue to write, i know how a story can become tiring so i will try to avoid that , so please if you could review more for the last chapters I will be grateful. Please review, fav, follows and enjoy the holiday season.**_

 _ **i don't own the vampire diaries**_

 _ **thanks to danielle aka isawyouasaperson , and she is amazing for editing all those pages.**_

* * *

"The soup was good, Sheila," Lily said awkwardly as she tried to find a topic for conversation, but Grams simply nodded. The way she looked at the Salvatore matriarch did not help. It had been 45 minutes, and Sheila had said almost nothing besides quick nods and one word answers to Lily's questions. With each second, the discomfort increased, and now even talking about the soup seemed like a herculean effort for Lily.

Lily had tried to advance the conversation, but Sheila shut down each attempt. Lily felt as if she was under a microscope and everything she did was inadequate. She was furious that someone could make her feel so gauche, but she was still trying to be least cordial.

 _Why am I even trying? Why is this woman so hard on me? Why am I trying? Because you are on the verge of becoming family. No, you're already family. For Bonnie and Leila's sake_. The thought felt weird to Lily, trying for Bonnie, but she was family now. The brunette ate more of the soup, but her mind was stuck on Sheila.

After their previous conversation, she could hardly say that Sheila and she had a chance to be more than cordial, but this moment right here proved that the animosity did not come from her. She could not stand this dinner, but she was trying for family's sake. She knew that Sheila was not pleased with her, but she felt compelled to try. They were family now. To fit truly into the new family dynamic, Lily needed to please Sheila.

Sheila sat on the opposite side of the table, drinking her soup without saying much. This dinner had a purpose and the elder Bennett was biding her time. She smirked at Lily moving uncomfortably under her scrutiny. Sheila would be the first to admit that the Bennett women could be extremely petty.

For an entire week, Sheila saw her granddaughter put in the same discomfort by the same woman so offended now by a treatment that she afflicted on others. Sheila had tried taking the Salvatore matriarch aside and speaking to her, but it didn't change the situation. Some people had a hard time processing their actions until they were victims of the same thing. Now that Sheila was choosing who became family, it was Lily's turn to feel the sting of past actions.

 _This woman needs a taste of her own medicine,_ Sheila thought without any malice. It was not meant to be hurtful, but for educational purposes.

As a southern woman, being rude hurt her profoundly, but as a grandmother and great grandmother, no one came after her own. Lily was one of her own too, and that was why she was getting a chance to learn from past mistakes. Sheila was not fully attacking Lily because she wanted a peaceful understanding. She wanted her family to have a good equilibrium of power. She wanted Lily and herself to talk as adults and the matriarchs they were in the family.

However, before that could happen, Lily must be willing to listen, and for that, she had to show the Italian woman where her behavior led. To reach an adult, sometimes you needed to put them in the position where they were forced to behave as such. If Sheila were childish, then courtesy would force Lily to behave maturely. As a former college professor, Sheila often had to remind adults that they were not children.

Childish was the softest and most understanding way to describe Lily's behavior towards Bonnie. However, her class and innate sense of etiquette had prevented her from going extreme in her innocent maternal jealousy and less innocent need to blame Bonnie for the sins of the world. Thankfully, Lily was above a great part of those feelings now, but things were not all perfect. However, there could still be little traces left behind. If there were, then Sheila's treatment might make her see that it was time to drop her grudges. She could not hold onto them forever.

* * *

Lily could not express frustration on her features, but she was distraught. She sipped more of the soup, willing herself to keep up appearances, but Sheila was putting a good act. Lily quickly saw that confrontation was a good choice. She tried to say something again, and Sheila's monosyllabic answer killed Lily's patience.

"I can't do this. I can't politely try to make peace when I am so rudely treated." Lily indignantly threw her napkins down, prepared to leave.

Sheila smiled to herself; she had expected the other woman to last longer. Her granddaughter had kept her grace and respect until now.

"Forty-seven minutes; that was all you could take of your own treatment." Sheila glanced at the clock and shook her head with a slight trace of disappointment. She looked at the younger woman in front of her. Lily was frowning disapprovingly, and she crossed her arms, obviously baffled by Sheila's words.

The matriarch of the Salvatore clan felt utterly disrespected and words could not express her frustrations. Her eyes were reddening with her growing anger. All she could do was leave this awful situation to preserve a bit of the peace she had reached with Bonnie. They progressed so much, and now she was a bit scared that all of it might be lost because an old woman did not want her to be part of the family, and after she made such an effort to turn this dinner into a success. Frustration and anger slowly turned in strong feeling of pain and inadequacy.

"Excuse me?" Her voice slightly trembled and anger blemished her usual aristocratic tone.

The entire situation left Lily dumbfounded, and it might become worse. She would take the higher road and just leave. She sighed and started to make her way toward the front door.

The situation had reached the peak of frustration Sheila wanted to induce; therefore, she decided that the act could be dropped now.

"Oh, you might not have noticed, but I treated you the exact same way you treated Bonnie since you have made your entrance. It is not as fun when you're on the receiving end," Sheila pointed out.

Lily almost choked at her words _. I could never act in such a manner; I would never go out of my way to belittle someone so much,_ she tried to convince herself, but still the doubt creeped in. She had not been the best version of herself since her arrival, as Bonnie and Damon already pointed, but still she had not realized the extent of her behavior. She assumed it was tolerable because she still cared for Bonnie to some extent at that point of time. The Salvatore woman tried to open her mouth to say something, but the words were not coming easily.

* * *

"Before you can use it as another reason to treat her like a pariah, my grand baby did not ask me to fight her battles. You behaving rudely around a young woman who did her best to be respectful of you just did not sit right with me," Sheila said with a strict expression. She waited for Lily to explain herself.

"I am sure Bonnie did not ask you to do such thing, the young woman is a sweetheart," the brunette woman said with conviction. She had reached a point where she did not try to discredit Bonnie, and she even felt offended that the young woman's grandmother would believe that she would blame Bonnie at every opportunity.

Lily had some self-awareness, but she had not extensively analyzed her relationship with Bonnie. It was a bit confusing, and she could tell now that she cared for the young woman, but not to what extent. She cared enough to try to make this dinner work with Sheila. She cared enough to let her baby boy go. She cared enough not to hold a grudge when the Bennett girl put her in her place. However, did she represent more than Damon's girlfriend and Leila's mother for her?

 _She definitely does if you're ready to put up with her insane grandmother,_ she thought and she calmly returned to her seat. She would try to deescalate the conflict, but she could not let this treatment slide. Respect was everything in a familial relationship, and sadly, part of her wanted to at least have a cordial relationship with Sheila. She wanted to have an invitation extended to her when Leila went shopping with the Bennett Women. Their sense of familial bond so much reminded her of her own, and she did not want Bonnie to resent her.

"She is a lovely girl but I doubt such thing can be said of you. First, I doubt I would have shown such rudeness to someone when they were clearly trying to ameliorate our relationship," Lily tried to detach herself from the accusation whilst she also told Sheila how rude she was. However, the older woman was unfazed and Lily sipped a bit of her soup trying to warm her voice.

"Then you must have not seen yourself cautiously watching Bonnie every time she picked Leila up, and when I tried to mention it to you, the answer I received was unsatisfying. Bonnie is trying to please you because of her family's sake, but I don't have to. You act as if Bonnie is someone usurping some other woman's family. Those side-glances were noticed, even when you tried to hide them under sweet hypocrisy." The elder Bennett continued. She glanced at a Lily turning a bit pale, and Sheila smirked at her when she caught one of her eye.

"I certainly have been a bit harsh to Bonnie, but to compare it to the way you have made me feel unwelcome in your home and your family in matters of minutes is a reach. I would have never made her feel so undesired and why is it that everyone thinks that I blame her for everything Rose did?" Lily amended her first speech.

Sheila stayed away from her need to point that no one mentioned Rose but herself.

"A bit harsh? I have been present in the room for only two of your conversations, and each time she had to compensate for your monosyllabic answers. I have met my fair share of mother-in-law's and they come in three types; the ones who accept their daughters in law as family, the ones that absolutely do not care, and the ones who are in a personal war with their daughters in law," she lifted her hand and at every example she raised a finger.

Lily simply gulped because she felt as if she was Mrs. Salvatore senior, and that was the last woman she wanted to emulate as a mother in law. _So much for claiming that you like the girl_. Her own thoughts started to pick apart her behavior, all those conversations hitting her at once.

* * *

"You, Mrs. Salvatore, purposely chose to isolate and lock her out of your family. You treated her rudely when she was simply trying to welcome you. You clearly fought her for someone else's mistakes. You don't know her well enough to treat her in such a way. Your son is precious to you, but my Bonnie is precious to me. That is the only reason I'm having such conversation with you," Sheila continued.

Emotions overwhelmed Lily. It was her third emotional conversation in the same day on the same topic and she had to figure it out; did she like Bonnie and accept her fully, or would she continue to hurt people with her indecision.

"You might think that there is my family and your family, but in this case you miss the point. Damon and Bonnie have Leila. Leila is family to all of us and that is why I put up with your sons until I could love them, even after one cursed my granddaughter out and the other took away her baby. I am not asking you to love my Bonnie the way I love your sons, but I am demanding you to respect her the way you wished I had respected you for forty-five minutes ago. Now chile, because you're family, I am putting up with your crap, but when it starts being harmful to my grand baby, I don't have patience to…" She could not finish her rant because tears started rolling down Lily's cheeks.

The brunette woman was embarrassed, and with the exhaustion of the entire day, she could no longer hold it.

Lily was as sweet as they came when she considered you family, or even took a liking to you; however, her reaction to Bonnie was contrarian. She took the liking on the girl, but she immediately tried to reject it. After the previous debacle, she could not allow herself to be soft. Damon had forced her to soften to Rose, and she did not want it to happen another time. She felt complicit in the first failure. She should have been as closed as Giuseppe had been. Her son listened to her, so Rose would never have happened.

Now she just felt stupid and she was disappointed with herself for treating Bonnie like shit when she would gladly welcome her as family. She let her paranoia, cowardice, and guilt cloud her judgement. Now she understood why Stefan said the truth often come to the surface around Bennett women, as if they just had a magical charm. Everyone was forced to deal with his or her baggage.

"Oh, now child, there is no need to cry. Now here, there is no need for such." Sheila moved to stand near Lily.

"I am sorry, Ms. Sheila. I'm sorry, I am not one to be emotional, but I guess I am a bit angry," she mumbled, feeling even worse now that Sheila was being so sweet.

"Now you will fix those tears and I will go make a cup of tea for you, and please call me Grams." Sheila left walked quickly to the kitchen, leaving a distressed Mrs. Salvatore.

"Here, now will you tell me why the truth got you so angry?" Sheila put tea in front of Lily, who had recovered from her random outburst.

"You don't believe in giving breaks, but seeing how Bonnie is, that is no surprise." Lily chuckled a bit as she recovered, but her remark made Sheila eye her carefully.

"I did not mean it in any bad way, but now considering my previous behavior, it might come across wrong," the Salvatore woman tried to clear any misunderstanding.

"Okay chile, are we better now with the tears?" Sheila took the seat next to her.

* * *

"I think I just had a long day of being told that I was acting awfully. To quote your words, I have been putting people through a lot of crap. Bonnie scolded me this morning, my son told me I was projecting, and you pretty much told me I was a bitchy mother in law. Now I might have lacked the self-awareness to catch that myself, because I was hiding under the thought that I fairly like Bonnie more than I did Rose, but it seems I have also taken much out on the poor child." Sincerity coating every words, she gave a tentative smile.

"Too much," Sheila agreed but her tone had significantly softened, and it helped Lily feel comfortable enough to engage in a true conversation that they should have had as parents of the fated couple.

"I am glad she told you herself, but I doubt she told you that you made her feel as if she was not part of her own family. Whoever is family to Leila is also family to her and me. Your sons might not have told you, but at the beginning they put her through hell and she put up with them because that was her baby girl's family." Sheila continued to clear every dark corner of this awkward relationship that could have been avoided.

"The same I tried to put up with you because you're my granddaughter's and future daughter in law's family. I am not even sure she wants me to see her in that way. As Salvatores, we want the family to be tight, but it seems I have been pushing my personal agenda. Rose tore apart the family apart, but worse still; she was awful to Leila, and we seem all to carry that baggage," Lily offered, as if it could be enough of an explanation, but the realization fresh on her mind made it hard to approach the subject.

"I am glad to see that you are open to conversation," Sheila said.

"You can add the now, Mrs. Sheila," Lily said teasingly, but it was the truth. She had been close-minded too many days, but they all had their mechanism of defense.

"Call me Grams, and now is better than never, if it means that you will try to be part of this family without everyone forcing you to be," the Bennett woman offered kindly. She could understand being careful after someone damaged your loved one. She had been cautious of Damon just because of what Kol did.

"I think the problem was that I felt left out of the family, and maybe you might understand since I was brought into the dynamics so late."

"You felt like your family was being stolen from you? I felt it the first weeks; Bonnie, she is my baby girl, and then one morning she brings a child out of nowhere. Then the child comes with two men attached. For a long time, it was always her and me. Her mama is out of the picture, and her dad… Well, it was always just her and I. Then suddenly she has this complete family in the side… Leila is blood, so I am not scared, but your sons, particularly Damon, felt like a threat because they could hurt her badly," Sheila revealed what she had not even told Bonnie.

"However, he makes her happy, and that is enough to give the child a chance. When I got to know him, he proved to me that the risk was worth it. It seems to me that sometimes you have to allow family to grow, and that, chile, is something you have to learn. Bonnie doesn't want to come between you and your children. She knows how necessary a mother is, and she would love to have a good relationship with you, but that is up to you," she concluded simply, but she hoped that Lily had just been misguided as Stefan had been before.

"I know that she can't come between me and my sons. I learned that I was doing that myself after talking with Damon. Our Bonnie, I can see her as my own?" Lily carefully asked Sheila. She was still ashamed of her behavior, but the Bennett woman nodded encouragingly.

"Our Bonnie just made him a man that I am proud to call a son, but not so long ago I saw him after his divorce and he was broken. He was spiraling out of control, but staying too long in a bad relationship does that to you. I guess after everything with Rose, I wished he would not let a woman influence his behavior in anyway because he always did that, but tonight I saw that Bonnie was not an influence on his behavior. He was not good because he was with a woman wanting him to be good, he was better because he found maturity and growth," Lily continued talking and processing the impact of a year of love on Damon. She shook her head, surprised that it took so little to be reasonable.

"It is scary to know that your son has a family of his own, but at the same time it is rewarding to know that he has become deserving of such beautiful thing. It sounds selfish because it is, but I did not understand it the first time because I saw him create a family before ,but I chose to ignore that he did it with the wrong woman and at the wrong stage of his life. Damon was partly guilty of that failure. Now he is doing it with the right woman and he is now the right man. She could hurt him, but she makes him happy," Lily quoted Sheila's words, and she sat back in her chaise with her mind finally at ease.

"She teaches something to all of us, and that is why she is family. Because she is the center of Damon's family. She is our Bonnie, your granddaughter, the closest Stefan will get to an adult best friend, Leila's mother, Damon's future wife, and my future daughter, as soon as I apologize," Lily continued talking. Sheila was easy to talk because she was such a great listener.

"She will love to forgive you, but if she talked to you this morning, then she is pretty much over it. However, we can have a better family dinner when I can show you that as I am not as rude to my guest and mostly to the new member of the family." Sheila tried to help ease Lily stress. She knew Bonnie to be very forgiving, and her granddaughter always accepted people with an open heart.

"When I tried to convince my husband Sep to accept Rose as a daughter in law, he asked me why I would want to add her to the family when she was no one to any of us. She was Damon's wife, and that was how we were always going to see her until he opened his eyes. I did not get it until I noticed that I did not care about her enough to blame her for her scandalous behavior. I expected nothing from her because she was nothing to me. For Bonnie, I had impossible expectations from the first second I laid eyes on her because she was family. She is someone to everyone not just because of Damon. It makes it hard to mind my business," she concluded with a sweet smile and she knew that she needed to make that apology.

"Chile, you don't want to be in the middle of your children's love life, trust an old woman. Now I know the first part of the dinner was awful, but we could sit here and try again." Sheila, much like Bonnie, was extremely forgiving and she understood Lily as only another mother could understand.

"I would love to, Grams. Leila has told me about your sweet desserts." Lily felt her discomfort diminish. Not just this night of discomfort, but heavy baggage she had carried with her about her son future and happiness. She could let go of Damon because he could handle his own family, he had his own family, and she was welcome into it.

* * *

Damon woke up a bit early. This morning, there were no knock on his door, and once he threw his hand on the other side to tell Bonnie that there was a miracle, that Leila had not disturbed them, his hand landed on an empty cold spot. Everything came back to him in slow wave of pain, from the argument to her cries, and he knew that he had done incommensurable damage. He grabbed the monitor by his bedside. He could hear Leila's voice, and he knew that she would wake up Bonnie in the next minute if he did not stop her.

Damon stared at the monitor. Last night it had tortured him; almost all night he could hear her crying, and it had taken everything to just listen. However, after she sent him away multiple times, after she lied to him that she was okay and she would stop crying, he had just stopped going to Leila's room. They did not want to wake her up, but they both had barely slept. She cried most of the night, until exhaustion forced her eyes closed, and he slept after his mind stopped finding way to torture him.

He rose tiredly, even though he just wanted to hide in bed. He felt bad because of how he had hurt her just because he loved her, and he had shattered their world before they even built it because the foundation rested on his lies. He made his way toward Leila's room and tried his best to take a neutral expression. Bonnie would not forgive him if he alarmed their daughter, and he knew that he needed forgiveness for too much already. He looked at himself in the mirror used as ornament in their home corridor, he looked every inch of the heartbroken guilty man that he was, and he decided that it was enough to broadcast his mental state.

He passed his hands through his bed hair, disheveling it bit more with his frustrated fingers. It all felt like a nightmare. Like someone had walked into his life and derailed everything, but sadly he was the culprit. He looked again at his puffy eyes and noticed how very red they were. He shook his head; this was only day one of what would be a long ballade in hell. This was surely hell, not because he was suffering, but simply because Bonnie was hurt and he was responsible for those new scars. It only could get worse because he knew that he reopened wounds that he had firstly healed.

 _That fucking Kol Mikealson_. He cursed the young man with passion in his thoughts the entire night. In a fashion unique to him, he first attempted to shift the guilt, but he was no longer that man-child who could not own up to his flaws, and last night was all on him. He stood stupidly in the corridor and started tearing up because he was looking at the situation with new eyes, and he felt almost in a trance.

He understood that he needed a break from the situation, he was never very good with heartache, and he sat in the middle of his corridor. His guilt was oppressive; it started demolishing his wall, and at the end, only the feeling of being the worst stayed. He never wanted Bonnie to be with a man he would consider unworthy of her, even if he were that man.

 _You fucked up, you fucked up big time_. He felt as helpless as a lost child did. The thought in itself caused a deeper wound, but his own thoughts and words were mild blows compared to her broken voice constantly resonating in his mind. The fact that she had no anger but simply unfiltered disappointment was slowly driving him to the edge. Damon's entire world this year was being his daughter's hero and Bonnie's rock. He was more than her rock, he was her everything aside from their daughter, and he always wanted her to keep those proud loving eyes on him. Everything felt too much for him until he could no longer take it and started to break apart in the corridor.

* * *

"Wow." Stefan stopped in the middle of the corridor. He had to clear his eyes and get over his sleepy fogginess. He looked at Damon and the scene in front of him was real. His imminent trip back to Italy had kept him too busy to have few hours in the day to connect with his brother, Bonnie, or anyone else for that matter.

 _What the fuck is going on in this house?_ The thought formed and dissipated at the same speed. Obviously, his brother was in pain and there was only one person that could cause such a reaction from him. _Well, Leila is breathing so second in line is Bonnie_ , he corrected himself and he glanced at Damon, and for a moment, he wondered how to approach the situation. His elder brother seemed almost lethargic and true to Damon level of theatrical expression emotion, he was in the middle of an empty corridor crying.

"You okay?" Stefan took a spot on the ground near his brother, startling Damon who quickly wiped his tears. Damon rolled his eyes, but Stefan could hardly avoid the awkwardness. Thankfully, this past year he had grown more comfortable around his elder brother and they could easily have sincerely emotional conversations. He sighed and did not let Damon's attitude discourage him.

 _Do I look okay to you?_ Damon thought, but he bit his tongue. He could not redirect his frustration toward Stefan even if he really wanted to let go of a bit of the rage. Stefan ignored the little sign of annoyance. He was surprised that Damon did not bite his head off for the stupid question.

Stefan could easily pinpoint the reason of the fall out. When he pictured a harmonious couple, Bonnie and Damon were not the first thing in mind because they bantered every second of the day, even though it was always on the sweetest way. They had mature conflicts and squashed the argument before one walked out of the room. Therefore, if Damon was crying right now, it was big, and only one thing could have caused this scale of damage.

"I guess it went badly, but you needed to tell her the truth. She deserved to know it and Bonnie loves you too much to be hung up on seven year old mistakes." Stefan squeezed Damon shoulder and Damon leaned into his brother's comfort.

"It did not go as badly as I deserved; like you said, Bonnie is forgiving. She did not break up with me, as she should have. I fucked up big time and still I…" He could not continue because it frustrated him more to know that she overlooked most of his deed, and she did not just walk out on him as he deserved. Instead, she gave them time.

 _She still needs time to see the mess that I can be_. His thoughts continued to insinuate the worse, and combined with his self-criticism, it could only end badly.

"How is that a bad thing if she forgave you? It was seven years ago and if she thinks forgiving you is okay, then why would you want to be crucified instead?" confused, Stefan questioned his elder brother. If there was no real problem, why did he want anything else? He looked at Damon, wondering if he was sober, or if there was more to the story.

* * *

"Because I fucked up, but worse, I fucked her up. She cried the entire night, not because she was forced to have a child, but because she trusted me, and I abused her trust. You know Bonnie, she went through so much and she trusted the wrong people. I was not supposed to be one of those wrong people, I was supposed to make sure that she never suffered like that again, and shit." He wiped another tear and looked at his hands.

Once he started to put everything into words, he no longer felt that she forgave him based solely on the love he had for her. He promised her so much more when he courageously took a leap of faith in their relationship. Now, in retrospect, he failed her from day one, and he just could not take it.

"And now she is not angry, she is hurt and every second last night she sobbed just because I didn't do the right thing."

"Damon?" Stefan called him once more because he had that distant look. The younger Salvatore could already put words to his brother's thoughts, and he just wanted to point out that he would do more harm than good thinking that way. "Don't make this a thing where you take the martyr road or what you think is the martyr road. Don't try to make it worse because you are looking for punishment." He insisted on every word, but sadly, he was talking with an unreasonable Damon.

"You know, I already knew that I didn't deserve her. It was clear that she was too good for me, but at least I could proudly say that I made her happy," Damon said as a plaintive cry, and he stopped to regain some control over his shaking voice. He was digging every skeleton and everything that could help him come to peace with the choice he needed to make. Last night listening to her cry had wrecked him in unimaginable ways.

"After last night, I can't even hide behind how happy I make her. She was crying, and I was begging her not to break up with me. I was being selfish again. I fucked up and she is the one suffering the most. I had to spend the entire night listening to her cry, and I did that to her. I promised her that I'd be the opposite of that asshole, but I did the same thing he did. I lied to her, I manipulated her, and now I broke her into million pieces. She cried in Leila's room. Do you have any idea how heartbroken she had to be for her to take that risk? I broke her so much that only her child could console her," he said pitifully and he shook his head as if it would push that horrible memory away.

Nothing could make Bonnie and he cry around Leila. _At least I thought, but I did it. I made her do something that she will blame herself for, and it keeps getting worst._ He was going through a range of emotion, and with every new shade of emotions, he was sinking deeper in the darkest corner of his mind.

"I did that to my baby, the entire night she cried and she was not angry. She was hurt and disappointed. She cried hugging our little daughter because I stripped her of everything else with my lie. Not only her boyfriend, but also her best friend. I went in because it hurt too much to listen helplessly to those cries, and I just made it worse. She fucking stopped crying because she did not want to hurt me. I get to be hurt, and she has that right to hurt me." That entire night was extremely rough on him. Right now, he was frantic, and his thoughts were confusing him but Stefan silently listened to every words.

"I hurt her and I get to suffer but she won't even let that happen. I begged her to stay and I am sure she did it because she did not want to hurt me. I don't want that for her, I don't want her crying at night, and I can't even… I fucked up. She is better without me if it makes her suffer like this to be with me…" He said with conviction and Stefan decided to put an end to this misguided interpretation of the situation.

* * *

"So your plan to fix everything is to…" The younger Salvatore decided to be careful with the way he wanted to approach the situation.

He hated to deal with this volatile Damon, this immature Damon who chose the easy way out. Even worse, the one that chose to complicate a bad situation and turn it chaotic. From where Stefan stood, Damon and Bonnie could use the situation to redefine the base of an already solid relationship. This was not the hardest conflict to resolve, but it was a great way to prove if they were mature enough to deserve their love.

"I just don't want her to suffer, I fucked her up and she was…" He was exhausted. Everything he was telling Stefan he went through a thousand time, and now he just wanted a resolution.

"Day, yes you fucked up, but I doubt the answer would be to hurt her more because you can't stand tears and guilt. Because let's face it, you look a mess, you're already thinking cowardly…" Damon was ready to jump back on the conversation to defend himself but Stefan lifted his hand. He had listened to the plaintive complaint and now Damon needed to listen.

"Don't. I know you and the attempt to nobility is a misguided way of dealing with your pain. I also know Bonnie; she did not stay to make you feel better. She stayed because she is not a coward; when there is a problem, she deals with it. We have been through this before but this time you can't play those games because if you run away she won't give you a second chance," Stefan pointed out the truth, Damon could not have argued had he been in full possession of his faculties, but the young man had gone through a long, painful night.

"You look a mess, sitting in a corridor crying, so you're definitely hurt beyond I have ever seen you been hurt. You don't just give up in the first obstacle and I appreciate the noble thoughts that you should break up to protect her from toxicity. Every other day you're trash, but you're far from being abusive, so stop comparing yourself to her ex." Stefan squeezed Damon's shoulder and he shook his head at the thought that Damon took it as far as to compare himself to Kol Mikealson.

"Now I am snitching on my friend, but bro before hoe, you're the hoe by the way, but Bonnie loves you for very reasonable reasons in a very unreasonable way. When you try your best, you make her a better person, and you try very hard when it comes to her. Harder than I have known you to try. You want to hide behind nobility because you're scared that she might eventually leave you now that she has seen that imperfect side of you but newsflash, she has seen ugly and selfish Damon. Your first meetings were not exactly sweet and still she let you befriend her. Maybe you're scared that you might not be able to fix what you did, so why not self-sabotage." Stefan was reading him like an open book, and it brought all his fragility to the surface.

"She will have all the reason to do so. Bonnie, she is so perfect, and I have been with a lot of woman but I never felt inadequate for any of them until her. Then I found a way to be the man she needed. I was perfect for her, but even to be at her level I had to hide some truth. The man I am, she will wake up soon enough and leave. Lies kept us together." Damon countered Stefan argument with more of his self-doubts.

* * *

"You sound dumb. Did you ever tell Bonnie that you felt like this? Or where you just trying to fit some image? The closest you have been to yourself in the past twelve years was this year around Bonnie. She gets the best version of you without asking. You have a past, you made mistakes, but you promised her something. You are yourself with her, not that lie you portrayed for years, and she gets to do the same. Can you stop being scared and give her the truth she deserves? She does not deserve to be victim of a lie you tell yourself." Stefan kept a strict tone and to have such exhausting conversation early in the morning tested his patience.

"I can't just lose her, and worse, if I do so after putting her in worse pain after trying to fix this mess. I love her, if she feels the pressure to stay because of Leila. I lied to her once, and my reason was that I love her. What would stop me from using Leila? I am scared because I know that if I start losing her, I will panic and I might hurt her worse than I did last night. I can't live with this. It was nonstop for hours and she had to stop every time Leila woke up. If I can do this to her …" he shook his head again defeated, even if he was aware that Stefan was right he could just not take risk.

"So your solution will be to inflict a clean wound? Let's be realistic Damon; you break up or give her up, then she moves on after crying and suffering for months. Then you happily start co-parenting but you're still in love and she is still in love with you, but she's Bonnie…" Stefan glanced at his brother and the frown on Damon's face would be comical if the situation were not so serious.

"Pretty, intelligent, sexy Bonnie, so she finds a new man to fill your empty spot because she needs to remind herself that she has to survive without the love her life. By the way, since I am snitching, that is what you are to her: the love of her life. She goes through some unhappy years, not loved the way that she deserves to be loved because she settled." He continued that tale and Damon does not like the sound of it, but at least he is listening with open ears and a focused mind.

"So much for not hurting her, and I don't even want to imagine you two months after you stupidly break up with her. You're already having a breakdown in the corridor while your daughter and girlfriend are in the room next door. I give you ten months before you try to break her hypothetical marriage. You would have wasted everyone's time. I get it that you messed up, but give Bonnie some credit. She can read through your bullshits better than anyone can, and if she wants you to fix what you broke, then you will. Now can you actually focused on what you need rather than this heroic fantasy?" Stefan looked at Damon. His brother had now a new expression, and it was better than the previous one

"If you break up with her, I might be the shoulder she cries on, and I don't want my wife cheating with my big brother," Stefan joked because he can noticed the sudden change in the atmosphere.

"That is a fucked up pep talk, Stefan." Damon nudged him, but he still let out a small chuckle.

"Yep, but it got you together. Seriously, though, fix it, because you're lucky enough to have her love you unconditionally and you love her too. Handle this and whatever is broken you can fix it."

"I will, Stefano, and thanks for talking some sense into me. It's just that hurting her is the worst thing I've ever done in my life," Damon tried to explain his previous breakdown

"You stopped me from realizing my dream." Stefan jokingly reminded him.

"And I apologized for it but look at you now. However, seriously I am now so scared to hurt her, I don't want this feeling ever again, and I don't ever want to be the cause of her tears," the older Salvatore brother insisted and he was almost preaching to himself.

"Then make sure it never happens again. Now, can we leave this place, because we look ridiculous," Stefan chuckled, he stood up from the floor, and then he helped Damon up.

The brunette man quickly wrapped Stefan in a hug; he felt thankful for his brooding brother, and to think that just month ago the same Stefan had tried to stop him from dating Bonnie.

"I am glad we can have this type of conversation after what I put us through." Damon broke the hug and he glanced at Leila's room. He wanted to start on fixing what he did wrong, and he would not waste time.

"Thank Leila, Bonnie and yourself for this. Just proof than when you try, you can fix your mistakes, Day," Stefan pressed again

"Love you, Stefanito," Damon said as he walked toward Leila's room. Stefan laughed because he had not been called Stefanito since he was seven years old.

"Love you too, bro, but now you're overdoing it. It is too damn early to have multiple emotional conversations," he laughed it off and he walked to the kitchen.

* * *

"Baby, let your mommy sleep." Damon picked Leila up from the bed and he carefully put her on the ground. He looked at Bonnie's petite frame hidden between bed sheets.

"But daddy," Leila started to pout. She was already trying to climb back on her bed, and Damon quickly stopped her. He lifted her and kept the little girl in his arms just to make sure she stayed put.

"Your mom needs to sleep," the Salvatore man added firmly, but Leila was not ready to give up so easily when they had a family routine. No one stayed asleep when she was awake, therefore she attempted a new approach, and she wanted Damon to hear reason.

"But it is time and she will miss breakfast," Leila insisted with the same tone Damon used and she tried to imitate his expression to show that she was serious too.

"Mommy is not feeling good, so why don't you just give her few more hours of sleep and then I will make breakfast for her," Damon tried to convince her and she stopped moving. She carefully inspected Bonnie and she looked worried. Damon began regretting the way he formulated the situation.

"But you can't cook and if she is sick it will be worse. Can I stay with mommy until she feels better?" Leila sounded even more worried after he suggested cooking. Damon did not know if he wanted to laugh at the statement or be vexed by how his daughter always dismissed his cooking skills. However, he could not cook and she was right on that point. He ruffled her head and she laughed joyfully. Damon stopped before it became a disturbance for Bonnie.

"Then you will miss your breakfast and we can't have that; your mother will have my head." He put her back on the floor and she was already walking back to her bed.

"But mommy is sick. She always stays with me when I am sick and she is not having breakfast," she countered, trying to use a comparison as ultimate proof of reason. She started to climb back on her bed but Damon put her back down.

"You do have a good point, but what if you do something that will make her happy? Uncle Stefan is cooking breakfast and you could help him and make something special for Bonbon, and then you can bring it to her and spend the day in bed with her." He agreed just to pacify his stubborn daughter.

"Uncle Stefan… Uncle Stefan daddy said…" she started shouting as if the sound of her voice would reach Stefan on the lower floor. She ran back to kiss Bonnie forehead and to make sure that she was not to sick, and then she started to shout Stefan's name again.

"Leila, you will wake her up, and there will be no good surprise," Damon sighed and she stopped

"Sorry, I will be back," she whispered, and Damon just shook his head.

"Don't ru…" But she was already sprinting out of the room. Damon had almost forgotten how hard it was to raise a young child.

"You did not have to chase her away; she already woke me up. I will go and fix the breakfast." Damon leaned closer to the bed to see Bonnie better. Her voice was hoarse and she was hardly audible. Before he could offer any answer, her arms were around his neck and she was kissing him as she did every other morning. She was so sleepy that she had not yet recalled the memories of last night and even now, the kiss was just matter of habit that would require time to lose.

"Sorry, I did not mean to kiss you." She quickly let him go and it felt so weird. She decided to use the extra hour of sleep he got her after negotiating with Leila. Bonnie was not ready to face this day; she was unprepared for this unexpected predicament.

"I woke up also forgetting that we weren't in the best of place together," Damon supplied as he recalled how he looked for her this morning.

"It is a way to see it," Bonnie agreed with him and they both already knew that they could not be silent together. Already, barely talking was too painful and they wanted to go back to their old habits.

"Can we talk?" Damon asked softly, and all Bonnie did to answer was to move aside to make space for him.

* * *

"Tell me now that you have made yourself comfortable and almost pushed me out of Leila's bed." She was almost falling of Leila small bed and Damon just continued pushing her further toward the edges.

"You could just climb on top of me and you know," he said, once again forgetting that they were not Bonnie and Damon of yesterday. There was the weight of new revelations between them. So much needed to be considered.

"Damon," she chastised him with a teasing tone, but it sounded cutting to him as he became aware that she was not in the same feeling toward him.

"Sorry, I keep forgetting, which makes it worse because I must give you the impression that I am not taking it seriously," He amended, reminding them both of their situation.

She sighed quietly and frowned a bit, putting as much space between them as the bed allowed.

"Babe, I was scolding you because this is Leila's room and my thoughts were more aligned with yours, so I keep forgetting too. I am so used to us being us, but we are no longer us or us may not just feel the same. So, what did you want to tell me?" she said regretfully, and he caught that glimpse of disappointment again.

"A bit of everything, but more than anything, I want to understand why you think time can fix the situation. I slept thinking about everything you said and I think I love you too much to see you stay if you don't want to. At the same time, I don't want to let you go and I feel like yesterday I manipulated you into staying, doing the same thing as your ex," he attempted to speak and his heart sped at his first words.

"Damon, I know that I have no blame in what you did. I am not punishing myself by giving us some time. I am doing this for me, only me. I don't want to lose you even if I am disappointed with you and angry that our relationship did not have the foundations I thought it had. Yes, you lied, or omitted the truth, but I want to believe that it was not completely a lie. I can't fully trust you, but I don't want to be away from my family. I want us to work this out and heal as we always do," she replied with as much sincerity as she could muster and truthfully, she was still processing everything. Anger was the last thing she wanted to feel and disappointment was already a heavy emotion.

"It is not your place to fix a mess that I created. Bonnie, don't try to make it easy for me just because you're worried about Leila. She is your daughter I won't try to use her against you and if you want to leave, the family is still your family. I would like for you to be angry because you have every right to be angry. I don't want you to suppress it," he reminded her of the reality of their situation.

* * *

"Babe… sorry, I forget every time. You want to know why I can't believe that we're in this position?" her voice carried her incredulity. He looked at her profile and he related to her feeling.

"Because we did everything possible to avoid such things. I don't lie to you and you don't lie to me. I get to be angry until I say my peace and you get to be angry until you say your peace," he supplied as a possible explanation on why this conflict seemed impossible to both of them. They worked in ways that glued them together and now they were ripped apart because Damon did not stick to their policy.

"But this is not about being angry. It is about being disappointed and slightly betrayed, and I am not trying to make you happy. If I was, I would give you anger and make it easy for you. I am showing you my feelings the way they are and telling you to fix it," she emphasized and she pointed out why he wanted her angry.

He nodded at everything she said because he had concluded that he had a harder time processing soft emotions. Damon already understood everything she said and that motivated him to come a decision. He was not fond of it, but she was worth the risk.

"Then will you break up with me? Actually, I am not asking but I am breaking up with you," he said firmly and Bonnie's expression broke.

She hardly could breathe and she did not know what she wanted to say now. She just pushed herself further in the bed sheets and she hoped that it would be enough to make her forget everything, but he entered the bed sheets and placed himself right in front of her.

"Damon…" she warned him.


	24. Chapter 24

_**It took an eternity but here the new update. Thank you for the reviews, follows and adding to your favorite.**_

 _ **I don't own the vampire diaries.**_

 _ **A big thank you to isawyouasaperson for always checking and editing my chapters.**_

* * *

 _ **Please review**_

* * *

"Then will you break up with me? Actually, I am not asking but I am breaking up with you," he said firmly and Bonnie's expression broke.

She could hardly breathe and she did not know what to say. She just pushed herself further into the bed sheets and hoped it would be enough to make her forget everything, but he entered the sheets and placed himself in front of her. He wanted to explain to her why it needed to happen.

"Damon…" she warned him. Bonnie had expected every variation of an apology, but she hadn't expected this.

She looked at him with a mix of confusion and disappointment, swallowing hard with no intent of pursuing this conversation. She believed him capable of finding his way out of his mistake, but he was being true to character. She could fight him and make him see reason, but she was too tired, so she chose to remain silent.

"Shut up for a second and let me explain myself," Damon said with conviction. He looked at Bonnie who was still hiding below the sheets. The situation was ridiculous, and he felt tempted to laugh. He took a deep breath to calm himself and then he continued what he was about to say, "I am terminating this relationship…"

"Damon, saying it with different words doesn't change the meaning of what you just said! While I am investing myself, your first move is to run and just give up..." she pushed the sheets away with anger as she quickly interrupted him.

Bonnie stood and was ready to leave the room. She could tolerate a certain amount of nonsense, but he was being entirely ridiculous. She looked at him intensely and wondered if there were even a point in fighting. After a few seconds, she decided that she could not be the adult for both of them. She started to walk away and that dragged Damon from his stupor.

"Bonnie… Bonnie … babe," He shouted in panic and quickly left the bed to join her, but she was practically running.

Damon pressed his steps and he finally caught her by the arm, and he pulled her about by the arm.

Bonnie looked at him, trying to reign in her temper. She could hear Leila and Stefan having a conversation downstairs, something about waffles or pancakes. She drew a deep breath attempting to calm herself. Just looking at him was enough to infuriate her.

"Don't call me 'babe', what is wrong with you? You know what, I am not begging you. Go ahead and mess everything up," she hissed and aggressively pulled her arm away, almost causing her shoulder to dislocate. She winced but she continued taking a step back when Damon tried to get closer.

"Don't even try, just do your thing. I just keep being disappointed." Bonnie raised a hand in the air when she noticed Damon's sudden attempts to comfort her. She continued her way without paying him no mind. She preferred being close to her daughter when she was frustrated.

* * *

"You should really learn to listen," he said softly when he finally caught up with her again.

With swift motion, he restrained her and threw her over his shoulder as if she was as light as a dry autumn leaf. She tried to break out of his hold but it was pointless. He quickly walked them back into what could be considered their room but was mostly his room. He carefully put her down and locked the door to avoid interruptions. He raised his eyes to meet her angry gaze; she had her arm crossed, and he could feel the words burning her tongue until she freed her rage.

"You're trying to break up with me for something you did! The audacity! Was last night not enough? What happened to begging so we could make it work?" she was furious and her usual peaceful eyes had hardened with anger. She moved away from the door and sat on his bed. Her head was heavy and tears of frustrations started falling.

Damon looked at her, lost on what to do because this was the last thing he wanted. He had everything figured out in his head, but there was a problem in the delivery. He went to sit by her side and placed his arm on her shoulder, dragging her into an embrace. He kissed the crown of her head while she melted into tears.

"Bonnie… Bonnie… breathe, babe stop crying. Can you just listen to me?" he pleaded with her while he forced her to look at him and wiped away her tears.

"Here, are you okay now?" he inquired when the whimpering eventually ceased and she nodded.

He kissed her forehead and Bonnie bit her tongue not to explode in another fit of tears or maybe one of anger.

"I am sorry, I did not mean it like that... I really did not mean it like that," he repeated several times to calm her down.

He grabbed her chin softly and kissed her, surprising and confusing her.

"Is there another way to present a break up?" she groaned against his chest while she struggled to stop crying.

"You pointed out something last night and it tormented me all night," he started while she moved away from him, no longer crying.

She sat in the middle of his gigantic California king bed, appearing smaller than he ever remembered, and at that moment, Damon knew what words he wanted to use. For a second, he hesitated with going through his plan.

"You hid nothing from me and you gave me all of you. Whatever darkness I pried on or the good that I cherished. However, I was too much of a coward to have the courtesy to do the same. You know me to the extent I want you to know me, and it is unfair that I get to love all of you when you have to be content with bits of me. When I said I wanted a break up, I just meant that I wanted the one sided relationship to end," he took a break to look at her and she was staring at him too. He drew a deep breath and continued his emotional monologue.

"I just want to restart the entire thing so you have the amazing chance that I experience every day; to be in love with a person who hides nothing from me. I don't want to salvage this relationship because you no longer trust the foundation, but I want to build new foundations. I want to break up with you so I can be with you on better foundation," he finished and Bonnie looked at him as if he was a lunatic, but still smiled softly. Still, Damon was trying to gauge her anger.

* * *

"You're breaking up with me so you can try to win me over? You're an idiot, Damianio," she said in a taunting tone that let Damon relax.

He closed the distance between them and he hugged her for dear life. They were both silent and savoring a sudden peace brought by their embrace.

"You make it sound stupid, but it's not stupid," Damon said after a long pause. They were already falling back into old habits that couldn't be broken.

He poked her and helped her lay on his side. She glared at him and bit her tongue, trying to hold back sassy remarks, but it felt impossible.

The way her eyes brightened with malice, and Damon kissed her, trying to keep her cheeky remarks silent. She kissed him back with softness, as if she was trying to amend her fault and his fault with a message behind such tenderness.

"Simplifying that long monologue makes it sound stupid because it is stupid." Her tone carried no malice, and Damon was used to her friendly bluntness. He smiled to himself, thinking that in a matter of minutes, he gained back his best friend. He felt that was a part of her that he neglected as he focused on being the perfect boyfriend.

"Could you not simply go for mind-blowing sex like anyone with a functioning brain?" She continued talking, oblivious to the adoring way he was looking at her.

When eventually she turned to face him, he had his eyebrow cocked in a teasing manner, and he settled her on top of him. He kissed her once more, just to let her know that he was still there, still trying. The kiss was tentative, both of them unsure what their relationship would become.

"Don't project your low standards on me; I'm just trying to give the best to my lady," he countered when he broke the kiss, making her giggle.

"You just insulted yourself; my low standards are the reason I'm dating you," she threw at his face victoriously, laughing as he nudged her in consternation.

Damon stared at her until she wiped away the last tears.

"I'm not breaking up with you just because you feel the need to prove yourself. We can use room for improvement, but we don't need a new relationship for that. We're not a pair of adolescents trying until we get the perfect picture. Our relationship has flaws, but that's where the beauty of it is. I surely over reacted yesterday, but it was a lot to take in, and apparently, a good cry was enough to sooth the ache. I'm not telling you that all is forgiven or forgotten, but I'm not expecting grand gestures or lengthy apologies." She kissed his nose and then his cheek, before sitting up.

"I just want you to be true to yourself and true to us. I know that it isn't easy, but give me credit and start believing that I'm not eager to date perfection. Damon, you're far from perfect and so I am. The only difference is that I have no shame in being flawed because as imperfect as I am, that does not stop me from making you happy." She placed her hand in his hair as he had moved his head to her lap.

 **...**

 **...**

 **...**

Damon looked at her and once again struggled to find the right words. He wanted to tell her about his selfishness, even as his heart had exploded with joy. The perfect picture that he worked on every day disintegrated. She could see past it, and she had seen him even when he did his best to hide his dark past. He could just submit and bare the truth at her feet.

"I don't deserve you and I am scared. I might hurt you again. I started being afraid to lose you the moment you gave me a chance, so I tried to match some standard that I think you put on me. Most of the time, I look at you in awe, making me ask what you see in me? What happens if you cheat on me because I can't keep you happy?" he felt a rancid taste on his tongue. Saying those words cost him so much.

"I see you, you make me happy, and I love you just enough not to be blind to your flaws. I spend hours arguing with you because I can't stand you, but I spend my nights by your side for the same reason: I can't stand you. I also happen to adore you. I am with you because you're you." She kissed him tenderly, with all the love she could gather, and whispered her love and her ode to him against his lips.

"Selfish, slightly manipulative, with an awful ego, reckless and I could make a list, but still the way your work through all those flaws to keep me happy is enough to make me love you. I don't have to look at your redeeming qualities because I am perfectly happy with a flawed man. Yesterday, I over reacted because it was the first time that your decision had a negative impact on me. It was a bit hypocritical on my part because your selfishness does not bother me when it makes you protect our love," she said with so much conviction that Damon relaxed over his own embarrassing confession.

The young man felt the heaviness on his heart and his mind lift. He smiled at her brightly through teary eyes. He was never one to explore emotional distress, even if he was an overly emotional being. He could only be so open with one person, she would not judge his fear, and eventually Bonnie would try to help him rationalize those fears.

"It gets worse; sometimes I want to sabotage us so I get to say 'at least she did not abandon me,' but most of the time I love you enough to silence those fears and thoughts. Even after trying so much not to disappoint you, I still hurt you…" He continued hesitantly but she smiled encouragingly while she smoothed his hair to remind him that he would always find comfort with her.

"I will hurt you too. Do I get scared over it? Sometimes yes, but most of the time I remind myself that for every mistake I will make, I will give everything to turn that hurt in a smile and later on an experience and a lesson to try and do better for both our sake. I'm not perfect, and you're an idiot to think that I am, just because you love me." She kissed him one more time with the same amount of love.

"I love you," he said as he closed his eyes and enjoyed her fingers caressing his scalp as she ran her hand through his soft black hair.

"I'm aware," she replied cockily and pecked his lips. They stayed almost glued to each other until Leila broke the moment by shouting their names. Bonnie was the first one to break into another happy laugh and she ran toward the door.

"Here!" the little brunette woman shouted and she smiled at the precious image of her small baby girl struggling with a breakfast tray.

"For you," Leila said, proud of her effort and Bonnie kissed her head as a thank you.

* * *

"Thank you!" Bonnie wrapped her arms around Stefan and she dropped a kiss on his cheek after putting a cup of warm Ethiopian coffee in front of him.

The young man simply smiled and sipped from his delicious brewage. He knew what he was being thanked for, but he could tell Bonnie that he partly did it for the sake of his niece and himself. Stefan could hardly picture being in the center of a conflict between his brother and the woman he had become inclined to call a sister.

"So I guess Damon did not act as dumbly as he would normally?" he asked, and Bonnie simply smiled behind her cup of coffee.

"He was just slightly dumb," she answered with a smile and she grabbed the little cupcake Stefan pushed toward her. She smiled at his attempt to comfort her.

"Pity, I could have been your shoulder to cry on and you still would have been Mrs. Salvatore," he joked around as Damon entered in the kitchen.

The elder Salvatore walked in on a scene that he was extremely familiar with; his brother and girlfriend had their incomprehensible friendship, never inappropriate, and sort of cute. He just glared at Stefan in mocking manner, placing a kiss on Bonnie's cheek. Damon took a sip from her coffee and finished the cupcake that he snatched from her fingers, gaining himself a murderous glare, but he smirked innocently and raised his hands to announce peaceful intent.

"Considering that you're the one managing the family fortune, it's a pity. Leila would lack of nothing and I would be bathing in gold," Bonnie answered Stefan through chuckles.

"I have put up with this friendship too long. Can you go back to the time when you barely said hi to each other and stop this disgusting amount of affection?" Damon sighed and completely appropriated Bonnie's coffee mug as his own. She sighed at her turn and went to pick another one. When she filled it, Damon conveniently chose to take that one, Bonnie simply rolled her eyes at him as she took back her old mug.

"And make you a happy man?" Bonnie asked with a curious tone wrapped in mischievous laughter. She smiled at Stefan and the younger Salvatore shared the same glint in his eyes.

"Your displeasure is the glue of this relationship," Stefan added, and they both started laughing as Damon rolled his eyes.

* * *

"Do you have everything ready for tonight? Your luggage? And apparently, you're having lunch with Sheila and Lily. Mama just called to ask if you were free." Damon wanted to ensure that her trip to New York would be perfect.

Bonnie nodded to most of his question.

"I can make space for it, just need to shorten the dance session with Leila, so 3p.m. we can meet here," the petite woman said as she tightly locked her hair in a chignon and she straightened her ballerina outfit. She was less uncomfortable around Lily and she assumed that a lunch would be the perfect time to cement their relationship.

"Okay, I will confirm it then." Damon quickly sent a confirmation to Sheila and his mother, and then he refocused his attention on Bonnie who was looking around the kitchen.

"By the way where is Leila?" she eventually sighed after looking at her watch.

"looking for her ballerina shoes, lost them for the hundredth time. One day I will make that daughter of yours sit and have a long conversation about how to keep her belongings safe." He rolled his eyes after the statement; it was common occurrence to be late because Leila could not find her shoes or her toys.

"She did not lose them, she abandoned them in our room," Bonnie corrected him, but it led to another eye roll and a question floating in his blue eyes; _And who should we blame for almost letting her move in our room?_

She brushed his thoughts off with a raised hand before he could use words, but the eye contact was enough.

He shrugged his shoulders to tell her that he was just thinking the truth.

"Then I should have a long conversation about her joining this club." He pointed toward Stefan's head, gaining the young man attention.

"Can I be kept out of this conversation and what club?" the younger Salvatore sighed, but put his phone on the kitchen counter.

"Keeping Damon from getting any when his loving girlfriend is willing club. Actually, you should attend that talk too," he said smugly and then he pointed at the other two people in the room with him.

"Damon…" Bonnie slapped his shoulder, but he just wiggled his eyebrows and smirked. It was enough to make Bonnie roll her eyes and sighed.

"I'm serious," He continued unapologetically

"I should be saving for her therapy," Bonnie said theatrically, "I have to go get her shoes so we can leave. I love you and see you later Stefan."

* * *

He had seen her leave the building, but he was not fast enough to stop her. By the time he made it to her side of the pavement, she had entered an expensive car, and it drove away. Kol watched the Mercedes drive off, and the anger which refused to leave him the past days roared loudly, causing him to kick a trash bin.

 _She is living the rich life that we could not have together_. The thought was bitter and the fury it left behind was putrid. After waiting for almost two hours on the road in front of that expensive building, he had finally seen her, but she looked happy, and she was still with that thing, her daughter. He has not told her. He tried to reassure himself; if she was still happy, then the Salvatore bastard said nothing and kept his dirty little secret.

 _I will tell her and bust her perfect bubble._ He thought excitedly as he tried to find a way to enter the building where she lived. He could not eternally wait for her in the streets. He eventually succeeded when a pair left the building and he quickly slid in. He did not waste time scanning the place because he did it yesterday. He walked to the lobby and sat on one of the soft, plush sofa.

 _Expensive,_ the word hardly left his mind. His office screamed money, his home smelled like money, and clearly Damon Salvatore threw it in Bonnie's direction. If not, how could he explain the change in her? She was no longer frail, her hair was silky, and she looked more beautiful than he remembered. _That shit hurts, he gets to have her best version._ His anger boiled to the surface.

He crossed his legs and sat quietly, adamant on the success of his enterprise. He would make Damon Salvatore pay and Bonnie's unhappiness would be an extra benefit. He should have just paid when I asked politely. He waited for maybe an hour and a half until he saw a head full of curls make its way back inside the building.

She really looked different; she traded the silk straight hair of her adolescence with beautifully defined curls, she was curvier, and she was smiling. The smile got to him more than any other change. He cleared his throat and he called for her when she passed the sofa where he was sitting, but all her attention was focused on the babbling thing.

 **...**

 **...**

 **...**

"Bonnie?" he called and she stopped for a second. He waited for her to turn, but she did not.

Bonnie had recognized his voice, it was not something she could forget even with the years; that voice delivered too many horrible words. She heard him loud and clear, but she chose to ignore him, rushing on.

"Bonnie…Bon… BONNIE!" he shouted with exasperation. He did not care about the attention he might attract.

Her daughter turned to look at him and she tapped on Bonnie's leg, trying to get her mother's attention. Kol took advantage of the opportunity she presented as she stopped to speak with _the thing_. He ran and blocked her path.

Bonnie rose and stood straight. Her grip on Leila tightened without being painful and with the calmest attitude; she looked straight into Kol's eyes.

"Stay away from me," she hissed and her hold on Leila became iron clad, causing Kol's vicious eyes to stray to the little girl. Ist was so intense that Leila shrunk back hid her face against her mother's leg.

"Why would I do that?" he answered smugly as he edged closer to Leila.

Bonnie stepped in front her daughter and gave him a warning glare. He stood his ground and she felt utter disgust just facing the man who made her youth hell, between stalking and terrorizing her the past years.

"If I see you lurking around me or my family, I swear Kol…" she stopped herself, reminded of the little child by her side. She glanced at Leila who did not dare to look up.

"What are you going to do? Some rounds under the sheet with the son of an Italian mobster and you think that now you can threaten people? Harshness does not suit you, though the little girl act doesn't suit you, hell everything surrounding you doesn't suit you. Did you have to change yourself to be loved? Poor Bonnie cannot be loved as herself?" He extended his arm to touch her cheek, but with a swift motion, she slapped his hand away.

"I won't repeat myself or even entertain your immaturity. Stay away from me and my family," she said calmly and tried to move, but he blocked her path one more time.

"What family? Damon Salvatore and the twenty thousand euro thing?" He pointed at Leila with disdain, and Bonnie forced herself to remain in control.

"Do you know what your lover was up to? You see Bonnie, I am here because I am trying to protect you," he said with a victorious smile.

"From what, a seven year contract… I'm grateful he did what he needed to do to protect our child from people like you." She looked at him and the mix of emotions in her eyes hurt him more than he thought anything could have.

"Stay away from me, my daughter, and Damon. Stay away from my family." She pushed past him angrily

"What are you going to do to keep me away from your daughter?" He reached for Leila and patted her curls, twisting them as Leila let out a scared cry.

Bonnie lost it at that moment and she slapped him hard across the face. She quickly pushed Leila behind her and glared at Kol with eyes tearing in fury. If she could have murdered him at that instant, she would have, just for the way he was staring at her daughter. She slapped him a second time just for good measure, but the young man seemed unbothered and he even smiled with extreme assurance.

"If you ever come close to her, your family will be mourning your name," she refused to threaten him with words that Leila could understand, and she already felt guilty for using violence in front of her. However, she made sure he could see the promise of doom in her eyes while she stood toe to toe with him.

"As if I care about the threats of a scarred little girl. Does she know what her precious mom did?" He tried to get another reaction but Bonnie stubbornly walked away without saying a thing or looking back. She eventually stopped in front of the elevator and she agitatedly waited for her lift. She practically ran inside as she searched for a bit of safety.

* * *

"I'm so sorry baby…" she apologized as she had been doing for the entire elevator ride and tightened her arms around Leila. Bonnie was still shaking from the aftermath of the confrontation. She heard the threat loud and clear, and that monster was coming to hurt her daughter.

"Mommy is so sorry… I'm so sorry." Her voice was turning raspy because of the building tears, and her adrenaline refused to diminish. She could not believe that Kol had dared to touch her daughter.

Bonnie felt guilty on top of being scared; her past was catching up with her, and she stupidly thought she was above her youth's mistakes. She kissed the crown of Leila's head and tried to calm down. She could feel the panic transfer its effect to her daughter. The little girl was continually crying for her, but the emotions making their way in Bonnie's brain were strong.

"Mommy…mama." It was the first time that she switched from mommy to the more intimate mama that she reserved for Rose, but the wave of anxiety emanating from Bonnie must have shifted something to the little girl as she battled her own tears and tried to comfort her mother.

She started patting Bonnie's back and making circles the same way the petite woman was doing. It was all too much for Bonnie, she just had the strength to open the door of the house and keep her tears at bay for few more seconds. She found Lily and Sheila sharing a conversation on the living room's couch. Her eyes frantically looked for Damon, but she was happy to find the women in the living room. She was in no state to take care of Leila, she was trying to stay in control, but she knew Kol well enough to know he was serious about hurting her baby girl.

Bonnie walked to her grandmother and her mother in law. She carefully tried to sit Leila between them but the little girl refused to budge. The Bennett woman took a deep breath and she tried to sort her thoughts. GET A GRIP! She shouted to herself and she was calm enough to pull a façade in front of Leila.

"Baby I am fine, I need you just to spend few minutes with Grams and Nonna," She looked pleadingly at both women; trying to convey her anguish without stressing her daughter.

Both women understood and they joined in soothing the young child. It took few minutes, but she reluctantly accepted. Lily caught her and she looked at Bonnie with worried eyes. The young woman just tried a warry smile and thanked them.

"Damon is in the kitchen," Sheila offered before she could ask.

Bonnie almost bolted out the room, frantically rushing toward the kitchen, and rushed into his arm.

Damon caught her in his arms but he was confused, lost when she started sobbing against his chest. He started drawing circles against her back until she calmed down.

"He threatened her…" she whispered against his shirt and she almost choked on the sentence. "He is going to hurt her… he was waiting for us downstairs… and he told Damon, he told me…" Damon had a clear idea on who the 'he' was. He looked at a sobbing Bonnie and did not need to hear more.

"I will take care of this." He broke their embrace and he carefully moved her to the side before striding out of the room before she could do anything to stop him.

"Damon… Damon…Damon!" Bonnie started running after him, but he was already leaving through the main door, burning with fury.

"Bambino?" Lily shouted at him in panic and it startled Leila, who once again melted into tears.

"Mama… mama…mama." She extended her arm toward Bonnie and left Sheila's protective arms. She collided with Bonnie's knees and it was enough to force the petite woman to regain some calm. Bonnie lifted the little girl and she settled her on her waist, letting her sob on her shoulder as she whispered comfort.

"What's going on?" Sheila powerful voice resonated through the living room and brought the focus to her. "Baby what's going on?" she asked in a soft way, but her tone still demanded an answer.

"Kol threatened Leila and Damon… Damon just…" She gave up mid-sentence, not knowing what Damon intended to do. She had never seen him that furious, and if it were not for her little girl in her arms, she would be crumbling with anguish.

"Damon will kill him, Stefan … Stefan!" Lily completed Bonnie's statement, knowing her son's temper. She called for her other son, hoping he could prevent the worst.

Stefan appeared in the room, confused at why his name was being shouted all over the room and he found his mother pacing in the living room.

"Go after your brother, he is about to act like his father."

please review

* * *

 _ **Please review and I promised to do my best to get the next chapter out faster than this one or even my soon to come forced hiatus because of exams.**_


	25. Chapter 25

**thanks for the reviews**

 **a big thank to my amazing beta Danielle aka isawyouasaperson. check her bamon stories**

 **PLEASE REVIEW**

* * *

 **chapter XXV**

* * *

 _Thirty fucking floors_ , Stefan thought bitterly as he stared at the elevator coming up. Waiting for the slow engine to stop on his floor had been a painful experience. He thought about using the stairs, but he had the misfortune to be on the fiftieth floor and he couldn't waste his energy. Restraining Damon would be a strenuous task. It always required using physical force and being in harm's way.

Stefan could not remember why they decided to live one of the building's highest floor. They lived three floors below the top floor. Right now, it was an inconvenient decision. He impatiently tapped his foot on the floor. At the unexpected sensation of cold under his toes, the young man glanced down and noticed that he had forgotten his shoes in the rush. He sighed with frustration and irritation.

Stefan had no idea why his mother sent him after his brother, but he understood the situation was dire. He touched his back and felt cold metal, just a measure of security. Lily shouting his name so desperately triggered primal instinct. The first thing Stefan learned from his father was never to neglect precautions.

"Finally!" He sighed loudly as the elevator stopped in front of him and the doors opened wide.

His joy was short and he felt his anger grow tenfold. The lift contained enough people to assure his trip would be unnecessary long, due to impromptu stops.

 _Just my luck_. Stefan thought bitterly.

He still entered and kept his head high when a few eyes stared at his bare feet. He could care less about his appearance now. Damon's fits of anger often ended in catastrophe, and some messes were harder to clean than others. Seven minutes, seven fucking minutes. Stefan looked at his watch and started wondering how much damage his brother could do in such little time.

 _Broken jaw, oh broken ribs, a twisted neck…fuck_. When the list of option started to become too long and frightening, Stefan had to stop thinking about those possibilities. He sincerely hoped Damon didn't do anything irreparable but that would be putting too much faith in an angry Salvatore.

Years in the crime world made anyone paranoid, and Stefan wasn't an exception. He began contemplating the worse scenario. What would happen if Damon committed a murder? Giuseppe would not jump in to save him. It isn't fucking Florence, Stefan reminded himself. The family had influences in this town, but it wasn't as strong as in Florence where they could get away with murder. In Mystic Falls and the rest of America, the Salvatore merely had estates for laundering their money.

….

…..

…..

When the elevator stopped on the twentieth floor, Stefan felt the need to scream but he held on to his fleeting sanity. The entire thing was surely a joke. A slow elevator wouldn't be what prevented him from saving his brother. The moment was too dire to have everyday life inconveniences turned into deciding factors.

He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. He knew he could not lose his mind over trivial things before he could even reach his older brother. However, fate was extremely taunting. He took a deep breath and pushed psychotic thoughts away. However, Stefan could not keep his countenance when a blonde woman tried to stop the elevator while she waited for her friends to hop in.

The laugh that escaped Stefan's lip was full of cynicism, exasperation, and consternation. The few other people around him looked at him with concern-filled eyes but he didn't care. Stefan glared at the woman holding the door and hoped it would be enough to scare her.

If she had any sense of self-preservation, she might have let go of the elevator door. Instead, she brushed off Stefan's glare as irritation and missed the murderous intent behind the fiery green orbs. Anxiety always propelled Stefan close to the deeper edges. Stress and urgency always unleashed the erratic side of him.

"Everyone out." He spoke slowly and he made his intentions obvious.

His posture might have told a convincing story. Of the five other peoples with him in the elevator, three left without a ruckus. However, the woman who was holding the elevator door did not budge and another man just moved closer to the exit. The blond woman stared back at Stefan. She assumed the pretty boy was all bluff, so she kept her challenging posture.

Any other day, Stefan would not have been eager to attract the wrong attention to himself. However, with each minute, Damon was probably closer to committing the mistake of his life. Now Stefan couldn't draw the energy to care about good neighbour relationships.

He smiled softly and he shook his head. First, he focused on the man who was standing closer to the elevator door.

"Out!" He hissed, but the man refused to look at him.

Stefan coughed to attract the man's attention and bluntly asked him to leave. Every ounce of courage in the poor man left him, and he ran out. After kicking out the man, Stefan menacingly walked toward the blonde woman, but she was a stubborn one, and she didn't give an inch away.

"Are you serious?" she complained but still didn't move.

Just a glance at her and Stefan knew she was the arguing type, but he had no time to argue. He cocked an eyebrow in interrogation but also issued a warning. He sighed as he wished to free all the frustration weighing on his body. His hand went on his back and with a quick motion, he pulled a gun out, and then he once again cocked his eyebrow.

 _I thought so_ , he thought as he watched her run away. She would probably go report him. However, he didn't care when his father owned half of the building. He put the gun back and eagerly pressed the lobby button and kept the elevator door closed until he reached his destination.

* * *

Stefan looked at his watch once he made it to the building's lobby. Thirteen minutes only. He had felt like more time was lost in the elevator, but thirteen minutes was manageable. His eyes flew around as they searched for Damon but there was not a sign of his older brother.

Damon's absence prompted a moment of panic. Stefan prayed that nothing too harsh happened. However, the silent words directed to any entity above died on his lips when he saw a little pool of blood on the lobby's marble floor. The red abnormally stood out in a delicate contrast with the greyish marble. Stefan felt sick at the sight of blood.

 _The idiot really ruined his life. What the fuck I'm supposed to do now?_ Stefan thought angrily.

He looked around, hoping to find a lifeline. Sweat was accumulating on his forehead, saliva pooling in his mouth, and the desire to vomit grew. Stefan passed his shaking hand through his hair. His skin was pale and he was trying to contemplate viable scenarios. However, he knew Damon and it was safe to assume he went overboard.

Stefan still remembered the day after Damon discovered Rose and Enzo. A few bones had been broken and worse would have happened to Enzo if Giuseppe hadn't ordered one of his soldiers to knock out his eldest son. Now there was no Giuseppe to help contain the situation.

Damon was nowhere in sight. Stefan could not decide if it was a good thing or if he needed to be extremely worried. The young man decided to go with worried. Why did Damon have to act so stupidly when he had a family? Would he have to call their father? Stefan started to think fast as he continued looking for Damon around the lobby. The entire room was almost empty apart from few men dressed in black. Stefan looked at them for a second in confusion.

He had to do a double take, but he recognized few faces. Before he could approach them, his attention was stolen away by a very familiar voice. He quickly looked around and spotted distinctive, jet-black hair. The grave velvet voice coated by strong Italian accent brought warm comfort to Stefan.

The young man finally looked at the lobby with interest. The men in black were keeping the place closed and the building was on lockdown. Stefan returned his attention to the man with jet-black hair, the man who also happened to be his father, Giuseppe Salvatore. Stefan was baffled because he didn't expect his father to be here so early, but he came right in time.

….

…..

…..

He can deal with his son's mess. If Damon crossed the line, then Papa is his best option. He frowned at his own thought because the Salvatore sons always tried to be independent. However, every time the situation became unmanageable, they always sought their father's help.

"Now you work here, right?" The voice was quiet and full of confidence.

Giuseppe towered over the building's doorman. He was the only witness of what happened earlier and right now, he was under duress. The young man answered the question with a shaky nod. He couldn't speak, he was still shocked after witnessing one of the building's resident attack a man, and then the rest went so fast.

"Your name, young man." The voice was stoic and exigent. Giuseppe placed a strong hand on the young man's shoulder and squeezed to help bring him back to reality.

The gateman did not want to speak but he felt compelled to do so. There were at least six men dressed in black around the lobby, and each of them obeyed the man questioning him. In addition, the man in front of him had a charismatic and frightening aura. The young man swallowed hard and he took a minute to reply.

"Joshua Parker," he stuttered a bit and pearl of sweat covered his upper lip.

Poor Joshua was having an awful day. He gripped his phone and prayed nothing bad happened to him. In the past minutes, he saw an unconscious man being carried away and didn't want to be the next one. Joshua glanced back for a second but against his will, his eyes returned on Giuseppe Salvatore.

"Well I own the place, so you work for me and you look like you need the money. I can be generous but that won't stop you from snitching. Self-preservation is a better incentive." Steel blue eyes stared deep into the shaking young man's soul.

"Here." Joshua put his phone in Giuseppe's hand.

The older man looked through it until he found the right video. He hated this new generation and their need to record everything, but at least Joshua Parker had been so busy recording that he didn't call the police.

"Good, you might get a promotion. What job do you want around here?" he said with a frightening nonchalance. His tone didn't mask the underlying threat.

"I don't know," the young gateman said dumbly.

 _Why do I have this rotten luck? Really, I thought it was just a silly fight, which could have gone viral and now this,_ he thought bitterly and once again, he glanced back toward the place where they moved the bloody body and the other man fighting.

"Now you look smart." His tone wasn't convincing, but Giuseppe was a jetlag.

"I hope you understand what someone like me can do with just your name. You have family…friends…and a girlfriend?" Giuseppe observed the young man and decided to revisit his statement.

"You have a family… maybe a friend." Sep gained the young man's undivided attention and Joshua quickly nodded. He had watched enough television and movies to understand what the older man meant.

"Take this back and get someone to clean that floor. Think about the job you want and I will send someone to check on you tomorrow." The Salvatore patriarch put a hand on the young man shoulder and he squeezed encouragingly.

….

…..

…

"Papa?" Stefan said, completely surprised by his father's presence.

He looked at the man whom Damon resembled so much. Giuseppe Salvatore had dark black hair, he was taller than both his sons and his eyes would put Damon's to shame. Overall, the man had aged beautifully and he had an exterior grace that fascinated most people around him. However, much like his first son, his temper was dangerous and he could be ruthless when dealing with people he considered a threat.

"Stefano, aren't you a bit late?" he said with a softness in his voice that he reserved only to his sons.

He walked toward his son and quickly hugged him. Stefan hugged him back and quickly broke the embrace. The young man had few questions to ask his father. During his first hour in America, Giuseppe was already threatening people and surely covering an ignoble act committed by his elder son. Stefan was thrown back into his teenage days.

Giuseppe graciously sat on the leather sofa that furnished the building lobby. He elegantly crossed his left ankle on his right knee and waited for his youngest son to take a seat close to him, but Stefan just stood on the side.

"Well, Damon…" Stefan didn't even know how to pursue his inquiry. Giuseppe continued to bore holes into his son.

Stefan issued an incomprehensible statement a mixed between confusing words and an even more ambiguous question. The young man was too agitated to sit.

"Damon and his antics. The Bambino doesn't know how to behave." His father laughed goodheartedly and Stefan still didn't relax.

Giuseppe laughing was not an indication of how precarious a situation could be. The man found humour in everything and nothing. The Salvatore patriarch only answered a question when it was clearly asked, so he waited for his son to choose his words correctly. Stefan rolled his eyes but he took a deep breath until his mind was sharp and freed of all confusing thoughts.

"Where is Damon?" Stefan asked and waited for a clear answer.

"Rectifying his mistake. You see, I walked into this building and found your brother acting like a savage. I have raised you better, haven't I?" he truthfully seemed appalled at the thought that his children lacked decorum.

However, it wasn't the prospect of Damon violently beating someone that appalled him. Giuseppe was simply disappointed that his son did it in front of a witness, which Stefan already understood. The young man grew up with his father's mantra; witnessed make life complicated.

"Papa?" his youngest son grew tired of his shenanigans. He sighed and finally took a seat by his side.

If Giuseppe Salvatore didn't want to be helpful, no one could force him to be. Everyone always had to play by his rules. If Stefan wanted answers, he would sit and obey Giuseppe's silent request. The Salvatore patriarch discarded his suit jacket and uncrossed his leg. The man regained his seriousness and slightly turned to the side so he could face his son. He looked at Stefan with concern and spoke with a grave expression.

"I really hope I did raise you better than that." The smirk sitting on his lips was very similar to Damon's.

…

….

…..

Stefan understood his father was unfazed by the situation. The young man looked around as he tried to temper his frustration. The young gateman who was previously talking to Giuseppe now cleaned the floor adamantly. Giuseppe followed his son's eyes and he stared at the cleaning young man intimidatingly.

"Now he is complicit. He won't run to the police." The older Salvatore said quietly.

Giuseppe closed his eyes while he let his head fall back; he needed to rest after his long flight. Stefan didn't like the way his father sounded. For now, he could assume Kol was dead.

"Papa, where is Damon?" There was more urgency in Stefan's voice.

Giuseppe sighed with exasperation and opened his eyes. Why does he have to be so dramatic? he thought regretfully as he looked at the concern expression on his son features. The man checked his watch and he estimated that Damon had enough time to do what was necessary.

"In that office…talking to the man, he was beating up. Hopefully passing the right message." He punctuated his sentence with a finger pointing at a door leading to the back of the building.

"Papa, this is not Florence. You can't just let Damon do whatever he wants," Stefan said, though he was slightly relieved.

"Obviously this is not Florence; the young man is still breathing and will continue to do so once your brother is done with him. How are you, bambino?" he said casually as he pulled a cigarette out and offered one to Stefan. The younger Salvatore graciously said no and answered the question his father asked.

"I'm fine, Papa." He relaxed into his seat and occasionally glanced at the door leading to the office where Damon was locked with Kol. The father and son duo stayed in a comfortable silence for few minutes. They were both gauging what was the right time to interrupt Damon.

"That is great, but you look thinner, Stefano, while your brother looks healthy. Perhaps you should find a good woman too. Your momma told me Damon is in love, and she is a sweet girl. Is your mama home, by the way, I wanted to surprise her?" Giuseppe broke the silence. The casualty of the conversation surprised Stefan. The young man eyed his father and wonder if he had all his head.

"Do you really want to have a trivial conversation while your son is in the other room savagely attacking another man?" He asked incredulously.

"Do you have a better idea on how to pass the time?" Giuseppe countered and Stefan didn't propose a better option. "I thought so."

"Mama is home and worried because Damon just ran out of the apartment. She sent me after him and what are you doing here?" the young Salvatore replied reluctantly.

"If your mother sent you after your brother then go get him. Why are you asking me stupid questions?" His father said with a hint of annoyance.

"What happened to have a small talk?" he countered sarcastically.

Giuseppe rolled his eyes, unimpressed by his son antics. In addition, he was not ready to go through a long lecture; Lily would have a lot to say if Damon went overboard.

"Do you want to explain everything to your mother? Because I know I don't want to. Go tell your brother to stop and if he doesn't listen, knock him out. Gianluigi is in the room with him, he might help you carry him. You know how he gets when he is furious." His voice was serious and he meant every word. Stefan just shook his head at his eccentric father.

* * *

Ten, twenty, or thirty minutes. Bonnie was trying to estimate how long Damon had been gone. She could hardly think with Leila's cry breaking the deafening silence. Therefore, Bonnie chose to focus on her child. She had to keep all her bad thoughts away, but she was failing utterly.

"Shush baby, mommy is here. Leila. everything is fine." Her soothing words did little good.

Leila's cries were destabilizing Bonnie. With each cry, she assumed her incompetence as a mother was thrown in her face. She tried to draw a deep breath and it was useless. She was quickly panicking, which Leila felt. The young Bennett was doing her best to stay in the moment. However, she revisited the moment when Kol's convinced her to abandon her daughter. Kol, why must this horrible man make her doubt herself as a mother?

 _I couldn't protect her against him before, how can I do it now?_ She wondered.

"Here, look at mama." Bonnie tried to move her daughter so the little girl could look at her, but it was impossible.

Leila's cries grew louder and her face had to be pried away from Bonnie's shoulder. Bonnie did a herculean effort to fight the strong flow of tears threatening to undo her. Her daughter was latching onto her hips, her small legs strongly wrapped around Bonnie's waist, and Leila's little finger dug inside the tender flesh of her mother's shoulder.

Any effort to dislodge the child ended in failure and deep scratches in Bonnie's shoulder. Leila would thrash if Lily even just came closer to her or she would scream louder. Leila had never thrown a tantrum of this magnitude but it seemed the interaction with Kol had been impactful. The little girl had been able to sense every emotion in the air. She was expressing the fear her mother was trying to hide.

…

….

…..

Bonnie sighed desperately and she cleaned some rogue tears with her free hand. Her arms were tiring. After thirty minutes, she started to find her little girl heavy. In addition, she suddenly became drained emotionally. The young woman continued pacing back and forth with her daughter attached to her hips. She glanced at Leila and her worries grew, as did her guilt.

She wrongfully believed she brought Kol into her child's life. She refused to see the situation reasonably, the heavy baggage of her dark days was toppling inside the new life she fought to build. A second considering who Kol was would have cleared her confusion on who was to blame. She would have understood his unhealthy obsession with her and his devilish greed.

Bonnie looked at the door with desperation. That man always had to destroy my life, she thought bitterly. Her head started pounding, her eyes were bright red, and her anxiety made her nauseous. She needed her boyfriend to walk back into the room. Bonnie continued pacing back and forth, her arm strongly holding her daughter as she stared at the entrance door.

"It's okay bambina. I'm sure Stefan stopped him before he could do anything stupid," Lily said as she placed a comforting hand on Bonnie's back.

The Salvatore matriarch had noticed Bonnie's constant stares at the door. She shared the young woman's anxiety, she had witnessed other events when her son lost his temper. Now, she prayed he did nothing that would be irreparable.

Bonnie just wanted Damon's support.

"I will go make some tea. We need something to calm everyone's nerves," Sheila said as she stood from the sofa.

The women pacing back and forth in front of her were giving her vertigo. As the matriarch of the family, she seemed to be the only one to have her emotions in check.

"Baby come help your Grams." She took Leila in her arms. Her intentions were purely to help but it seemed to have the opposite effect.

…

….

…..

The little girl instantly protested and she immediately extended her arm toward her mother so Bonnie could take her back. Leila's shenanigans didn't deter Sheila. The older woman understood Bonnie was in no state to help Leila. Mother and child fed on each other's stress. It was a vicious emotional circle and she had the best intentions in the word as she tried to break it.

Bonnie would panic and Leila would sense it, which would lead to the little girl tightly holding on her mother. When Leila would panic, then Bonnie would feel guilty and incompetent. The best thing to do was to put some space between them, and that was what Sheila intended to do. However, her granddaughter misinterpreted the older woman's intentions.

"Grams, it's fine. I will take her." Bonnie could not stand her daughter's cries.

Now, it was all too much and Bonnie did not know what to do. She felt sick with anxiety, inadequacy, and an overload of negative feelings. Having Sheila take her child from her arms just reinforced those feelings. Bonnie saw it as an attempt to undermine her ability as a mother. Perhaps her grandmother believed she was unable to take care of her own daughter, and she started projecting her own feelings onto Sheila. Kol's presence had definitely opened old wounds and some emotions which still needed to be dealt with, resurfaced.

"Grams, give me back my daughter!" she insisted after Sheila did not cooperate the first time she asked. The only reason the young woman was not shouting was her frightened daughter.

However, her grandmother just nestled a crying Leila on her hips. Grams interpreted Bonnie's agitation as a signal to intervene, but she missed the fact that the young woman grew more agitated as soon as her child was out of her arms.

…

….

…..

"Bambina, why don't you sit for a second? We are just trying to help here. Clearly, both my granddaughter and you are shaken by recent events and it will be..." A furious Bonnie cut Lily before her words could take their intended meaning.

"Don't tell me that I can't protect my daughter. I am not a helpless teenager and I can take care of my child." The tears, which she tried so hard to avoid just started falling.

Her interaction with Kol brought to the surface insecurities that she hadn't felt in a year. Bonnie was finally in the mental space where she felt she was a capable mother, and small doubts on how to raise Leila could be sometime present but every time she could easily overcome those. However, now, her world and confidence seemed to be unable to sustain this new attack.

"No one is implying anything. Baby, we just want you to feel better and we're trying to help." Sheila tried to appease her granddaughter.

However, every little thing antagonized Bonnie. Damon storming out, Leila incessant crying, and the perpetual replay of her argument with Kol. She could not bottle up such emotions. She needed a focal point for her anger. Sheila was simply the unfortunate victim.

"Here, no one is taking you away from mommy." The petite woman suddenly snatched Leila from her grandmother's arm.

The matriarch Bennett wanted to say something but Lily put a hand on her shoulder. There was a moment of silence, a quick nonverbal conversation between the older women, and it seemed enough to diffuse the building tension between the Bennett women.

The Salvatore matriarch easily understood Bonnie's reaction, but she similarly understood where Sheila was coming from. The Bennett matriarch wanted genuinely to help, but sometimes being a bystander could be helpful. Bonnie was presently battling old demons, and even if she shared Sheila's eagerness to help, Lily understood it would only poison the situation.

"Mommy will always be here. No one, I promise no one will ever take you away from me again." She furiously wiped some tears and she walked out of the room.

….

…..

….

Grams was beginning to follow her when Lily stopped her. Sheila sighed with exasperation and looked at Lily grudgingly. It didn't scare the younger woman. The Italian woman had become familiar with the reasonable side of the Bennett matriarch.

"I am just trying to help her. I can't just look at her while she is falling apart," Sheila insisted as she tried to bypass Lily but the brunette woman intercepted her one more time.

"No one is asking you to do that. We all want to help her but she might not be in the state to take that help," Lily said softly as she walked Sheila away from the staircase leading to Bonnie's room.

"Do you have any idea what that boy did to her before? I can't just look at her and wait for her to be able to figure herself out. Sometimes you have to force her," Sheila argued.

"You can't be pushy every time, Sheila. It is her child, her past, and her battle. Right now, she is defensive and full of self-doubt. Anything you'd do might just make her feel bad. I want to help her too, but in the past days, I have learned to take a back seat on some issues. You saw her reaction. She needs to succeed; no talk or speech will convince her that she can take care of her child until she calms Leila," the Italian woman said firmly.

Sheila hesitated for a second, but she eventually sat back on the sofa. She turned her attention to the door and she sighed deeply.

"Is it bad that I wish Damon could kill that bastard?" She said after few minutes.

"Was it that bad? Was he that cruel?" At Bonnie's reaction after seeing the man, Lily had a clear idea about the answer and it took all of her to ask those questions.

"He forced her to give Leila away and mentally abused her for a year. He harassed her the next years and he always pops into her life when everything is perfect. I can't just sit here while she is going through all of this, I can't be a bystander again." Sheila stood up.

"But you will have to. Some trauma needs to be overcome alone. She needs that victory over him. Have some faith in her; she is no longer a fragile teenager. She is a capable mother and she needs to convince herself of that fact." The Italian matriarch tried to call upon reason.

"Do you want some tea, I need to be busy." Sheila yielded.

"I'm right behind you but I think once Damon comes back we might all need stronger stuff."

* * *

Stefan walked into the office and he didn't attract Damon's attention. The elder Salvatore focused on Kol. The man who was appointed as Damon's security, Gianluigi, nodded a silent hello to Stefan, and then returned his focus to the scene in front of him. Stefan had a strong stomach and now he was thankful for that. Trust Damon to behave like Giuseppe, Stefan thought as he approached his brother.

The oldest Salvatore son concentrated his effort on the man on the ground. Kol curled up around protectively as Damon's designer leather loafer connected repeatedly with his rib cage. Stefan silently gave an order to Gianluigi and a second later, the man removed Damon from Kol.

"Alright, slow down," Stefan said in a very contained tone.

He bent down and held Kol's chin between his forefinger and thumbs. Stefan carefully observed the young man's face, turning it left and right. It was as bad as he expected. There were shallow and deep cuts everywhere. Judging by the amount of bleeding around the nose, it was broken. The bleeding was so strong, Stefan estimated it could lead to suffocation, so he tilted Kol's head to free his airways.

"Mind your business, Stefano," Damon spat with anger as he tried to escape Gianluigi's iron grip. However, it was a waste of energy.

"If you think about it, once you're in jail for murder, I'll have to take care of your daughter and girlfriend. I don't really want to do that, so this is my business." His voice was full of sarcasm.

He quickly helped Kol on his feet and unceremoniously threw him on the closest chair. Stefan carefully avoided the pool of blood on the floor and then he examined his feet with interest hoping that they didn't touch the blood.

"Don't be dramatic. I'm not planning to kill him." Once again, Damon tried to escape Gianluigi. At his statement, both Salvatore man glanced at Kol's broken form. Stefan's eyebrows flew up in disbelief. Damon's murderous intent was clear just from Kol's face.

"I am just trying to make the young man understand that he should stay away from my family." Damon was trying to sound calm.

Now he just wanted to be freed so he could continue where he was stopped. Damon stared viciously at the whimpering Kol. The anger was not yet out of Damon's system and he felt as if nothing could sooth it. Attacking Kol had freed so many impulses in him, and now he was having a hard time controlling them. He needed the Mikealson to pay for everything he did and what he probably intended to do.

"Is he unconscious?" Stefan inquired loudly when the whimpers and wincing ceased at once.

He quickly tapped on Kol's cheek. Kol's skin was extremely warm and it calmed Stefan. The young man took a deep breath and he once again slapped Kol.

"I didn't go too hard on him. The bastard is still conscious," Damon said with exasperation.

He was tired of fighting against Gianluigi's grip and beating Kol had drained his energy. He could feel his knuckles throbbing and he cursed silently because now he was feeling the pain. The consistent sharp pain in his forefinger was enough to tell him that he broke it while hitting the other man's nose repeatedly.

"That's great!" Stefan clapped with fake excitement. He rolled his eyes at the absurdity of the moment. "Gianluigi can finish him for you, and then he will drop him in front of a hospital or just get one of our doctors to make sure that he stays alive." His casual tone just made the statement more ludicrous to his ears. However, until a year ago, these types of situations were common occurrences in Stefan's life.

"I'm not done yet. The bastard deserves more than a broken nose and few broken ribs." Damon groaned.

"You're done if the goal is not to kill him. He is barely breathing." Stefan countered with a tone that prevented a future argument.

He nodded in Damon's general direction and Gianluigi carefully placed Damon back on the floor. The Salvatore henchman advanced toward Kol, admiring Damon's handy work. He didn't have much to do because Kol was delirious and at the edge of unconsciousness.

…..

….

…

"I said I wasn't done." Damon hissed furiously as he tried to bypass Stefan to get to Kol.

Damon didn't hesitate and shoved Stefan out his way. Gianluigi was clever enough to take two steps away from Kol. Before Stefan could recover from the shove and stop him, Damon hit Kol across the jaw with all the strength he could muster. He felt the bone on his already painful finger move out of place. However, he didn't care and he used the same hand to punch again.

"I'm allowed to knock you out. Look, you need to calm down and think rationally." Stefan finally grabbed him and moved him away from the Mikealson. However, Damon used his long legs to kick violently on Kol's chest while his younger brother dragged him away.

"He threatened Leila and I am being very rational," he shouted furiously as he pushed once again to escape his brother's paralyzing grip.

He shoved Stefan multiple times but the young man did not budge. Damon shouted his bottled rage and strong frustration. He hated when Saint Stefan was in his way. He glared at his brother and shoved him away with as much strength he could.

"No, you're angry and you aren't thinking about the consequences. Someone saw you when you first attacked him, so you need to chill, or I will have to calm you. Bonnie is already worried and I don't think she would take it well if I bring you back unconscious." The younger Salvatore matched his brother angry tone.

He was tired of this mess. His feet were in a pool of blood and his designer pants were tainted with filth. Stefan grabbed Damon by the elbow and pulled him away from Kol.

"That is low even coming from you." He did not want to agree with his younger brother, but Stefan's words felt like a cold shower. He couldn't lose Bonnie and Leila.

Damon took a deep breath. He stared at Kol, who was back on the ground after Damon's kick toppled the chair he was sitting on. Just looking at Kol made Damon boil with fury; if he stayed around then he would give into temptation. He walked out of the room because he needed to control his emotions. The eldest Salvatore son took five minutes to breathe and came back in the room.

"Better?" Stefan asked.

Damon didn't answer. He just passed Stefan and walked straight toward Kol. He crouched and took the man's chin in his hand. He forced the Mikealson to look at him. Kol's eyes were swollen, his eyelid almost fully closed. Damon didn't care if Kol could not see him. He wanted to look into the man's eyes when he issued a warning.

"Hey focus." He tapped on Kol's cheek and continued speaking when a whimper escaped Kol's mouth. "The next time you even breathe close to anyone from my family, I will hurt you worse than this. I will kill you and get away with it."

"Fuck you and your pretty family…" Kol coughed. Even through his exhaustion, the young man found the energy to chuckle.

"Don't tempt me," Damon hissed as he walked away, remembering what he had to lose.

"Clean this up and make sure he lives," Stefan barked orders to Gianluigi and followed Damon.

…

…

….

"So can anyone explain to me what is going on?" the Salvatore patriarch asked when he saw his sons reentered the lobby.

Giuseppe stood up from the lobby's sofa and he met Damon and Stefan midway. He looked at his eldest son and refrained from commenting. He redirected his focus to Stefan and waited for the answer to his question.

"You didn't recognize him?" Stefan asked in surprise.

"The man's face was swollen and Damon was on top of him when I stumbled upon the mess," Giuseppe answered casually and glanced at Damon.

His son seemed to be in between emotions. He was no longer angry but he had not recovered his sanity. Damon didn't care about the conversation around him. Now that he had unleashed his anger on Kol, he still didn't feel content. He just believed the type of man that Kol was, never gave up. He will come back, he thought darkly.

"Remember Leila's surrogate mother? That was the man who brought her to us," Stefan explained to his father and Giuseppe was silent for a minute.

Stefan's words caught Damon's attention and he decided to listen to his father and brother's conversation. He obviously knew learning more about the misery Kol brought in Bonnie's life would infuriate him. However, there was a morbid need to listen.

"The man was a nasty manipulator," Giuseppe said with strong disdain as he remembered Kol and his antics. Unaware of the relationship between Bonnie and his son, Giuseppe didn't hesitate to share sensible details.

"He initially wanted to sell her sexual services. Imagine associating me with sex trafficking." His tone carried the disgust that he felt just thinking about it.

It was the first time anyone attempted to pay a debt by offering him a girl, and Giuseppe almost had Kol killed for it. The last thing Giuseppe wanted his family to be associated with was human trafficking and prostitution. The Salvatores never expanded their crime empire in that direction. It was always weapons and money laundering through their casino and real estate investments. Children and women were left untouched. The empire survived by respecting few values. Therefore, when Kol wanted to sell Bonnie so he could repay a debt, Giuseppe was appalled.

"I do have values, not a lot, but I do have some. He ended up offering her passport to me instead after I refused more sordid offers. The young woman was lucky you needed a surrogate mother at the time, or I'm sure he would have found someone with fewer scruples. The young man was desperate and reckless," The Salvatore patriarch continued to narrate. He was now speaking directly to his older son.

He had no idea of the effect his words had on Damon. Stefan glanced at Damon and it was clear that the anger was back. The eldest Salvatore son abruptly stopped and glanced at the door leading to the office where he left Kol.

 _I'm going to kill this piece of shit._

"Fuck… Damon!" Stefan shouted when his elder brother took off running. He had no choice but to follow.

"Bambinos… behave," Giuseppe said, completely unbothered by the sudden agitation around him.

"The bastard is gone," Damon said when Stefan reached him. He stared at the empty office and he regretted being too late.

"Can you calm down for a second? Let's get you clean up and please try to control yourself because your child and girlfriend need you." Stefan placed a hand on Damon's shoulder and forced his brother to move away from the door and the office.

"Can the both of you stop running around?" Giuseppe said when once again his sons caught up with him.

"Papa, Leila's surrogate mother is the sweet girl mama can't stop talking about," Stefan whispered afraid another misused word could trigger Damon's anger.

"Get your brother to clean himself." His look implied more than what he said.

After years learning under his father tutelage, Stefan always knew what every look meant. Giuseppe pulled a phone and he walked away to place a call.

* * *

"Leila, mommy is here. Please calm down." Bonnie tried to put her daughter on the bed, but Leila clung to her.

Bonnie sat down on the bed. She mentally talked herself down and she stared at her daughter. Perhaps, it was wiser to let Leila express her anguish. She rocked her baby back and forth, as the little cried relentlessly on her arm. Eventually Bonnie sensed that Leila was ready to calm down because she felt calmer too. However, she continued rocking back and forth until Leila was lulled into some type of comfort. Her little fingers closed around Bonnie's shirt and she nestled her head in her mother's shoulder.

The entire episode was heartbreaking. In a year spent with her daughter, never Bonnie had witnessed Leila cried with such angst. The moment weighed on her. It felt similar to seven years ago when she was unable to stop anything due to her lack of agency. However, her self-conceived insecurity stopped her from being the good mother she had become to be. She took a deep breath and decided to be natural about it.

Sniff…sniff. Leila sobs turned into quiet sniffles, but she refused to leave her mother's arms.

"You were so small and now you're this big. I'm really sorry for what I did before but I swear I'm never leaving again." Her words were the result of strong impulse. She understood her words wouldn't resonate with her daughter, but she deserved to know.

"Look at me, baby." She lovingly took Leila's face in her hands and she cleaned the tears away.

"No one will do anything to you. I am here forever and I am sorry. I was so young and stupid." She insisted on explaining her action.

"Mommy loves you more than anything… you're my everything now and you were my everything then too." Her words took no meaning in Leila's mind, but the emotion behind them reached her. The little girl understood the solemnity of the moment, she sat straighter, and she accepted her mother confession.

"It's okay mama… it's okay if you're not leaving," Leila offered timidly and she placed her arm around Bonnie's waist. She simply wanted her mother to feel well.

"Never again. I will be forever here until you grow old," Bonnie promised with all her heart and she intended it to be unbreakable.

"I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry princess." She could no longer hold her tears back.

"I forgive you, mama, you can stop crying," Leila automatically replied. She wiped a tear and moved closer to Bonnie.

"You know I love you so much and I want you to know it," Bonnie insisted.

"I know." The little girl offered her brightest smile to punctuate words that had been said with the strongest conviction. Leila nestled her head on Bonnie's chest and she yawned. The tears had ceased and suddenly the little girl was peaceful. She still held onto Bonnie, but it was no longer due to anxiety. Leila yawned again and it made Bonnie laugh.

"You tired, baby?" Bonnie asked with a warm smile.

"I'm not…" Leila replied, offended, but her eyes were already closing.

"Okay, you aren't. Mommy loves you." Bonnie kissed her baby's forehead.

….

…..

…..

Bonnie spent an entire hour staring at her daughter's sleeping frame. The fear of losing her was too strong to allow her to look somewhere else. Kol's presence tainted her entire view of the situation. Bonnie needed a grip on the present but now she was haunted by the past. Talking to Leila was liberating. Receiving her daughter's forgiveness soothed her, even if the little girl did not understand the situation. Bonnie tried to clean her puffy eyes.

She muttered some encouraging words and found the strength to leave the room where Leila was sleeping. She needed time to herself and she felt it was only right to apologize to Sheila. As she came closer to the living room, growing noise caught her attention. She heard Stefan's voice and few others but it was enough to make her walk faster. Bonnie needed to be in his arms and she needed his protective embrace.

"She is in the room with Leila and I think she really needs you." She heard as she stepped into the room.

Sheila was quietly talking to Damon. Her words were fitting. Bonnie quickly tried to clean the remaining tears and she quietly made her way into the room. The young woman practically ignored everyone. She was exhausted; she had held her pain and anguish too long. She knew Damon could make it all better because he understood her insecurity. She walked in a straight line and she silently stood in front of him. The young woman just helplessly stood in front of him and he knew what to do.

"Hey babe," Damon fiercely hugged her. The contact with Bonnie seemed to have cleared his own anxious state. He placed a tender kiss on the crown of her head and tightly hugged her.

"Is it going to be alright?" she whispered against his chest and she strengthened her hug. She asked her question with a voice filled with shy hope. However, she was convinced he was the only one able to have the right answer to this question.

"I will make sure it is," he answered with conviction.

After this long day filled with anguish, she felt strong. She broke her hug and she turned to face Sheila. She wanted to apologize but the words died on her lips when her eyes met a ghost from her past.

"What is he doing here?" Bonnie's voice was shaky and she drew closer to Damon. Her eyes never left the man who was the spitting image of her boyfriend. One glance at Giuseppe Salvatore and she was back in Florence, accepting the offer which would set in motion a series of painful events.

"Giuseppe Salvatore, Damon's father," The Italian man extended his hand toward Bonnie and he was identical to her memories.

"You ruined my life so I can hardly forget who you're." She slapped his extended hand away.

 **PLEASE REVIEW**


	26. Chapter 26

**I don't own the vampire diaries**

 **thanks for the review, and enjoy the update**

 **please, review**

* * *

 **chapter 26**

* * *

 **Florence eight year ago.**

"Wait here." Kol said with a trembling voice.

Pearls of cold sweat covered the young man's forehead, and he couldn't breathe properly. He was unsure of the bargain that he wanted to strike. Kol stared at his girlfriend for a second, and he knew what he wanted to do was cruel. Bonnie was young and pretty, and it wouldn't be hard to convince anyone of her sexual value.

Kol swallowed hard as bitter saliva continued to pool in his mouth. In his twenty years of life, he had never known fear as strong as what he felt lying to Bonnie. The poor teenager believed she was here to help in any way she could. The young man took another deep breath, and prayed for his nerve not to dither in a room full of mobsters.

"Perhaps, it'll be better if we just did it together," Bonnie said supportively while taking his hand in hers.

The misinformed teenager tried to help her boyfriend with his growing stress. Kol's heart leapt, and he needed to vomit. Bonnie couldn't follow him inside the room. The entire week, he had thought about the way to fix his mess. In the most cowardly way, he planned to sell her and disappear without facing any tears or useless lamentations. Kol could already see the scene, and he didn't want to witness the misery he caused.

He hadn't discovered an easy way to make his troubles go away. Although, his screaming conscience tried to convince him to rethink. For the past four days, the young couple spent their night in Florence's streets while they tried to hide from Giuseppe Salvatore. Kol couldn't survive a life filled with such precarious event. He didn't deserve to experience such misery, which ironically were the result of his selfish actions. He wanted and needed an easy way out. Unfortunately, trafficking Bonnie was the easiest way.

He was tired of living in fear, and he was desperate. He was ready to attempt anything. Why couldn't he negotiate his freedom and a bit of extra money in exchange for whatever they might want to do to his girlfriend? Giuseppe Salvatore was in some shady business, and so this bargain was right up his alley.

"This people are dangerous, and I…" He hesitated to add some effect and concern to his lies.

Kol knew he needed to be convincing. If Bonnie followed him inside, he would never find the strength to do what he wanted. She would look at him with her shiny green eyes, and he might retrieve an ounce of humanity. In the middle of his narcissistic and psychopathic behaviors, he still had the ability to care for her. Perhaps not love her, but he did care for her. She was the only woman who loved him the way he deserved to be loved.

"I don't want anything to happen to you. Please… I have done enough. You shouldn't be here to start with." Kol continued his act.

The young man had told her a convincing lie, and she had accompanied him to recover their passport. Much like Kol, she was tired of living on the streets, but she refused to abandon her boyfriend. The Salvatore men weren't after her, and she didn't need to hide. She was trying to support her lover. Accordingly, she started saving the money she still had left, and it was nothing. Three hundred euros and a few cents, which could not help much.

"Please stay here…please…please," he begged with teary eyes and voice breaking after every word.

Kol glanced at Bonnie, and the young woman was as stressed as he was. He leaned and placed a kiss on her forehead. He left before she could argue more and entered Giuseppe's office.

….

….

….

….

Bonnie's palms were sticky and sweaty. The teenager looked around the fancy room, and eventually her eyes narrowed on the closed heavy wooden door. Muffled sounds escaped few time from the closed enclave. She wondered what could take so long. Kol promised her to strike the right bargain with the owner of the casino.

Bonnie sat in silence, and her heart continued to race. She had seen the petrified expression on her boyfriend's face. A few minutes later, a loud sound shattered the dreadful silence, which surrounded her. Bonnie ran to the closed door, opening it without hesitation and the sight in front of her terrified the young man. A cry of horror left her lips and she recklessly rushed inside to defend Kol who was on the floor with a man savagely beating him on top.

Bonnie tried to grab Kol's assailant, but someone caught her before she could reach her boyfriend. The young woman started trashing left and right. With all of her strength, she tried to free herself from the iron grip around her waist.

"That's enough Enzo. There is no need to kill him. Where are your manners? A lady just entered the room," an elegant voice filled the room.

Before the sentence was complete, the man of top of Kol, Enzo stopped. Bonnie continued trashing as her eyes fell on a hurt Kol. Tears started to pour out of her eyes. The man speaking, Giuseppe Salvatore appeared before Bonnie, and he asked for the man holding her to put her down. Once on the solid ground, Bonnie tried to run toward Kol, but the Salvatore patriarch held her arm and stopped her.

Giuseppe looked at the young girl in front of him, and he looked at Kol. He shook his head and placed a handkerchief in Bonnie's hand. She needed to dry her tears because the man she shed tears for was unworthy.

"He's not worth it, and this is no place for a lady," Giuseppe spoke, and put the handkerchief in her hand.

Bonnie pried her arm out of his grip. She stared at the older man indignantly. She was unaware the sentence was advice against offering her sexual service to save Kol. The young man offer had offended Giuseppe so much that it resulted in his assault. In the next hour, Kol invented a tall tale, and Bonnie eventually agreed to become a surrogate.

* * *

 **Present day**

"Giuseppe Salvatore, Damon's father." The Italian man extended his hand toward Bonnie, and he was identical to her memories.

"You ruined my life. I can hardly forget who you're." She slapped his extended hand away.

With the exception of Giuseppe, the entire room wore a guilty expression. The Salvatore patriarch slowly put his hand in his pocket, and he sized up Bonnie. His sons and wife might want him to respond apologetically, but they knew better. Lily took a step closer to her husband and grabbed his arm. She was trying to steer him away from Bonnie. Damon slid to Bonnie's left side, and he brushed her shoulder to comfort her.

After the shock almost wore off, Giuseppe decided ultimately to say something.

"I have ruined thousands of lives, so forgive me if I have no memory of you," Giuseppe said sincerely, and the entire room waited for Bonnie implosive reaction.

Although the young woman was furious, the day had taken the last of her combative energy. She stares deep in Giuseppe's eyes, and they were a reflection of Damon's, which dulled any fear she could have to speak up. Without hesitation or fear, Bonnie spoke her mind.

"You're a monster, and I don't want you around my daughter." Her tone was firm.

The young woman moved out of Damon's reach, and walked out of the room with a last glare for the Salvatore patriarch. Giuseppe looked around the room and multiple disapproving eyes greeted him. Lily was the first one to speak while Sheila was slowly processing the information. Her accusatory eyes settled on Damon as she slowly started to understand the situation.

"Sep?" Lily questioned her husband sanity with a raised eyebrow.

"You want me to apologize, and I don't really have any other choice," the Mafioso sighed.

He nodded and walked toward the balcony where Bonnie was trying to calm her nerves. The rest of the room occupant stared at each other until Damon found the strength to answer Sheila's silent interrogation.

"She knows my part in the entire thing. I never intended to hurt her then. We can have a deeper conversation about this later. Now, I have to take care of my daughter and Bonnie." Damon walked to Leila's room.

* * *

Bonnie heard steps coming, and she expected Damon. Although, as the stepping sound came closer, she ruled him out. With her head facing the beautiful panorama, she swallowed the threatening tears.

"No apology could ever make what you did right." She didn't turn her head while she spoke.

Giuseppe didn't leave. He stared at the scenery with Bonnie. For a second, he pondered about the diplomatic answer and chose to say the truth instead. The patriarch considered the petite woman deserving of the truth, and Giuseppe Salvatore only lied to fools.

"Then how fortunate is it that I don't believe I owe you an apology for a mistake you nade in your youth, bambina," Giuseppe said with the same arrogance his sons inherited.

However, he believed every word. He wasn't a man to falter in his truth. The patriarch pulled a chair up, and placed it near a silent Bonnie.

Giuseppe's answer frustrated Bonnie. How could a life-changing event mean so little to this man? She thought angrily, yet the answer was in the question. It was a life-changing event to her, but a simple fluttering minute to a man who had caused his fair share of carnage. Why should her misadventure matter more?

The fury, which had burned her heart earlier, came back. At first, Bonnie intended to ignore Giuseppe, but his nonchalance on the topic infuriated her. She wanted him to understand her anger. She had no desire to forgive him, but she deserved an apology. She would force this man to admit his fault.

"So, for pressuring me into having your son's kid..." she stopped a second because she hated to have such thought about Leila. Leila was and would always be her daughter. Consequently, she corrected herself.

Giuseppe smirked. He found Bonnie interesting. She could go for battle when she believed in her opinion. Damon needed someone with such conviction. He couldn't wait to compare notes with Lily.

She has more character than Damon's ex-wife does, and he definitely needs someone able to oppose him.

His wife hadn't stopped mentioning the young woman, and their encounter was explosive. He chose to treat the young woman with respect from the moment she showed character. He couldn't pretend and apologize when he didn't believe he carried any guilt. Bonnie's rising voice interrupted his thoughts, and Giuseppe started to listen what his daughter in law wanted to say.

"For pressuring me into having my child, for threatening me, and for taking my child away. Don't I deserve any sort of apology?" she shouted furiously.

"We both know better. I have no recollection of doing any of those," his soft voice smoothed every word.

Her anger appeared to have no effect on him. When her voice rose, his voice lowered. To Bonnie's ears, the truth in his words sounded like taunting lies. The smoothness of his voice embellished and softened everything, but they were still lies.

Giuseppe leaned further in his seat and pulled a cigarette out. He extended one toward Bonnie, and the young woman didn't know how to react. Why did she remember the man as a big bad wolf? Now, he appeared to be an extremely calm individual. She glanced at him, hesitant. Giuseppe glanced at the balcony. When he saw nothing suspicious, he lit his cigarette.

"I collected a debt you were willing to pay even though it wasn't yours. I never even asked you to pay. Kol did. I threatened a man you were willing to protect, but I never threatened you. Ultimately, you did the right thing by admitting that you weren't ready to be a mother." His nonchalant tone didn't take away the impact of his words.

Bonnie stared at the Mafiosi. Giuseppe eyes gaze on the horizon line, and he focused on the smoke fading from his cigarette. She wanted to say something more, but it was hard to counter the unadulterated truth. Giuseppe blew smoke circled while he waited for Bonnie to find her tongue. He understood his stare made her uncomfortable, and so he chose to look at the city displaying it beauty.

….

….

….

…..

The young woman kept to herself for a moment. She wanted to refute his words, yet she had no idea how to do it. Which is why she begrudged him more, and she wanted to throw more of her anger in his face.

"Why are you here?"

Giuseppe cocked a questioning eyebrow, and Bonnie felt embarrassment replace her roaring anger. She struggled to keep it alive using the only time she met Giuseppe as an anchor. Unfortunately, she had a new perspective on the event. Her anger had been redirected to Kol.

"To clear the air because you'll have to tolerate me," he continued to shock Bonnie with his disarming sincerity.

"How can you just do what you did, and demand anything?" Bonnie asked, shocked.

"If Leila asked you for something, would you be able to say no?" Giuseppe's question was unexpected.

Bonnie didn't have a time to think, but she knew the answer. It unavoidably shows on her face, and the answer was she would give anything to her daughter. Giuseppe released a contempt sigh. He blew more of his cigarette, even though at every sound from the living room he pushed the cigarette away from him.

"You see Bonnie, we're all loving parents. Today, Leila is asking for toys and love. Tomorrow, she might ask for something immoral, yet you will do it." His voice carried unwavering conviction.

Bonnie wasn't one to deny the truth, and so she kept silent. She would do everything for her daughter, and she already did the amoral part by giving her away. It was belief shattering to discover she shared similarities with Giuseppe Salvatore. They were both parents who would go to any length for their children. He found a surrogate, and she gave Leila away.

"You want an apology then go pry it from the lips of people who wronged you; the man who threatened and used you. However, I believe you are doing just fine without his apology. Your anger toward me is justified, and I will not ask you to get over it," he continued speaking.

"However, I will demand that you act in civil manner toward me. I may not deserve it, but I love my son and granddaughter. I happen to be a good person with them, and that will to extend to you now. I don't want to miss birthdays or dinners, and I'm sure you don't intend to have a scene at every family event. You don't want Leila to lose someone she has known her entire life. We have no choice but to interact, and so I will rather have a pleasant time doing so, Bambina. The amoral things we do for our children."

Bonnie would never be able to take away any sort of love from Leila. She would swallow her principle, and making an exception for her daughter. She looked at Giuseppe, and she disliked being manipulated even when it was made with no real intent to cause harm.

"You could just apologize like any sensitive person" she insisted petulantly.

"Did you apologize to yourself?" he countered

"I did nothing wrong why should I apologize?" she asked indignantly.

"I'm glad that you know that you did nothing wrong. It is not a sin to have charitable nature or even young and idealist. He took advantage of you. Would that have stopped me back then? No, it would not because my son wanted to have a baby. Kol proposed a payment, and I gladly accepted the less degrading offer. I can't be blamed for using anyone who willing let it happen," Giuseppe said and he extinguished his cigarette.

"I thought you came here to clear the air?" Bonnie replied with consternation.

"Am I not doing an amazing job at it?" He had the audacity to attempt a joke with her, and even through her anger, she snorted.

"No, you're antagonizing me," she deadpanned

"I antagonize everyone; side effect of being honest. Although, I'm just trying to find a middle ground. There is no need to be friendly and feel free to ignore me as long as it is in civil manner. Don't do it for me. I have been in Leila's life since day one, that won't change."

"I will try to be civil for everyone sake." Bonnie agreed and she observed him as he slowly sprayed perfume over his clothes.

"I will try to stay out of your way to ease the process, and please don't tell Lily I was smoking."

* * *

Damon observed Bonnie with concern. After what Giuseppe shared with him, he felt extremely protective of his girlfriend. He regretted letting Kol breathe. He joined her under the blanket, and she flinched. The young man didn't take his girlfriend reaction as personal insult.

 _I wouldn't fraternize with the son of my enemy,_ he thought lucidly.

"Have the sins of the father became those of the son?"

Bonnie wasn't aware of Damon's presence until he spoke. Her eyebrows flew up in surprise. She rolled on her back to face him, and she drew him into a hug. They stayed locked in that embrace for several minutes until she could find her words.

"I'm being a hypocrite," she said softly and rested her head on Damon's chest.

His fingers started to comb through her wild curls. He waited for her to expand on the subject but she didn't add anything else. Damon encircled Bonnie in a suffocating embrace. He has no idea how much of comfort she needed now, but surely she needed as much as he wanted to receive.

"No, you've the right to be angry at my father. As much as I tried to forget it, my desire to have a child cost you so much." It wasn't a conversation they could avoid and they did not intend to. Better ground for their relationship meant tackling the original source of the problem. Both their affiliation to Giuseppe and how their beloved child came to be.

"My association with Kol cost me so much. I can't be angry at the entire world but myself. I blamed you. At some point, I blamed Leila. What about what I did? Some of those choices were mine," she echoed her present thought.

Bonnie had spent the rest of the night pondering on what Giuseppe said. She didn't want to but his words had unleashed some suppressed questions.

"Babe you were seventeen, and a teenager who hardly knew the consequences of your decision." Damon tried to comfort Bonnie thoughts and insecurities.

She was so adamant to take the blame. If she started to blame herself for this new sin, she would sink into a new hole.

"I can't forever hide behind young and naïve when I still have to pay for simply seeking love in the wrong place. I knew it was wrong but I didn't want to be alone. I didn't want him to abandon me the way my parent did, and so I offered everything I could to keep him around. I was no longer fitting Grams idea of perfection. Lucy left for Paris after we argued. I had no one left but Kol, and I made those choices because I was afraid he would leave."

"You were young and naïve. That is the truth and you were fragile. We all have moments when we don't make the best call. Babe, I was so afraid to lose you, and I lied. I'm thirty-two years old. If you can find an excuse for me, then a misguided seventeen year old deserves the same courtesy." He pressed a kiss on her lips to punctuate his statement.

"How many people told me he wasn't worth the effort? Even your father said it. The seventeen year old may deserve to be forgiven, but what about today?" she continued to share her regrets with her boyfriend, and Damon silently listened to each of them.

He never rushed into countering her idea, and most of the time Bonnie felt better after her cathartic process. A few tears, and a few comforting words, then she was able to move on.

"What happened isn't on you. You can't blame yourself for the actions of a deranged man."

Damon flexed his numb fingers, and Bonnie noticed the broken hand. She winced and gently pulled it in front of her so she could examine it. She placed small kisses around of his bare skin.

"I brought him into our lives, he had his hands all over Leila, and… his hands were on my daughter, our child." She felt her anger regain some of its potency.

"You defended her like no one has ever done in her life. In my book, you win mom of the year and Leila probably thinks you're wonder woman." He sounded proud and kissed the crown of her head.

"It won't happen again. He won't come near you or Leila." He concluded with conviction.

"How can you be so sure of it? You have no idea what he can and will do. You don't know him like I do," Bonnie objected.

She was hesitant to share more about the lengths Kol went to too make her life hell after they broke up. However, she has no secret for Damon so she shared more event of her dark past, and Damon's list of reason to kill Kol exponentially grew.

"You shouldn't worry much about how somethings are handled. I don't want to ruin the few hours we have before your flight." His tone suddenly carried a dark edge.

"Babe, your family is full of Mafiosi. When you talk about handling things, it isn't reassuring because I picture murder," Bonnie said, sincerely worried. Damon's expression didn't ease her anxiety

…

…

…

"Five hours left before I have to spend a week without you, and you want to waste on pointless topics." Damon tried to calm Bonnie's anxiety.

He repositioned her on top of him and sat so he could kiss her. He slowly drew the contour of her cupid bow lips with his tongue.

"One, I'm not leaving; I can't leave. Two, don't do anything stupid because I'm not losing you because of Kol. Third, Leila isn't visiting a prison," she spoke while gently pushing him back.

He tried to kiss her again, and she glared at him for trying to distract her with such baseness. She tried to put her shirt back in place even as Damon tried to slide his finger inside. She swatted his fingers and glared at him more. He smiled innocently and placed a chaste kiss on her cheek. She was grateful his shenanigans; he distracted her long enough to be able to be playful.

"You aren't dropping out, and Sheila doesn't need more reason to kill me. We're doing everything the way it was supposed to happen."

"Leila won't take it right." Bonnie tried to justify her decision.

Damon rolled his eyes at her excuses and laid back down. He dragged her with him, and started to roll her hair around her finger.

"Leila has almost erased the entire day from her mind. She is with her nonno, being extremely vocal about moving to New York," Damon told her, invalidating her excuses.

Damon knew there was more to the matter, and he was willing to listen. She sighed exasperatedly.

"I don't feel safe leaving her just after this morning. I'm not ready for any separation," she confessed timidly.

She expected Damon to make another snarky comment about Leila and her needing to break the umbilical cord. She could sense his need to, but he kept it to himself.

Tonight, he understood her need to be extremely close to Leila. It took Damon an hour to find the strength to leave Leila's room. Ultimately, he woke his daughter up just to confirm she was in one piece, which was why Leila was now playing with Giuseppe.

"Then take few days but you're going next week, and we will just have to join you there. We don't need a week to move over there," Damon proposed.

Bonnie eyebrows rose at how fast Damon came up with a solution. A moment later, she smiled knowingly and rolled on her side to face his profile. Sometimes, she enjoyed dating a pretty man, because as far as she was concerned handsome was not suitable.

"What date did you pick when you changed my flight?" she asked.

Obviously, he would foresee her reaction about leaving Leila after this morning. She covered his lips with hers, and they share a tender kiss.

"Three days, and so you don't miss your important meeting. I changed the hotel reservation."

"I love you." She kissed him another time.

"Nothing, I didn't know." He answers with cockiness.

"My dad promised to keep his distance?" Damon asked, rolling onto his side.

"He doesn't have to, I promised to be civil." Bonnie sighed.

"If you want civility, you'll have to be civil as well," Damon started to speak hesitantly.

"Babe?" Bonnie questioned because she did not like his lingering tone.

When he used it, she was supposed to assume some catastrophe happened or would happen. She glared at him, concerned, silently pressing him to say more. Too much happened today and Bonnie was unsure of how much she could survive. Damon started to massage her temple to prevent a building headache.

"Rose appears to have found her maternal instincts. She called earlier to inform me that she was coming, but with the crazy morning and afternoon it slipped my mind," Damon blurted out, wishing it was incomprehensible.

"When?" Bonnie questioned as she started to understand why Damon was actually informing her.

"In two days…" he continued hesitantly.

"Slipped your mind?" She cocked an eyebrow to emphasize her question

Although, she already knew his answer. Lying by omission was a sin Damon would unavoidably commit if he thought it would protect Bonnie.

"I didn't intend to say anything because she wouldn't have been around when you came back from New York. I love you too by the way," he confessed and tried to return to her good graces.

"I don't care what she does as long as she doesn't hurt my daughter."

"Feel free to let her know."


	27. Chapter 27

Hello, sorry for the really slow updates, but I have the worst writer block or more like a bamon specific writer block.

I was contemplating to stop writing for this specific fandom , and I came to a decision after posting chapter 18 of tell her karma is a bitch. I think it must be the worst chapter I wrote or I may have lost the readers.

It matters very little because the reaction to that chapter helped to cement a decision, which I was having a hard time to make. However , surrogate, unoriginal fairy tale , and tell her karma is a bitch will be the last stories that I write for bamon fandom. If you follow me on twitter or tumblr, you may already know because I complain about the lack of feedback and reviews.

I'm extremely drained with my last year of medical school, but I promised to try and finish these three stories before the end of year. If I can't then I will delete them so you don't have to wonder the end or ask for an update.

Thanks for reading those stories and an extra thanks to those who review because I'm trying to finish the story for you.

So a head up, the next update will be slow but you will get your update.

3 more chapters to go until the end. hope you stick with me until the finish line. I'm working on the next update.

Elsa


	28. Chapter 28

**Long overdue update, here it is.**

 **I don't own the vampire diaries**

 **Please, review**

* * *

 **Chapter XXVII**

* * *

A toy flew past Bonnie's head, and Bonnie shared a concerned look with Damon. They stared at their daughter while she raged. Soon, Leila started to break off her dolls' legs. They were baffled at Leila's sudden outburst. Bonnie sighed, and glanced at Damon. When were they supposed to intervene?

Damon shrugged and walked up to the toy on the floor. The young man picked the doll up and returned it to his daughter, who instantaneously threw it back on the floor. Under shock, Damon took a minute to react to Leila's sudden aggressiveness. In the last week, she had shown no sign of anger. She was happy the last days, and all the sudden, Leila was breaking her toys. The anger was silent for a few hours, and she started to target a specific individual. Damon again picked up the toy. It was a new doll, but it was also a gift from Rose.

To Damon, the situation started to make sense when he recognized the toy. To confirm his suspicions, Damon grabbed another doll with broken limbs, and the gift bearer was Rose. The young man changed his mind on scolding his daughter, but Bonnie did not have the new perspective on the problem. She did not notice Damon's change of demeanor. The Bennett woman started to pry another toy out of Leila's grip while the little girl attempted to continue her act of destruction.

"Leila Mariana Salvatore." She started to use the young child full name when Leila reacted violently to Bonnie's attempt to take the doll from her hand.

Every time Bonnie tried to get the doll, Leila swatted her mother's hand. It was a rare occurrence to see Bonnie display any parental authority. It startled Leila, who froze for a second. When Bonnie's voice hardened, and she ultimately removed the toy from her daughter's hand, Leila started to break into tears. The young child ran into Damon's comforting arms. More shocked than exasperated by her child's reaction, Bonnie stood frozen on her spot, and she stared at the father and daughter duo.

Damon shook his head to reassure Bonnie and to clear any idea, which could allow her to believe that she was the reason behind her daughter's reaction. Bonnie was too shaken to understand Damon. Leila never reacted in such manner around her mother. Abruptly, Bonnie's insecurity about motherhood threatened to resurface. The young woman took a deep breath, and she ultimately joined the hugging pair. Bonnie put her hand on Leila's back, and she started to rub it to soothe the little girl.

"Mommy is sorry, baby." With a softer tone, Bonnie attempted to appease her crying child.

Although, it quickly became an impossible task. Leila continued to cry louder and harder with each passing second. Bonnie's facial expression mirrored extreme concern. Damon placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it.

" Give us a minute." He hesitantly asked, and he knew how Bonnie would react to his request.

There was an obvious heartbreak, and his request convinced Bonnie that she was the reason behind Leila's tears. Damon wanted to calm Bonnie's anguish, and he mouthed rose. Suddenly, her emotional state switched from heartbreak to growing anger. Damon's request did not please Bonnie, but she left for Leila's sake.

"we will talk later," Bonnie whispered when she made it to the staircase, which led to the floor where their room was. She had previously warned him about the consequences if Rose hurt their daughter. In less than two days in town, it seemed Leila's estranged mother did what she always did the best. Bonnie stared at her family. Leila continued to cry while Damon slowly tried to get a word out her. The Bennett woman needed to deal with the anger building in her. Instead of returning to the room, which she shared with Damon, Bonnie grabbed her handbag and left the house with a sole purpose.

….

….

…

…

"It's okay, Principessa." Damon placed a kiss on Leila's forehead, and he settled her on his hip.

The Salvatore man started to pace back and forth to soothe his daughter's nerves, but Leila's sob did not subdue. He knew it was the wrong idea to allow Rose around his baby. The Italian woman had been in town for two days, and Leila had visited her three times. From the moment they picked Rose up at the airport, Damon could foresee this outcome. Rose had obvious ulterior motives for her visit. However, the young father chose to forget his resentment for Leila, who was excited to meet her mama.

 _So much for a mother_. If Bon could tell the truth to their daughter, the situation may be different.

Rose was everything but a mother to Leila. In the airport, the truth resurfaced. When Rose was unable to share Leila's excitement, Damon should have ended everything. He should have spotted the red flags and drawn the line. The woman did not allow Leila to hug her because she was carrying her younger son, Michele.

Damon should have assumed the worse, and he should have known that tears would come. Was he repeating past mistakes? Was he acting maliciously toward Rose because His anger with her never went away? The second alternative was unlikely, as Damon ceased to worry about matters concerning Rose. He did not care enough to resent her. Four years after their divorce, he could surely say that he was indifferent to her. The anger over how their marriage ended no longer existed. The frustration with her lack of support during Leila's battle against leukemia no longer ate him. The thoughts, which Damon spared to his ex-wife were about ways to accommodate Leila's needs. He might not want to deal with Rose, but Leila with the entirety of her enormous heart loved Rose. Unfortunately, the young man started to admit that he might have to teach his daughter how to get over loving Rose.

"Principessa, it is okay, and your mommy is not angry with you." Damon attempted to calm his daughter, but when he mentioned Bonnie, all his efforts were lost. He placed another kiss on her forehead.

"Do you want to tell papa what is wrong, and so I can fix it?" Damon started a new approach, and Leila shook her head a dismissal.

"Okay! What if I give you a cup of gelato and so you can calm down." Damon proposed, and Leila again rejected his offer.

With that last failure, Damon understood how dire the situation was. Until today, there was no pain a cup of gelato could not soothe in Leila's world. A gelato was her comfort food, and at the worse time of her young life, when she would vomit everything, she continued to eat her favorite flavor. Leila would refuse every type of food, which Damon tried to convince her to eat, but she would attempt to eat as much vanilla and coconut gelato as she could with her painful gums. When Leila's bones were too sore, and she could not leave her bed, she would request a gelato.

Whatever Rose did to the young child, it was remarkably cruel. Damon's heart broke, and he wanted to march to Rose's hotel room to avenge his crying daughter. He intended to do so once Leila retrieved her smile. For the ensuing minutes, the young man consoled his daughter, and he listened to Leila wept until her cries became small noises with no tears. Half an hour later, the room quieted down, and Leila snuggled on her father's side. The seven years old continued to hide her face in Damon's chest. Fortunately, she had ceased to cry.

…

…

…

…

Damon walked to the kitchen, and he sat his daughter on a stool. He took out her favorite gelato flavor from the fridge, and from the cupboard, Damon grabbed two big spoons. The young father pushed one spoon toward his pouting daughter, and Leila silently picked it up. Damon opened the vanilla- coconut flavored gelato, and he placed the enormous bucket between Leila and him. Leila stared at the creamy delicacy, and she did not want to dig in it. The little girl returned her spoon to the kitchen's counter. With saddened thoughts, she considered her past actions. Leila placed her hands on her cheek, and her entire body sunk on the stool.

 _I shouldn't have, and Mommy will abandon me._ Leila thought with desperation. She had messed up more than she expected.

Now, it would happen, and she would be abandoned. Her mama told her what would happen. Leila wanted to cry all the tears in her small body, and she had cried until her eyes were burning.

Perhaps, she should ask her father about it. With a heavy heart and teary eyes, Leila faced Damon. She drew a deep breath, and she hesitated to express her concern. The child struggled to step down her stool. Leila walked up to Damon's seat, and she struggled to climb on her father's lap. Damon lifted Leila, and she circled his neck once she was on his laps. The little girl inhaled, and she needed all her strength to speak.

"Papa, what happens when you're abando...ned?" She could barely pronounce the world, but Leila needed an answer.

The little girl needed to know what would happen if Bonnie would abandon her. She did not know the definition of the word abandoned. Despite Leila's lack of knowledge, Rose's tone had convinced the little girl that it was a serious matter. Leila knew it was a thing, which she did not want Bonnie to do. Although after her tantrum, Bonnie would abandon her. She was not a well-behaved child. With her thoughts growing darker, Leila's eye swelled with tears, and she hid her face in her father's chest.

"Is that what Rose told you? Did she say that she will abandon you?" His tone miraculously remained monotonous, and he did not allow the anger to slip through his words.

Damon remembered to say level-headed for Leila's sake. The little girl was almost breaking under stress and panic. He kissed the crown of his daughter's head.

Leila looked at her father, and she hesitated to speak. What happened if she ended up in more trouble for speaking up? The curly head child stared at the gelato on the counter, and she did not know how to proceed. Her tears restarted to fall. Damon cradled his daughter, and he wiped any tears that fell on her reddened cheeks.

"Leila, I won't say anything to anyone what you tell me, and I won't be mad at you. Salvatore's promises are unbreakable." The young father solemnly said, and he extended his hand to his daughter, who shook it.

"Mommy will abandon me. Does something happen when they abandoned you?" Leila wiped her tears, and she expectantly looked at her father.

"Bonbon will never abandon you, and you should not worry. She promised to be by your side forever." Damon said with a conviction, which was strong enough to soothe parts of Leila's fears.

Although, it did not clear every of her doubt. She already knew that Bonnie would never leave her, but she did not know what happened after an abandonment.

"Mama said I should not call mommy, mommy because mommy will abandon me soon enough, as she did before. Papa, what do I do so mommy doesn't abandon me?" Leila asked with the most seriousness.

She understood the gravity of abandonment, though she did not have a clear perspective of the word. Rose's expression and the tone of her voice led Leila to that conclusion.

"Do you know what abandoned mean?" Damon asked when he started to suspect that Leila did not fully grasp the meaning of what Rose shared with her.

The little girl shook her head, and curls bounced in every direction. She looked at her father with the expectation that her father would provide the meaning of the word.

"It means that you'll be left alone, and she would leave. Someone goes away and leaves you behind. Not like with mommy's trip tomorrow. They leave forever..." She interrupted him with her gasp of indignation.

"Mommy would never do that," Leila said with conviction, and Damon smiled.

Her confidence surprised Damon, though it made sense that Leila would feel that way. Never once Bonnie showed any sign that would lead her daughter to think the contrary.

"Yes, she would never do it because you're her world, and she loves you." Damon agreed, and he picked her the spoon, which Leila had previously discarded.

"I know, and mommy always tells me to remember that she loves me more every day," Leila said, and she took a spoonful of vanilla-coconut gelato.

She was over her tantrum as if nothing had happened in the last hour. Damon in his side started to plan a meeting with Rose. If her goals were to traumatize his child, she needed to exit Leila's life forever. Despite how hard it would be on Leila, it was time to protect his daughter from Rose. The interaction between his daughter and his ex-wife was nefarious to Leila's psyche.

"I hope you know I will also never abandon you, Principessa," Damon added for good measure.

Leila nodded absent-mindedly, and her focus was on the gelato, which she ate with gusto. With her mouth full, she could not speak. Damon ruffled her hair until it was a messy pile on her left side.

"Also, you would have to apologize to your mother. You worried her with your earlier antics." Damon started to chastise her when he noticed that they averted the crisis.

"Is mommy angry with me?" Leila stopped eating, and once again, she was a ball of anxiety.

"Bonbon, angry with you? Never! She was worried because she was afraid that you were in pain." Damon corrected Leila's wrong assumption, and he killed further doubts, which she could have.

"Mama, she ..." Leila stopped talking while she considered the information, which she was about to share.

"Bonbon is not going to do what your mama does. You should know that your mommy loves you more than she loves me, Grams, and anyone else. You're the love of her life, and I'm a bit jealous. You come first for Bonnie. She is the only person who loves you as much as I do or more, which is why she always tells you that she loves you. You may be a handful and too energetic sometimes. Sometimes, you have to apologize. In the end, you're her baby girl. There is nothing, which you can do to change her love. Do you understand?" Damon questions a contrite Leila.

The little girl nodded, and she hugged her father's waist. Damon kissed the crown of her head.

"Do you feel better?" He asked after kissing her cheeks.

Leila smiled and nodded. Father and daughter continued to dig in the vanilla-coconut gelato.

 **Babe, whatever you decided to do, please, remember that I'm too delicate for conjugal visitation**. Damon texted Bonnie and he did not miss her abrupt exit from their home.

* * *

Bonnie's phone rang, and she ignored it. Her blood was boiling with fury, and she did not want Damon to talk her back to reason. The Bennett woman had tried to be objective, and she had silenced her worry concerning Rose. She attempted to be the voice of reason with Damon.

"Let's just put up with her for Leila."

If she could be in the same room with Giuseppe Salvatore for her daughter's sake, she could do the same with Rose. Although, she briefly met Damon's ex-wife, and it was not the best first physical encounter. The stigma and weight of their last conversation had been heavy in the atmosphere. The trading of insult continued to hang between the pair of women.

Bonnie attempted to forget her animosity toward Rose for her daughter, and so that day, she allowed a fake smile to grace her lips. Since that encounter, the young woman had avoided any following interaction between her family and Damon's ex-wife. Rose did not share the same reservation, and she had attempted to provoke Bonnie. Ultimately, Damon and Giuseppe had to step in to prevent the escalade of the situation.

On the scale of hatred for Rose, father and sons broke it. Giuseppe and Damon shared similar contempt for Rose. Stefan continuously criticized Bonnie and Damon's decision to allow Rose around his niece. Giuseppe started to share quotes about foolish hearts, as he attempted to keep his promise not to interact directly with Bonnie. Damon had not been willing to allow his ex-wife to share a space with his daughter. However, Bonnie pointed out that Leila's happiness was the only factor, which mattered. Perhaps, she had silenced her common sense because she refused to believe that anyone would want to hurt a child.

Now, Bonnie regretted her naivety. Her daughter was drowning in sorrow, and she could not help much. The Bennett's woman anger grew until it took control of her mind. She was tired of people threatening her child's happiness. She was angry with the Kol and Rose of this world. Frustrated, Bonnie raised her hand to knock on the door of Rose's hotel room. Under her growing anger, Bonnie's soft nature completely disappeared. She continued to pound on the brunette woman's door until Rose opened.

For a few seconds, Anger slowed Bonnie's brain. Although the longer she stared at Rose with murderous intent, Bonnie retrieved her ability to speak. The young woman pushed to Rose, and she entered the room without an invitation. Bonnie disregarded the other woman's anger. The conversation could not happen at the porch of a hotel's room door.

…

…

…

…

"What did you do to my daughter?" Bonnie's tone was surprisingly calm, though her body language started to display her fury.

The Bennett woman understood the need to maintain her countenance around a woman of conniving nature like Rose. She did not want to do anything, which could help Rose. In truth, Bonnie did not need to spend an hour around Rose to categorize her as a specific type of woman. The brunette woman was beautiful, and her beauty fueled her vanity. Failure and rejection were unusual to her, but her marriage with Damon had shined with those flaws. Rose was vindictive, and she wanted everyone around her to unhappy when things were not favorable to her. The collateral damage did not matter. Leila was collateral damage in Rose's vendetta against Damon.

"Your daughter?" Rose lifted a perfectly trimmed eyebrow, and she glared at Bonnie.

She could not believe the audacity of Damon's monthly girlfriend. Although, the Italian woman needed to admit that Bonnie might be a bit more than the monthly flavor. From the information, which she pried from Leila, the couple had been together longer than few months. The romance between her ex-husband and this obnoxious woman was solid. Rose was not the happiest about it.

"If how you treat her in an indication, Leila is not your daughter." Bonnie countered with confidence.

Nothing in Rose could intimidate her. Not her aristocratic posture nor her look filled with disdain. Bonnie did not care for the past relationship between the woman and her boyfriend.

"And she is yours because she comes attached to Damon and his fortune. I mean, you were always able to put a value on her. How much did she cost again?" Rose spat while she moved around Bonnie and reached the bar in the corner of the room.

Beforehand, Rose's words might have affected Bonnie. However, the young woman no longer carried the guilt of her past actions. Her conversation with Giuseppe was cathartic, and the follow-up conversation with Damon was liberating. Ultimately, she accepted that she did not need excuses for what happened seven years ago. Her younger-self might have been misguided, and she made a series of regrettable decisions. When it mattered the most, she had done the sensible thing. Leila did not grow around an addict and a fragile teenager.

"She is my daughter because I'm the only maternal figure that she has known in her short life. I'm her mother in every sense of the term and not because I carried her for nine months. She is not simply a carbon copy of myself. I'm her mother because she sees me in that light. She thinks of me as her mother, and I do a better job at raising her than you ever attempted to do. I'm her mother on her birth certificate and everything that matters. I care little for titles, but I'm proud of this one. If you think that Damon is a factor in my role in my daughter's life, I pity your stupidity and delusion," Bonnie replied without faltering on any word.

She did not need to prove anything to Rose, but she needed to explain to the other woman, where she drew the limits.

For a minute, Rose was silent. She was almost pensive, and Bonnie's words brought to light factors, which she had never been able to grasp with Leila. The fact that the little girl called her mama did not matter. From the first day, Rose was not satisfied with the deal, which she got with Leila. Damon had a daughter to claim as his own, and she had nothing but a reminder of her shortcoming. When they were a happily married couple, it did not matter. Leila was an extension of Damon. She had her father's eye, and Rose could tolerate the unknown visage, which belonged to her mother.

Over the years, the same visage became a taunt. A reminder that Leila was some other woman's child. Later, Rose's marriage became a farce, and Leila's became the daughter of the man, who was rejecting Rose. The sins of the father started to taint the daughter. Continuously facing the same pale blue eyes, which on the father contained disdain for Rose. She started to hate Leila as much as she hated his father. However, she could not let go of the little girl. As Rose said to Bonnie, Leila came attached to Damon and his fortune. Leila was a way to reach Damon, and she was the only way to hurt him. Accordingly, Rose pretended to love Leila and chose to fight for parental custody. It would hurt Damon, and she could care less about the child in the middle. If Leila was suffering, Damon was agonizing.

However, it did not make Damon repentant. Much like cheating with his best friend, it did not change anything. Rose married Enzo because she lost her husband for him. Ironically, she had the children that she wanted so much, but with the husband, who she did not want. With her children in the picture, she was winning over Damon. He was divorced and unhappy in his dating life. There were no longer the needs to pretend to care for Leila. Consequently, she neglected the little girl. When leukemia entered the equation, it was easier to let go of Leila. Damon would continue to drown in misery, and Rose almost forgot that Leila could be of use to her.

However, everything changed when Bonnie entered the picture. Rose could not help herself at that time, and she could not help herself now. It was the reason why she chose to spit her poison.

"One day, I might tell her what her so-called mother did. I will highlight how you sold her for chicken change. How long do you think Damon and you will play a happy family when Leila starts to hate you? A thing about Damon, you may believe that he loves you, but Leila is always his priority. The effort, which you put in it does not matter. Enjoy it while it last. Soon you will find yourself competing with a young child for his affection, and you will lose." Through her rage, Rose allowed her insecurities and resentment to resurface.

Rose appeared to be erratic, and her statement only cemented Bonnie's opinion of the woman. Disgusted, Bonnie chose to ignore the pathetic threat. She glanced at the other woman and decided to issue a warning.

"How long have you been jealous of Leila because she monopolizes the attention of a man, who you wanted to worship you? You failed to understand that Damon is a loving father because your pathetic-self could not muster enough love for a child, who tried her best to be a perfect daughter to please you. I don't care to know what goes on in your twisted mind, but I will warn you that I can do worse than anything your mind regards as evil." Bonnie readjusted her handbag.

"Stay away from my daughter. I don't intend to join the twisted game, which you want to play with Damon. If my daughter cries again because of you, I will hurt you, and I would be ready to face the legal consequences. You can return to your miserable life." She finished delivering her warning, and the young woman walked herself out without giving Rose a chance to reply.

However, her warning fell in deaf ears. Now more than ever, Rose wanted to destroy Damon's happy family, and she knew when it would be the perfect time to strike. Soon, Leila would learn about the tumultuous first day of her life.

* * *

Bonnie checked her blinking phone, and she allowed a small smile to sit on her lips after reading Damon's message. She walked inside the apartment, which was unusually quiet.

"Is anyone home?" Bonnie called when she found a dark living room.

Bonnie had returned home later than she intended to do when she left earlier, but after her conversation with Rose, she needed to cool down. The Bennett woman did not want Leila to see her in such state. The little girl suffered her turmoil, and she did not need more stress.

The house was incredibly silent, and it started to scare Bonnie. She knew that Lily, Sheila, and Giuseppe were trying to bond. Sheila was not the most amicable with the Salvatore patriarch. With the indifference, which Bonnie started to envy, Giuseppe could care less. However, Lily was adamant in her attempt to strengthen the family ties around Leila. The Salvatore matriarch would not allow the two others to avoid the tedious process to have a peaceful dinner. In the last days, Bonnie had been to more family dinner than necessary, and she was happy to escape one tonight. In her mood and with her flight tomorrow, she could easily snap at Giuseppe. Although, it would be improbable to alienate the older Salvatore with their limited interaction.

The sexagenarian held his promise to stay out of Bonnie's way. He was polite and charming at best in her presence, and sometimes, Bonnie almost forgot who the man was. When Giuseppe was around Leila, he became a soft old man. He could not resist a pout on his grandchild's face. During his interaction with his granddaughter, Giuseppe started to prove to Bonnie that she made a wise choice when she decided to overlook her grudges with the man. In truth, the situation with Giuseppe allowed Bonnie to believe that Rose could have been a good mother. Now, she no longer held such belief, and she would prevent any further toxic familial interaction between Leila and the vindictive woman.

Bonnie dug into her pocket to retrieve her phone. Tonight, was her last night in town, and she wanted to spend her remaining time with her family. She suspected that it was the reason why Lily, Giuseppe, and Sheila did not come for an impromptu visit. It was strange how their apartment always had a crowd. Damon joked that she should get accustomed to the lifestyle of a traditional Italian wife. Dealing with her in-laws came with the territory. Damon started to make a lot of marriage's jokes and innuendo, but Bonnie did not want to read more into his jokes. She was trying to find her footing in their fusional relationship, and they had grown so close in a year that she often wondered if there was a risk to lose their individualism. Accordingly, a wedding would increase her stress, and she was very unprepared for married-life. Beforehand thinking about a steady future was unsettling for Bonnie, and her signs of progress were remarkable.

The young woman was about to call Damon when she heard loud whispers. It did not take a genius to know who was behind the noises. Leila's frame was invisible in the dark, but Leila's loud steps revealed her presence. Bonnie squinted to have a better view of her daughter, but Leila's small body collided with her legs. The Bennett woman almost fell because Leila could be a real ball of energy. Bonnie's heart dilated, and she instantaneously felt relieved when her daughter hugged her knees.

"Surprise, Mommy." Leila excitedly shouted and pointed at the dark living room.

Bonnie attempted to find the source of her daughter's excitement, and she wondered what the angel was hiding. Damon should appear at any second. Father and daughter shared the same mischievous nature.

"You were supposed to wait for the light to be on before you could shout surprise, Principessa." Damon entered the room as Bonnie expected.

"Sorry..." Leila answered, but she hardly sounded apologetic. "Did I spoil the surprise, mommy?" She asked with a hint of worry in her voice.

"Which surprise?" Bonnie asked while she bent to pick up her daughter.

Leila wrapped her arm around Bonnie's neck, and she rested her head on her mother's chest. The remaining of Bonnie's anger and bitter mood completely evaporated when she breathed her daughter's hair.

"Daddy and I bought you..." Damon covered her mouth with his large palm, and he rolled his eyes.

"It is no longer a surprise if you tell her," Damon added incredulously.

"Sorry..." Leila renewed her past sentiment.

Bonnie laughed and kissed the crown of her daughter's head. When Damon finally stood by Bonnie's side, he placed a quick peck on her lips. He leaned to whisper in her ear.

"Do I need to send a cleaning crew to her hotel." The tone was teasing, but if the need was there, Damon could have it arranged.

"Maybe next time, I will tell you later," Bonnie answered with the same conspiratory tone.

Ultimately, they focused on their daughter, and Damon removed a curl from her face.

"Don't you have something to tell your mother?" He encouragingly said.

Leila deeply inhaled and looked at her mother. She bit her lower lip, and she hesitated. In the last months, she took Bonnie's stress tic. The little girl looked into Bonnie's eyes, and she eased when she did not find anger in the green irises. Through her experience with Rose, Leila had learned to recognize some emotions. Anger was a common thing, but affection was a rare thing. In Bonnie's eye, the child only saw love and affection, and so it reassured her.

"I'm sorry." Leila enunciated every word.

Bonnie was about to absolve her daughter of all guilt, but Damon's glare told her to abstain. Although they knew the reason for her tantrum, the time was perfect to teach her about owning up to her actions. Bonnie was too much of the amiable parent, and Damon knew that he would fall upon him to implement the punishment if there was a need for one.

"Can you tell your mom the reason why you're sorry?" Damon pursued.

"Mommy, I'm sorry for being a naughty asshole, mys...be...having, and for being rude to mommy," Leila repeated what she had practiced with her father, though she mispronounced the hardest word, and judging her mother glare at her father, she also put him in trouble.

"That is okay, baby. Now, your father has some explaining to do." Bonnie continued to glare at Damon, and Leila started to imitate her.

" She needs to understand what an asshole is very early." Damon was unfazed, and he ran his knuckles on Bonnie's cheek.

"Papa said an asshole is..." A daring glare for Bonnie silenced the little girl.

"it is a word you should not say, and your papa should not teach you bad words." Bonnie finished Leila's statement.

"You can spoil her, and I can't. Double standard much." Damon added in a mock-serious tone.

"Is this the hill you want to die on, and you're willing to sacrifice your candies." Bonnie offered with a sweet smile.

"Babe, I'm the candy." Damon countered.

"That's not true, papa." Leila decided to correct the misinformation.

"I need a son to support my claim in this house," Damon said, and he poked Leila's ribs.

Bonnie rolled her eyes, and she decided to ignore the tirade, which would follow on how they outnumbered him.

"Papa, the surprise." Leila decided to remind her parents the reason why they stood in the dark.

The little girl ordered Damon with a bossy tone, which she started to pick up from her mother.

"She is seven years old and bossing me around. Her mother's daughter." Damon taunted the pair.

" Bonbon, close your eyes and pretend to be surprised because Leila and I worked hard on this." He said while he switched the light.

Bonnie exaggeratedly gasped, and she had a happy cry when she faced the banderole, which had a sweet message on it.

 _Mommy returns to school_ , and there was giant good luck to the side. Below the banderole many new ballerina kits. A look at the vibrant pink of each tutu helped Bonnie identify the person who picked the dancing outfits. She smiled at the gift, and she tightly hugged Leila.

"I got you other colors of tutus, but she wanted only to display those she also has. You won't have to live your entire life with candy pink outfit," Damon whispered in her ears.

"I love you," Bonnie answered, and she felt relieved.

"You know there are many ways to prove that statement, and I mean an entire week alone." He wiggled his eyebrow and smirked.

"Don't be naive. I'm all hers tonight, and you know it. You should add an extra pillow in our bed." Bonnie broke Damon's fantasy with fact.

"Then a quickie." Damon recovered Bonnie's lips with his.

The kiss was slow but demanding, and he poured all the passion he could muster through the dance of their tongue. Each stroke of tongues created tiny electrical tingles in Bonnie's spine. Damon put soft pressure on her lower lips, and he ultimately broke their kiss, when they both needed to refill her lungs.

"Ewww." Leila reminded her parent of her presence.

"Do you want a little brother?" Damon questioned his daughter with a solemn expression, and Leila excitedly nodded.

"Well then stop sabotaging my effort, Principessa," he said with a teasing smirk, and he winked at his daughter.

"Damon..." Bonnie swatted his shoulder, and he shrugged unapologetically.

"Mommy, can you make a little brother?" Leila innocently asked.

"The people have spoken, Miss Bennett." Damon gloated, and Bonnie glared at him. He kissed the crown of her head, and he dragged his lips to her earlobe. "So, that quickie."

Bonnie pressed her lips to his neck, and he could feel her tongue subtle teasing his sensitive spot.

A definite yes.

"Are you not tired, sleepy or anything, Principessa," Damon questioned his daughter, and he might as well speed the process.

"I want to play with mommy. Let's go, mommy." Leila grabbed Bonnie's hand, and she started to drag her mother toward her room.

"Sorry ..." Bonnie mouthed.

* * *

"Stefan is babysitting, tonight. Get your playing time, and then you will be all mine." Damon said while he pulled his phone out of his pocket. He needed to plan a different night, and Stefan would have to take one for the team.

"Cancel your plan, baby bro. Bonnie and I need adult time." Damon said as soon as Stefan replied.

"Damon, can you not overshare?" Stefan groaned as he accepted his fate for tonight.

"I'm not oversharing with you, and I would not want to tempt you with your past allegation. So when can I expect you because I need to call the concierge to have the apartment key." The older Salvatore asked his younger brother.

"Asked Dad and mon to babysit," Stefan replied.

"Are you going to listen to the four hours lecture, which Giuseppe would start?" Damon countered with a frustrated tone.

"Damon Salvatore, you could learn from your elder. Papa..." Unable to suppress his laugh, Stefan did not finish his sentence. He knew how terrible it could be to hear Giuseppe preach about the art of seducing a woman.

"When I start having children, I will need you and Bonnie to commit yourself to the sacrifice. I need two hours to finish." Stefan decided to allow his brother to breathe.

"Yeah, you will send me your football team when you have one." Damon agreed, and He mumbled words of affection to his brother.

"Tell Bonnie that I love her." Stefan joked around, and it was an inner joke between Stefan and her.

"She knows, and she is waiting to get my fortune then you can run away with your secret child," Damon replied on his girlfriend behalf.

"Bye, Damiano. Hold on until I come to save you." Stefan closed the conversation.

"Bye, Stefanito."

….

…

…

..

Stefan returned two hours later as he promised, but Bonnie was dead asleep. Damon pressed a kiss on her forehead, and he created a small space for himself on Leila's bed. The morning after Bonnie left after giving into Damon's naughty request. She was sure that it was strange to disappear for an hour while waiting for her plane, but Leila had only allowed Bonnie out of her sight when they made it to the airport. Stefan could babysit, and the planes distracted Leila.

Now, Bonnie had her back pressed to the greasy door of an airport bathroom, and she could not say anything more than soft moans while Damon drew patterns on her stomach with his zealous tongue.

"you're a bad influence." Bonnie kissed Damon passionately while she attempted to fix his shirt. Previously, she had made quick work of the buttons. In her excitement, she might have broken the buttons around the collar of his Henley. However, Bonnie was eager to press her finger to Damon's chiseled abdomen. She did more than pressing her finger to his abdomen, and the scratch lines, which she left behind, told a tempestuous story.

"Hmm, am I?" Damon continued to suck her earlobe as he pulled down the skirt, which he had shoved up to allow his fingers to graze her wet vagina.

"I don't think you are going to need this back." Damon bent to pick up the panties, which he discarded hastily in the heat of passion.

He needed better access to hit her g-spot. Bonnie did not regret losing her agent provocateur lace thong. With dedication and precision, Damon made her scream his name while he drove his engorged dick in her warm core. The Bennet woman took her lace panties, and she pushed it into Damon's pocket. Bonnie's hand roamed on his open zipper, and she pushed his semi-hard manhood back into his pants. Obviously, the man planned his morning with a goal in mind. Damon was commando under his tailored jean.

"You can start a collection." She pulled the zipper of his pants up.

Damon smirked, and he kissed Bonnie hard. The kiss was as dazzling as the kiss, which led to the moment of unrestrained passion, which corrupted her to the point to have sex in an airport.

Damon Salvatore could kiss a girl out of her panties, and it was a good thing that Bonnie did not presently wear one. His fingers were exploring her thighs, and his hand pushed apart her inner thighs. His thumb covered her clitoris, and he started to rub the sensitive bundle. Their previous tryst already stimulated her body, and her contracting core told Bonnie that she would not need more for another orgasm. When his forefinger and middle finger parted her labia, she sucked a deep breath and pulled his hair.

"Fuck..." She moaned in his shoulder, and she bit her tongue until it was bleeding.

Bonnie attempted to swallow her moans, but when the sound of zipper drew her attention, she gave up. Damon pushed his length in her expecting core, and the animalistic growl, which he allowed to leave his lips made Bonnie shiver. This time, his thrusts were slower than their first round. Bonnie's back scratched the wooden toilet door when Damon's deep long strokes almost broke her body. He felt good in her, and Bonnie excited core contracted around his dick every time. She was ready to milk him dry.

"Part your legs wider..." Damon's hot breath caressed her skin, and it felt like a spring breeze when he whispered words in the crook of her neck.

"Come on, Bonbon. Give me more." His breathy words did the trick.

His command became her wishes, and Bonnie did the impossible. She opened her legs wider than her original suppleness and the tricky position against the door permitted. Damon continued to pump into her with his hard dick until her core started to contract. Her feminine juice coated his pants due to the sudden overflow

Damon grazed his teeth along the skin of her sorely hard nipple until her ear. After every bite, there was a kiss to dull the sweet pain. His name became her mantra. Damon sucked her earlobe, and he whispered sweet nothings in her ears until her contracted walls immobilized his dick.

"You look so beautiful when I make you come. Babe, come for me." He pressed on her clitoris until Bonnie's vision falters.

"Fuck..." Bonnie wanted to breathe, but the hormonal explosion, which consumed her body, closed her airways. It was almost like drowning, and her head was light. His voice was distant. "Damon..." She cried and became boneless.

Damon removed his mouth from her nipples, and he kissed her in a way, which returned her mind to the same frenzy sensation that her orgasm created. Damon continued to thrust in her warmth and until he followed her into the blissful state of a petite mort.

"I love you, Bonbon." He whispered against the crook of her neck while he helped her stand right.

Her juiced ruined his clothes, but Damon had no regret.

"You're a terrible influence. I can't believe that you convinced me," Bonnie spoke between satisfied giggle.

"I love to steer you away from the pristine good girl image." Damon kissed her, and he quickly dragged her out of the bathroom.

They could risk a fine, and it was miraculous that no one reported them. The couple promptly returned to their daughter and Stefan.

"Papa, why do you have new clothes?" Leila asked as soon as she spotted her parent.

Damon replaced his sullied clothes, and he was in his usual dark color. However, only children had eyes from detail. Stefan started to laugh, and his laugh became louder when Bonnie started to blush.

"Your mommy did not like the old one, and she took them away." Damon glanced at Bonnie, and he teased her with a mischievous smirk. She poked his shoulder, and he lightly shoved with his shoulder.

"But it is the same thing, and next time take a pink shirt." Leila pointed out the obvious and threw in a piece of advice.

Stefan continued to laugh to the point of tears, and Leila glanced at her uncle with concern.

"Mommy..." She called for Bonnie's attention, and she pointed at a flying plane.

They stayed for half an hour, and Bonnie took her flight.

* * *

Rose did not rush her grand reveal. As promised to Sheila, who no one had informed that the Italian woman was no longer allowed around Leila, Rose took Leila to the park. She intended to take advantage of Bonnie's departure the night before. However, why not offer the little girl a moment of joy before scarring her for life with the truth of her lineage. Rose sat on a bench, and she secured her youngest son on her laps.

"Mama?" Leila attempted to catch Rose's attention, but the brunette woman barely raised her head to acknowledge the little girl, who she found annoying.

"You can go play with one of those... toboggan." Rose dismissively said as she started to search in her bag to retrieve her son's pacifier.

"Mommy..." A glare from Rose stopped Leila, and the angry eyes continued to threaten the little girl.

Leila no longer dared to voice her objection about going to play with any adult watching her. Her parents forbade her to do it. Now, Rose attempted to put her in trouble. Rose focused on her son, and her body language dismissed Leila. Michele had started to cry, and she attempted to calm him. For a few minutes, she scarcely raised her head to check on Leila, who purposelessly stood in the middle of the park.

For half an hour, Rose unsuccessfully attempted to calm Michele, and slowly, she started to forget about the other child, who she was supposed to watch.

…

…

…

…

Kol Mikealson was nothing but a man dedicated to revenge. After his last encounter with Damon, his eagerness to ruin Bonnie and her boyfriend's life had grown tenfold. He did not like when someone challenged him. Kol still had a broken arm and a few broken ribs to add insult to injury. The Salvatore had done more than issuing a challenge, and Damon had wounded Kol's pride. Consequently, he was at the edge of insanity.

The young Mikealson had started to plot and work toward his revenge on his hospital bed. Although, Kol never expected the day to avenge his wounded pride to come so soon. His retaliation was the result of the negligence of a careless nanny. At least, he believed Rose to be nothing more than a woman paid to take care of Bonnie's brat. This faithful morning, he had started to watch the Salvatore movement. As soon as he was able to stand, which was last night, Kol rushed to Damon's apartment.

He knew Bonnie was not in town, but the petite woman was not his target. Kol wanted to hurt Bonnie, and he wished to break Damon to the point of insanity. Therefore, the perfect way to cause chaos was to involve the apple of their eyes. The Mikealson man focused his thoughts on Leila, and the little girl was standing by herself near the sled. Luck smiled upon Kol Mikealson. Once again, he looked at Rose, and she did not seem to care much about the little girl's antics. For Kol, the moment was perfect, and he needed to strike.

…

…

…

…

Leila noticed the strange man, who approached her, and she tensed. She looked back at Rose, and she tried quietly to catch her attention. Usually, when she was scared of anyone, Leila rushed to her parents. However, it would not be possible to run to Rose. The distance between her and Rose was long for Leila's short legs. With fast steps, the strange man started to close the gap between her and him.

Perhaps, he was not coming for her. However, Bonnie and Damon always encouraged her to call for them if she was scared. Now, Leila was terrified, and she wanted the safety of her parents' arms. There was something strange about this man. She was not paranoid. Wounds and cuts covered his face, and he had an odd smile, which sat on his lips. Her young mind could not call the smile what it was. The smile was malicious, and he looked like a predator. Those bright pearly teeth scared her soul.

"Mama," Leila called with a shaking voice.

The strange man was so close to her, and he reached for Leila's arm. The child attempted to dodge his hand, but she was slower than he was. He caught her arm and lifted her from the floor. Leila dangled on her arm, and she felt her shoulder wince. The pain shot through her entire body. Desperate and agonizing with pain, Leila emptied her lungs with a terrified scream.

"Mama." Leila cried as her body was undergoing violence, and once again, Rose disregarded her call for help.

"A minute." Rose threw annoyed, but the head did not rise.

There was always something with Damon's child, or so Rose had started to believe. Damon and Bonnie might have spoiled Leila. The little girl required too much attention or assistance, and sometimes, she wanted both. Every second, it did not matter how small the reason, or the hurt was. If no one served her, Leila needed to cry.

"MAMA." She sobbed when Kol's hand covered her mouth with his bandaged hand.

It smelled like a hospital, and Leila could not breathe. The little girl attempted to fight, though, with a broken arm and broken ribs, Kol was too strong for a frail seven years old child. Leila fought a losing battle, but she was her parent's daughter. Consequently, she attempted to bite the strange man. Her cries for help never reached Rose. The further Kol dragged her from the park, and Leila started to understand how abandonment felt. Rose abandoned her more than once, but it sunk in her mind as Kol threw her petite body in his back seat.

Ultimately, she bit Kol's fingers, and Leila shouted for someone, who she knew would have never abandoned her.

"Mommy..." She hurled until her world went black after Kol grabbed her head and slammed it into the car's door.

Ten minutes after the incident, Rose raised her head to why Leila started to be once again dramatic. She could not find the little girl.

"Leila." She called for the child, but silence was the answer.


End file.
